Author's Note: Another chapter coming up. Before you read, for the record, I want it noted that I've yet to see Black Panther: Wakanda Forever, so forgive me if I don't do a certain character justice here. I just hope I did enough.

Enjoy the chapter, the surprise guest, and the little twist at the end. Any and all comments are welcome.


From the war room, Eddie and most of his coworkers watched the news which included footages of grown men throwing flat Earth frisbees at space scientists.

"Trouble on the horizon today, as believers in the flat-Earth theory protested outside the National Air and Space Museum."

"The Earth's not round! It is flat!" the flat Earth protesters chanted. "We are here to protest that!"

"Yeesh." Eddie commented as JR turned off the TV. "Can't be as flat as their chants."

"Brock, don't be a bozo." JR said. "The Earth's not flat at all. Those conspiracy theorists are just dumb."

"Really?" Eddie asked. "But that's like the oldest conspiracy in the world."

"I would think the oldest conspiracy is that free will exists."

"Here's the real truth, Eddie." Gigi said. "The Earth's not flat. It's hollow, and filled with mole people, sea monsters, and that family from Land of the Lost."

"They don't know about the mole people?" Myc asked. "This is what happens when schools cut science funding. Sad."

Before the conversation could continue, Reagan walked in talking on the phone and carrying a white wedding cake.

"Yes. Of course, your majesty. Don't worry. Thank you for giving us permission. You will not regret it." She set the cake down and hung up. "I hope."

"Who were you talking to, Reagan?" Eddie asked.

"Namor the Sub-Mariner." Reagan said. "He's the king of the Atlanteans and one of the most temperamental men in the world. You do not want to get on his bad side."

"So why were you calling him?" Eddie asked. "You've been on edge ever since you found out about your mom's wedding."

Reagan sighed. "It's part of our truce with the Atlanteans. They don't wage war on the surface world, but we had to have a few conditions first. One of those conditions is that before Cognito does any business on the sea, we would have to get Namor's permission first. Thankfully, I caught him on a good day."

"Is it really that bad?" Brett asked.

"The last time Atlantis threatened war," JR said, "It was because Rand swindled Namor out of all his Atlantean alcohol. We've been on thin ice with Atlantis since then, but after Rand was fired, things got better. Still, I wouldn't make him angry if I were you."

"Wow. Sounds like this Namor guy's a real tool."

"So glad the wedding is tonight. I really hate tiptoeing around Namor's politics." Reagan said.

"Well, I love weddings." Gigi said. "They're a celebration of two souls who got sick of dating apps and settled."

"That's the kicker." Gigi said. "My mom is getting married to herself."

"Oh, that's two Tamikos on the invitation." Myc said. "I just thought your wife was a lesbian and I was racist."

"I still don't get it." Eddie said. "How can a person marry themselves? How does that work."

Reagan groaned. "It doesn't. My mom claims it's to 'make a statement about empowerment', but really, it's just another dramatic stunt to piss off my dad."

"Your mom hates your dad so much, that she set up this crazy wedding just to get his attention?" Eddie asked.

"I've heard of worse exes."

"Does Namor know about this?" Eddie asked.

"Are you kidding?" Reagan asked. "If I even mention my dad's name to him, he's going to be so angry, he'll boil the waters around him."

"Then why not convince your mom to hold her wedding somewhere else?" Andre asked.

"I tried. She wouldn't listen. She wants to piss my dad off as dramatically as she can, even on a romantic cruise." Reagan said. "That's why I've been working on an active cover-up. If my dad finds out about this wedding, it will be total chaos."

"Well, the rest of us are stoked for a cruise under the stars on JR's super-yacht." Brett said.

"Please, Brett, mega-yacht." JR corrected. "We have an onboard horse track."

"And I volunteer to be security." Glenn said. "I spent my own wedding doing cavity searches of suspicious guests. Turns out, we didn't even need a registry."

"See, Reagan? Weddings are magical." Brett said. "Stop worrying about your parents and have some fun."

"Fun? You have no idea what my parents are capable of!" Reagan said. "One of their arguments had a ripple effect that caused the LA riots! If my dad comes out to the sea unauthorized and Namor finds out, he'll see it as an act of war and flood the entire world! I just need to get through this, 'cause as soon as we re-dock, I'm on the next flight to Bora-Bora."

"I've seen her work all week, guys." Eddie said. "Trust me. She really needs a vacation."


"I saw your protest on the news." Rand said to the Flat-Earthers over his TV screen. "You really showed those globalists who's boss."

"After years of being ridicules for our beliefs," said their leader, Harold, "It's so nice to have someone on our side that's a respected scientist and not just a respected NBA player."

"Yeah, I'm choking on respect." Rand scoffed just as Reagan and Eddie returned home. "Oh, hey, honey, Brock, Venom. Still wanna kill me?"

"Tell him I wish he'd choke on his bong!"

"He does." Eddie said.

"Man, don't leave the house. It's really coming down out there." Reagan said gesturing the heavy rain outside. "I got us groceries so we can stay inside all weekend."

"Anyway, kids, meet the DC chapter of the Flat Earth Society." Rand introduced. The Flat-Earthers saw Reagan and screamed running into hiding. "They, uh, haven't seen a girl in a while."

"I did notice how far from diverse that group was."

"Rand, you support those idiots?" Eddie asked. Quickly, Rand grabbed the remote and muted the audio between them and the Flat-Earthers. "You used to run Cognito with JR. I thought you of all people would know that the Earth is hollow, not flat."

"Right. Well, a few years back, I made a bet with JR," Rand explained, "There was no idea so dumb that people couldn't be made to believe it. So I spread the flat Earth theory, and it worked too well. Now, I just egg them on to piss off JR."

"Well, that sounds like a fun distraction for the next 72 hour." Reagan said before pretending to look at her phone. "Oh. An overnight mission? Oh, my goodness. Looks like work all weekend for me."

"And I gotta go too." Eddie said. "JR wants me to assassinate… the governor."

"The governor?" Rand asked. "Well, I guess he has been getting to big for his britches."

"Okay. Well, you stay here warm and cozy. Bye." Reagan said as she left the house with Eddie.

As the two of them left the house, they immediately stepped out of the fake storm hovering over the house and into the sunlight.

"You really think that's going to fool your dad forever?" Eddie asked. "He seems like a smart man."

"The man's brain soaks up alcohol like a sponge. Don't worry." Reagan assured. "In the meantime, you better get changed."

"We better not look like a dumb penguin."


The finishing touches to the wedding were being set up on JR's yacht, the Atlas Shrugged. Onboard, everyone applauded as Tamiko presented herself in front of two ice sculptures of herself.

"Welcome, everyone. Me and I thank you all so much for coming."

After she gave her thanks, she continued walking around the ship to catch up with Reagan. As she did that, Eddie straightened the black tie on his suit trying to comfort himself.

"Ouch."

"Come on, Venom. The suit's not that bad." Eddie said.

"It's not that, Eddie. I was just sifting through your memories and I saw that every wedding you went to, you went with Anne."

Eddie frowned. "Must you bring that up?"

"Sorry. I just thought you would notice that this is the first wedding you've been to where you didn't bring a date."

"I don't care." Eddie said. "This isn't even a proper wedding anyway. Reagan's mom's just doing this to get under Rand's skin."

"Well, whether it's real or not, you do not want to be the first person to leave the wedding alone. That's an admission of loneliness."

"Yeah? And who do you suppose I leave the wedding with?" Eddie asked. "I'm not gay, Gigi's already trying to get one of those muscle grunts, and Reagan's just unbearable. Just look at…"

Eddie stopped himself just as the woman in question passed by going through all the items on her clipboard. He fell silent and stared at Reagan who had her hair down and wore a white dress. He was looking at her in a way that he didn't before.

"Oh, Eddie. Earth to Eddie. WAKE UP, YOU DOLT!"

"Huh? What?" Eddie asked snapping out of it. "Sorry. Don't know what came over me."


Kenny G played the saxophone on the main deck as soon as the wedding started. Reagan waited on the center stage until the musician himself ended his song.

"Thank you, Mr… Uh, G." Reagan said. "Everyone, the ceremony is about to begin."

Everyone turned their attention to Tamiko who presented herself at the back of the aisle. She walked down the carpet and joined Reagan who added in a full-length mirror for her mom.

"Please, please, be seated." Said the actress, Gwyneth Paltrow, as she took the microphone on the stage. "Hello. Most of you know me as Gwyneth Paltrow, but I'm also…" She read her script closely. "'Tamiko's best friend'. Hmm. Hugs."

"That was a little forced." Eddie commented silently.

"Is it just me, or does she look suspiciously like that woman who helps Tony Stark run his company?"

"I OBJECT!"

Everyone gasped and turned around. Rand had ran onto the ship and violently presented himself before everyone.

"Drop the rings and keep your lips where I can see them!"

"Rand?" Eddie asked. "How did you know about the wedding?"

"Reagan left her wedding itinerary in the grocery bag." Rand said. "As soon as I read it, I came here without any hesitation. And I brought some friends."

Suddenly, familiar people climbed up the side of the ship and climbed onboard. They were all wearing flat-Earth gimmick apparel.

"Heads up. We've got virgins onboard."

"You brought the Flat-Earthers?" Reagan asked.

Snap!

Eddie started before looking over at JR's direction. He noticed that the starfish decoration he had on his collar had closed a black circle it once had at its center.

"Um, JR," Eddie said, "What was that?"

"This…" JR said nervously. "This is an Atlantean recording device. Part of our deal with Atlantis was that during our voyages, he'd keep an eye on things to make sure we don't do anything out of line. And I guess since this camera closed, it means that Namor is angry and coming here."

"What?!" Eddie gasped. "What do we do?"

"The only thing we can do is make sure Rand and his idiot crew get off the ship and back to the mainland before he gets here."

"Is eating him an option? Because, you know, I'll gladly do it if it means finally getting rid of that prick."

"You heard him, Dad!" Reagan said. "Namor is coming! You better get out of here before Atlantis declares war on the surface world!"

"Oh, I'll get out of here, all right, but not before I find that groom!" Rand said. "I'm gonna kick his dick in the ass."

"HA! There is no groom, Rand." Tamiko said. "I'm marrying myself to make a statement about empowerment."

"What the… You just did this to get my attention, didn't you? God, that's so stupid, it's sexy."

"You narcissist, trying to make my wedding to myself about you."

"Man. When Reagan said she had an effed-up childhood, she wasn't kidding." Eddie said. "I actually feel bad for her."

"Dad, you have to leave." Reagan said. "For the sake of the world, forget your stupid rivalry with Mom and return to DC."

"Does this mean that we're not going to the edge of the Earth?" Harold asked.

"You actually thought that's what was happening?" Eddie asked.

"Well, we already got a boat to begin our journey." Harold said. "Then, Rand suddenly decided to come with us and even take the wheel."

"Okay, sirs, my dad tricked you." Reagan confessed. "He does not think that the Earth is flat. He was just using you to get to our boat."

Harold looked angrily at Rand. "You lied to us? But we were so close, like the North Pole and the South Pole."

"Is this guy really that thick?" Eddie asked.

"What did you expect? He's showing off his fanny pack like he's proud of it."

"Oh, come on." Rand reprimanded. "You don't actually think the Earth is flat, right?"

"Of course, I do! Why would YouTube lie to me? 'Because that's how they get rich'? I find that hard to believe!"

"Look, you can kill him later, but right now, we're trying to prevent a war." Reagan said. "Tell you what, if you agree to go, then I'll let you in on a secret. The Earth's not flat, but it is hollow. We put this cap on it to keep krakens from eating people's boats."

"ENOUGH!" Harold shouted. "You sphere-mongers have been talking down to us Flat-Earthers for years. Well, no more!" Harold and his comrades opened up their fanny packs and pulled out their guns scaring the guests.

"They got guns?" Rand asked.

"They're adult men who still use chat rooms." Reagan reminded. "Of course they have guns."

"You don't think they'll actually shoot anyone, do you?" Eddie asked.

BANG!

"Judging by the way he treated that bouncer, that'd be a yes."


After shooting the radio and taking the captain's hat, Harold and the Flat-Earthers gathered everyone into the mess hall at gunpoint. They confiscated all their wallets, cell phones, and anything spherical.

"Now, which one of you Illuminatis is gonna tell me where the edge of the Earth is?" Harold threatened the Cognito staff.

"Harold, be reasonable." Reagan pleaded. "The king of Atlantis is on his way here, and if he sees you all, he's going to declare war on the one-quarter of the Earth that isn't his."

"Please, we have guns." Harold returned. "I think we can handle a fish man."

"He's not a fish man! Namor the Sub-Mariner is a highly-trained warrior of the sea who walks through underwater pressure like it was nothing! Bullets aren't going to do shit!"

"Reagan, don't try to reason with him." Eddie said. "These guys wouldn't know the truth if their moms shouted at them from above the basement."

"What was that?" Harold asked pointing his gun at Eddie. "That's it! Someone better take me to the edge of the Earth right now, or a hostage dies ever hour starting with this smart-ass."

"Can I eat him right now, or are you just holding back because there are civilians around us?"

Eddie was nervous until a plan came to his head. He pondered for a minute before finally speaking up to Harold.

"Hey, five o'clock shadow. If you kill me, you'll never get to the Earth's edge."

"What?" Reagan asked.

"You're saying you can take us there?" Harold asked.

"Not exactly, but I know how to get there. It's so easy, you guys can pull it off yourselves." Eddie answered. "But I'd rather not say it in front of everyone. We're the Deep State. We like to keep things confidential."

"So what do you suggest we do about it?" Harold asked.

"Simple. You and your buddies just take me somewhere where no one can hear us, and then, I'll tell you."

"Hmm…" Harold pondered. "All right. But I'm leaving one of my own to shoot your conspiracy-covering friends if you start causing trouble."

"Deal." Eddie agreed before being dragged off by the Flat-Earthers. Just one remained in the ballroom.

"What the hell?" Rand asked. "That guy knows there's no Earth's edge. Is he stupid?"

"For once, Rand, we're in agreement." Tamiko said.

"Hey, leave him alone. He may be a doofus, but he's not that dumb." Reagan said before realizing what she just said. "Wow. I can't believe I just defended Eddie Brock's intelligence."


Eddie was thrown into the study room where he was then surrounded by the Flat-Earthers. Harold stepped up to confront him. But first, he grabbed a spinning globe of the Earth and threw it to the ground.

"Stupid globalist propaganda." Harold said before turning his attention back to Eddie. "Okay, buddy. You said the way to the Earth's edge is simple. Spill your secret."

Eddie sighed. "I can't. There's nothing to spill. You can't get to the Earth's edge because the Earth has no edge."

Harold groaned loudly. "Again? Someone lied!"

"Look, Harold, listen to me." Eddie said. "Things are going to go really badly if you don't do what I say. Just get off this boat, return to the mainland, and finally move on with your lives."

"The only way I'm moving to is the edge of the Earth." Harold insisted.

"Sweet mother of God, is this how Reagan feels being surrounded by people dumber than her?" Eddie asked. "Look. Ships travel around the Earth all the time. If there was an edge of the planet, wouldn't they have fallen off?"

"No. They'd just come out the other side." Harold answered.

"…Say what now?" Eddie asked.

"Everyone knows that when you leave the edge of the Earth on one side, you enter through the other like in Pac-Man." Harold said. "When I get to the edge, I'm going to skip over and land right onto Australia."

Eddie lowered his jaw slowly. He had a hard time trying to find out the appropriate response to the stupid idea he just heard.

"Okay, that settles it. This man is too stupid to let live. Let's just put him out of his misery, Eddie."

"Yeah, okay. I'm tagging you in." Eddie said.

"Tagging who in?" Harold asked.

Suddenly, Eddie closed his eyes and let Venom cover his whole body in symbiote. All the Flat-Earthers yelled and pointed their guns as Venom stood high and proudly between all of them. There was a moment of silence before Venom asked a certain question.

"So how's your health plan?" All the Flat-Earthers screamed and fired rain of bullets which had no effect on Venom. "APPARENTLY, IT'S GREAT!"

With one swing of his claws, Venom had already tore up the chests of half of the Flat-Earthers. The others tried to get away, but Venom pulled them from the door and made quick work of them. In only a matter of ten seconds, only Harold remained in a shaking, cowardly state. Venom grabbed him by his throat and lifted him from his feet.

"You listen very carefully. You keep spouting out this flat-Earth nonsense, and we will find you and eat both your arms, and then both of your legs, and then we will eat your face right off your head. Do you understand? So you will be this armless, legless, faceless thing, won't you, rolling down the street. Like a turd… in the wind. Do you feel me?"

Harold trembling nearly wetting himself. "What the hell are you?"

Venom removed half of his face so he and Eddie could talk together. "We… are Venom." Venom put his face back together. "On second thought…" He lunged to sink his teeth into Harold's head.


The lone Flat-Earther who still had no idea he was all that was left walked around the room doing his job. All of a sudden, a Flat-Earther ran in with his baseball hat covering his face. His comrade joined up with him.

"What happened?"

"I don't know. It all happened quickly. Like a bang…"

BANG!

The ballroom Flat-Earther fell on his back. The one who walked in took of his hat and revealed himself to be none other than Eddie Brock who was then celebrated by the rest of the guests.

"Brock, that was amazing!" Reagan praised. "So you actually took care of the rest of them?"

"Yeah." Eddie said. "And now, for our next step…"


"Oh, come on, honey!" Rand pleaded after he was thrown on a speedboat. "Can't I stay? I need to yell at your mother some more."

"Dad, the longer you stay, the more you risk our world being submerged by the Sub-Mariner. Just get to the mainland before you cause a World War we can't control."

"Yeah! No one likes you, Rand!"

After Reagan started the speedboat, it rode all the way away from the Atlas Shrugged. Rand grumbled to himself on the way, "Stupid Sub-Mariner. He smells like tuna anyway."

Once Reagan was out of sight, Reagan proceeded to return to the aisle to continue her wedding. All of a sudden, the boat started to shake. Everyone was startled at the feeling.

"I thought the Earth wasn't supposed to move until the honeymoon."

In an instant, a big splash popped out of the water in front of the ship. A man came out and landed on the main deck. He was a large, muscular man with short, black hair, tan skin, gold bracers, and black tights.

JR chuckled nervously. "Namor. How unexpected to see you here."

Namor looked around the ship suspiciously. "Where is Rand?"

"Rand?" JR asked barely hiding his fear. "Rand is back at the mainland where he belongs."

"Then why did my device detect Rand Ridley on the ship?" Namor asked.

"Uh, well, funny story that. You see…"

"It was… not the real Rand." Eddie said.

"What?" Namor asked.

"No. It was a… clone. Yes, a clone." Eddie said. "I had Dupli-Kate make one as wedding gift to Tamiko."

"But Tamiko wants nothing to do with Rand." Namor said. "Why would she want a copy of him?"

"Uh… Stress relief." Reagan lied. "Yeah, that's it. She needs something to beat on, and I think we all agree that punching a Rand Ridley look-alike is a lot more relieving than using a punching bag with a picture of him taped on it."

"You're not wrong." Namor said. "Tamiko, on behalf of Atlantis, I wish your… strange marriage to be strong."

"Thank you, your majesty." Tamiko replied.

Namor turned back to the sea and jumped off of it. As soon as he disappeared into the ocean, everyone sighed in deep relief.

"Oh, great. Now, I want fish-sticks."

"Crisis averted." Reagan said. "No more Flat-Earth pirates, no more dad, no more political incidents. Time to finish this day off."

Reagan walked up to the podium and looked over at her mother while everyone watched.

"Mom, do you take you to be your bride, to have and to hold, in sickness and in health, for as long as you… both shall live?"

"I do." Tamiko answered.

"By the power vested in me by the Deep State, I know pronounce you spiritually renewed. You may kiss the… you."

Tamiko proceeded to hug herself and make kissing sounds into the air. Everyone was a little unnerved just seeing that, but in the end, they still clapped and applauded.


As the sun began to set, Eddie lounged on the railing of the deck with a drink in his hand.

"Oh, cheer up, Eddie. You killed pirates. You saved a wedding. You prevented a war. And with all the damage the pirates did to the yacht, JR can collect on its insurance. Figured you'd be more excited by now."

"Yeah… I don't know." Eddie said blankly. "Maybe I should just…"

"No. Do not say 'leave for home early'. That's the last thing you want to say. That's loser talk."

"Then what do you suggest I do, Venom? I'm basically the only wallflower here."

"Not the only one." Reagan said lounging next to Eddie with a drink also in her hand.

"Reagan?" Eddie asked. "Why aren't you excited? Sure, you dad nearly ruined everything, but you still have time to catch your vacation flight."

"No, I don't." Reagan said. "I just learned that the flat-balled flat-heads destroyed the ship's engines. JR called the mainland for help, but their ETA is too late. I'm gonna miss my flight by an hour because my dad brought a bunch of gun-swinging idiots to yell at my mom." She pulled out her plane tickets and ripped them off before tossing them at sea.

"Jesus. Sorry to hear that." Eddie said.

"Just my luck, huh?" Reagan asked taking a sip of her drink. "Together or divorced, my mom and dad make my life a living hell. If they could almost cause a war with Atlantis, it's no wonder I ended up as such a mess."

Eddie thought for a moment before speaking up. "Actually, you're not as much of a mess as you think you are. Granted, you are a mess, but considering how your parents are, you could have been way worse."

"You really think so?" Reagan asked.

"Of course. If anyone's a major mess here, it's me. You saw my childhood. You saw how my dad beat me just because of what happened to my mom. It's no wonder I ended up as such a loser."

"Hey, hey, hey. You are not a loser, Brock." Reagan assured. "Not gonna lie, you're not exactly a winner, but look at everything you've done. You killed an entire pirate crew. You stopped us from going to war with Atlantis. If that's not a win, there's no hope for any of us."

Eddie chuckled and took a sip of his drink. "I guess you have a point there. So since your flight to Bora-Bora's been canceled, what's your plan now?"

Reagan thought for a minute before answering, "You know, earlier, my mom encouraged me to start serving myself. I think it's about time I starting doing something I want."

"Sounds like a plan. I think I'll do the same." Eddie said. He held out his drinking glass. "To whatever we want."

"To whatever we want." Reagan repeated returning with her own glass. They each took a long sip of their drinks.


The sunlight hurt Eddie's eyes when he stirred himself awake. At first, everything was blurry, but when he regained his vision, he found himself in a hotel bedroom. After a bit of moving around, he realized how naked he was under the sheets.

Thinking how strange it was how he got there, he then realized that there was someone sharing the bed with him. He turned himself to see who it was. It was a woman who was also naked under the sheets. But as soon as she opened her eyes to look at Eddie, he suddenly widened his realizing who it was.

The woman was Reagan Ridley.

Immediately after recognizing each other, Eddie and Reagan yelled jumping out of the bed.

"AAAAAAAHHHHHHHHH!"

"WHAT THE EFF ARE YOU DOING, BROCK?!"

"ME?! WHAT ABOUT YOU, RIDLEY?!"

"HEY! I ASKED FIRST! NAKED!"

"YOU'RE NAKED TOO!" Eddie gasped. "Wait! Something's coming back to me."

"Oh, my God! Me too!" Reagan gasped. "I think we… Oh, no, no, no, no! Eddie, tell me we didn't…"

At that moment, Venom's head slithered out of Eddie's shoulder with a big smile on his face.

"Oh, yeah. You did. Nice job, both of you."

Eddie and Reagan looked at each other suddenly remembering everything they did to one another.

"AAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHH!"