Mistakes
Chapter 11
Mike was regretting his decision within just a day or so, but he figured he had made Maddie mad, so there was no go back. He missed Molly far more than he thought he would. It was funny how quickly she had wormed her way into his heart. He almost missed the feeling of belonging somewhere. Of having something of a home. His apartment was a sore replacement.
He hadn't bothered getting checked out. If he had a concussion, it wasn't his first. He was more worried about Molly being okay. Thankfully, Maddie did text him, letting him know that Molly was perfectly fine. He didn't respond but he was glad the precious baby was alright. In the month that followed, friends tried to convince Mike to contact Molly, but Mike resisted. He had sent a check to Maddie, hoping that helped.
He had also quietly retired. Emotionally, he couldn't handle any more and his body was a mess after being shot. There was little chance he would fully recover. He had bought a farm, complete with a recently renovated farmhouse. In the back of his mind, he imagined Molly growing up there, even though he'd burnt that bridge. One day, he was going though some home décor store, trying to find towels, when he seen Maddie several yards away, completely unaware of his presence. He thought about avoiding her, but she had Molly with her and she was tugging on his heart strings. Mike just wasn't sure he could walk away again.
"Maddie?" Mike asked as he approached her. She turned around and gave him a smile.
"Mike, its good to see you. We've missed you." Maddie said.
"I missed you all too." Mike admitted as he tickled Molly's belly. He wanted to hold her, but Molly was making no moves of getting her out of the car seat.
"I heard you had retired. Bored yet?" Maddie asked.
"A little. I bought a house too. I'm trying to find towels, actually." Mike said.
"Aisle four." Maddie said simply.
"Thanks. I miss her." Mike admitted.
"Mike; I can't let you in and out of her life. Either stay in or don't. Right now; she is little and doesn't know what is happening, but as she gets older, she will and I don't want her to know your rejection. I understand you went through hell and you miss your older kids. What happened that night could have happened to me just as easily, but you didn't do it intentionally. I know that. I know how much you love her and I want her to have that relationship with you. I just can't have you rejecting her. I know you will never get over the grief concerning your older kids and they will always hold a very special place in your heart. You blame yourself for their deaths. But Molly is a reality. Don't close yourself off completely." Maddie said. He was surprised by her directness, but she did have a point.
"I am so scared to lose her." Mike admitted.
"I get that, but that doesn't mean you should exclude yourself from her life. You deserve happiness. Love. Even if you don't think you do. You are welcome to her anytime you want, but if you make the decision to be involved, do yourself, her and everyone else the favor of not walking back out. She doesn't need the emotional roller-coaster and if you do it again, the chances of me letting you around her will become less and less." Maddie answered.
"I understand." Mike said.
"She can't replace your kids but she can make things a bit brighter. There will still be tough days but she'll give you a reason to smile again. Just give it some thought. You know where I am." Maddie said before rolling her cart away. Mike could get mad for her being so direct, but she had a point, as hard as it was to face. Molly deserved having a fully present dad. Not one hung up on people that had died years before.
