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Chapter Twenty:
Charles Xavier sat in the kitchen, with Ororo, Hank, Logan, Scott and Jean, shortly after the students had left for school. Given the amount of students the institute had, breakfast was taken in stages on weekdays. Logan was sitting by the window reading the paper. Hank was across from him, passing Ororo the plate of pancakes as Scott and Jean were going over their newest lesson plan for the younger students. Charles sipped his cup of Earl Grey, staring out the window contemplating, as he often did, what to do about Magneto.
His old friend has been noticeably absent from the danger room session this morning and now breakfast. His senses told him, that Magneto had not yet left his room. More than likely, Magneto was waiting for him to reach out to him.
'I clearly saw Magnus teaching here,' he recalled. 'Despite our differences, I had always hoped I could convince him to join us and together work towards our shared goal. But given the situation with Rogue, it seems it's only a matter of time before I'll have to ask him to leave. Perhaps, what I saw within apocalypse's mind isn't set in stone,' he thought before glancing over at Jean. 'For her sake, I hope's that true.'
The image of her losing control of her powers, engulfed by flames, weighted heavily on his mind. Another decision he has been sitting on, for nearly a month now, whether to tell Jean about his vision. His indecisiveness wasn't sitting well with him but there were factors to consider.
'She's already so frightened of her powers and their growth. Telling her I witnessed her worst fear come to life, may very well, cause it to happen,' he thought as he placed his tea cup on its saucer. 'I don't want to hide anything from her. However, if the truth will only worsen matters, perhaps it's for the best,' he thought. It only took him a moment to realize that Rogue had made a similar argument yesterday.
He supposed it hadn't been the secrecy of Magneto's confession that had bothered him but the affect all of this seemed to have on his old friend. He knew he had to worry about Rogue's safety, the past stalking for starters, yet he was equally as worried for Magnus' state of mind. Rogue had not told him the whole story that much was apparent.
'Magnus won't tell me either,' he thought to himself, 'Rogue has ensured that.'
"Charles?" he heard a voice say. He looked up at Hank. "Pancake?" he asked.
"Oh, no, thank you, Hank. I'm don't have much of an appetite this morning," he said.
"Are you okay, Professor?" Jean asked.
"I'm alright. I'm just debating a decision," he said.
"Anything we can help with?" Scott asked.
"Normally, I would say yes," he sighed. "There is a situation between two of the residents of this house. It's troubling, very troubling, but deeply personal in nature. As much as I'd like to ask for advice, I can't do so without breaking their confidences," he said.
"That's certainly a dilemma," Hank commented.
"Indeed," Charles said.
"Can you give ask us for advice, without disclosing who you're talking about?" Ororo asked.
"Maybe change enough details where we can help, but not enough to betray anyone's trust?" Hank added.
"Yeah, that never ends well," Logan piped up from behind his paper. "Once you start talking about something, someone's gonna put two and two together," he said.
"That's my concern," Charles said. "There aren't many details about this situation that can be altered," he said.
"Is anyone in danger?" Ororo asked.
"Physically no, not at the moment, not unless I take a certain course of action, which is what I need to decide," Charles said.
"If an action would put one of own in danger, why consider it?" Hank asked.
"I'm afraid, there are complications. There was a threat in the past that I wasn't made aware until last night. I still don't know the full details of it. From what has been explained to me, my past ignorance was necessary to keep the situation from escalating past-"
"Like I said," Logan said as he folded the paper, "someone's gonna put two and two together," he said as he put the paper on the table. "Chuck, let's talk outside," he said as he stood up.
"Are you certain were speaking about the same issue?" Charles asked as he started to move out from the table and Logan moved to the open the back door.
"Yeah, I'm sure," he said, before walking outside.
A few minutes later, Charles sat with Logan in the back yard. Logan had taken a seat on one of the stone benches.
"I'm guessing Magneto's the one who fessed up about it," he said as he crossed his arms over his chest.
"Yes, yes he was," Charles said. "How long have you known about this?" he asked.
"Too long," Logan said. "I caught of whiff of him outside her room about a year back," he said.
"A year?" Charles exclaimed. "You've known about this for over a year?" he asked in disbelief.
"Yeah," he said begrudgingly. "Never sat right with me, Chuck, but Rogue asked me to keep it quiet. She said anyone trying to help would only make it worse," he said.
"Rogue, more or less, said the same to me last night," Charles said.
"Yeah, I don't like it any more than you do, but Rogue's old enough to make her own choices. If she wants to play with fire, that's her call," he said.
"I'm worried about him, as well. I've-," Charles said, more to himself than the man sitting in front of him.
"What?" Logan growled as he stood up. "That pervert stalked her for over a year and you're worried about him?" Logan asked infuriated. Charles eyes widened.
"Pervert?" Charles asked, his eyes widening with realization. "It's sexual?" Charles asked in disbelief. "Rogue said she wanted to be his friend. He said the same thing," Charles said. Logan let out a low growl, his hands balled.
"Course, she didn't tell you that part," Logan said aggravated.
"What part?" Charles asked. Logan shook his head. "Logan, please," he pleaded.
"Ain't my secret to tell, Chuck," he said. Charles held his fingers to the bridge of his nose. "What I can tell you is its mutual," Logan said. Charles looked up at Logan again. "Whatever it is that's going on between them, they're both into it. Not really my place to judge," Logan added.
"Do you think I should ask him to leave?" Charles asked.
"Rogue knew you would try to put yourself in the middle of it, 'cause he's your friend and all," he said. "They're both adults. If they wanna be idiots, let 'em," Logan said.
Charles sat in his office, a little past 3pm, as he considered Logan's advice. Sensing Rogue's presences he turned him attention to the door.
"Come in," he called out as he made his way over to the small couch in the middle of his office.
"Hi, Prof," Rogue said as she entered the room. She closed the door behind her and came to take a seat on the couch, placing her backpack next to her.
"How are you doing, today?" he asked her. "I was worried when you requested not to participate in the danger room session this morning," he added. "Are you feeling alright?" he asked.
"I'm okay," she answered quickly, a little too quickly. "I just wanted the morning off, is all," she said. Something told him there was more to it than she was letting on. "How are you?" she asked.
"I'm fine, concerned about this situation, of course, but fine," he said.
"Are you gonna let him stay? He hasn't really done anything wrong since he got here," she said.
"Aside from being obsessed with a teenager in my care?" Charles asked with a raised eyebrow.
"I appreciate your concern, Prof, but I'm over eighteen," she said defensively. "You can't forbid me from talking to someone," she said.
"I can, however, forbid certain activities from taking place within the walls of my school," he said. Rogue eyed him for a moment, a curious expression on her face.
"Talked to Logan, huh?" she asked as she leaned back on the couch, folding her leg over the other.
"Yes," he said, surprised by the guess. "So, it's true, then. Your relationship with Magneto is sexual?" he asked.
"That's just part of it," she said dismissively.
"Making peace with an enemy I can understand. Even forgiving someone for past transgressions and moving past it. However, wanting to be with someone who has stalked you. This I don't understand," he said.
"Huh?" she huffed. "And here I thought you'd be the only one to get it," she said.
"What do you mean?" he asked.
"Magneto has, not once, but twice assembled a team to directly oppose the X-Men. He's set goals that contradicts the X-Men's mission. Manipulated all of us to expose Mutants to world, making our lives so much harder. He's plotted against and attacked you so many times. He's been your enemy for years. Despite all of it, he's still one of your oldest, closest friends. He's done terrible things and you still like him," she said. "Despite it all, I still like him too," she said.
"I see," Charles said as he looked away from her, considering her words. "However-" he started to say.
"If after everything's he's done," she started, interrupting him, "he's worthy of your friendship, then he's also worthy of my affection. Now that you've offered him redemption, you don't get to make up a limit to what type of relationship he allowed to have," she said.
"Alright, alright," he said, conceding the issue. "His age-" he started to say.
"Doesn't bother me," Rogue said. "And mine doesn't bother him. I don't feel young to him, he doesn't feel old to me. We're adults, if neither of us care about the age difference, then it's none of anyone else's damn business," she said. She looked away from her a moment, as he gathered his thoughts. She was making good points, but something still didn't feel right to him.
"However-" he started to say. She let out an annoyed huff.
"Charles," she said annoyed, his widened eyes snapped to hers. She had never called him by his first name before. "Eric's so worried about you kicking him out, that he ain't gonna say this to you, so this is on me. I wanna make something very clear to you, Charles. I ain't asking your permission to date him. He's sure as hell ain't asking for yours. We're adults. We do not need your approval to be together. The reason we're having this conversation, is 'cause he's your friend, and I know you're worried about him. In this conversation," she said pointing between them, "you are not acting as leader of the X-Men. If you were that would be highly inappropriate. You can't use your position as head of the school, to try and dictate the interpersonal relationships of two of its members. That is not okay," she said strongly.
"This is a school with children-"
"We're not gonna go around the institute, holding hands, kissing, flaunting our relationship. We're been involved for over a week and you didn't know until today. You think I wanna be the topic of the institute's gossip? No, course, I don't. We'll continue to be discreet," she finished.
Charles held his fingers to the bridge of his nose.
"Then speaking as his friend, which is apparently the only capacity that I am allowed to object upon, you're playing mind games with him," he said.
"Because he loves them," Rogue said. "He is having fun," she said.
"He wasn't having fun last night," Charles pointed out.
"Because you put yourself in the middle of our relationship by trying to dictate how we're allowed to interact with each other," she said. "It's not that a relationship between an older man and a younger woman is frowned upon. You don't approve, so, you're trying to correct our behavior. We don't need correcting," she said.
"He's different around you. He's not himself. He's been-"
"Vulnerable?" she asked.
"Yes," he said.
"I know," she said.
"Which you said was about your survival," he pointed out.
"That's not-" she cut herself off. "This is none of your business," she yelled. She took a moment to rest her forehead in her hand, before raking her hand through her hair. "Okay, okay fine. You're not gonna be satisfied until you understand this better. So, I will explain it to you. But this conversation, is between us. You do not repeat anything I tell you to Magneto. Understand, Charles? I'm only telling you this, if you promise me that this conversation doesn't leave this room," she said strongly.
"You have my word," Charles said.
"Okay, okay," she said before taking a deep breath. She looked away from him for a moment, collecting her thoughts. He sat patiently for her to be ready to speak. "You know how tight lipped he is about his past," Rogue started to say.
"Yes," he said with a raised eyebrow.
"He is so influenced by everything's that happened to him. He's been through unspeakable amounts of trauma that you have no reference for. You wouldn't understand it, even if he did try to tell you. Maybe even show you. It ain't the same as living through it," Rogue said.
"You have not lived through it either," he pointed out.
"I didn't just start looking through his memories for fun. All of the horrible things that happened to him, popped up in my nightmares. You remember what it was like, when I first came to the institute, after I absorbed Mystique, night after night same nightmare about Kurt. Times that by a thousand and that's what I was dealing with Magneto's past. I had no control over that," she said frustrated.
"Why didn't you come to me for help? That's why you're here," he said upset.
"I couldn't," she exclaimed "How do you not get this yet?" she asked annoyed before letting out a sigh. "He was watching me, Charles. I didn't know when or where. I didn't see him stalking me. I never saw him. The copy of Magneto I had in my head told me he was watching me. If- If I had talked to you about him, a day, a week, even a month after I absorbed him. If I had started getting extra help with my powers, started getting sessions with you, it would've been this huge red flag for Magneto. He would've known something was up. He wouldn't felt he had to check on me to be sure I wasn't a threat. Charles, I was a threat to him," she said strongly. "He was our enemy then and he would have treated like me one," she said.
"I only had one person I could ask for help: the copy of Magneto in my head," she said continued. "Can you imagine that? The source of your fear being your only hope for salvation?" she asked exasperated. She didn't pause long enough for him to answer. "The consciousness, the fragment of Magneto in my head, had his own hangs up about it. He didn't ask me to absorb him. He felt just as trapped as I did. So, he made a choice and offered to help me with my powers. I didn't see any other option and took him up on it," she explained.
"We started talking, about- well about everything. The nightmares kept coming and sometimes I just needed some contexts. He'd explain things, show me stuff from his past. I'd made comments and we would laugh and cry together," she said with a smile. "He had never rewatched his own memories before. I mean, how many people get a chance to do that? I offered a new point of view on some things and along the way, he started getting closure about some of it. During all of that, we formed this bond," she said. "I want to help him get that same closure," she said.
"What is doesn't work? What if he doesn't become who you think he should be?" Charles asked.
"I'm not-" she started to say before sighing. "He's already the man he needs to be," she said surprising him.
"Then what is the point of recreating conversations?" Charles asked. She let out a sigh. "The bond may not be the same one you're remember," he said.
"I wasn't expecting it to be the same. I- You haven't listened to a word I've-" she started to say aggravated before cutting herself off. "I know it's not gonna be the same. That's impossible. He's not this disembodied voice in my head that helped me 'cause he had nothing else to do. Magneto, the real Magneto, offered to help me with my powers the first time we talked about them," she said with a smile. "I don't want it to be the same, I want it to be better. An actual relationship. Giving him closure about his past, that part, that ain't about me. It's for him. Closure doesn't erase trauma, Prof, it helps you live with it," she explained.
"I- I don't know what to say to that."
"Then I'm gonna go do my homework," she said, grabbing her bag, as she stood up. "Come find me if you need me to repeat myself again," she said before quickly leaving the room.
Thank you for reading! Okay Xavier chapter over! Please let me know your thoughts :)
Little Red Dove: Hi! Yay, I'm glad you're enjoying it! I'm not sure how long I'll be able to keep up this writing pace. I'm going to keep going as long as it's fun to write!
I hope the other writer on Tumblr starts writing again :) It would be great to have some new stuff (I didn't write myself) to read! Thank you so much for the words of encouragement!
Till next time!
