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What's in a Name?

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The new Criminalist Magus made his way over to Wee Timid Beasties.

Luna, feeding the bunnies, which of course involved a lot of petting, looked up and burst into tears.

Harry, feeling her distress, popped quickly to her side. Seeing an unknown person in the Keep when the wards had recently been upgraded, had him only pulling his wand and not turning the unknown person into a fine ground hamburger for the thestrals.

Stepping in front of his blonde future bride, he challenged the wizard.

"What do you want, here? Are you lost? This is a place of peace."

The man paled and put up his hands. "I just wanted to buy a few more cats, that's all."

"Luna, is there a problem with this man buying cats?"

Luna, whose tears had been reduced to sniffles at Harry's appearance, were back, and they brought reinforcements in the form of weeping, wailing, and he was sure he heard teeth gnashing.

Apparently, Hermione did too and was offering comfort and a dental mouth guard for the girl.

Giving up on that source of information for the moment, he put a comforting arm around her and speared the stranger with a look.

"I'm just taking them back to my lab. Everyone has to have a hobby, after all."

Luna objected to that. "Lab experiments! Lab experiments! If I hadn't interfered with you enclosing those little kitties in a… They could have…" She stuttered to a stop; too upset to continue.

"YOU! You're the reason why I need new cats!" The stranger accused.

Madam Rosier, alerted to the need for an adult by the Luna Distress Alert System (patent pending) came over and also gave the newcomer a cold, Scottish-winter-like welcome.

"I've returned yer gold already sir, as the cats mysteriously reappeared here. I sent it via HEE (House Elf Express**). Did you not receive it? Elves don't steal."

The man huffed. "I did, which is why I am here. I didn't mean to upset your little friend. I just need the felines."

Harry pointed his wand threateningly at the man "Who are you?"

"I'm the new criminalist, CM Schrodinger, at your service." The wizard shared.

Hermione's hair nearly turned Medusa-like again. She hadn't been this angry in quite some time.

"Schrodinger? Schrodinger? OUT! OUT!" Hermione turned to Harry and explained what she knew about a man with that name and his supposed cat experiments.

Harry was now being bombarded by anger from both ladies, and now his own sense of outrage was engaged.

"Sir, I don't think that you're going to be a good fit for this organization. Why don't you pack yourself in your box to do experiments." Harry suggested.

"You can't fire me! I have a contract. I don't care who you are or who your parents are!"

Harry, though, had summoned security, and BloodRage not only wore his old blood-spattered armor, he brought a war hammer.

Harry might be godfather to his little princess, but at this moment? He loved this goblin.

"This man wants to buy Mrs Figgs kittens and put them in a box. A box!"

BloodRage had a soft spot for the elderly squib that had been kind to an orphan, one that had ignored the orders of a dark lord to do so. To disrespect her like this? No.

BloodRage looked at the wizard and took out a strange device.

"What's that?"

"Oh, something goblin guards use to measure people for the free pine box they earn when they Make. Me. Angry!"

"I don't know what I did wrong, but I apologize. I think I'd better go talk to my supervisor. Oh, lad, what was your name, please?"

"Potter, Harry Potter." Hermione chimed, her hair starting to calm down. "Might I suggest that you use rats or something that are pests in your future experiments?"

Luna piped up. "That or find some of the Death Eaters that might have survived. That way there's no loss."

The man left the shop totally bewildered. He had been told that his relationship with his grandfather would be ignored here. That he could have a fresh start!

Who would have thought that his hobby of putting kittens into a huge box to paint them while they were playing would cause such a fuss!

His largest customer used to live in England. He actually hadn't heard from her in quite some time. But surely, painting playful kittens on little plates wasn't evil.

Was it?

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**Thank you, Sinyk for "HEE"! - borrowed without permission.

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