"Food's here!" Jesse called to Darling as she took the thin, plastic bags to the console table in her living room. Eating in the dining room was always too formal for her liking. She had spent more time sitting on motel beds and couches.

"Be there in a moment!"

Darling emerged from the spare room wearing a fresh T-shirt and a loose-fitting pair of tan slacks. He and the bathroom were spotless.

Jesse beckoned him to join her on the leather couch.

She already had the chopsticks stabbing through the takeout containers. It had been a long stressful day and she was starving. Using her abilities required calories, and she had a monstrous deficit from reclaiming the research sector.

She handled the Hiss pocket and had to spend the rest of the day dealing with the fallout. A few employees were injured, but that was an expected part of the job. They all had signed the waivers. No one in that sector died (no one who wasn't already Hiss-tainted from the initial breach anyway), the machinery was back to working order, and the situation was contained. She was too exhausted to think about the details; they would deal with that tomorrow

She and the doctor had planned to relax at her apartment. She wanted to spend time with him outside of the house. Life could be more than work. That's what she needed and that's what they were going to do. The house would still be standing when her alarm rang in the morning.

Today was a standard day for her – well, minus Darling's impromptu request for a haircut. She found a reserve of energy for that. That was different; Darling never ceased to surprise her. That was one of the myriads of things she liked about him. Jessed huffed, uncoiling her muscles. Honestly, he had been the only good part of her day. He threw the occasional kiss or report her way, not bombs or shards of impending death.

The doctor settled into the cushion next to her. His presence felt more natural to her than his absence now. They'd spent countless hours working together since his mysterious reappearance. Jesse had grown more than fond of the doctor. It was Jesse who found him months ago: butt naked in the middle of the Oceanview motel lobby, face down, semi- unconscious and delirious. When she rolled him over to check if he was alive, he roused and his pupils dilated unnaturally to greet her. They were happy black holes overtaking the landscape of his eyes. He didn't know who she was, or who he was, or where they were - but he was alive, and he wouldn't cease his incomprehensible babbling. Whatever he was saying it was enthusiastic and it wasn't English. Jesse didn't recognize him at first, without the sterile white coat or his owlish glasses, but she recognized his voice and that smile from his videos across the FBC. She knew that voice; it was the alluring tenor of Casper Darling, ex head of research. She half-expected to hear the familiar tone preceding a video presentation. She had followed his presentations through the house like bread crumbs. Not that she would have left him in the hotel otherwise, but knowing the name of the odd, naked man snapped Jesse's brain into action. She hastily wrapped him up in a sheet and levitated him back to the bureau. He passed out on the way back. When the scientists questioned him about the incident 3 days later, he had no recollection, but Jesse did. Jesse couldn't forget the image of his firm, naked ass.

Darling awoke to his previous disposition, intelligent as ever albeit a bit grumpy. He had a constant headache. Upon examination his vitals were otherwise normal. When Jesse went to cross examine him, she expected to harbor resentment for the man. She spent the entire interview trying not to think about his naked ass. She plunged a hand in reaching for anger, and a fist full of arousal and something else surfaced. She didn't know what to make of it. They both left that encounter confused, but he accepted a position as a consultant.

Jesse knew it probably was not the best idea to engage in a relationship with her employee – a man who was 20 years older than her, who was involved in the abduction of her brother, who had engaged in some ethically-questionable science in the pursuit of knowledge – but Jesse pursued it anyway. She wanted to dislike the man, really, she did. She dreamt of locking him in Dylan's old cell, making him her prisoner. She tried, but the bastard was too damn charming; his smile was too disarming, and his knowledge of the bureau was essential. It did not help that her ideations of vengeance deviated to bondage. He invaded her thoughts and her office with his inquiries, often offering a cup of dark coffee as payment for his intrusion. The man had a caffeine problem, but who was she to judge? It wasn't long before he became a comforting presence. He was perhaps the only one who understood her connection to Polaris on a personal level. Hedron had vanished, but it had bonded with Darling. He was affected in a way she could relate to, was more attuned to the paranatural than the average person. He gravitated to her/Polaris and she grew to appreciate his orbiting. When their stars aligned one routine evening, her mouth eclipsed his, and they opened a door to a threshold of their own.

"Thanks. Good choice on the beef and broccoli." Jesse spit out, between bites of her food. She was too hungry for manners.

"It's the least I could do." Darling offered as he grabbed another scoop of rice to balance his sweet and sour pork.

The only thing he had to eat today was coffee, if that counts, and that was 10 hours ago. He was too shaken up to think the about food after breakfast.

"Excuse me" Jesse burped as she set her container down to breathe.

Jesse eyed Darling as he continued to chew. He looked lost in his thoughts, though not as distant as earlier today. Jesse words lassoed him back to reality.

"So, this 'not'", she air quoted with her fingers, "midlife crisis of yours, is it part of a new experiment you've yet to tell me about?"

Darling stopped chewing as Jesse sat up to re-examine her work up close.

"Not that I mind, being your personal stylist…but you could do better in the future?" She shrugged.

Darling chewed on her words.

"Why the urgency? Couldn't it have waited till tomorrow?" She pressed him.

Darling continued to look down at his fried pork.

"Not that I did a bad job". she grazed her fingers over the back of his head affectionally. "Even without that mane of yours, you're still a catch." He was never much of a lion to begin with, always struck her as more of an exotic bird: constantly squawking, fluttering about, and perching on her shoulder. He had half a head on her, height wise.

His lips perked up at her comment and her touch. He transferred a couple more bites of protein to his mouth.

"Don't think of losing the goatee, though," Jesse warned. "Or I might have to fire you."

She leered dramatically. "For traumatizing your boss."

A chuckled percolated in his chest. That's where she draws the line.

"I can only handle so much." The little whiskers were a prerequisite component of his Darlingness. She enjoyed the scratch of his facial hair on her skin.

"I'll keep that in mind" he noted, swallowing a chuckle and another chunk of fried, sauce-covered pepper.

He owed her an explanation for interrupting their evening. He can't give her his instinctual response. 'Because I love you, and I can't correct all my fuckups'. No that wouldn't do, and ' Oh, you see, Jesse, I had an emotional crisis, from the sight of your blood in my hair, because when I looked at it, all I could see was your pain and my inadequacy, and I couldn't take it.' doesn't quite roll off the tongue.

Darling had experienced enough failed relationships to know what not to say in this situation. He wouldn't burden her with that knowledge, and it wasn't fair to ask her to return his sentiment. He had observed her from the astral plane and was transfixed by her before they even shook hands. It was never his intention to fall in love with her, and he never imagined that she would express interest in him. That she would kiss him, that she would proposition him. He was perfectly content to be 'Casper the friendly ghost,' her guide through the Oldest House. It was enough for him to love her from afar, and whatever their relationship was now, it was enough. He wouldn't ask for anything from her in that regard. Any love she offered him was a gift. Either way he would kneel at her altar to serve her. She was a heavenly beacon, and her glow alone sustained him.

He still owed her an answer.

"Yes, I suppose my hair is part of an experiment." Darling said cautiously.

His hypothesis: One misguided man can change from the head down, for the woman he adores.

"I'm in the testing phase right now."

"Am I a part of it?" Jesse asks

He would like to keep her in the blind group.

"Absolutely. You are an important variable. Couldn't be done without you."

"Really? Must be terribly important to interrupt our date night." She doesn't want to talk about work, but this is blurring that line. "Does it deal with your interdimensional research or Polaris?" she asks.

"Not quite." How does he tell her this?

"Have you devised a new HRA headset or some sort of amplifier thing?" She hoped the buzzcut was only for the prototype he was testing and that it wasn't going to become part of the FBC uniform.

"No. The large scale HRAs, when functioning within analytical parameters, oscillating at the median established point, should keep the-" he doesn't want to go off on a tangent, "No. This is a more, ah, a personal study."

"About..." She trails off, not knowing where he is going with this.

She is not making this easy. He offers a weak explanation, " I'm turning my vast analytical abilities to a more introspective position."

Jesse has that cross look on her face. He tries again.

"I had to alter my physical appearance," she nods. "To align with my mental shift."

"What do you mean, Casper?" She's not getting it. "What shift?" He seemed off from his experience this morning, but he told her he was fine. She was fine. Everything was fine.

Darling placed his half-eaten food on the table. His hands twitched to talk. He didn't want to go there but he didn't know how else to explain.

"It's fuzzy, my memories from being in the astral plane, but I watched you fight the Hiss before." A mixture of awe and trepidation blanketed his words "You're brutally effective to observe. I thought Northmore was something, but you're in a class all your own—." He tried to swallow the lump in his throat. "I've never seen the action up close, never seen the danger first hand." His eyes were distant. "I know being the director is a dangerous position, working for the FBC is on the frontier of discovery- the unknown territory has its risks." The lump was still stuck in his larynx. "And that you chose to pick up the service weapon, Jesse, but as incredibly special, as gifted as you are, you're still made of flesh and bone. You can still bleed; you can still die."

"It was a scratch, Darling. I'm fine." She reassured him.

"It was a gash. I helped you with the stiches!" his hands were thrown before him for proof. "If you weren't there, I might have died – and I can live with that." She frowned at him, that didn't make sense, but he continued, "What I can't abide is your blood on my hands, Jesse. You would never have been in that position, if not for me."

"It was an accident, Casper. Really, I'm fine." Jesse clasped his closest hand in hers.

The doctor buried his face in his palm. He couldn't do this.

"How many close calls have you had, Jesse, fighting a foe I helped unleash? And what have I done to aide you? What can I do to aide you?" he spoke between his agitated fingers, as they climbed to his forehead.

"You've made some poor decisions…I'm not going to say you haven't. If circumstances were different and I met you before I became Director, I would punch you in the face." He didn't doubt that she would break his nose, but he would let her beat the shit out him if it made her feel better. "But I don't hold that against you, now."

Jesse gave his hand a sneeze.

"I'm still trying to process it all. I won't say I forgive you for all that you've done, but I like your face too much to punch it now."

Jesse released his hand to caress his cheek.

"I'm not ok with how you treated my brother, but he's always been a challenge to deal with. What's done is done, Casper."

He's not asking for her forgiveness. He knows he can't.

"This job has been infinitely more enjoyable with you at my side," she adds. "Let's leave it at that."

Silence pooled around them like the incoming tide while Darling pondered her admission. It waned as the doctor spoke. He didn't know how else to say it.

"I couldn't wash your blood out of my hair, Jesse, no matter how hard I scrubbed."

Jesse ceased biting at her pinky.

"Did you cut your hair, because of me, Casper?" She peered intensely.

Darling turned his body to face her fully. His eyes were glossy, brimming with frantic contrition.

"I had to do something!" He blurted out, attempting to run his fingers through his phantom curls.

"There is no combination of letters in the human scope of language to form an apology adequate enough for my failures in your life. I...I couldn't stand the sight of myself, Jesse."

So, he decided to shave his head? Makes perfect sense...Idiot. Jesse raised her hands to clasp them behind his ears. She observed her offering. He seemed so exposed before her.

What a strangely selfless gesture , she can't think of anyone who's done something like that for her before. She's touched. He may have contributed to the bureau's problems, but he's done all he can to fix them. She won't blame him; she can't blame the man before her now.

"Casper, it's not your fault, and you didn't have to..." Jesse tried.

"It was an experiment to see if I could change," His eyes fell to his lap. He couldn't look at her "…for you." His wounded expression made her chest ache.

It was her turn to comfort him.

Like a pocket dimension phasing from existence, Jesse collapsed the space between them, drawing him into an embrace. She held him on her couch until Darling melted into her arms. They sat in the quiet hum of Polaris as Jesse traced circles into the whisps of his hair with her fingers, until their breathing synchronized. He didn't need to say anything else.

Minutes passed as Jesse continued to drag her fingers over his scalp until she broke their bubble with a confession.

"You know, I wasn't completely on board with this haircut initially, but after giving it some thought," she stops to kiss his cheek. "I think I love it," she propped herself up to her whisper into his ear, "and I love the man responsible".

She could feel his uncontainable smile. Resuming her seated position, she pressed a finger to his lips before he could respond, "I know, Darling, you don't need to say anything."

She handed him his container of fried food and nestled into his side. Yes, this is exactly what she needed.