Addison's POV
I got to Joe's bar, soon As I enter I spotted Callie, Arizona, and Christina sitting at one of the tables. I went to them, and Callie notices me approaching and shouted my name.
"Addie!" Callie shouted
"Oh my god you're already drunk, Christina are you drunk too?" I desperately ask
"Little bit" she responded trying to sound sober with her pointer finger and thumb coming close gesturing her "little bit" but she's also drunk but not like Callie.
"Why? What's wrong Addison?" Arizona asked
"It has been a crazy day, what happened at lunch today than before I went home, Kai-"
"Yeah, it was crazy. Two super hot women fighting over you... oh! I mean the seat" Christina cuts me off, I glare at her
"Shut up junkie, continue Adds," Arizona said
"As I was saying, when I was about to go home I saw Kai in the locker room changing, she apologized about her behavior earlier than she... she"
"She what?!" Callie out of nowhere interfere
"Shetoldmeshesinlovewithme," I said in one breathe
"Wait what?! She told you that?" Callie question, Christina trying to understand what I just said, looks like she was playing it backward and in slow motion in her mind. Arizona she knows what I just said, waiting for me to calm down and repeat it.
I take a deep breathe and exhale "Kai told me that she's in love with me" lowering my head
"What's wrong with that? Don't you feel the same?" Arizona said
"She's a great woman and amazing in bed but the feeling is not reciprocal yet.."
"Yet? So there's a chance?" Callie said sounding sober
"I don't know, I don't know if I could love again. Been burned too many times, I can't give my heart to someone who might in the future cheat on me"
"Woah! That's deep Satan" Christina interrupts "how can you be sure that she'll cheat on you? Don't be judgmental Adds"
"I'm not, I have proof that every person that I loved in my life has been cheating with each other. A few years ago I was in a relationship with a person who I thought was the love of my life but she cheated, that's why I'm 100% sure the next person I will love also going to cheat on me" I finish showing a little bit of vulnerability, opening that topic about my break up with Meredith hurts me still because I thought she's the one.
"Oh," Arizona said then it became quiet for a moment, nobody know what to say after that. A few minutes passed when we heard a voice that was very familiar to me
"What can we do? Dr. Montgomery, we're naturally polygamous" the blonde said behind Callie
I scoff "Really? That alibi makes me feel sad, and I refuse to accept that. For me, if you choose to love, you should be faithful. Because if you love someone, why would you hurt them" I started staring into her eyes
"Can it be that I didn't mean to hurt her"
"What does that mean Dr. Grey? You just tripped and accidentally fell on top of a girl?"
"But when I stood up, you were the first person I look for" she stated flashing her sweet smile and winking at me, which makes me angry.
"But there's a part of you that stood up first" I replied smirking and looking down at her member and back to her eyes
"Ohhh! I know that one, maybe hair?" Meredith joked
I rolled my eyes at her response "right, that's where you're good at. Turning everything into a joke, you never take anything seriously"
"But I was serious about you"
"There!" I said standing up from my seat "another thing you're good at! Flowery yet empty words! Everyone is a liar"
"Hey Satan, stop generalizing" Christina interfere, I turn my gaze to her
"As I've said before, every person I've met is either a liar or a cheater, maybe both" I speech
"Maybe but people can change right?" Meredith said
"I've heard that before, but it was never fulfilled" returning my gaze to her, as I said that my emotion seek out into my eyes. I could tell that she saw it too.
"That's why I asked for your forgiveness"
"One sorry is never enough!"
"It wasn't just one apology Addie, I apologized too many times but you didn't give me a chance, then we graduated and you left to live in another country till I couldn't find you. I'm a sorry baby girl" I didn't know what to respond I was speechless hearing her confession, I couldn't handle this right now.
Meredith is the past, and the main reason I am here is to get advice from my two best friends with peace in my mind but God hates me and sends Meredith at the right time when I'm seeking help.
I open my mouth and close it a couple of times trying to come up with words but I couldn't, and also I couldn't just stand there and be an idiot I've never been until I met Meredith. No! She cannot do that to me again, I've had enough of making myself a fool so I left the scene without a word.
I heard Callie, Christina and Meredith call me but I did not look back. I need to clear my head
"Meredith is the past and now Kai confesses her feelings" I kept repeating to myself
But am I ready to love or even like someone? I'm scared, after Meredith I don't know if I could love again.
Without me knowing I was in front of my house, it's a big house, therefore, I had somebody living with me because living alone on a huge property is kinda lonely.
I enter the house and went straight to my bathroom, filling my bathtub with hot water and putting aromatic candles to relax my mind and my body, t's a kind of meditation for me.
Forty minutes later I heard Callie calling me from downstairs.
"Addison! Get your but down here now!" I get ready and went downstairs
"What?"
"Explain, what just happened at the bar? Meredith was your ex?"
"Yes"
"Why you never told me it was her, ever since she got here"
"I don't know, I was in shock and that the love of my life is here in front of me," I said without thinking it through, did I just say the love of my life
"What?! What did you just say?" I didn't say anything, I just kept quiet "Addie are you still in love with her? And how about Kai?"
"I don't know if I still am or it's just nostalgia because she is here being Meredith but when I was with Meredith I had a vision of our future together, having our house in the Hamptons or the brownstone because we both love New York. With four or five kids running around if we got lucky, and we will build a family-friendly practice with other specialists who also work at the same hospital cause we're surgeons, were have hectic schedules always" I said sitting down, trying to make myself comfortable as possible. Knowing Callie she wouldn't let go of this subject till she got her answers and solved it.
"All those visions and dreams, the life we're supposed to build went into the drain."
"What happened?" Callie asks caressing my back and comforting me
"We were in our fourth year in med school, we were the perfect couple. One night she asked me if she can go out to hang out with her friends, as I was not a terror or jealous girlfriend I let her go and have fun. When it was the time she said she'd be home came but she never arrive, I called and called a few times until she answered or someone answered I heard moaning about hers and the girl she was with. I stayed on the line for a couple of minutes when I heard Meredith moan the girl's name that's when I hang up" I pause taking deep breaths controlling my tears, I cannot cry. Callie continued rubbing my back while hugging me, I put my head on her shoulder
"In the morning I heard her entering our apartment with swollen eyes and from that I know she knew what she had done, I was late for class at that time even though we are having trouble in our relationship I still went to the class cause I cannot handle the thought of all the hardships and trials we've been through together that's where we end up one night of mistake. When she run after me and ask for forgiveness I was ready to forgive her but this girl she'd been with came and announced to everyone that she and Meredith slept together that night. I could not bear the humiliation she put me through, I had enough of her so I punched her in the face and left" as I proceed I realize that I was already crying, I curse Meredith to make me so weak.
"Since then I never talked to her when she approached me till our graduation that was the last time I saw her and heard from her, I still kept in touch with Jess her best friend also became my best friend. Whenever she tried to tell me about Meredith's whereabouts or what she's doing I always block it off"
"What about Kai?" I lift my head to look at her
"What about her?"
"She told you she loves you, what are you gonna do about it?"
"Oh, I told her to give me more time because I don't want to give her false hope. She's amazing and brought joy to my life I will hate myself if I hurt her even if it's unintentional"
"Have you forgiven Meredith for the past?"
"I don't know," I said letting out a deep sigh, Callie hugs me for emotional comfort.
Meredith's POV
"Dr. Grey! Wait up" I heard Dr. Robbins call me from behind, I did what she said I waited for her outside the bar.
"Dr. Robbins" I greeted
"Are you okay?" She asks coming toward me
"Yeah" I let out a laugh "I kind of expected that from Addison" Arizona nods
"So, you and Addie ha" it's my turn to nod "how long?"
"Three years"
"Wow, then what happened?" I turn to face her with a questionable look, she was there when Addison threw my mistake in my face. Hasn't she connected the dots that I cheated?
"I know, I connected the dots. You cheated, however, there are always two sides to a story. I've heard Addison's side, if you want you can tell me" she said reading my mind
"Where do I begin?" I started
"Were you happy with her?" I nodded "did you have problems before it happened?" I shake my head negatively, Arizona let out a sigh "if you're uncomfortable I wouldn't push, I will leave you alone now it looks like you needed. I'll just be here if you need me" she was about to stand up and leave when I held her wrist indicating for her to stay.
"Addison was the love of my life, I knew it from the start when I laid my eyes on her. It was during a party, I was playing the drum at that time and it started to rain. All my life I hated the rain, for me it represents unhappiness but at that moment it changed my perspective on everything, she made my life better" I pause I felt Arizona sit down beside me so I continue
"After that incident, I never saw any other woman I would spend the rest of my life with besides Addison, when she's around I do not see anyone other than her, she was my world. One night I was in the bar with my friends, we talked, danced and had a couple of drinks here and there. When it was time to go home I came across this girl she was my classmate and also Addison's but Addison hated her because this girl had a crush on me but I didn't mind because like I've said Addison was the only one."
"Addison and I had our ups and downs in the span of our relationship, but we knew we can conquer what the world threw us because we have each other. To cliche isn't it" I ironically chuckled "I was going to propose to her at our graduation, I already bought the ring but fate has different plans."
"To make the story short, after I went to the bathroom this girl insist to make me finish my drink but after I do not remember anything, next thing I knew I was in an unfamiliar place and the person sleeping beside me wasn't Addison. I get my things and left that place, on my way home I was crying because I do not know how to explain to Addison what happened, the taxi driver was kind trying to calm me down he went to the conclusion that I was drugged."
"When I got home I saw Addison getting ready for class, when I saw her eyes I knew I lost her. She knew what happened, I asked for her forgiveness, I tried to explain what occurs that not but she didn't believe me. When I saw her walk out of our apartment, my world shattered. I almost lost my mind, it was hard to see her every day but unable to talk to her, touch her, I loved her from afar. After our graduation that was the last time I saw her, I tried to ask people even my best friend because I knew they were close but even she hadn't said a word to me." I ended and I feel Arizona hug me for comfort, controlling my tears.
"It's just hard to talk about it but at least you're here, willing to listen. I just hope Addison has that attitude" I laugh sarcastically
"She didn't let you explain?" I shake my head no "oh, I'm sorry"
"It's alright, she seems happy after or she looks happy. I wish she will find someone who will not hurt her because she doesn't deserve it, she had been through a lot."
"You still love her"
"All these years she remains here" I pointed to my heart "I tried to forget her or at least minimized the feelings I have for her but she's different from all the women in my life when I'm with someone whether it was a one night stand or a fling I always see flows in them. Inside of me still compared them to Addie"
"What are your plans now with her" I shrug my shoulders
"I don't know, apparently asking for forgiveness isn't going to work. So I'd try to be civil and give her the space she wants"
"I saw how you reacted earlier at lunch, with Kai. She confessed her feelings to Addison before coming into the bar, that's why she went cause she want Christina and Callie to help her decide"
"Oh!" That's all I can respond to her "well... I... I hope she can.. make Addison... ha-happy" I chocked on my own words, trying to say a concrete sentence, I know that Addison has a lot of suitors and admirers but hearing those words that someone is in love with her and Addison looks like giving that person a chance hurts a lot inside of me.
"Why don't you fight also?"
"What?"
"You still love her, and I know she has feelings for you too. Even if she denies it I know she still loves you she's just afraid and with Kai, Addison has a kind heart she just doesn't want to hurt her that's why she's asking for help"
"You think so?"
"I know so"
I stare at Arizona's face, I know earning Addison's trust will be hard as a whole in a pin but I would take that for the love of my life.
