Hey guys! I have something a bit different than what I'd normally write to share with you.
First of all, this is a collaboration with the incredible Lizzy0305 (Go check out her work). 1-2yrs ago Lizzy0305 told me about the Spirk fics she had tucked up her sleeve, and of course I wanted to read them. Fragments was sent to me as the first chapter and half of the second chapter...I read them ravenously and demanded more. Unfortunately it was very far down on the list, and so I asked if I could finish it for her, and she agreed ^_^
So those parts, and a very small bit of chapter 4 was written by Lizzy0305 (with some tweaking) and the rest was written by me.
Another thing I'd like to mention is; if you didn't read the summary - this is basically a fuck or die situation in the first chapter, aliens force them to have sex, and it can have a bit of a non-con/dub-con feel for this chapter.
The whole story is written, so I'll be updating regularly.
Anyway, hope you enjoy the story, and don't forget to let us know what you think. Much love xox
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Even considering Jim's mostly unclothed state at that moment, seeing Spock was an incredible relief. Because if Spock was here, then Jim had a chance to survive this unbelievable situation without any further harm. Without him, Jim knew, he was just dead. Spock was his only hope left, so when he first saw his tall figure in the dimly lit room, he could finally take a deep breath. Then he saw Spock's expression.
First of all, he had one. The concern was clearly readable on his features and knowing pretty well about his Vulcan heritage, that was a big red flag already.
Slowing his steps, Spock glanced around the room, searching for any way to escape but of course it was impossible. They'd already tried but the inhabitants of the planet didn't want them to leave so there was no way to do so. They were both clever, intelligent, combat trained people, but Jim could see that Spock had realised a fact that he had known since he had been tied out here; that there was no way of getting out without alerting their captors. There were at least twenty heavy soldiers surrounding the chamber, not to mention the audience.
The two men behind Spock pushed him towards Jim with their spears. He flinched and looked back at his Captain, his worry even clearer. Jim wondered anxiously what they had done to Spock.
As he came closer and stepped under that little light that was shining in the area, Jim saw that his hands were cuffed behind him and long green marks covered his naked torso, matching his own red ones, green blood trickled from his mouth, down his jaw, and onto his neck. Spock had been tortured too.
"No…" he heard himself cry angrily, and protectively. He would kill all of those bastards if they laid a hand on him again. He tried to free himself, struggling against the iron-like chains around his wrists and neck. He failed again, just like the past hundred times he'd tried, again he felt pain as the unbreakable metal slashed deeper into his skin, making him almost incapable of breath.
Then Spock reached him. He stood right in front of Jim, the guards took off his handcuffs, and then backed away, out of the room, effectively locking them in together.
Within a minute they were left alone. Well, almost alone as Jim knew perfectly well that on the other side of the mirror-like glass there were about twenty of their captors watching them, just as they watched Jim being tortured and punished for a crime he did not commit. At least that was the reason they'd given as to why they held him here, in a chamber deep under the surface of the planet without his crew knowing about his whereabouts. But he was fine with that 'til now, he was fine with the fact that he was the one they wanted to torture, or rather study, because it really felt like that, but if they had done the same to his First Officer, he sure as hell he was going make them suffer. They would regret everything they had done to Spock.
"Captain."
"Spock, are you alright?" Jim stepped toward him, his hand wanted to reach out for him automatically but of course the chains still held him back, so he couldn't touch the Vulcan, to make sure that he was really there, only a foot away from Jim.
"My physical condition is… sufficient."
"Then get these things off of me and let's get out of here," Jim jingled the chains indicating what he meant.
"I… I am not able to fulfill that order yet, Captain," something felt weird. Something in Spock's voice was definitely not right.
"Spock… They won't hurt you again… will they?"
"No. They are… They are willing to let us both go." He answered slowly, his eyes drifting from Jim's to the ground then back to him just to snap back to studying the filthy floor beneath.
"Then why are you still standing there? Free me and…"
"Before we are free to depart, I have to do as they ordered or else they will kill you first then, most probably myself as well," He stated, his voice was so emotionless, so monotone as if he had been reading out a report.
"'Ordered'? What did they order you to do? Spock what…?" As he looked into blue eyes, fear started climbing up Jim's throat. Spock hadn't done anything to him and yet he was already apologising with his eyes. He was already regretting everything he might do with Jim in the future and Jim was sure that Spock was sent here to do something with him, something which would either be very painful or… even more painful.
"They offered… a kind of exchan-"
"You're not gonna stay here instead of me. No way. Out of the question Spock," Jim cut in before Spock could even finish the sentence. That was not going to happen. He'd rather die than leave Spock here with these folks. No. Just no.
"Captain." That title again. But the way Spock said it… like he constantly wanted to remind Jim that their relationship was only professional and that this was only a mission. Like… "They were ready to let me go if I left you behind."
"Then what the hell are you still doing here?!" He shouted at Spock, because he, by all means, shouldn't be here.
"I am not willing to depart without you. Captain."
"That's just stupid Spock. Go back to the ship; that is an order."
"That is not going to happen."
"Spock! I just gave you a direct order. You go back to the ship and come back to me with-"
"Come back to your dead body, you mean? They made me very aware of the fact that after I leave, you will die in the most painful way that they know how to kill someone, just because 'they are curious'."
"Oh…"
"'Oh' is right Captain. So now, I believe we have three choices. One, I go back to the Enterprise and you die painfully. Two, you are not willing to obey their orders and we both die right here; I have no information about their method of killing us in this case, but we can assume that it will not be pleasant. Three, we follow their orders, we survive and we both go back to the ship. Alive."
"How do you know they will let us go after we do whatever they want us to do?"
"I… They gave their word."
Jim had to laugh at that, "Spock, they just tortured me, and by the way you look I assume you as well. And you believe them?"
"Their culture does not let them act otherwise. They do not know expressions such as 'lie', 'betray', 'fake' or 'misguide'. Therefore, it is logical to believe them, if they stated that they will let us go freely after satisfying their curiosity." There it was again, that intangible monotonousness in his voice, like he didn't believe the words that were coming out of his own mouth, or just didn't like them, at all.
"What's the order?" Jim was becoming really suspicious and when he saw that hurt, apologetic look in Spock's eyes, he knew it was some really bad, ugly and certainly nasty thing. "Spock, speak up, what is it?"
His hands folded behind him, Spock's eyes lowered down to the floor, and Jim hated that he couldn't reach out to raise his chin to force him to look at him. Maybe even if he wasn't chained to the wall, he still wouldn't dare to do that, to touch Spock in such a familiar way.
"They… they want us to… p-participate in…" Spock stammered. Huge red flags showed up all around in Jim's brain even before Spock had finished the sentence in a rush, voice barely audible. "…a display of sexual intercourse."
He wasn't hearing that correctly, for sure. "You mean… have… sex… together?" He squeezed out. Not possible.
"Yes."
With that, Spock chanced a look at him. And Jim knew from that one glance that Spock was willing to do it. Only because of Jim, because he had the chance to go but he stayed here, because of his Captain, knowing the consequences, he still stayed and now it was all up to Jim if they died here or got to go back to their ship. But damn Jim can't, he just can not, will not do this to him, to himself, to both of them, because it's not going to happen. Not now, not here at least.
"No. We can't."
"Then we both will die."
"There's got to be another way."
"There is not."
"No."
"It was a pleasure to serve with you, Captain…" Spock acknowledged, his eyes flared up as he stepped closer. Anger. Deep anger. Or…
"Don't say that!" Jim snapped at him, pushing forward but the chains just cut into his skin again, He couldn't reach Spock, even though the distance was only a few inches.
Spock stepped even closer, his hands on Jim's waist as he pushed him slowly back to the wall he was chained to. When he reached the solid cold stones, his hands slid up on Jim's naked chest, one went to his neck, and the other to his back, holding him firmly in one place, no matter how much Jim tried to get free. Because he doesn't want this to happen. It can't. Not here, not because of them.
Spock whispered against Jim's ear and he knew he was all but lost in his First Officer's voice.
"I can help you, Jim… Let me…" Spock sighed, his hands caressed Jim, soothed him and he couldn't believe Spock was the one here with him.
Jim struggled with himself, knowing that Spock was only doing these things because some alien entity, some fucking bastard wanted them to have sex for their own fucked up entertainment and curiosity. He couldn't believe it was going to happen, because now he was sure that it would happen, and they were only going to do this because they were being forced to. Jim couldn't believe that what he had wanted for so long would finally come to pass, but not in the way he wanted. He had imagined this so many times, but never had he wanted it to happen like this; for them to be forced to do it. Nothing would ever be the same after this; they could break his bones, his spirit, but he couldn't deal with the way that this would destroy their current relationship, and anything that might have arisen between them in the future.
"No… Spock stop… stop this… Just stop," he implored as Spock's lips trailed along his jaw and neck, his fingers dashed firmly into Jim's skin both at his waist and his back.
"I will not let you die. I cannot let you die," Spock whispered against his ear and he could barely hear him because his heart was racing so fast in his chest. "Let me help. I can save you… I will pay whatever the price is… because you… Jim, you are too precious to me…"
Jim's eyes went wide at Spock words, but he couldn't say anything.
"I know… I know you do not wish me to obey them but I cannot… I cannot…" Spock searched Jim's eyes momentarily, begging for understanding before he closed his own and leaned his forehead against Kirk's.
Jim felt Spock's right hand slide down from his back, over his chest, and then lightly caress the side of the small black boxers that were covering the last of his modesty. The hand hovered there briefly before Spock's fingers dove under the fabric, pushing it down from his hips.
"… I can't let you die, not when I can do something to prevent that from happening." Spock focused on him again and Jim saw something in those expressive eyes, but he could not decipher the look. "For your life I would risk our friendship… I would risk that you will detest me from now on…" He muttered, voice broken and Jim couldn't entirely concentrate on his words as Spock's right hand in his boxers was really close to a certain point which should absolutely not be touched by him. Not now at least because that would leave him without any resistance against what he truly wanted, the dam would break and there could be no coming back from that. "For your life… I would do anything…" Spock closed his eyes again, and so did Jim as Spock found that one point at last, fingers folded around Jim's cock, and moved lightly over his already half hard erection.
"No!" Jim moaned desperately, torn between how wrong the situation was, and how good it felt for Spock to touch him, "Please Spock, don't do this…"
It would break Spock, it would kill him inside, and Jim didn't want that. He could feel it, Spock didn't want this, not like Jim did. This should not happen with Spock; Spock deserved better. So much more and so much better.
"The ship needs you, your crew needs you and this is the only way… to give you back to them… Please cease your struggle…" Spock pleaded because Jim was fighting against the chains again. His hand moving on Jim made it impossible not to struggle, to moan with pleasure.
"Let me help… Please Jim…" His hand shifted firmly and Jim was completely hard, because despite of where they were and why Spock was doing it, this was arousing because Spock was doing it and Jim had wanted to feel this for so god damn long.
"Oh fucking god!" Jim cried out as Spock tore down his boxers and his leg was automatically folded around Spock's waist, and within a second he felt a wet finger at his bottom and, Oh my god…
"Let me save you Jim…" Spock repeated against his ear, slowly pushing up that finger and Jim moaned loudly because he couldn't resist, who could resist this?
The dam broke in Jim's mind, "Oh fucking hell, do it! Fuck…" me.
Oh fuck, this couldn't be happening, it must be some weird heated, erotic dream, it couldn't possibly be real. He could not be really doing this, not when others were watching them, though they couldn't hear or see these people at all. Jim just knew that they were there but Spock was there too, oh yes he was, and he was so hot against him, like burning fire. The next moment he found himself up against the wall, hands on his waist, pulling him up until both his legs were wrapped around Spock. He could feel him as he undid the buttons on his pants and god Jim knew what was about to happen but it still surprised him when he felt Spock hard against him.
Then a hand was on his head right over the meld points and he didn't understand why… melding now would be… Melding during sex… Surely that would be…
"I can make it easier… I can take away the pain…" Spock explained quietly.
Jim felt pain when Spock tried to thrust into him, not down there but at his wrists. He wanted to touch Spock so badly that the irons cut deeply into him. This time he could feel the hot, red blood ooze down his arm and he let out a frustrated groan.
Spock noticed the blood and let out an angry growl. Then before Jim could even nod or shake his head, Spock pressed his fingertips deeper into his skin over the meld points and after that he didn't feel any pain at all. All of a sudden, and with a swift motion he was free, completely free, because Spock had just ripped the metal chains off of him without hurting him deeper. Jim's hand immediately tangled itself in coarse black hair, gripping wildly, while the other curled around his shoulders, pulling him impossibly closer, even though they already stood chest to chest, hips to hips, as close as possible.
It felt so awesome, when Spock slid inside of him slowly and lightly, that he immediately forgot where they were, and why they were doing this. The desire for Spock, which he had felt as long as he'd known the Vulcan, made him forget about their environment, or maybe it was Spock but he just didn't care anymore.
Jim moaned and gasped for air, his fingers dashed into Spock's skin as he lifted Spock's head by his hair and without comprehending his own actions he kissed the Vulcan wild and hard without any restraint because fuck he had wanted to do that for too long. Finally his tongue invaded that hot mouth, and Jim almost ravished him.
Spock groaned deep and low and he moved faster, deeper and his fingers on Jim's head left the meld point and slid into his hair, over his nape as he smashed Jim into the wall driving into him.
Jim's back rhythmically thudded against the cold wall and he couldn't help but to whimper into Spock's mouth because it just felt so good, he felt so good, so fierce in front of him, like the blazing sun, so much heat radiated from his body that Jim could feel himself burning up.
For a moment, even through all of this intense fire Jim felt something else, something in his mind and he couldn't feel the cold wall behind him anymore, only soft fabric and somehow he knew Spock was doing it. Changing the scene around them, making it more comfortable for Jim, because as he glanced around he could see his own quarters not that dark chamber he knew was there beyond his mind's eye.
Although he knew he was still there in that chamber, Spock made it appear as if he were not. It felt as if he was lying flat on his back, on his own bed and this was not happening because they had to do it but because they wanted to. It just made everything that much better, even with the knowledge that it was happening only in his head because Spock was inside him not just physically but also mentally…
"Jim…" Spock gasped, lips against his, hands grasped his waist as Spock plunged into him with almost brutal force which should have been painful but the only thing he knew was that he wanted more, more-
"More!" Jim demanded loudly against Spock's lips, biting him before burying his mouth into his soft, hot neck, sucking, nibbling which caused Spock to shove his head back with a raw moan.
He drove into Jim with more force and went impossibly deeper, and shit, Spock scraped the small of his back which made Jim cry out shrilly because fuck, that's just so good.
"Spock…" Jim wanted to say something else, he wanted to say 'you are so fucking good', or beg for a faster, harder rhythm, or simply just ask for more, but he couldn't, he just couldn't freaking speak as his voice went all husky and rough and Spock was just so incredible that Jim was left speechless.
Spock pulled him up to his lips but before they joined in another searing kiss, the Vulcan whispered, barely audible, "Please forgive me… Jim… please…"
Fucking hell, Spock's voice was so broken.
Jim opened his eyes, finding so much anguish in the eyes of the Vulcan but then he kissed Jim and he couldn't say anything, he couldn't tell Spock that it was alright because Jim felt him thrust into him one more time with such force, that it was almost inhuman and then he let out a guttural cry and so did Jim as they both came, shuddering and jerking in each other's arms.
Jim was slammed against the wall one more time, the world was so white and vibrating but then everything just became slowly black, fading away and he held onto Spock but it was useless. He just drifted far away from the Vulcan's warm body.
o.O.o
He wanted to open his eyes but he wasn't capable of that just yet. So he tried to find out where he was with his other senses. He couldn't move his hands, though he could feel a soft blanket on him. He heard noises and his head began to ache as if on cue, but it didn't stop him from trying to concentrate even harder.
"Don't worry, he's going to be alright. I gave him a sedative; he should be awake soon."
A familiar voice, a friend. Bones. Sickbay.
Bones clearly didn't know that he was already awake, he tried to speak but it didn't work. What the hell kind of sedative was this?
"How much time?" An urging voice, and he didn't even have to think about who it was, as he knew that voice as he knew his own. Spock.
"It depends on his system. Maybe minutes or an hour at most."
"I need a precise time, Doctor."
"You see Spock, that's what I am, a doctor, not a fortune-teller."
"How much?" Spock's voice became even more urging and angry and even a bit threatening and Jim just wanted to smile. But he couldn't.
"Now listen you damn hobgoblin!" Bones' voice was filled with irritation. "You bring him to me in that condition, and you're not willing to tell me what the hell happened to him and that alone pisses me off so much that I want to throw you out of my sickbay. But I know he would want you to be here when he first wakes up, god knows why he likes you, so I will let you be here but that's all. If you had anything to do with his injuries, god help me I'll kill you with my bare hands, because I think that's why you aren't telling me about it. See, I am the CMO of this ship, I'm his doctor, moreover his friend, and I should have every right to know how he got into this condition. But you don't want to tell me, and for some unknown reason I respect that up to a certain point. And you just reached that point Mr Spock. So, if you don't want me to either throw you out of here or to sedate you to be able to beat the truth out of you, then leave me alone with your stupid questions. He will wake up soon."
Jim was actually happy that Spock didn't tell Bones about what had happened. First, they had to make things clear between them.
"I…I shall remain here until he wakes up then. You may go back to your work and I will call for you as soon as he wakes."
"See, we can work together." Bones' tone was falsely sweet and Jim could imagine he was grinning wildly, and then he heard his footsteps getting further away from the bed.
A moment later Jim was touched by warm fingers on his face and he knew it was him.
He could feel Spock's hot breath against his ear as the Vulcan whispered to him, Jim was terrified by his words as he still couldn't move and he couldn't stop Spock, couldn't explain the truth of the matter.
"I am begging for your forgiveness. Though you will not remember what has happened on the planet, I hope you will forgive me, if you ever do realise the truth. You won't remember anything that happened there, not the capturing, not the torture, not even us. I know you did not want… our intercourse but I had to bring you back and that was the only logical path that allowed you to return to this ship alive again. My intention was never to hurt you, as I once stated you are too precious to me. Even more so than I could ever confess. Therefore, I am taking away all of the bad memories from you, and hopefully increasing the speed of your recovery. The Enterprise needs it's Captain back."
Jim screamed internally, he tried desperately to fight away the numbness of his body but the sedative was too effective and he couldn't do anything when cool fingers slid over the meld-points.
He should have said something back on the planet, anything, to assure Spock, to stop him from making this mistake. It was too late now though, Spock had said that he would pay any price, now they both would because Jim had been too afraid, too lost in the moment to say anything.
Teardrops trickled from Jim's eyes onto his face, but Spock didn't see them as he spoke determinedly, "Forget."
And then the darkness surrounded Jim again.
