It's been a week since Blackbeard made his reappearance and Ed is exhausted. It was tiresome before when he could be himself with the crew but, this time, Ed is gone. Except for the confinements of his cabin. That's his safe place to let everything out, all the feelings, the emotions. Despite trying his best to be the perfect Blackbeard, he's been burying himself in rum and self-pity, spending most of his time in Stede's secret room. He couldn't force himself to destroy it, the last piece of Stede that was left in this stupid ship. He ought to change the name.

"Captain"

"Ugh", he grunts, "what is it?"

"Um... We- They- You should see this", stutters Fang from the other side of the door. Everyone knows better than to enter his room without his permission.

"This better be worth it or you'll be enjoying a nutritious meal with your toes as your main ingredient"

"Ye- Yes, captain"

Once he gets on deck, Izzy tosses him the spyglass in anger and points to the horizon, "take a fucking look at this. I can't believe it. I thought we finally got rid of them. Of him!"

Ed opens the spyglass and takes a look, only to drop it and take a few steps back until he reaches the door and runs to lock himself in his cabin. His cabin. Stede's cabin. No, no, no, no, no. He's not ready yet. It's too soon.

He's been planning for weeks what he would do to him when they inevitably met again. Has planned hundreds of different ways to kill him, only to always end up crying himself into the bottle dressed in his robe.

Fucking Stede. First he gives him hope, making feel good and confident about himself only to take it away and crush his heart in a thousand miserable pieces and now he is back to... what exactly? He doesn't even know what to expect.

He hears loud noises from deck and lets out a deep breath.

"Come on, Ed. Blackbeard. You're Blackbeard. Let's get this done with"

He stands by the door outside and sees his current crew and his former crew standing there without really knowing what to do or say. Well, except for Izzy who keeps blabbing stupid orders about killing them or torturing them or whatever sick thing he wants to do to them. And then... Then he sees... him. Him. Gods, he looks even more beautiful than he remembered. This pirate look really suits him, even more than his gentleman aesthetic.

"Ed", Stede sighs loudly.

He just stands there without saying anything. Unable to say anything.

"Ed... I'm s-"

"Izzy, get these men off my ship"

"Yes, captain", he says, marching towards them with a smirk.

He stops him with a hand on his chest, "don't hurt them. Just, get these fools out of here".

Izzy looks at him to argue his decision but the look in his eyes make him recapacitate.

"Ed, please", he doesn't look at him but he can hear tears in his voice.

"Come on, get on moving, people. Get these fuckers out of here and let's find some real pirates to fight"

"Ed, wait-"

Ed turns around and walks over to Stede, hand on his sword, just in case. He grabs him by the hair and pulls, forcing him to look up at him but refusing to look him in the eyes.

"My name is Blackbeard", he says before he lets go of his hair and turns towards his crew.

He hears a thumping noise behind him –as Stede falls to his knees– and a quiet sniff, "Ed... Blackbeard, I'm yours. Do as you must"

Ed feels tears gathering in his eyes and heads to the cabin as he says over his shoulder "Lock him up somewhere... Don't hurt him. I'll deal with him later"

* . * . * . * . *

After a few hours, Ed visits Stede in what once was the Jam room now converted into a cell.

"Ed! Hi, it's- it's so good to see you"

He opens the door and stands aside to let him out.

"Ed?"

Once he's out, Ed walks closer until he's within reach and punches him in the face.

"Ow! Ed, what-"

Another punch, followed by a hit to the stomach.

"Ugh, Ed..."

A few more punches follow and Stede ends up falling on his back.

"Fight back, dammit! Fight me!", he yells trying to fight the tears.

"I don't want to hurt you"

"You already did", Ed laughs bitterly no longer bothering to stop the tears, "you might as well finish the fucking job"

He sees Stede's face fall into a deep frown full of sadness and guilt but too little too late.

"You know, I waited for hours on that dock for you. So go on, hurt me", he says quietly, all the fight leaving his body, leaving behind only sadness and despair, "Destroy me once and for all"

Stede sits up and stares at him, "I know. You're right. I hurt you"

Ed lets out a scoff, although if anyone were to describe it they would probably say it was more of a sob.

"I would like to explain myself. Please, let me explain why... what happened"

"Well, come on. Give me a good reason for you to break my fucking heart, Stede Bonnet"

"I- I really was planning on leaving with you. I swear"

Ed sighs deeply, not wanting to hear his lame excuses.

"I- That night... I was waiting. Waiting for the lad you were gonna send to wake me but Badminton woke me up at gun point before he arrived and took me to the woods to kill me. He started to say these things..."

"He did what?", he interrupts but Stede continues, not hearing him.

"He was right. He was telling me how I wasn't enough for you, for my wife, my kids. And then he- he... then he died. I was so scared. So full of guilt that I run to the last place where I felt I had some kind of control. So I run to my wife, only to find out that she is in a happy relationship with this lovely fella. I felt guilty for leaving her like the way I did but turns out it was what she needed to make a life of her own. She's a painter now, and a good one at that. After a week trying to take back my place in her life she... she tried to kill me and we talked. That's when... That's when I realized that I l- How I felt. And she helped me fake my own death so I could start my new life", he smiles, "that was a good act of fuckery, if I may say so myself. You would've been proud"

Ed looks overwhelmed by this information. Shock, anger, guilt and sadness working their way through his face.

"And that's why... It had nothing to do with you. Nothing you did. I just... was scared. But now I know where I truly belong and I promise not to leave you again"

"Yeah, right. What about the next time you feel scared? What then?"

"I won't. I know you don't trust me at the moment, and you are absolutely right no to, but I promise, I'm not leaving again"

"So there's nothing that can make you leave? What if you disagree with something I do? I'm not the same person you left behind. I'm Blackbeard. I'm not your Ed anymore. I can't- I can't survive you leaving again"

"There's nothing you can do to make me leave you, I promise. You're still Ed. And I won't leave unless you truly want me to"

Ed stares at him, tears running down his face.

Stede notices he is trembling and approaches slowly, afraid of being rejected, but Ed just closes the distance and falls down in his arms, sobbing loudly on his neck.

"Fuck, I missed you, man. Missed you so much"

"I'm sorry. I'm so sorry"

"No, I'm sorry. Fuck, what am I gonna do? Your crew hates me, mine probably does too. They are gonna kill me in my sleep"

"No, they won't. I explained what happened. They understand. And besides, you could have killed them, but you chose not to. They appreciate it"

"What I did to Lucius..."

"That... That might be harder to explain, but again, you could have killed him right there and then. You couldn't and that's what makes the difference. You just have to play nice with Lucius and Black Pete. Jim too, probably"

Ed just hugs him tighter and lets out all the pain and sorrow of the last few weeks.

"Hey", says Stede cupping his cheeks and cleaning his tears with his thumbs, "You're okay. We're all okay"

Ed sniffs, puts his hands on the nape of his neck, and leans in to kiss him softly.

Stede pulls back and Ed fears he's done something wrong. That Stede doesn't want him like that. Maybe that's another reason why he left. Maybe he scared him away.

"Hey, stop that. I want this. I just... I wanted to say something first, Ed. My beautiful Ed. I want- I need you to understand what you've done to me. I've always felt like I didn't belong, ever since I was a little boy. At school, in my marriage, there was always something wrong with me. But with you... You made me feel so special. You're the first person to accept me for who I am. I- Thank you, for that. You made me feel... I... I love you, Ed. I love you so much. I want you to know that. I need you to know that"

"Stede... Man, you can't do this to me. I'm Blackbeard. I'm supposed to be tough", he says smiling.

"Well, we're alone now. You can be yourself here. With me"

"I know. Everything you said... It's the same for me. You're the first person to truly see me. Not just Blackbeard, but me"

Stede smiles and leans in to kiss him, but Ed stops his before their lips connect.

"Hey, I love you too, Stede Bonnet", and he kisses him hard, making Stede let out a surprised groan before responding with the same passion.

After a while, they hear voices down the hall.

"Captain! We need to talk about these fucking-"

Izzy stands at the door, disgust written all over his face.

"No fucking way! Not again! What the fuck is it with this fucking guy? Stede fucking Bonnet"

"Izzy..."

"No! No, you're Blackbeard. You can't let this fucking twat weaken you like this. Let me take care of him", he says raising his sword towards Stede.

"Touch one fucking hair in his head and next time it will be your balls going down your throat", hisses Ed stepping between them.

Izzy stops, sword still raised, and looks at him.

"Fine, then. Fuck you. Fuck you, both. I'm out of here"

"Uh, uh. Not a chance. Last time I let you leave you brought the fucking army on us. You're staying here"

Izzy gapes at him and lowers his sword.

"Get in there, come on!"

"Ed, maybe we shouldn't..."

"No, last time I almost lost you. I'm not taking that chance again. He stays here until I decide what to do with him"

Stede smiles and hugs him close to him.

"I never told you how much I appreciated what you did for me"

Ed shrugs and Stede takes his face in his hands.

"No, you gave up everything for me, Ed. I was... Fuck, I was so scared! I really thought I was gonna die in that dock, but you saved me"

"Well, you know me. Edward Teach, born on a beach, saving Stede"

"Will you let me thank you later?"

"Oh, god, please. Stop!", gags Izzy, "Please, just stop!"

Ed laughs and takes Stede hand, pulling him towards the door.

"We'll leave, Izzy the Spewer"