A matter of trust
McRoll Pairing
season 3, episode 18
Chapter 3:
Before he turned his phone off, he noticed he had a text from Danny and several missed calls from his mother.. He quickly texted Danny back to let him know he was spending the night over at Catherine's but that it was her day off the next day and so he decided to take a personal day as well, wanting to spend it with her and telling him he was turning his phone off and to only contact him through Catherine if there was no other option.
As he finished his text, the phone rang again and it was Doris.. He hit the ignore button and let it go to voice mail, before turning the phone off.. As much as he did love his mother, he was still pissed off at her, not for just making Catherine promise to not tell him, but also finding out about the microfiche and that it had been hidden away all those years in his own home, putting himself, Mary and his father all in danger.. Anyone could have come knocking all these years to find it..
Catherine was the woman he needed to make things up to, he knew that he overacted a little but given his history with his mother and his trust issues, it was understandable that he would have been hurt, and he knew she didn't mean to hurt him.. It was his mother whom he couldn't trust.. Catherine was just being loyal and trying to do right by Doris, so he couldn't fault her for that..
Heading to rainbow, he grabbed them both dinner, making sure to get Catherine's favourite and along the way he made a quick stop for some wine and flowers as well and then he was on the way to Catherine's, pulling up at her house and pulling into the driveway before stopping the truck, putting the handbrake on and into park.
Grabbing the items, and then locking the truck up, he headed inside and smiled softly, the smell of her shampoo and perfume wafting through the living room, heading to the round dinning table and setting down dinner, he then walked into the kitchen, found a vase and two wine glasses, pouring two glasses of red and putting the red roses in the vase with some water, before moving back to the table with the wine glasses and the vase.. Then he quickly set the table and got some cutlery and plates, remembering the time she reminded him that a little romance every now and then was nice..
Before she came out, he had found some candles and lit them all around the table and room, turning the lights down low, and then plating their meals rather then eating out of the white cardboard box, sitting down at the table as he waited for Catherine to appear.
Getting dressed after her shower, she decided to go for comfort and dressed in a pair of sweats and a tank top, giving her hair a quick blow dry but otherwise letting it dry naturally. She could hear Steve out in the living room as she was dressing and smiled softly to herself.. It had been a while since they had stayed together at her place, most of the time she stayed over at his place, but even though it had been a while, he still felt right at home, which made her feel comfortable and relaxed.
Walking down the stairs and into the living room, she couldn't believe what he had done.. The set up.. the whole candlelight and wine, roses, low romantic music was playing in the background from the stereo and her heart skipped a beat.. Standing there, she couldn't help but gasp lightly as she took in a breath.. "Well, well..", she responded in a low voice..
"You look like Commander McGarrett", she moved slowly closer to him, taking a breath as she breathed in his scent, "You smell like Commander McGarrett", as she was doing this, he smirked, with a knowing look on his face, "but the Commander McGarrett I know usually doesn't like all this romance.. what have you done with him?"
Standing up to greet her, he took her hand, pulling her closer for a moment, kissing her softly and guiding her to her seat, and waiting till she was seated before tucking in her chair and then sitting down opposite her. The two of them many times had not gotten to dinner because of other insatiable habits, but tonight he wanted to make sure they had dinner, and had a chance to talk about everything.
"Well, Lieutenant Rollins", he answered as he leaned over to hand her the glass of wine, "I thought a change would be nice and appreciated," smiling softly looking into her eyes. Making sure to clink her glass with him before taking a sip of her wine, she moaned in appreciation and nodded her head setting down the wine on the table. "It is very much appreciated Sailor".
As they were both starving, they tucked into their dinner and ate quietly, listening to the music and just enjoying their meals, only occasionally speaking to talk about the service that day for Dana Moore. Once they had both finished their meals, Catherine began to stand up to clean up but Steve instead gestured to her to stay seated while he picked up the plates and took them over to the sink to wash up.
Bringing the wine back over to the table, he topped their glasses off, and then held out his hand to her, Catherine standing up, taking his hand in hers, her wine glass in the other as he lead her to the couch, both of them sitting down, Steve taking a sip of the wine and then putting the glass down on the coffee table.
With a sigh, he took a deep breath in and out before he began to talk, taking her hand in his and squeezing softly as he gazed into her eyes. "I have trust issues with my mother.. we both know that Cath.. I've come to terms with the fact that I don't trust her," he sighed again softly.. Looking down for a moment, he felt Catherine's fingers rubbing his hand that sill held hers and he looked back up..
"You were the first woman I really opened up to about my life, and what I thought at the time happened to my mother, and how Dad shipped Mary and I off to the mainland.. I trust you Catherine.. I know there are things we can't tell each other about our time spent in the Navy and classified ops, and that is fine.. I understand that.. I know that we don't often talk about our relationship status, and that is just how we both run, however I believe for our relationship to be cohesive and strong, we need to be honest and open about everything else".
It was his way of not blaming her, nor putting the responsibility solely onto her as well.. He knew he needed to make sure he stood by the words he was saying as well, and remain honest and open with her as well. This was what she needed, what they both needed… None of the shouting and screaming and bringing up every slight little incident they have had together.. They were in this together and together was the only way they could make sure they got through it.
Tugging her a little closer, he could sense she was a lot more relaxed, and she moved closer to his side, her eyes never leaving his as her hand moved towards his face, her fingers rubbing over his clean shaven face, staring at him in such wonderment that she deserved this man.. That he choose her to be with over and over again.. "You have my word Steve that I'll be honest and more open.. I was wrong, and I'm not going to give you any bullshit reasons to excuse it.. I knew I should have told you at the time, It felt wrong the whole time and though Doris was the one to make me promise.. I didn't have to agree to it".
It did make him feel better to hear Catherine own up to her mistake, and not try to reason it away with some excuse about why she thought she was doing the right thing at the time.. It might be noble to think you are doing it to stop the one you love from being hurt, but the more noble thing is to tell the truth, the whole truth and nothing but the truth even if you know it's going to hurt the one you love. "From the moment I met you Steve, back at the academy, I just.. I just knew you were special, and the one I wanted.. You are many of my first experiences and while I never intended or wanted to hurt you.. I know that I did and for that I'm so sorry".
Leaning into her, he kissed her gently, and then tugged her even closer, pulling her onto his lap, letting her straddle him, both hands on her cheeks as he kissed her deeper, feeling her body respond to him, before he pulled away for a moment.. "We're good Cath", he whispered softly, his way of saying that he forgave her, her smile brightening a little before capturing his lips in another searing kiss..
Feeling him respond to her, the bludge in his pants growing, this, she thought was better then good.. Her body was itching to be closer to him, skin to skin.. She had a whole week to make up for not being closer to him, and she intended to use every moment they were together to make it up to him and show him how much she loved him.
Author's Notes.
Good Evening to you all.. I hope you are all doing well in the world during this trying time, and hope my stories bring you a bit of enjoyment in this otherwise weird time in the world. I'm going to focus on some of my ongoing stories but I keep finding myself going down a rabbit hole of McRoll whenever I re-watch an old earlier episode involving them too and wanting to dissect their thoughts and feelings about certain situations.
This one, I saw and was inspired by the end of the episode where it seems like he forgives her with a kiss and a hug, and I wanted to take it further and give the scene and the whole episode a bit more depth when it comes to figuring out the internal torment they would have been going through in this one.. Some of you might agree, others might disagree when it comes to how I have portrayed Steve in this one but for me, I feel it is still very much in character and that he isn't one to want conflict with Catherine which is why he asked her to leave Doris's home when she told him about Mangosta.
I'm fairly certainly this one will last a few more chapters at least.. I obviously would love to continue this on chapter four and do a make up sex scene as well as the morning after when they wake up together and Steve reveals he has the day off to Catherine so they can spend it together.. I think at times Catherine felt their relationship was often put on the back burner when it came to cases.. I know she never said anything but at the same time, you could sense the disappointment in her eyes when their conversations got cut short due to him having to take a call and then leave so I'm always one for loving to see more romantic uninterrupted scenes of them two that don't revolve around work, or the other team members.
