Chapter 8: The Kids

It was two days later when Bandit and the girls arrived at the park that he and Brett had discussed. It was a familiar sight, being the same one where he'd met Fido about half a year prior-I wonder how he's doing, it's been a while since we talked. The girls were used to it, which helped as it was their first proper outing to play with other kids aside from Muffin and Socks since the fire. Bandit glanced at his phone, it was almost ten, which meant that Brett should be arriving soon. A moment later he heard a light honking and saw that Brett was pulling into a parking spot two over from where he and the girls were unloading.

"Alright girls, remember, I want you to be comfortable. So if things start to feel like too much, come and get me. Okay?"

"Okay dad." Bingo nodded.

"Just try your best, I know it's been a little bit since you've been around new kids, but Bentley and Baxter have gone through some stuff like you two, they also lost their mum a little while ago."

"They did?" Bluey asked.

"Yes, that's why Brett and I figured you four could play together; it might help you both to talk and play with kids that have gone through similar stuff." Bandit replied honestly.

"Okay, I'll try." Bluey nodded.

"Me too." Bingo added.

"I'm proud of you girls. Now come on, the boys are waiting."

Brett was busy unfolding a stroller as two boys stood beside him next to the blue station wagon. The two adults said hello as the kids started their own conversation.

"Hi, I'm Bluey." Blue waved her hand as she approached.

"And I'm Bingo." Bingo added, a smaller wave accompanying her hello.

The two boys looked at each other before the older one talked.

"Hi, I'm Bentley." The older boy smiled, his braces visible a moment before he adjusted his hat.

"I'm Baxter!" The younger one yelled, glasses bouncing as he enthusiastically shouted.

"Our dad said he talked to your dad and they want us to play together." Bluey stated.

"Yeah, our dad said that too. Something about 'trauma'." Bentley nodded.

Bluey rolled her eyes, "Do you go to Mr. Dr. Ted too?"

"Yeah. We're there twice a week. Dad makes us go different days." Baxter chimed in.

"He really likes that word, 'trauma'." Bentley added.

"That and 'suppose'." Bingo paused, "What does 'suppose' mean, anyway?"

"I don't have any idea." Bentley remarked. He turned toward Brett who had just finished putting Bradley in a baby stroller. "Dad, can we go to the playground?"

"Sure mate, just let us walk you over." Brett and Bandit continued their conversation as the kids followed close behind. After a minute they were allowed into the playground.

"This place seems nice. Way better than the park we used to go to." Baxter commented.

"Yeah, our house used to be a few minutes from here…" Bingo commented, before looking down.

"Did you guys move?" Baxter asked as he held onto the side of a climbing frame. "I know my dad's doing something with your dad's house, are you guys getting an addition put on?"

"Baxter!" Bentley chided.

"What?"

"Don't you listen at all when dad's talking about work?"

"Not really, most of the time he's just complaining how Mark and Laurie don't do their fair share of work."

"Baxter, their house burned down." Bentley exhaled turning back to the girls, "Sorry, again about what happened."

"Is that how their mum died?"

There was a palpable silence for a moment as it was clear that Bentley wanted to backhand his brother but didn't.

"Yeah, it was." Bluey eventually responded. "Our dad said you lost your mum too. He said that we could talk about it and maybe it would help."

After a moment Baxter spoke, "Do you miss your mum?"

"Yeah. Almost all the times." Bingo said quietly.

"I miss my mum too." Baxter said as he sat down on the rubberized ground. "Especially at night."

"Do you have nightmares?" Bluey asked.

"No, not really."

"I do." Bentley replied.

"What are yours about? Mine are always about fire." Bluey cleared her throat, trying to stop it from closing up. "Sometimes it's in our apartment and Dad and Bingo are gone and it's just me…" Bluey held herself tightly and took a few belly breaths.

Bingo looked concernedly at her sister, "You never told me that."

Bluey shrugged, "I only told Dr. Mr. Ted. He's a therapist, so I'm supposed to tell him stuff I don't tell other people."

Bentley scrunched up his face a moment before he spoke, "Why don't we talk about it?"

"But none of us are therapists." Baxter stated.

"Maybe we could play therapist. They're a type of doctor, just for brains. We've played doctor before." Bluey said looking at Bingo.

"Okay, but I'm the oldest, so I get to be the therapist." Bentley stated.

"No fair, I wear glasses like Dr. Ted. I should be the therapist!" Baxter argued.

"Why don't we take turns being the therapist?" Bluey suggested.

So they did, the kids lying down in turns on the bench under the play equipment. While someone talked the other kids listened and occasionally chimed in. It was Baxter's turn first as patient.

"…which is why I'm so scared of being alone. I never want that to happen. I'm afraid that if people leave they'll never come back. Just like mum never came back when we were at the hospital." Baxter confessed, tightly hugging his legs.

"Dad and I aren't going anywhere, and neither is Bradley." Bentley comforted his brother.

"What happened was an accident." Bingo said, thinking back to her conversation with her father, "No one could have seen it coming, and we can't always be afraid of bad things happening or we can't enjoy the good things we have now."

Bingo followed as the next patient.

"…and I still feel sad, really sad sometimes. Even when I know I should be happy. And even with the feelings jar I just don't feel good sometimes… I know what happened wasn't my fault, but I still feel really sad." Bingo said as she stroked her left arm.

"Have you talked to dad about it?" Bluey asked, hugging her sister.

"No, the feelings jar works for you two; I'm just not using it right."

"Bingo, sometimes things that work for one person don't work for another. If you still don't feel good talk to your dad, maybe he can figure out what to do to help, or at least he can try." Bentley offered.

Bluey was next.

"…so I really wanted to hurt him. Really hurt him. And I don't know why. I know I was mad that he made fun of me and I know I missed mum, but I don't know why I wanted to hurt him. I never want to hurt people, and it scared me that I did. What if I start hurting more people? I can control myself sometimes but the big feelings scare me and I'm not sure what to do." Bluey played with her hands.

"Big feelings are big. We can't always control them." Baxter commented. He lifted his left arm to show a few spots where fur was just starting to grow back. "I used to bite myself and chew at my fur; it was a way I could get rid of those big feelings."

"That sounds like it hurt." Bluey said, looking at the marks.

"It did, but it made me feel like I hurt less because of my feelings." He paused. "I had to wear a cone for a week to get me to stop. Now I draw pictures and I write about when I feel big feelings." He produced a notebook from a backpack he'd been carrying. "I take it everywhere, so I'm always able to do it if I need to."

"Maybe I could try that."

Bentley was last.

"…that stupid contest. I used to love science, but now I can't even think about it without feeling awful. If I hadn't entered mum would still be alive. It's all science's fault, I HATE SCIENCE!" He slammed his fist against the plastic bench.

"You used to be really good at it." Baxter said quietly, "You wanted to be an astronaut."

"Yeah well my stupid science project got mum killed."

"No it didn't." Bingo said.

"It was a terrible driver." Bluey added.

"We wouldn't have been on that sidewalk if it wasn't for my project."

"Maybe not, but you used to really like it." Bluey paused. "I used to love playing with my mum and dad, and I stopped after mum died for a long time. At first it hurt to think about it and I didn't want to do anything, but now we play at home and it's okay. It's different, but I can still like doing it."

Bentley mulled over his thoughts as he heard his father's call.

"Boys, time for lunch!"

"Coming dad!" The brothers responded.

"Girls! That means you too!"

"Okay!" Both sisters replied.

The two sets of siblings looked at each other.

"I liked playing therapist with you." Bluey said.

"Yeah, it wasn't bad." Bentley replied.

"Maybe next time we could play something else though?" Bingo suggested.

"Like dinosaurs?" Baxter said.

"Sure. That sounds nice." Bluey nodded.