Disclaimer: I don't own MÄR, as i have no sense for panels and would never be able to draw out a story anyway.
Loco worries about forgetting. That's the biggest danger, when you're trapped in a baby's body – as you grow up, your memories of your previous life fade until they're nothing more than a dream.
Loco doesn't want that. It's bad enough that she's going to have to spend years with these two, that irritating, stupid cat and the man who killed Halloween; she doesn't want to forget why she hates them. Even worse, she doesn't want to forget that she hated them at all. If she ever calls Halloween's killer Papa, she doesn't know what she'll do.
And Chaton! She absolutely is not cut out to be a mother, Loco thinks as she's strapped yet again into a baby carrier so the cat can go off gallivanting. At least it's better than when she was directly tied to Chaton's back. Loco remembers those days with a shudder.
Chaton's problem, Loco knows, is that she acts only on impulse. She never stops to think that her actions might have consequences.
Loco can't really blame her for that. Chaton has to act according to her nature, like anyone else. Loco just wishes she'd chosen to attach herself to someone else. If she had, Loco wouldn't be in this situation. She'd be happily plotting her revenge with the means to carry it out.
She doesn't want to kill Alan. Not at first, anyway. She wants him to suffer. Right now, all she can do toward that end is poo her diaper. It's humiliating, but her one consolation is that he doesn't enjoy it any more than she does. She relishes his discomfort, because right now it's all she has.
And she schemes. She lays out elaborate plans of revenge, because it both keeps her entertained and keeps her mind sharp. One day, she'll be able to enact them, and by then she'll have many plans to choose from.
She probably won't kill Chaton either. Chaton meant well, and most of the reason Loco is so annoyed at her comes from Loco's own helplessness. She wouldn't mind Chaton so much if only she were able to take care of herself.
The other problem with Chaton, of course, is that she decided to love Alan, but Loco chooses to blame him for that as well. She and Chaton could have remained like sisters if not for him.
But no, Chaton had to go and help Team MÄR, even though she couldn't handle herself, and Loco had to go and save her, and this is the result. Even though Loco is older than her, she has to rely on Chaton for everything. Even though Alan is her enemy, she needs him to care for her.
This is the very worst scenario she could have imagined.
Every time she looks at Alan, she reaffirms her hatred in her heart. This is the man who killed Halloween, she thinks. This is the man i want to curse. Each time she sees Chaton, she reminds herself that it's her fault i'm trapped in this infant's body. It's her fault i can't do anything for myself. They weren't planning to hurt her, but through their combined efforts they've ruined her future. She hopes repeating the thoughts, keeping them fresh in her heart, will engrave them ever deeper in her memory. And then, once she's grown up a bit, and can use her Ärms again, then she'll be able to punish them for everything they've done to her. So long as she doesn't forget, she doesn't mind the waiting.
They say revenge is best served cold, after all.
A/N: I really hope Loco doesn't forget her original life, as often happens when characters revert to infancy, because otherwise i fear for the child raised by Chaton. Alan would try to provide stability, but i think we all know how that'd work out. Of course, it doesn't stop me from writing about Loco growing up with no memory of her life in the Chess. (AKA i'm finally working on all those MÄR fics i started back in 2015 and forgot about.)
