Skit: The homie never shares.


It was a casual day.

Subaru was just about to sit down and have a bite to eat. He had skipped breakfast, which was terrible for his energy reserves.

His meal was different from the usual however. He had gotten bored of eating steamed tatoes on a regular basis very quickly, so he decided to remake a dish from his homeland:

French fries!

Subaru, of course, was not french nor could cook, but how hard could it be?

After many trials and attempts over the course of a month, he had gotten to this point. Actual edible french fries. Salted and everything.

He had coveted some semblance of his old world for quite some time now, and this brought him some fond memories of his past life on Earth.

Sitting himself down with his platter, he prepared to chow down.

[Liliana]: "Hey, bro, you have food?"

For real? Did she really just…

[Subaru]: "No. I don't have food, no."

[Liliana]: "Alright, better question: can I get some?"

[Subaru]: "Dude, I haven't even taken a bite yet."

[Liliana]: "So, after you take a bite, I can get some then right? Right? Right?!

In true Liliana fashion, she managed to annoy him in record time. Her tenacity was worthy of respect. Not his fries, but, respect.

[Subaru]: "Can you chill?"

[Liliana]: "Just give me an answer." That's it."

[Subaru]: "No!"

[Liliana]: "Alright, alright. Gotcha. Understood. Clear as a crystal."

And with that, she sauntered away.

Subaru huffed in irritation. Finally some peace.

He tasted a fry. Boy, were they good!

[Liliana]: "C'mon. I'll pay you back! Let me get some."

[Subaru]: "Can I breathe? No. Get out."

From behind Liliana's back emerged a lute. Was she gonna sing?

She began to play a tune.

[Liliana]: "~Why not? Wooh.~"

She started to dance a little.

He couldn't stand this. What kind of songstress uses her talents to beg for food?!

[Liliana]: "~Why not? I'm not begging for a plate. You're acting like you ain't ate, in this life.~"

Talking about "lives" did not sit well with him.

[Liliana]: "~Yeah, show some affection. I only want a little taste. I know its no KitKat but give me a little break.~"

Did she..? How did she..? Subaru mentally cursed Hoshin.

[Liliana]: "~For real it's only a taste. And what about me. I haven't even ate. They want to know why I don't have no food to eat. Well, I ain't paid.~"

What? Was Kiritaka not paying her?

Questions for later.

[Liliana]: "~This is all imma say. Only one of your frrrieeeee~esss~"

He had to admit, the tone of her voice was impeccable. Not convincing enough though.

[Liliana]: "~So precious. What's yours is mine. Only one of your frrrieeeee~esss. ~"

She was bowing to him at this point, and starting to attract a crowd. Petra and Ryuzu were poking their heads from beyond the door to the dining room. This was getting embarrassing. Had she no shame?

[Subaru]: "W-Why are you on the ground? Stop being weird."

[Liliana]: "~Delicious, when they not mine. Oh look at the time!~"

She pointed at the time-crystal across the room, while reaching for his meal with her free hand.

He swatted it away, not fooled for a second.

[Liliana]: "~Alright. So precious. What's yours, is mine.~"

[Subaru]: "Did you really free-style an entire song just for a fry?"

Well, if she was going to be annoying about it, best to give her one before Emilia saw this.

He tossed her a fry.

[Liliana]: "Finally! This is the moment of truth."

She hopped off the ground, attempting to catch it in her mouth.

She failed.

It fell on the floor…