Skit: Being a side character while the smart characters figure everything out
Another day, another case. At least that's how it was for the great detectives Subaru and his adorable partner Beatrice!
[Felix]: "Well detective, here's the crime scene. We couldn't figure anything out, but they say you're the best in the force, Subaru-kyun!"
Felix was the one debriefing the two this time. Julius had said he didn't feel well and canceled at the last minute. Felix offered to heal him but he refused. Weird. It was fine for him though. He needed to get out of the department and stretch his tail every once in a while.
[Subaru]: "Understood. We'll try and take a look at it."
Before them was a body that was, for lack of a better term, folded like a napkin.
Twisting his detective cap on his head, Subaru thought aloud.
[Subaru]: "This… already isn't right."
[Felix]: "What is it?"
[Subaru's galaxy brain]: "Why are his shoes off? Yet, there's no pair of shoes anywhere to be seen?"
Nowhere in the immediate vicinity could he see the victim's shoes. Even if they were launched, they could only go so far. They must've been intentionally hidden, stolen, or destroyed.
[Felix]: "You said something was wrong?"
Subaru gave no response.
…
[Felix]: "Detective, you said something was wrong? We're supposed to be bouncing info off of each other– hello? Detective? Hello?"
The demi-human was in bewilderment how someone could be so admirable and insufferable all at once.
[Subaru's inner thoughts]: "Judging by the contortion of his body, the punch he sustained could've been devastating enough to knock him out of his shoes…"
[Felix]: "Wait, what'd you find wrong, Subaru-kyun? Hey!"
[Beatrice's inner thoughts]: "'...but they should've fell somewhere near here.' That's what you're thinking, isn't it?"
[Subaru's inner thoughts]: "Yep. Precisely."
Like it was second nature, the two conversed with each other without making a sound. They weren't actually speaking telepathically, their bond was just that strong. That's the power of friendship for you.
[Felix]: "Share the information!" Felix said calmly.
How were they gonna solve the case if they wouldn't communicate?
[Subaru]: "The report said this is where he got folded, right?"
Finally.
[Felix]: "Y-Yes, this is the spot where he got folded back-savage. What was the problem before?"
Subaru and Beatrice "hmmm"-'d in unison.
…
[Felix]: "STOP! Stop ignyoring me! I'm right here!"
Felix was not like Julius, he didn't care too much for putting on a 'knightly' act. He could act quite childish at times, if he felt like it.
[Subaru's inner thoughts]: "That's odd."
[Beatrice's inner thoughts]: "What is, I suppose?"
The cat-boy continued to shout and holler in the background.
[Subaru's inner thoughts]: "On your left. That shoe rack is completely empty, too. Now, what would be the point of a shoe rack if absolutely no one uses it. Do they like wasting money?"
[Beatrice's inner thoughts]: "The chance of that is less than one-percent, in fact."
[Subaru's inner thoughts]: "Good point. Hmm, and then there's this."
Both their gazes landed on the table in front of them, more specifically the dustpan.
[Subaru's inner thoughts]: "Just as I thought. That dustpan is freshly used."
With his experience as a butler to back him up, he had learned quite a lot about household chores and cleaning materials. Thanks to more than one scolding from Ram when he forgot to empty the dustpan, he'd learned the in's and out's of the process and could tell that someone had tried to erase the evidence.
Meanwhile, Felix knocked literally everything on the table over, including the dustpan.
[Felix]: "Listen to me! Subaru-kyuuu~un! You hear me!"
Waving his hands in front of his fellow knight's face, he tried to get a reaction out of him, but with no success. He had never been this pissed.
[Subaru's inner thoughts]: "Judging by the leftover debris on it, I'd say it was used approximately thirty-two minutes ago. Meaning it was used before any of us got here. If the person that cleaned up was innocent, they should've reported this crime. I think I'm starting to figure out what happened here."
Felix was losing his marbles. He tied Subaru's shoelaces together and pulled on Beatrice's drill hair, but nothing seemed to work. Well, he wouldn't give up so easily.
Felix was brushing his tail, exhausted from trying to pry information from the two investigators. He'd given up, and fairly easily, too. Now he understood why Julius canceled last minute. This was so unfair; he could be spending time with Crusch right about now.
[Subaru]: "I think we figured it out. It's the janitor."
[Felix]: "Huh? Say what?"
[Beatrice]: "The person we're after. It's the janitor, in fact."
[Felix]: "What makes you say that?"
Felix looks over to the janitor. He seemed like a nice enough guy. He even greeted them when they walked in.
[Subaru]: "No time to explain. We have to catch him. Now."
[Felix]: "You've had this whole time to explain. What are you talking about?"
The janitor grinned, evilly. It seemed like the jig was up. He had been eavesdropping on the conversation the entire time!
Thinking three steps ahead, Subaru and Beatrice made sure to not talk out loud so that they wouldn't arouse suspicion from any potential suspects before they were 100% sure that they had the right guy. This 4-D chess match was in their favor.
[Janitor]: "I'll do it again! I swear I'll do it again!"
With haste, the janitor was prepared to fight to the death.
[Subaru]: "Get him. Get him now! I knew it, you fiend!"
[Beatrice]: "Minya! Surrender now, I suppose! Minya!"
Magic spells engulfed the room as a fight of epic proportions was under way.
Felix was tired, so, so tired. From start to finish this case made no sense to him. On second examination, the janitor did have really nice shoes on. Oh, well. It was probably unimportant.
It seemed like they had it handled, so a tired Felix, with his tail between his legs, walked back home.
A/N: These were really fun to write. Beatrice got her moment last chapter with the stack of books and Subaru got his with the dustpan. Couldn't have turned out better.
