Skit: Dropping a bottle cap, but face down.


The night was full of festivities as the celebration of Subaru's knighting was underway. The Emilia camp had been through their fair share of troubles, so some relaxation was just what they needed to unwind after the stress they went through at the Sanctuary.

He had even gotten the chance to dance with his precious Emilia-tan. What more could he ask for… well, besides Rem waking up?

He was getting thirsty. What better way to fix that than with a drink?

He strolled across the dining room

[Subaru]: "Hold on everyone. I'll be right back."

On another corner of the room sat a mini freezer. It worked through some type of fire magic reducing the internal temperature to keep things cold. He wasn't really sure. What was important was that beverages were inside.

He picked up a cool, crisp 1-Liter bottle of water.

He gripped the cap, impatiently awaiting for the contents inside.

He couldn't pry it open. It was stuck.

[Subaru]: "Man, who tightened this? Reinhardt?"

Knowing full well how crazy his redhead friend's grip strength was, he wouldn't be surprised if this bottle was made specifically with him in mind. Unfortunately for Subaru however, Reinhardt wasn't here.

[Subaru]: "Damn it."

He had to do the unthinkable. It was like his mom always said, "it's not about the beginning or middle, what matters is how it ends." He just hoped that quote applied to this situation.

He pulled something from within him. Onlookers would have gasped in shock, the entire atmosphere of the party would be changed with this one action.

If they could see it that is.

Utilizing the unseen hand, now dubbed the Invisible Providence, Subaru once again tried to open the bottle. He wasn't about to be pushed around by some plastic!

[Subaru]: "Hah!"

It didn't work. Even this bottle had more authority than him. Why did this world hate him?

Sighing in frustration, he scanned the area for an item to solve his grip issue.

Taking a paper towel from a roll, he covered the bottle cap and prepared to twist like his life depended on it.

With a sharp twist, the bottle cap came flying off. Mission accomplished.

Wait, that wasn't good!

It's gonna hit the floor.

This was worse than the mabeasts, worse than the Witch Cult. Such a fate was too horrible to describe. Who knows what otherworldly germs are on this floor? His immune system couldn't fight those off. This was life or death!

[Subaru]: "Nooooooooooo!"

Onlookers gasped as they watched the bottle cap fly.

Garfiel, Otto, Ram, Frederica, Beatrice, and Petra's eyes widened in terror; they too realized what a terrible fate this was and couldn't let it end like this.

Without a second to lose, the six leaped into action. They could make it. They could make it!

Ram used her wind magic to propel the cap further into the air. It was a drastic measure considering the area they were in, but if it could gain them just a few more seconds, it'd be worth it.

Otto leapt off a table. All he needed to do was grab it and the crisis would be averted. It was the least he could do to repay the guy that saved his life– twice– after all.

Unfortunately, he tripped over a plate of food, faceplanting right into a bowl of mayonnaise.

[Otto]: "Blaww!"

[Garfiel]: "Haha! Nice fail brotto! Le'me show ya how it's done."

Going full tiger form, Garfiel figured that the increased height advantage would allow him to catch it with ease.

Knocking over tables and chairs, the brolic demi-human smashed his way across the dance floor to the refreshments table. When it came to water bottles, and especially 1-Liter ones, nobody was better than him.

[Garfiel]: "I got 'em. I almost got 'em."

The bottle cap evaded the tiger boy's grasp, leaving him swiping at air. The resulting wind created because of it launched the object right into…

His eyeball.

[Garfiel]: "Shit!"

He crashed to the ground, bringing tables, food, and decorations with him.

[Ram]: "Garf you idiot! Look at this mess poor Petra and Frederica will have to clean."

[Subaru]: "Aren't you a maid too?!"

[Ram]: "Quiet Barusu."

[Beatrice]: "Out of the way, in fact!"

Beatrice may be short, but she still packed a punch. She wouldn't let her contractor be humiliated by something so stupid. She had a plan.

[Beatrice]: "Prepare yourself young one, for you shall fly like a majestic dragon."

Beatrice picked Petra up.

[Petra]: "Eh?"

[Beatrice]: "Now go!"

Releasing a powerful spell, the same one she used to use to launch people out of the forbidden library, Petra was suddenly lifted into the air.

[Petra]: "Wah!"

Emilia watches in amazement and a hint of fear.

Rocketing towards the object of the hour, the village girl hardened her resolve. Maybe if she could successfully help Subaru, he'd return her feelings.

[Petra]: "I can do this. I can do this! For Subaruuu!"

She reached out her hand. Her fingers were only a few centimeters away. Little did she know that her true enemy wasn't the bottle cap, but gravity all along.

She lands on a giant vanilla cake, completely ruining her dress and hair.

[Frederica]: "Petra!"

Abandoning her mission to retrieve the lost cap, the beast-maid runs over to the cake to ensure that her trainee is alive.

[Frederica]: "Are you alright, Petra?"

[Petra]: "..."

[Frederica]: "Petra?"

Moving on.

Beatrice curses her bad aim. She was this close. She should have launched someone taller.

[Beatrice]: "Where is that merchant, in fact?"

Observing the chaos all around him, Subaru has no other choice but to get it himself. He had just learned to put his faith in others, but now he was beginning to question what Satella told him.

He made a mad dash across the dining room, dodging flying food, scrambling guests, and Otto hurtling through the air. It was like everything was in slow motion. His eye was on the prize. This was a straight bet. It was now or never.

He dived forward!

[Subaru]: "Pllleeeeaaaasssseeee!"

The bottle cap touched the ground.

It bounced once.

Then twice.

It rolled around.

It was all so slow, like everything was frozen except for him and that bottle cap.

He was still in the middle of his descent. He wasn't gonna make it.

As he slid across the ballroom floor, the bottle cap slowly settled. Face down.

[Subaru]: "Fuuuuuuuuuccccckkkk!"

He shouted towards the heavens. This loop was a goner. He'd have to go back. It was either that or get isekai-flu and die anyway.

He sat in the fetal position, cursing his eternal powerlessness. First his best friend and now this. It was beginning to seem like bottles were a bad omen.

Frederica, Ram, Emilia, Beako, a bruised Otto, an injured Garfiel, and a Petra covered head to toe in cake also sit around the bottle cap, forming a circle.

Their failure stares them in the face.

BAD END.