Chapter 3: Lies and Rumors
Another bright and early morning at Bullworth was ahead of me, my eyes slowly opened as the morning sun practically blinded me as I sat up in bed. Not bothering to look at the clock I got up and did what felt like my identical morning routine. This was going to get old, and quickly. Back home I used to spend hours picking out an outfit, and now all I have is this stupid uniform. The dark blue was okay but I felt like if I could get one in each color I could be somewhat satisfied. Desperate to change the routine I put some dark blue eyeshadow in my inner corners along with my typical smokey black look. Wow, what a change, not. Since I'm attending classes today I put some extra effort into my hair and various accessories. Finally, I put on some worn out converse and took a quick glance at my schedule. Music and English. Then I was out the door.
Not wanting to start shit this early I quietly left the dorm without checking the lounge. Maybe I should branch out and try and make a few more friends, if I could even call Gary, the psycho that literally put his hands on me, Jimmy who I had barely even spoken to, and Pete. Well Pete was my friend, my best friend at this point. So one friend. Eh what am I thinking, I have real friends back home. This place barely even matters, I'll be out of here in no time and these people won't even matter. The walk from the dorm to the main building was a long one when you didn't have anyone to do it with, almost makes me want to turn back around and call it a day. A tall slender redhead looked me up and down and rolled her eyes as I was walking up the steps to the main building. The best reaction I could offer back was a death glare, but it still felt too early even for that reaction.
I sighed as I entered the school and looked at the controlled chaos before me. It was much like the environment back at the dorms, but a tad bit more civilized. I glanced to my left and saw an "E=Equality" banner,what a joke. Only a handful of people here probably know what equality means let alone know how to execute it. The bell rang and I made my way up the stairs and down the hall to the music room.
Walking inside the classroom I was greeted by a plethora of instruments and an overly friendly teacher. For the most part I was just going through the motions as I didn't recognize anyone, meaning I didn't see my main three people so I kept my head down. I was too much in my own head to pay attention to what Miss. Peters was going over, although I'm sure it wasn't difficult. Maybe my mind was taking me too far away from reality but the class ended much sooner than I thought it would have. Students scattered out of the classroom as quickly as they could when the bell rang. I was the last to leave because I didn't really know what I was going to do with my time when I left.
We had about an hour for lunch and smelling whatever it was coming from the cafeteria made me lose the little appetite I did have. So I'll wander around aimlessly for an hour until English then, great. I totally won't look like a freak doing that. There seemed to be people everywhere, but it felt like no one was actually seeing me. I sighed and glanced down one of the many hallways filled with lockers. I finally saw a familiar face, Jimmy. A sense of relief came over me and I walked up to him a little quicker than I should have.
"Jimmy! What's up?" He was clearly picking a lock but I really just wanted to make conversation, no matter how small it was.
"Oh, hey look, it's Bullworth's very own psycho bitch." Jimmy popped the lock open, looked around some and stole some money that was in the locker. He didn't bother to even put the lock back on but he did shut the locker quietly.
"Excuse me?" Did he really just call me that? I haven't even done anything to warrant that. Not yet anyway. I was trying to maintain halfway good behavior, so this nickname shocked me. Or maybe it was possible I was over thinking.
"Yeah, Gary told me all about what you did." Jimmy halfway chucked and we made our way down the hall towards the bathrooms. What Gary told him? What the hell was he talking about?
"Oh really? What supposedly have I done to warrant Gary talking about me…again?" I scoffed and rolled my eyes. Jimmy was just grinning like he thought I was in on some sort of joke he was playing. But I really had no idea. Gary was the one that put his hands on me. Wait. Fuck. The way Jimmy looked at me, I knew my eyes had just widened, probably double their normal size.
"Well, he told me that you like choked him out or some crazy shit. That shithead probably deserved it. But I just couldn't believe it when he said that you put your hands on him." Jimmy laughed hard enough to make some kids with wandering eyes raise their eyebrows at him.
You've got to be fucking kidding me? That motherfucker. The bell rang. Shit shit shit.
Jimmy looked at me and smirked, "That's my cue, see ya around…psycho." With a final laugh Jimmy left me alone in the hallway and just as alone with my thoughts.
Desperate to get my mind off of the news that was just brought to my attention, I decided to find my way to English class before one of the prefects found it for me. Gary's nothing you haven't dealt with before, nothing you haven't become before. Let it go. Calm down before that person inside you overtakes you again. He's nothing more than a manipulator, just let him play his little game. Try not to get involved.
I entered the English classroom and it smelled odd. It was like someone was trying to keep the room smelling a little bit too clean in order to hide something else. Looking around for a seat I found that I must have been one of the last to arrive because there was one seat left. Not wanting to be the subject of any staring, I happily took my seat. There was a simple assignment passed around and nothing much was really said. The supposed teacher of this class was just sitting at his desk with his head in his hands. Everyone else got the jist that he wasn't really going to be doing any teaching today.
While I was scribbling something on my assignment, I stupidly dropped my pencil to the right of me. It was just out of my reach, honestly that was enough for me to give up and not continue the assignment any further.
"Think you dropped something, friend." Life has ways of making us laugh. I looked up and there he was. Of course he was here, in this class, with me. I watched my pencil get snapped in half, unfazed. "Whoops, you should really be more careful next time."
"So you're willingly telling people you got your ass choked out by a girl? Gary, why don't you tell the truth? That's a much better story anyway." I whispered just so he could hear me, might as well bring it up now rather than wait.
"What do you mean? That is the truth. Or did you really forget that you assaulted me yesterday?" Why was everything always a question with Gary. Never anything concrete, just more and more questions leaving you actually wanting to talk to him more. Or maybe that was just me?
"Ya know I don't know if you fucking dreamed that or what, but I know what happened. You, yes you, Gary put your hands around me. Then your twisted ass offered a truce? Is this jogging your memory or am I actually the crazy one and none of that ever happened at all?" Trying to maintain my whisper was proving to be increasingly difficult. I'm sure some part of Gary wanted me to get angry and cause a scene, but I wouldn't dare let him be satisfied.
"You know, I'd rather be crazy than stupid. You're clearly just stupid, maybe even dumber than Jimmy and he's one of the dumbest people I've ever met. You say I offered you a what? A truce? That's laughable within itself, especially after what you did." Gary pulled down his collar revealing flecks of deep purple and red. This can't be happening, he put bruises on himself? Even if I did call him out for lying I had no proof. What was he even trying to accomplish from this? Did he think I was going to spread that shit around so he had to automatically pin it on me instead.
"What's your motive Gary? I already don't have any friends here. What are you going to do, turn them against me even more than they probably already are? Go ahead, I don't give a shit about this place, you or anyone else here. I know what really happened and now I know what a twisted fuck you are. You're lucky that we're still in a classroom or I'd kick your ass for real." I sounded sure of myself and grounded in my response. A part of me wanted to know what he was going to say, and I hated myself for it.
"You don't have the guts." He smirked and then the bell rang. Obviously he didn't know me if he thought that, maybe he's about to learn a thing or two. He seemed to disappear, I swore I only looked down for a second and then he was out the door.
Not even bothering to turn in my somewhat completed assignment. I was out the door too, hoping to find Gary. If he wanted to play a game then he was going to get a fair fight. Rapidly looking for Gary in turn caused me to run into what I can only assume was a nerd, who had his fly down. The smell that surrounded him was indescribable, it made me gag. He sounded startled as he looked at me with huge eyes only made bigger by the thick glasses he was wearing. I saw he had a book in his hands and I swiped it from him. Then my regular quest resumed.
I was making my way towards the stairs when I saw the one and only teal colored vest mixed in with a sea of other colors in my sights.
"GARY FUCKING SMITH!" I shouted as I got closer. "I KNOW YOU CAN HEAR ME GARY!" Everyone was looking, and with the anger in my voice they were definitely expecting a fight, to see blood. I pushed my way past everyone else and I could slowly feel my blood boiling going down the steps. He was right there, all I had to do was grab him. That was it. I raised the book with both of my hands instead. I swung…hard.
Gary had turned his head mid swing. Whatever book I had stolen from that kid earlier just made full on contact with Gary's nose. All eyes were on us. This also seemed to be one of the rare times when a prefect wasn't up your ass at all times, so this was really perfect timing.
"You fucking cunt." Despite the small trickle of blood coming out of Gary's nose he was surprisingly calm. That's how you know someone's fucked up. All I could do was smile.
More kids started to gather round so this piqued one of the prefect's interest. Not wanting to land myself in trouble this early on in my stay I decided to do the only sensible thing in this situation, run. Once outside I could feel a presence behind me that could only be one person. My absolute favorite person at the moment. My heart and mind were racing. I ran as fast as my legs would allow me. The back of the school seemed like a safer option. I swiftly turned left to this little hole in the wall. The door itself wasn't making it easy to open, it was rusted over and it had a brownish tint. I could hear footsteps and I got the door open just in time. I leaned up against whatever wall was closest to catch my breath. There was little light in the room, that would make it easier if I needed to avoid a certain someone. A couple of minutes had to have passed by now, maybe it was safe to come out?
Spoken too soon per usual, outside light poured into the once dimly lit room. Now what are you gonna do Krista? There's nowhere to run, you're about to be alone with the devil in a dark room. Not wanting to face the repercussions of what I just did, I slammed my back into the wall half-assed hiding. It didn't even matter what I did, he was going to find me. I was going to get hurt again. Maybe this time I deserved it? I haven't felt fear in a long time, but right now in this moment I was shaking like a little kid. Silent tears began to roll down my cheeks as I heard footsteps drawing near.
"I know you're in here. You little bitch." I could barely see Gary, but I knew in this moment he couldn't see me. I was frozen. Couldn't run, couldn't scream, nothing. He walked a little farther into the room and began looking around. I so badly wanted to leave, but he knew where I slept. So what was the point? Not knowing anywhere else on campus where I could turn to was a big mistake. Acting on impulse was one of my weaknesses, and it's really about to bite me in the ass.
Gary looked like he was about to leave, thank god. But then he saw me. How the fuck did he see me? Was I breathing too hard? Could he actually hear me crying all this time and just didn't do anything until now? When I could really make out his face he had a smirk plastered on his face with dried blood on his mouth. He crept slowly towards me, now would be the time to think of a plan. But I had nothing. He stopped mere inches away from my face and all I could do was look into his deep brown eyes.
"Oh there you are. There's no use in hiding from me." Tears we're still streaming down my face, I was so embarrassed. Really? Out of all things you could be feeling right now it was embarrassed. God, maybe you are just as dumb as Jimmy.
He gripped my chin hard and held it in place. It was like he wanted to see me cry, wanted to see this moment of weakness. Not wanting to see the outcome of this I shut my eyes tight, whatever he was going to do I would prefer to feel it. To feel the pain. If I had to look at him while he did it I don't think I could handle it. Then, all of a sudden I was tasting metallic. Why in the fuck was I tasting metallic. Gary and I were kissing. Well it was more like he was kissing me? Did I want this? Gary and I? I was too much in my own head to enjoy the moment because it was over. He let go of my chin and walked out without a word.
What the hell was I going to do?
