Chapter 153 Hoop's the Culprit Part 2
Chief: This is a most lamentable turn of events... After all of our work, how could we still have failed to secure the orbs...?
Ash and the others are now back where the Orbs are stolen, and Ash decides to ask some information from the chief.
Chief: It's completely baffling... The orbs were secured in this case, to which only I have the key. No one has taken the key from me, yet there are no signs of damage on the case... How could they have just disappeared? And where are they now?
Ash: Did you see something?
Chief: Indeed, I was keeping a close eye on the passengers in the time leading up to the blackout. Not too much of anything happened, but I'll tell you everything I did notice. The child, Eustace, seemed to be making a fuss about everything he could- ordering even my officers this way and that for the most trivial of things! I had wondered if he had been trying to occupy their attention for something- but he is just a child after all... Ms. Craudburry was making a similar stink. She kept walking out to the center car, but as soon as she saw me, she would just yell something about the food being miserable, and head back. I saw several others pass by, to and from the dining cart... But thinking about it, a couple of them, such as Sandy and John, may have ended on the opposite side from where they started... I also noticed Julia and that gang leader consorting- whispering a bit here and there. I couldn't hear what they were saying, but I felt it best not to intervene on a date without more evidence. After a time, the lights went out. I sent my men forward just in case and went to check on the engine room at once. It's as you know it from there.
Ash: And what about the suspects?
Chief: Our initial investigation has turned up six possible suspects. First, Ms. Craudburry. A shrewd shrew, we're aware she's engaged in illegal underground trading in the past. Second, Sandy, the Ground Type Gym Leader. While it's a shame to suspect a league member, she's shown a past willingness to violate the law for admittedly well-intentioned activism. Third, former Magma Gang leader Maxwell. His gang has been dissolved, but he has an extensive history of heists, and it's hard to deny the orbs could have a particular relevance to him... Fourth, a former Orderly and Team Meteor operative named John. He was released on bail after being captured during the Agate City raid- lord only knows how he got the funds for it... He claims to have left Meteor behind, but I find it difficult to trust him nonetheless. Fifth, Electric Reborn Gym Leader Julia. We've let her get away with a lot due to her status and influence, but forget thinking twice- we'd be lucky if she thought once about blowing something up. The state of the engine room unfortunately makes her a prime suspect. Finally, Eustace, a child from the Lapis Ward. Eustace has no documented criminal record, but he seems to be a particularly... troubled... child, as well as an intelligent one. A dangerous combination- and it manifests in an apparent total ethical blindness that has led him to skirt several laws already. In each incident, he's been completely absolved of legal technicalities. To be honest, the child is terrifying when he wants to be. That's it- regrettably, it's a full house of fools. There's always a chance that someone else could be involved, but to our research, these six seem the most likely by far.
Ash nods and he has been going through the train and this is all he can get from the other passengers. The first one is the Motives.
Craudburry: What motive could I possibly have to- Ohh, you must mean the motives of the other MAGGOTS on this train! Well, how about that Sandy girl? That RAVENOUS ANIMAL flooded my entire office! I hear she goes to extremes to get what she wants, with no regard to the SENSELESS DAMAGE she causes! She's always going on and on about environment this, environment that- I swear even a MIGHTYENA with a DISLOCATED JAW yaps less than she does! I bet a mangy MUTT like her would jump at anything to get her grimy mitts on the Blue Orb! Imagine the TERRORIST ACTIVITY she could pull with that thing! The statistics she could BIAS! All that power for what?! For a stinking MYTH. BAH.
Eustace: What possible motives could I, a child barely grown into his breeches, possibly have for undertaking a perilous heist to steal a priceless, all-powerful artifact or two? The notion is simply preposterous. I am on this train as it is the first leg of my round-world journey. I'll have you know I have a scholarship. This is for my education and worldliness. Granted, the organization responsible for giving me the scholarship is not aware that they have done so, but I would never do something as foolish as squandering a chance for a perfectly good education. Especially not for something as droll as the Red and Blue Orbs! Even if they are... insecurely guarded... Worth thousands... And unfathomably powerful...I simply would not do it.
Julia: Hi! I'm not under arrest, am I? I'm too young and peppy to go to jail! I have no reason to steal the orbs! Honest! Now, I know what you're thinking- there was an explosion, so it had to be me, right? And that's fair! That's a reasonable course of thought no one could blame you for having! But even I'm not dumb enough to actually blow up the train we're moving on! What if there was a chain reaction and every individual car blew up like in those movies creating a freak accident and killing everyone!? I'm an arsonist, not a mass murderer!
Maxwell: You know, I don't think there's a point in denying this one. Either of the orbs has power enough that could give me the edge I need to bring the Magma Gang back to full glory. That's just a no-brainer, right? I'd just be making myself look more suspicious if I lied about that.
Sandy: Don't tell me you suspect me too! Okay, sure, I've been known to go to extremes for the sake of the environment- And, sure, the Blue Orb has been said to be a powerful water source and together with the Red Orb, could reshape the climate- And... sure, the condition of the climate is a growing threat that nobody seems to either know what to do about or care enough to help- But that doesn't mean I was going back there to steal the orbs! Although, if someone did steal the orbs, they should definitely use them to help the planet. That's just a true statement of fact. Think about it?
John: Motives?! Motives for what?! What motive could I possibly have to steal the Red and Blue Orbs and use them to return Team Meteor to their former might?!
The second one is the Alibi, and these are what they said.
Craudburry: ALIBI?! You DARE accuse someone like ME?! I'll have you know, FILTH, that I am an UPSTANDING CITIZEN of this WRETCHED community, and I would NEVER resort to such a HEINOUS undertaking such as PETTY THIEVERY, unlike GUTTER TRASH such as you, the likes of which would sooner SPEW VOMIT upon the street and SLURP IT UP before ever so much as thinking ONCE about the COMMON GOOD and BASTIONS of JUSTICE such as I, a CITY AMBASSADOR whose very station it is to ensure that SHITSTAINS like you are SNUFFED OUT like a FART in the very wind you TAINT with the MALIGNANT ODOR you call your PRESENCE, and in doing so SHIT UPON THE GRAVE of every RESPECTABLE LEADER such as myself who ever lived before your MISERABLE GUTRAT of a father and the SLOVENLY WAISTCLOTH you call your mother even first decided to COPULATE like the SLIMY ROACHES you all are and thereby DEFECATE upon this PUTRID CITY in the first place, SYSTEMATICALLY DEGRADING whatever MISERABLY LITTLE hint of PROGRESS there had been in the first place, like dumping CORROSIVE ACID on a FESTERING WOUND, HEMOGLOBINS OSCILLATING VIOLENTLY in a PATHETIC EFFORT to heal what little SEARED FLESH still remains, only to be SPAT ON by a SCATHING INSECT who forgot it hadn't SPIT UP its last MORSEL OF BILE! ASS.
Eustace: Yes, yes, if it's an alibi you want, look no further than the flat-brained buffoon standing by the door. I've seen Stunfisk with more intellectual depth than he. This clod refused to let me off the train for what may as well have been hours even after we'd come to a full stop! Sandstorms this, perimeter that! Even while the lights were still out, he was still incessantly annoying! Of course, there's no use in asking why I wanted to leave the train... It's definitely not because I am afraid of the dark... Only babies are afraid of the dark ... And I, of course, am a gentleman.
Julia: Okay, this is gonna sound bad, but I can explain- During the black out... I was ...hiding under a table. It's not because I was scared! Promise! It's just- I didn't expect the lights to be out for so long, I thought it would be a brief flicker- So I thought, it would be funny if when the lights went out, I ducked under the table- and then they come back on, and then my date would be like "Huh? Where'd she go?" And then I'd pop up and be like "Boo!" and I'd have totally got him! But then the lights never came back up and then I thought it might be a while but I had already committed to the bit, and so I thought maybe the lights will stay out for a while, maybe I can just go get a snack while I'm waiting for them to come back, so I crawled out and came back and then the lights turned on and now I'm under arrest, you have to help me, I just wanted to "Boo!" him!
Maxwell: I'd love to give you an alibi. I was sitting right here the whole time. Didn't move an inch, like a good little boy. The problem is, the person who could corroborate that story disappeared herself, Which I'm guessing leaves me in the shitter. She and I were having a lively conversation- no idea why she'd just up and run off unless she got a very wrong idea...
Sandy: Okay, so this isn't the most... positive... alibi, but. At the time of the incident, I was being detained by that officer over there! He caught me over here- just looking for the bathroom, I swear! And he held me up the entire time until it was already too late- Errr, I mean, until the lights came back on! There's no way I could've had a chance to go get them!
John: Pshh- I need no alibi, for I am innocent...And because although I confess, I may have charged towards the storage car with the intent of stealing just a glance at the orbs... I was assailed in the darkness- By all of these boxes... I tripped on one, stumbled back here... Passed out, and then when the lights were back on, I thought it wisest to remain hidden...It was not wise. I may have hit my head...
The final one is the others, as he wants to know if something else is going on.
Craudburry: BAHHHH. I've barely seen a sopping soul besides you and the other busybody officers since boarding this CLATTERING TIN CAN of a train. No one wants to come talk to old Craudburry- No respect for the elders! Not even when she's in the snack cart! What, am I TAINTING the food?! Just by STANDING near it?! Do they think I'm YOU? And the one person who DID show up, in the middle of the blackout no less, was that TITS-FOR-BRAINS BIMBO Gym Leader! She barely even counts as the company on her least- destructive days! BAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAH.
Eustace: Ah, a reasonable line of questioning. Yes, I believe I have evidence enough to implicate at least one other individual on this train, though if you give me an hour or two I'm sure I could gather and plant enough to have the whole company convicted. Regardless, for the current time, I would direct you to that man in the dark robes- John, I believe his name was. When the lights went out, he ran through this place like syphilis through a brothel. Mom told me not to use that expression, but I told her that all language is a self-referential structure of arguments in increasing emotional intensities and I had several more intense expressions ready for her if she tried to stop me. Anyway, the oaf practically tripped over me. Dithered out some apologies, but didn't bother to stop running. Shows you where his priorities lie! I'm sure he was making a break for it straight to the back for the orbs. Go ahead and arrest him first; you can thank me later.
Julia: It was Ms. Craudburry in the Ballroom with the Candlestick! No, I don't know that. But that would be funny. I don't think this train even has a ballroom. Or a candlestick. Anyway, okay, this is going to sound really bad, but I'd rather you hear it from me than him. Me and that guy were totally talking about how we'd rob this train. Just hypothetically! Entirely hypothetically! We said I could go distract the conductor- NOT blow up the engine- and maybe turn the lights out, while he snuck into the back to nab the orbs. But it was just for a fun conversation! We weren't going to go through with it! And for the record, he brought it up, not me!
Maxwell: Well... I hate to do this, but that Julia girl said some pretty suspicious things. She suggested how she could go head up to the front and make the lights go out herself- and then low and behold, out they went. But she was right here when that actually happened, so I don't imagine how she could've done that, unless... She uses an Electrode, right? I'm imagining an interesting scenario in which she bowls it down the center of the train, scoring a strike in the engine room. But I didn't see any of that, so best to discount it. She's suspicious, but I don't think she's guilty.
Sandy: I'm glad you asked! You remember that Ignosia Craudburry whose office we flooded? Turns out she's here, and I think she wants revenge! She started working from home after that, and I mayyy have intercepted some of her personal correspondences... She wants to sell the orbs to her corporate shills! You know that Craudburry woman? I happened to come into some information when looking around at her role in the city, and I think she wants the orbs! Something about selling them off for corporate use- She has a history of illegal trading, and this is right up her alley! And who knows what she'd buy with all the money she could get from selling them! Don't trust anything she says!
John: Hmph... I haven't seen much of the others- except for stepping on that boy as he was hollering about something or other. I swear, that child screamed louder than some of our toughest cases at Dr. Connal's clinic ...Eustace, his name was? I believe I saw that screen name in the CC of the message I received about this train ride. "EustaceOverlord," I believe it was. What a devil child. He was certainly planning something. But I suspect several others of the notable passengers on this train received the same message I did. The orbs were aboard- they could be stolen, it said. There were five recipients of the message besides myself. Someone was clearly setting all of this up, but who could it be?
Ash sighs as he finishes asking the six suspects, so he decides to tell the Chief about what he has found.
Chief: You're done investigating already?
Just then, an officer rushes in.
Officer: Chief! The Red Orb has been found!
Chief: Truly!? Excellent news! Let us assemble at once! Bring the orb, and all of the primary suspects to the dining cart! I'll be there at once!
Ash is still staring at the Chief, and both Pikachu and Squishy understand at how he is suspecting him. But no one notices that a giant ring appears behind them and puts the Blue Orb inside Ash's backpack.
And I'll end the chapter right here, you can also try to guess who's the culprit before getting into the next chapter. I hope you like this chapter and the next chapter will be at the end of the quest.
