Chapter 2

The Frozen-Chosen One

Ron and Harry arrived at the school. When they stepped off the boats, Harry was greeted by an outstretched hand from a muscular, handsome teen his age.

"Dean Thomas?" Harry asked in disbelief. "You son of a gun, you really filled out!"

Dean Thomas shook Harry's hand firmly. "Glad to have you back, Harry." He said and pulled him into a hug. He had put on just the right amount of cologne; not too much and not too little; and smelled like a manly barbershop.

"How are you?" Harry asked attentively.

Dean sighed sadly. "My parents," He said in a sad but proper tone, "Kicked me out of the house, simply because I believe in personal responsibility, not government handouts. The Hufflepuffs are poisoning peoples minds, Harry."

"That's so terrible!"

"It's OK! The Dumbledores were gracious enough to let me live at the school with them. That reminds me, my sister - both in Christ and now legally - has been asking about you."

Before Harry had time to think about it, a young woman ran to and glomped him. He turned red and couldn't think of any words to say. I'm sure that any man reading this knows the feelings I'm speaking of. Men are wired to be visual creatures after all, but Harry knew not to indulge lustful thoughts and pulled her off.

"Harry! I missed you so much!"

"I… guh… uhhh…" Harry stammered out dumbly. Men are visual creatures.

Harry remembered his Sex Ed class at Hogwarts, which was so much better than it had been at public school! At public school, they talked about sex with the boys and girls together and the miscreants in the back of the class kept making jokes!

At Hogwarts' sex ed class, on the other hand, the girls had gone with with Minerva and the boys went to another room with Mr. Snape and Reverend Dumbledore.

"A lot of people think Christians are too square for sex," Snape said, "But that's not true! Sex is glorious! God designed it afterall…. For a man and a woman in wedlock."

"But does it REALLY make a difference?" Dean Thomas asked.

Dumbledore nodded. "My wife had premarital relations with a man, before she was saved. I've forgiven her for it, but she's told me that the marriage vows make our sex better than what she had before."

"You all have a lot of questions, and that's natural." Snape explained. "And you'll get to answer and explore those questions… on your wedding night one day."

Harry snapped back to the present and pondered buying a ring.

Hermione continued excitedly, "My daddy started a Witnessing club here at school! I'm head of the Online Division." She clarified, "Not in a pastoral position of course, but one of leadership that the Bible permits women to." She held up her phone and showed Harry, Ronald, and Dean Thomas all the debates she had won against basement-dwelling losers who thought denying the Lord made them morally superior. "BAM!"

"Wow!" Harry said. Hermione being pretty was a bonus, but what really attracted him to her was her love for Jesus… and her mad apologetix skills, yo.

They went to the High School Wing of Hogwarts. "Wow!" Cried Ronald. "We're men now!"

"And women!" Said Hermione, pretending to be a feminist who always whines about inclusion. They all laughed. Then they went to the Electives table. Harry said, "I'm going to take Mr. Snape's Defense Against the Worldly Arts class!"

The others looked at each other, like they shared an awful secret.

"Um, Harry…" Dean Thomas said, with a firm reassuring hand on his shoulder, "Mr. Snape was fired."

Harry gasped. "What?! What happened?"

Ronald looked down at his feet. "Mr. Snape offended the Hufflepuffs by saying that Jesus was the only way; and the Ravenclaws by sometimes saying bad words to get his point across. Then they started accusing him of all this bad stuff! One Woke Pastor even made a whole podcast about it, slandering his name!"

"Wait I did hear about that!" Harry proclaimed boldly. "But weren't some of those things true? Like his church buying a bunch of his books just to get him on a best seller list?"

"Even if they were," Ronald said, "We as Christians are to rebuke one another in private and in love. Not publicly slander in the presence of unbelievers!"

Harry had to admit he was right. Oh how sad it is, that the World is "canceling" men and boys' role models! They call masculinity toxic and encourage deadbeat dads and and then wonder why this generation can't change a tire!

Hogwarts High School was not the place Harry thought he would be. Maybe he was better off at public school; at least the faculty THERE was upfront about hating God.

He walked to the bathroom to think these things over. But when he opened the stall, he was startled to find a 3-foot tall cherub! Like in artwork!

"Harry Potter is here!" Cried the Cherub. "Dobby is joyous!"

"What are you?" Harry asked questioningly.

"I am Dobby, an angel of the LORD!"

Harry scoffed. "No you ain't! Angels in the Bible are giant, horrifying, and abstract! You're just a wussified 'angel' invented by the Vatican to demasculate Christian men!"

Dobby said, "Watch your tongue, fool!" In the voice of a chorus of a thousand. Harry stepped back. "I took this form because my true form would paralyze you faster than the Baskalisk."

That did make sense; after all, the Lord is more powerful than the Baslalisk so it would stand to reason His servants were too. "Go on."

"Harry Potter, you are the Annointed One!" Dobby poured oil over Harry's head, but Harry backed away.

"Um… what? No! Only Christ is God's annointed!"

"That's where you're wrong, child of Eve." Dobby said. "Christ is the only one worthy of WORSHIP, but the Lord annoints many leaders and prophets! Moses? Deborah? Cyrus the Great? Former President Hagrid?"

"Okay, but what does the Annointed One do?"

"You are to defeat the Baskalisk and drive out the apostates who have produced it and used it as an excuse to take away the rights from Christians! Will you do it, Harry? Will you fight… for freedom?"