Chapter 5
Sunlight shone brightly through glass window panes and super hero themed curtains, onto emerald green hair and tan freckled skin; it gleamed as sleeping eyelids woke up to their morning alarm.
Izuku groaned and crawled out of bed, slamming his hand down on the All Might themed clock sitting on his nightstand. He stood up and checked himself over in the mirror. Damn he looked like a mess. He really cried hard last night...
Better cover up these tear streaks. He didn't wanna have the conversation about the reason why they were there with anybody yet. Grabbing his concealer, he started covering up the eye bags and red marks slowly. Maybe he could try for an actual look today? That might distract everybody long enough to evade the stupid pity looks they were surely going to give him all day. He grabbed some brown eyeliner, mascara, and some muddy brown matte lipstick. He made sure they were waterproof.
Doing his regular routine, he looked himself over before taking it all off and going to the shower to clear his head.
As the water hit his skin, he cringed and started to slowly wash himself. As agonizing minutes passed he began to feel dirtier than when he entered. He shut off the faucet and stepped out grimacing at the slimy feeling on his skin. Wet and dry at the same time. What a nightmare.
Izuku shook out his curls and honestly had no energy to fix it and it wouldn't matter anyway. It was still going to look like shit no matter what he did to it.
He just wanted to go back to bed, but he couldn't. He had to become a hero. He couldn't let everyone down by skipping. That would just make everyone worry more for him. He couldn't have that. Wouldn't have that. So he reapplied his concealer but he couldn't find the energy to care about the rest of his routine. He'd look like a mess either way, so it didn't matter. He got up and threw on his uniform. Damn his shitty tie. Damn his father for never teaching him how to tie one. Damn it all to hell. He walked out of his room.
He thought he'd be swarmed by all of his classmates, worried for him. He thought he was at least a little bit prepared for all of the pity glances and hugs and sweet wishes that meant not jack shit. He thought he was prepared for it all.
He was not fucking prepared for this. Nobody was coming up to him. In fact, nobody even looked in his direction save for a few seconds when he walked in. All conversations came to a cease fire when he entered the room. Astounded, Izuku stood there for a minute before slowly walking over to the kitchen for a drink. He grabbed a smoothie and slowly opened it before gulping it down. Today was gonna be one of those days, he thought.
"YEAAAAHHHH LET'S DO SOME ENGLISHHHHHH, LITTLE LISTENERSSSSSSSSSSSS," Jesus Christ SuperStar, Present Mic just decided to burst everyone's eardrums today didn't he? Izuku tried not to ruin his make-up by crying at the volume.
"Just write in your notebook and everything will be fine, Izuku," he told himself mentally.
Shinso Hitoshi. Hero Name: Undecided. Quirk: Brainwashing. Brainwashing allows Hitoshi to put his target in a state where they are forced to obey all of his commands. In order to activate the power, the target must respond verbally to something that Hitoshi says. The quirk needs to be willingly activated by Hitoshi, who can otherwise hold normal conversations with other people without brainwashing them. He has shown that he can have multiple people under his control at once, but he can only activate his quirk on one person at a time. He also needs to concentrate on the desired target in order to activate his quirk. Hitoshi is unable to have his brainwashed targets perform orders that require complex brain activity, such as talking or thinking, meaning he cannot make them write down information from their memory. He must keep his commands simple for them to be followed. While maintaining no defensive or offensive capabilities, this ability is still extremely useful in battle and could be used to great effect with"
The bell rang. Damn that hurt. It didn't have to ring his ears. Jesus.
Izuku stood up anyways and began to walk out of the door when he was called over by his teacher.
"HEYYYY LITTLE LISTENER C'MERE A SEC I WANNA TALK TO YA!" The blonde was really proving his hair color today, wasn't he? Izuku looked over his shoulder and walked back over to the teacher's desk.
"Yes, Yamada-sensei, what is it?" the boy asked under a polite mask. Smile through the fucking pain.
Yamada-sensei dropped the act and frowned at the boy. Ok now Izuku was worried. Had he done something wrong? Was he muttering again? God that was probably so annoying to everyone. He should apologize. He should-
"You know if you ever need to talk, I and the rest of the staff are here for you, kid. If you need to take a sick day..." Oh, that's what this was about? He was wondering when the shitty pity was gonna start. He actually laughed.
"Sir, I'm fine. Last night was an off day. And I really don't want to talk about it... With all due respect, of course," Izuku actually smiled. Good if he could keep this up, maybe he'd actually believe it himself. "Listen, I have to go to lunch now. Growing boys, right?" Hopefully that was convincing enough. He really was starving, but the thought of food right now made him almost grimace.
Yamada-sensei nodded slowly. "Yeah. Go get some food, kid." he said and they parted ways.
Denki sat down in his rightful seat at the Bakusquad lunch table. It was good to be back.
"Ok, so, Kyouka. I looked at that album you showed me and, dude, it's fucking killer. Like how do you have the best taste in music? Is it a sixth sense?" Poor Eijirou. May he soon know the might of Kyouka's musical knowledge.
"Thanks, dude. I thought you might like 'The Neighborhood', but I wasn't sure. 'Wiped Out!' is for sure their best album, or at least I think so," Ok, those were fighting words.
"I liked 'R.I.P. 2 My Youth' but-"
"I'm sorry Kyo but 'AM' is the best 'Neighborhood' album, because, and only because, 'Why'd You Only Call Me When You're High?' is on it. I just can't allow you to slander that song in front of me!" Denki interrupted. There was a pause where Kyouka and Katsuki looked at him with the look that said he's said something stupid again. But what did he say?
"Why'd You Only Call Me When You're High?" was amazing. It was obviously the best "Arctic Monkeys" song ever-
Wait.
"That's an 'Arctic Monkeys' song and not a 'The Neighborhood' song. Right. I always get those mixed up," he corrected.
"I'm never letting you live this down," Kyouka so graciously informed him.
"Think before you speak, Taserface. Or else I'll start making you study with me again." Ugh, studying with Kachaan was always bound to leave him bruised and beaten and in more ways than one. No, not like that; get your mind out of the gutter.
"One, no thanks I choose life. Two, I'm calling you cutsie nicknames to make up for you clearly watching 'Guardians of the Galaxy Vol. 2' without me," he stated. Don't get him wrong he was pissed about it, but let's reiterate: he chose life.
"Do that and you die," Katsuki and his empty threats. Well not always empty I suppose. Denki liked to picture them as glass-half-empty threats. Not full. That would mean he was closer to the threats being promises.
"Yeah, yeah whatever you say Scrappy Doo," and with that, he checked out of the conversation mentally.
Soon Denki's eyes wandered around the cafeteria, looking for anything interesting, when they caught on green hair and freckles. Midoriya looked bad. Was he okay after last night? Denki wouldn't have been.
He watched as the boy gingerly stepped towards his usual lunch table, looking like he was about to pee his pants. Denki hoped he didn't. That would be embarrassing for everyone.
When Midoriya was close enough to be in sight of his friends, they all called him over to come sit already. They all seemed uncomfortable, but Iida visibly stiffened. Denki watched him get out of his seat.
The engine-user said something he couldn't decipher, and walked awkwardly over to the table with Yao-Momo, Shouji, Tokoyami, and Koda at it. Give the guy a fucking "Tony Award" for his shitty performance, I guess.
Why would Iida even do that? Yeah, the therapist chick told them to give Midoriya some space, but that didn't mean just treat him like he had "Super Cooties: The Return XD". Maybe he took it like she was setting down ground rules? He was horny for ground rules...
No, he had to fucking know that that was a suggestion and not a rule. Damnit, to Iida Tenya anything said by an adult is fucking God's word on drugs. Wow, Denki never thought he'd say "God's word on drugs" in reference to rules.. What a chaotic world his mind was.
Midoriya sat down with his friends, save for Iida, and Denki watched as Todo, Uraraka, and Tsu comforted the boy. He watched Todo offer his beloved cold soba to Midoriya and he watched Midoriya refuse with all the elegance of a sumo wrestler doing ballet. Or maybe worse. Hey, Denki didn't know a lot of sumo wrestlers; they might be graceful princesses for all he knew.
Denki liked to watch the interactions of the lunch room, but it seemed he wasn't the only one doing it today.
"Hey Eij, whatcha lookin' at, bud?" Hanta oh so innocently asked. Said manly man blubbered, face red as his hair as he grasped at straws for a reason to explain why he was looking at the owner of the yellow backpack and fifteen filled hero analysis journals. Oh, and the green sedan. Oh come on, that was too easy a joke not to make.
Anyways, Denki went back to check into the conversation.
"I swear I-I wasn't staring! I know Myōji-senpai said to give Midoribro some space, but look at him! He looks so upset and down and I just wanted to go over there and-"
"Kiss him?" Mina, my platonic love, thank you for your service.
And cue the stammering and stuttering from redhead Midoriya.
"Chill out Eiji! You'll die of oxygen loss if you keep this up and none of us will be able to see our ship sail! Sparkplugs, go with the poor boy to see his man! Godspeed Denki!" Kyouka instructed the boys and pointed at the table where Midoriya sat with the newly named Izucrew after Midoriya's unfortunate outburst last night.
"Vamos, vamos!* I wanna have grandkids!" Hanta shooed.
Eijirou's face subsequently drained of all color as Denki took it upon himself to grab the child by the wrist and drag him over to his destiny as Rhys would put it. They really would never let that stupid joke go, would they?
With that on his mind, Denki continued to drag his best friend over to the Izucrew table. Eijirou wasn't making it easy with all of the flailing and pleas for mercy. Mercy his ass. Mercy came to people that weren't friends with Bakugou Katsuki. Or Karameru-chan as per their agreement. Gotta be creative with the cutsie nicknames for the beast. Actually, he liked that nickname. He was gonna use it more often. Caramel-chan. That was fucking genius, man!
Anyway.
"Midoriya! Hey, dude, we wanted to tell you something!" Denki called over to the table. How long had they been walking? It seemed like forever and a few seconds had passed at the same time. I'm sorry, my good sir, but for what?
Midoriya looked up from his conversation with Uraraka, thanking her for her help last night and whatnot.
Denki again chanced a glance at Eijirou and watched as he froze and straightened up, looking at his crush with a brave- and bright red- face. Denki continued his words.
"And by we I mean this guy!" He pushed the frozen slate of a man over to the greenette.
"Oh, hey Kirishima-kun, what is it? Sit down people are gonna start staring if you just stand there," bless you and your big heart Midoriya. Always looking out for others.
"Why thank you my good sir. Come on, Eij sit down like our lord and savior desires!"
"Ok, ok! Jesus, man, you're pushy today!" Eijirou sat down across from Midoriya and his friends. Denki sat down beside him across from Todoroki. God help the boy.
"What can I say? Humor is my coping mechanism," Denki joked and turned his attention to the unfortunate soul of Todoroki Shoto.
Eijirou rolled his eyes and turned back to Midoriya, immediately losing all confidence when his attention turned to the smiling boy. God that smile. He could look at it all day.
But it looked forced…
"Midori-kun, are you okay from last night?" Denki mentally face-palmed at his friend.
He kicked his friend from under the table and sent him a glare to change the subject. Eijirou did not receive, bless his poor lovestruck soul. He continued on his pity rant.
"I mean you don't have to talk about it, but there are people who care a lot about you, and you really gave us all a scare last night and-" by this point, Midoriya was looking like he just had his whole world crushed and Denki was pulling Eijirou up to drag him back to their table, leaving Todoroki confused about the action he took and about the conversation they had on something called "Daddy Issues" by something called "The Neighborhood"... What? He'd have to ask Ochako-kun later.
Eijirou was soon sat down at the Bakusquad Lunch table and promptly lectured on how much of a lovable, well-meaning idiot he was by none other than his good pal Denki. Wow, uh-huh. Being told what a dunce he was by the local idiot of the friend group. Classy.
"Okay, for real though, how would you feel if you threw a fucking tantrum in front of the whole class over God knows what, and then the next day, one of your classmates did the tango up to your lunch table and said 'I'm worried about you. You scared everyone. You're insane and I'm calling the shrink," Denki explained. Well, he embellished it, but still.
"Okay, I did not say that last part, dude. Stop making things up, it's not manly!" Eijirou defended himself. Did he really sound like that?
"You might as well have, dude. Think about it. Midoriya Izuku. The class angel. Always worrying for other people. Would break bones like kit kats for any of us. Told he scared everyone in class and that he's worrying people. Jesus Christ you might as well throw in that you think he's crazy and call the shrink on his ass!" Denki flailed his arms in the air to prove his point.
Man, Denki looked like one of the balloon people flopping around next to convenience stores. Hah, those things looked funny. Eijirou wondered why they were invented. He supposed they were the world's best "Look at me! I'm here!" sign. They did get everyone's attention on them, and, by extension, the store. So who was manly enough to invent one of those suckers? Maybe he'd look it up later after school... Was he having a conversation before? Shit, Denki!
"Sorry, what were you saying? I spazzed out for a second."
"Are you serious? Jesus, listen to people when they're talking to you! It's not that hard, Shitty Hair," Katsubro scolded.
"Don't chastise him too much, Mom, he's sensitive~" Hanta cooed. Explosion.
"Dear, what did we say about quirks at the dinner table?" Hitoshi joined in. Explosion.
"Katsuki if you set off your quirk one more time in the lunchroom it's detention for you." Aizawa-sensei called over from the teacher's table... Explosion. Fuck.
"Katsuki you did that one purp- hey what's Sato doing with that cake?" Mina asked in confusion. Damn that was a big one. Holy sweet mother of Chadwick Boseman may he rest in peace.
Fortunately for the whole curious cafeteria, Satou Rikidou was a loud kid.
"Hey, Midoriya! I kinda felt bad for you since last night so I made you this cake to cheer you up! Hope it helps, dude. You kinda worried everyone," And he sat the cake down and jogged off, oblivious to the fact that he'd just crushed Midoriya. For the second time. Eijirou saw Denki grit his teeth out of the corner of his eye.
Most of the lunchroom had gone back to eating, eased that Satou thought of such a sweet way to comfort his friend. Or so they thought. Denki and Eijirou kept looking at the face that Midoriya was making behind the cake.
He looked bad. Worse than when lunch started. Jesus, way to go Satou. Not that you meant it in a bad way, dude. You rock.
Denki sighed and looked back at his food before picking at it for the rest of the lunch period. He didn't even notice Hanta stealing worried glances at him or Floofy-Hair McGee angrily scolding him on his table manners. If he had to suffer his old hag's teachings, everyone did.
Soon, the bell rang, again making Katsuki stop mid-scold to wince at the noise. Seriously, what was that all about? Whatever.
Denki got up and put his tray away before walking to his next class with the squad.
For the rest of the day, Denki and Eijirou watched in agony as more and more of their classmates walked up to poor Midoriya and unknowingly shattered him over and over again with their expressed concern.
Aoyama, Ojiro, Mineta, and Tokoyami all stepped up to the plate.
"Mon ami, es-tu malade ? Tu m'as inquiété pour ta sécurité hier soir**,"
"Hey, man, are you good? If you need a sick day, you should ask Aizawa-sensei. I'm sure he wouldn't mind,"
"Dude, after last night, I thought you wouldn't come in today. I mean you really freaked everyone out. Not me though, I wasn't scared. Of course not.."
"Midoriya-san. Are you unwell? Dark Shadow said she was worried about you. She told me not to tell you this, however I consider you my friend and as such I worry for your well-being. She said that you should see the counselor to see if anything is wrong with you. I hope you take this news to heart because Dark Shadow means everything she says and means you no harm. Farewell, Midoriya-san."
As he sat down last hour, Eijirou couldn't help but sneak glances at his crush before he realized Iida was stalking up to the boy.
He watched as Midoriya struggled to look Iida in the face. He looked back down.
Iida frowned. He took a deep breath and softly spoke. "You know if you ever need someone to talk to, you have me. I'm your friend, right?" Well hot damn. If that didn't break Midoriya, Eijirou didn't know what would.
Class started with Midoriya fidgeting and Eijirou's eyes continuing to dart over in his direction every few minutes.
Damn that shitty bell and its infernal ringing. Denki actually saw tears in Midoriya's eyes this time. Fuck.
I can't breathe. Why can't I breathe? Oh, God, I'm such a fucking failure. I made them all sorry about me. God, where did I go wrong? Fuck, I'm gonna die here. I'm never gonna become a hero, never gonna meet the love of my life, never even gonna save one person. God, why did I think I could save anybody? I can't even protect my own friends! I'm so goddamn selfish! Why did I think I had the right to have a shitty breakdown in front of everyone? I should be sent to a mental hospital... Oh, God, are they going to put me in with Toga? What if they do? I'll spend my whole life being bloody and beaten for her! God, I'm such a child. I'm being overdramatic. Even if they actually do that, I'd probably deserve it.. They have good judgment.. God, I'm sick. I'm so fucking sick. I pushed everyone away, now everyone fucking hates me. They all do. I have no friends. They'd all leave me if they knew what I was.. A quirkless loser who stole All Might's power. I stole One For All. Oh, God, I stole it! All Might is probably trying to figure out how to take this power back. I'll go back to being quirkless and I'll die alone. Oh, God, I'm gonna die here...
As Midoriya struggled to breathe, just outside, training in the courtyard, was Shouji Mezou. Already in a reconnaissance stance, they heard the crying and wheezing from their position easily. He didn't know what he was supposed to do in a situation like this, so they called someone who would.
Pulling out their clicker, they sent a message to Jirou in Morse. He just hoped she got the message.
Kyouka was sitting at their desk, trying to write a new song, when all of a sudden a clicker caught her ear.
"- .. -.. - .-. .. -.- .- ... .. -. ... - .-. - ..- -... .-.. . .-.-.- ... .. -. ... ... .. ... ... .-. - - - .-.-.- ... -. . - ... ... . .-.. .-. .-.-.-" it said. "MIDORIYA#IN#TROUBLE.#IN#HIS#ROOM.#GET#HELP."
"Damn," she thought. "I need to get help…"
By the time she got to Midoriya's door almost the entire class was there, casting worried glances at the wood.
"What the hell are we supposed to do? We're not trained for this," Mineta cowered.
Kyouka immediately took charge. No one was gonna step up, so she took the plate.
"Denki go find Aizawa-sensei. Look in the teacher's lounge, the classroom, his office, and his dorm. Hurry! STAT!" she ordered.
Running down the hallways, searching for any sign of his teacher, Denki was sure some of his classmates were gonna inadvertently make Midoriya's state worse. He just hoped he could get an adult before someone thought to open the clearly unlocked door.
Finally, after searching everywhere but the lounge, he found Aizawa-sensei in the room holding a random cat that got spooked when the door slammed open.
"What did you do this time, Kaminari?" he asked, exasperated that his beloved feline friend had left him in this poor mortal realm.
Un-funnily enough, none other than Myōji Daichi sat at another couch eating out of a bento box.
"Midoriya is having another fucking nervous breakdown! What the hell is happening to him?!" Denki couldn't help it; he was panicking.
Myōji stood up immediately and raced towards the boy, hugging him tightly.
"Don't worry, sweetheart. It's gonna be alright. Midoriya will be fine by the end of this, I promise," with that, she let go of him and turned towards Aizawa-sensei.
"Follow me. I need your help on this one," she stated firmly. She grasped Denki's hand and transferred it to her sleeve. "Hold this. You can close your eyes and take deep breaths. I won't let you run into anything, I swear," and she started down the hallway towards the dorms with Denki and Aizawa trailing behind.
Once they got to the dorms, everyone rushed over to the trio, all frantic and scared. No one knew what to do or how to handle the situation.
Myōji turned to Aizawa and started giving him instructions.
"Take care of the children and get them all in a safe, quiet space. Do not put anyone else in charge. This is your job. They've been through enough. Give them each a glass of cold, iced water. If available, give them each a comfort item that they may have. If they start to do anything you deem weird or strange, let them fucking do it. It's a natural stress reliever for them. Don't stop them from doing anything that might calm them down. The only time you stop a student from doing something is if it's going to harm them or others. And I swear to Joe up in the sky, Aizawa, if you stop them by forcing them still, I will kill you. Do you understand these instructions? I don't care if you understand why they're in place, just do them." Well damn. Now Denki saw why she was Karameru-chan's therapist. Fucking hell.
The apparent spitfire continued. "Now I'm going to go see if Midoriya-san is ok. Don't bother knowing on the door, it might spook him even more, and he'll come out when he's ready." she informed.
Eijirou stood up immediately. "Can I come with you ma'am? I think I may have accidentally started this whole thing, and I'd like to end it, too. It's the manly thing to do. I promise not to get in your way. I just wanna help."
Myōji was about to shoot the boy down when she saw the look in his eyes. No one else in the room had that look. That kind of fierce look. Jesus, she kind of had to let him come. They made a mental note to inform Ayron of this kid. Fuck it, she called dibs on adopting this one. Sergei couldn't have him.
She smiled at him. "You may come. But keep quiet. He's in emotional distress right now," she gestured for him to take her hand. He took her arm. She nudged him. "He's going to be okay. So are you, hun," she giggled. The duo walked up to the door with a distressed Midoriya inside.
Eijirou walked into Midoriya's room with Myōji-senpai, only to see something neither of them wanted to see.
Midoriya was screaming and sobbing. Like ugly crying. "I'M SORRY," he screamed.
"I'M SORRY I'M LIKE THIS AND I'M SORRY FOR LETTING EVERYONE DOWN," he was crying between words. God, Midoriya…
"I KEEP MAKING EVERYONE WORRY! WHY AM I SUCH A BAD PERSON?! I SHOULD NEVER HAVE BECOME A SHITTY HERO!" Then he started coughing and gasping for breath. "I don't deserve everyone's pity.. I'm going insane like everyone thinks I am. I am, I really fucking am! I-I need to be put in a hospital! A shrink!" he rambled on and on.
Eijirou was frozen in shock. His mind was gone on a trip to Uganda and the plane was flying at Mach 2. Was this actually how Midoriya felt? God, if only he knew sooner. What the fuck nuggets was he supposed to do in a situation like this? Why was Midoriya only saying this now? God, what was he supposed to do?
Myōji-senpai was handling this better than him, it seemed. She walked up to the screaming child and knelt down in front of him.
"Midoriya-kun, may I touch you? We're just here to help," she said. Here to help... Here to help. Right. They were here to help. So how was he supposed to help?
Eijirou looked around the room frantically. All Might merchandise lined every surface. Figurines, posters, pictures, stickers, wait was that a plushy? And that toy thingy from last night! What was it called again? It looked like a rubix cube without the colors... Infinity cube, that's right!
He looked in the closet. Holy shit was that the blanket Katsubro found last night? That thing had calmed Midoriya down like salt on an oil fire! Eijirou gathered up the objects and set them on the bed next to him. Myōji-senpai was cupping Midoriya's ears and hugging him tightly there. It looked like he gave permission to be touched. Eijirou wrapped the blanket around Midoriya's shoulders and he immediately gripped it like a life force, before he started rocking back and forth again.
Myōji-senpai pulled out a pair of headphones that looked like what you would wear to a shooting range and put them over Midoriya's ears.
"They're called noise-canceling headphones and they were made for people with sensory issues, like his," she explained. Eijirou nodded along, understanding none of that.
"It's ok if you don't understand, hun," she said, smiling softly.
"You can tell me later when we're out of the danger zone with him," he said. They smiled and nodded.
"Can I hug him?" he asked tentatively. He didn't wanna set him off again.
"Ask him yourself. He should be okay for now," she said. They had let go of Midoriya a long time ago because he was rocking so harshly.
Eijirou sat down on the bed beside Midoriya who immediately laid his head on the boy's shoulder. He felt his face heat up before popping the question just loudly enough for Midoriya to hear. He thought he saw the boy flush, but chalked it up to the dim lighting. But then Midoriya nodded and it set fire to both of their faces.
Eijirou slowly let his arms wrap around the boy and they held each other in silence while Myōji-senpai coached Midoriya how to breathe properly.
"Okay, I think I'm good now. I can take the headphones off," he said, and removed them slowly before resting his head on Eijirou's shoulder again.
Myōji-senpai smiled and stood up, grabbing her phone and opening an app before handing the device over to Midoriya.
He looked down at it. Spotify. He looked back at the lady, silent and confused.
"Play a song that helps you calm down," she clarified.
He nodded and quickly typed something into the search bar. A few seconds later, All Might's Christmas album started playing. Because of course it did.
Eijirou tried to hold in his laughter, but one look at Midoriya's face made it all the easier.
"Sorry, Midoriya, that was rude. I shouldn't-"
"Call me Izuku." he said. Eijirou sputtered before Midori-Izuku started doing it, too.
"S-sorry! That was too forward of me-"
"No, no, it's fine! You can call me Eijirou if you want. Of course you don't have to, but it would be unmanly if me to not offer since you did,"
"Yeah totally, totally,"
They both paused to cool their faces and catch their breath.
"Hey, Izuku?" he asked, trying out the name on his tongue.
"Yeah Eijirou?"
"...What happened? I'm sorry if I started that whole thing. It was so unmanly of me,"
Izuku froze. Eijirou immediately backtracked.
"You do not have to answer that, I swear," Eijirou put his hand on Izuku's shoulder, trying to comfort him.
Izuku threw his hands up, trying to emphasize his point.
"No, no, I want to! It's just.." he looked at Myōji-senpai.
"I'm sorry ma'am. It's just I don't know you as well as him. We've been through a lot together and..." he searched for the words.
"I get it. I'm kind of a stranger to you. A really cool, nice one, but one nonetheless. We can talk about it when you're ready. I can be patient," she finger-gunned and took their things. Hugging them both around the neck, she took her exit.
Izuku calmed down a little more. He was absolutely melting into him; he was just holding the boy tightly as they sat there in calm silence for a few moments.
"So I'm sure you wanna know what that was all about..?" Izuku asked cautiously.
"You don't have to talk about it if you don't want to. I'm not here to force you to do anything; I just want to help" Eijirou said.
He saw Izuku smile at nothing from his position on his shoulder. That damn smile could start and end wars for him. He'd fight in those wars for him. He'd do anything for him.
Then, just like that, it disappeared. Fuck.
"You heard what I said during it all. I won't lie and say I've stopped feeling that way. But, if I become a hero, and make everyone proud, maybe they'll go away. I wish they'd stop. Heroes don't feel this way. Or at least they don't talk about it. All Might told me once that he smiles to hide the crippling fear he feels for his job. I wish I could just smile like he does..." Izuku... Eijirou felt almost the exact same way; it was insane.
"When I was in middle school, I hated my quirk. It was weak and bland and couldn't do much. One time, I was crying because..." he paused and looked at Izuku. He was really gonna say it wasn't he? He sighed and continued.
"Because there was a villain and I froze. I couldn't save people. Mina stopped the villain. He was asking directions and she pointed him in the direction of the police station. Then she cried, she was so scared. I just stood there, terrified. That afternoon, I cried and eventually just gave up wanting to become a hero. Right then, right there," he told the boy. He was staring at the wall, unable to look him in the face. He didn't want to see his reaction.
"But you're here," came the voice. "What made you change your mind?"
He looked at his hands and trudged on.
"I watched a Crimson Riot interview. It came on accidentally. The lady there asked him if he was ever scared because he runs headfirst into battle, more so than other heroes. He told her 'What kind of question is that? Of course I'm scared! Show me someone who's not afraid of facing death, and I'll show you an idiot!' It stopped me in my tracks. He continued and told the lady that he was where he is now because he failed to save someone when he was a sidekick. Somebody had lost their life because his spirit was weak and because he'd hesitated. Just like I did... Well I mean no one lost their life, but you get what I mean! ...'Yes I'm frightened when I fight a villain, knowing it could end in my death. But there's something I fear more: the look on someone's face as they die- that's far worse. It's the fear of seeing that look again that drives me' that's what he said. I always hated my quirk. But his was similar. And I never knew what he was really about until then. Not really. I just thought he was cool for running headstrong into things. But that interview changed my perspective. So I trained. I trained harder than I thought I could. I pushed past my limits and got here. I'm where I am today because of that. So you see Izuku, it's not about smiling away the fear. It's about letting your fear fuel you to do better, to be better. That's what being manly and what being a hero is all about," Eijirou finally turned to look at Izuku then. Of course he was crying. Of course he'd said the wrong thing. Goddamnit, he was such a loser. Making someone cry was so unmanly.
"I'm sorry! Please stop crying, I didn't mean to make you cry! Oh, God, Myōji-senpai is gonna be pissed at me-" Arms wrapped around Eijirou tightly and he stopped abruptly. Looking down he saw a mop of green hair and tear streaked, tan freckles bouncing with laughter.
"No, no! I'm not crying because of that! Thank you, Eijirou-san! I needed that," Eijirou felt Izuku smile against his chest and he also felt himself flush. God, this boy was gonna be the death of him. He smiled. He'd gladly take death if it was by his hand.
He wrapped his arms gently around the boy when another thought popped up in his head.
"Is the reason you freaked out today the same reason you freaked out last night?" he asked before he could think about it. The moment was gone and Izuku stopped laughing, but he looked at him with a sad smile on his face.
"I'm not entirely sure what happened then. One second I was frozen scared at Kacchan's outburst, the next, my head was swirling in on itself. He just sort of.. what's the word? Set me off? It was like something inside me broke to give way to crippling fears and... It was like old bad memories came back to haunt me. I'd rather not talk about what they were about... Not yet at least. I don't know if I'll be able to tell you soon or ever... I'm sorry Eijirou," he looked downtrodden. Okay, Eijirou wanted to fight those wars. But Izuku wasn't comfortable with talking about it now and that was fine. He'd be patient with him.
"There's absolutely nothing to be sorry for. I told you you didn't have to talk about it if you weren't comfortable and I meant it. If you wanna just sit here and talk about something else we can. Or we can go back outside. Are you ready to face everyone..?" Eijirou asked calmly. Izuku thought about it and shook his head.
"No I don't think I am. I'm actually kinda tired... I know this is a weird request, but could you stay here until I fall asleep?" Oh his melting heart. Ok, this boy was most definitely gonna be the end of him. And that was a glorious, glorious thing. God bless this boy. And America. Had to say it. Legally obligated to say it. What? He was born in Georgia.
"Of course I can. Do you wanna cuddle too? I'm a really good cuddler. Whole Bakusquad says so!" he grinned.
Izuku felt his heart squeeze and he flushed. This guy... Was Eijirou always this cute? Huh...
He smiled fondly.
"Yes please,"
"Aye-aye Cap'n!" Eijirou saluted and both boys got under the covers and Izuku snuggled up to Eijirou's chest. As the minutes ticked by, both boys felt themselves falling asleep soundly.
*Go, go!
**My friend, are you sick? You worried me for your safety last night.
