Flash woke up the next day, feeling sad and tired. He turned around in bed, reaching for his wife, only to remember that she was no longer with them. Her side of the bed was empty and cold and Flash felt like crying all over again. He and Dale had met when they were young, they had fallen in love and had expected to spend the rest of their lives together. And now... He closed his eyes and pictured her next to him, smiling, kissing him, joking and talking to him about what they wanted to do today. He felt so guilty. If he hadn't so quickly agreed to this trip, they would be lying somewhere at the beach right now, and Dale would still be alive.
He forced himself to get up. April and Rick needed their father now. After a quick shower, he went downstairs and tried to make breakfast. Being in the kitchen was not his thing, and today it was even worse than usual. The toast was badly burned and the coffee tasted terrible. Still, both kids ate and drank everything without complaint. Both looked like they had been crying all night.

„Your grandpa is coming later," he informed them.

Once they had been at the Space Center yesterday, he had called his parents. They had been waiting for them when they were finally allowed to go home and had spend the evening with them, along with his sisters and his niece. He also had called Dale's parents, of course. Her parents were divorced and her mother lived in a different state, but she had been talking to both Rick and April on the phone already. And now Dale's father had announced he was coming over.

Usually Flash had a good relationship with Dale's father. But General Arden had always hoped that Dale would follow her childhood dream of becoming a reporter. Instead, Dale had gotten pregnant with April at a very young age and she and Flash had gotten married. While she had studied journalismn in college, she had later joined Flash at the Space Academy and then started working for the Space Center as well, sharing his interest in outer space. She had started to accompany him or other pilots on their travels, to document their findings and to report on them, doing a lot of research and working as the Space Center's media spokesperson during April's and Rick's childhood until they were old enough to go to boarding school. Then she had participated in longer expeditions and missions, learning more about life on other planets. General Arden, despite being a military man himself, had not liked this choice of a career for his only daughter.

„Great," Rick muttered. „There's gonna be a lot of yelling then."

Indeed, after hugging his grandkids, General Arden went into Flash's study with his son-in-law and startet yelling. Of course he was grieving after having lost his only child and while Flash did feel guilty about going on this trip in the first place, he also felt that enough was enough. He had lost his wife. He was grieving and hurting too.

„Listen," he said. „This was not a dangerous mission at all. It was an engine malfunction that cause all of this. Not all space pilots die on their missions or expeditions. Just because their job is in space, that does not mean it's always dangerous and potentially deadly. While Dale and I did go on more dangerous mission when we were younger, in recent years she did not participate in any of it. Being a space pilot is not like immediately signing your own death warrant. I mean, getting your drivers licence doesn't mean automatically you're going to die either, even though there are more car accidents than accidents in space. But both can happen and... sadly, it did and a person we thought was our friend betrayed us. I wish I could have saved her. I've been going through this in my head over and over again, thinking of ways I could have handled the situation better, but..."

Well, except for not going on this trip at all. That was the worst of his thoughts, because Dale had had other plans and she was dead because Flash had wanted some excitement and fun before going on a beach holiday.

Listening to her father and grandfather arguing in the study, April felt even worse. She knew in her heart that is was her fault. If they had gone to the beach immediately as her mother had originally wanted to do, Dale would still be alive.

„I wish they would stop," Rick said, pushing his plate away even though there was still some toast left. „Yelling at each other doesn't bring Mom back. I wish Grandpa would stop making it worse."

Growing up, April and Rick had spend a lot of time with Flash's parents. They lived in another city but were still close enough for weekend visits and going on vacation together. They always had taken in both kids when Flash and Dale had to go away for work for a while. Dale's mother also had been supportive as best as she had been able to. General Arden, despite living in Central City, always had been very strict. He was a military man through and through and had expected both kids to follow orders without questions, display good manners and be quiet until they were told otherwise by the adults. Still, he had helped paying their school fees and had always been interested in their academic successes and plans for their futures. But on an emotional level, April and Rick always had been closer to their other grandparents.

„He's grieving," she said to her brother. „I guess yelling at Dad is his way of handling it."

„I know, but I can't listen to this," Rick replied, getting up. „I wish Dad would be here with us instead of having to deal with that. What happened is not his fault."

No, it's mine, April thought, biting her lip. My crazy dreams of flying a spaceship and exploring other planets and wanting to be like Dad have caused this. If only I was different... Other girls would have loved a beach holiday, working on their tan, swimming, eating ice cream...

Seeing the sad look on her face, Rick walked over to his sister and put his hands on her shoulder. It made her feel better for a moment but the thoughts did not go away. Their mother would still be there if not for her.

„I'm going for a walk," she announced, getting up quickly.

„Do you want some company?" Rick asked.

„Not now," she said. She felt sorry for brushing him off like that but... she was the one who had caused her father and brother so much pain and they should not have to take care of her. She needed to come to terms with what she had done on her own so she could be there for her family.

„I'll clean up the kitchen," Rick muttered.

„I'll be back soon," April promised and then left through the back door, walking through the garden onto the street and through their boring suburban neighbourhood afterwards. Yes, she would have to return soon. And when she did, her mother would not be there, waiting for her.

Notes: In my version, Flash originally had only one sister named Tracey. However, the „sisters" mentioned here are the sister who are created by James and Amanda for their versions of the story. The mentioned niece is, of course, Sara Gordon, a character James introduced. I felt like giving a shoutout two these two creators here.