Disclaimer: I don't own iCarly.
Author's note: This is dedicated to Cassie Johnsen, Alexandra Remington, KPZ, XXX_no.1, Olivia G, Zelda of York, Emma XXX and Jessica Z.
Finally!
35 year old Sam Puckett is at the hospital.
No worry, she's not sick.
She's here to get surgery to fix her butt-control so she won't fart as much as she's done before.
To do this is something Sam's wanted for a long time, but she's never had money for this very expensive surgery until now.
"Alright, take your pants off and we'll start very soon." says Doctor Amanda Janeway.
"I assume I'll be sleepin' when ya do this, right?" says Sam.
"Correct. I mean, you seem tough, but Doctor Jason Montgomery, the chief of medicine here, has given orders that no patient may stay awake during the surgical process, no matter how strong they might be." says Doctor Janeway.
"Okay. I can accept that." says Sam as she takes off her tight sexy black leather pants.
She wear no panties or boxers.
"You may now get on this bed over here and we'll put you to sleep, Miss Puckett." says Doctor Janeway.
Sam take her place on the hospital bed.
Doctor Janeway injects a medicine into Sam's neck that makes Sam fall asleep.
Doctor Jneway put on rubber gloves and she starts to gently and slowly perform the surgery on Sam's ass.
She is a very skilled doctor and take sthings nice and slow in order to avoid mistakes.
4 hours later.
"Holy shit..." says Sam as she wake up.
Sam still feel a bit dizzy because of the sleeping-medication that wear off slowly.
A smile appear on her face when she feel no pain in her ass.
"Does it hurt anywhere in any way?" says Doctor Janeway as she enter the room.
"No, no damn pain, doctor." says Sam.
"Good. That means everything's okay. You've a few stitches back down there, bur once everything's had a chance to heal, which takes around a month, you can come back and we'll remove the stiches. After that it should be all great. No need to worry. You can still poop during the healing time-period in a normal way. Should any pain appear, just contact me and I'll help you." says Doctor Janeway.
"I'm no longer gonna fart too much?" says Sam.
"The part of your butt that produces farts has been fixed so the amount of farting should be highly reduced. All the way to a normal level." says Doctor Janeway.
"Wonderful. I've wanted to get rid of my overfartin' for so damn long. Never could afford to until now." says Sam.
"Okay." says Doctor Janeway.
"Can I go home?" says Sam.
"Rest here for an hour and then you're fully free to go home, girl. I'll reserve a time for you in 3 weeks so we ca get rid of those stitches." says Doctor Janeway.
"I understand." says Sam.
"A nurse shall bring you water and an apple. You cannot eat and drink too much right after the surgical process." says Doctor Janeway.
"Got it, doctor." says Sam.
Doctor Jneway leave the room.
5 minutes later, a nuse enter the room.
"Hi, Miss Puckett. I'm Nurse Laura Keldine. Here's an apple and a glass of water." says the nurse with a sweet smile.
"Thank ya." says Sam.
"Just doing my job." says the nurse.
"Alright." says Sam.
The nuse leave the room.
65 minutes later.
Sam put on her clothes, grab her bag and walk to her car.
She drive home.
3 hours later.
Sam sit in her bed and watch porn, while she eat a fat jumbo-burger and drink an XL coffee.
After she finsih the burger and coffee, Sam sort of expect farting in large amount, since that's what would ususally happen, but there's no farting at all.
This makes Sam very happy, Almost as happy when she get an amazing fuck.
Finally she no longer have poor butt-control.
"Yes! Awesome." says Sam in joy.
It feels good to no longer be a so-called 'farter'.
Sam txt Carly Shay to give her the great news.
"Damn. The surgery worked." says Sam, who honestly had low hope for success.
With a bright clean smile, Sam dance around a bit.
Then she plop down on the couch.
Her phone buzz in the pocket of her pants.
Sam grab her phone and sees that Carly has replied to her txt.
Carly's reply says "That's wonderful, Sam. I'm glad you've finally fixed your farting-issues. And I am also proud of you, girl. Love from Carly S."
"Awww." says Sam.
Sam grab her electric guitar, plug it into her old amp and play some random metal music.
The guitar is the same one she got at a celebrity auction years ago, the guitar that used to belong to none other than Ozzy Osbourne.
Sam still owns the guitar, never going to get rid of it.
If she'll ever have a kid, that kid will get the guitar when Sam die.
Would she never have a kid, the guitar will instead be given to the Rock & Roll Hall of Fame museum.
Though as long as she's alive, Sam will keep it as her own, which it is, since she did pay for it with money she'd earned legally.
The guitar is of course no longer 100 % the same condition as it was the day she bought it, after all she's used it and lowered the action a little and changed strings on a semi-regular basis, but the guitar still look pretty good because Sam takes good care of it.
Sam is good at playing metal music on guitar.
Her set-up is simple with just the guitar, an old amp set at high gain and basic pedal set at gain as well.
No more, no less.
Being a basic girl when it comes to things like this, Sam need nothing more to play great music.
"Okay. Sexy." says Sam.
The next day.
Sam and Carly are at an Italian diner, celebrating that Sam no longer has a fart-problem.
"It's wonderful that you've finally had surgey to stop your farting." says Carly.
"Thanks, Carly. I wanted to do it earlier, but it cost too much money." says Sam.
"You should've told em and I'd payed half of it." says Carly.
"Guess so, but I wanted to pay it all on my own." says Sam.
"Alright, Sam. How does it feel...?" says Carly.
"No problems. I have no pain in my ass." says Sam.
"Okay. Nice that everything is fine." says Carly.
"Yup." says Sam.
"Sam, you're wonderful, despite your habits that are different from mine. Even so, you're my friend that I like." says Carly.
"I like you too." says Sam.
"Awww. Thanks." says Carly.
Carly wear a purple shirt and white pants.
Sam wear a black t-shirt and red tights.
Both women are happy.
They are still as good friends as they were as teens.
The End.
