A/N: Thanks for reading; your reviews made my day! Your kind words really inspired me; I hope you like this next chapter. Please let me know what you think. Getting replies inspires me to write. :) Thanks friends.


LATER, OCTOBER 23

When she awoke later, it was nearly dusk. Her nap had been of the "wtf, has there been a nuclear apocalypse?" variety, where everything was a strange discombobulated rhythm. "Mom? Dad?" she called out, downstairs. Their master bedroom was just off the living room on the main floor. No lights were on; not a sound.

Kim grabbed her phone from her bedspread.

Two (2) Missed Calls from Sarah

One (1) Missed Call from 360-555-0993

From Dad: (3:44 PM) Don't forget we're having dinner with the VanVurens tonight in P.A...Mom will pick me up at the office. Back by 8. Love Dad

Kim stretched, grunting loudly as she contorted over her mattress. She had totally forgotten. It was 5:30 now.

She yanked off her shirt and bra, and replaced it with a baggy sweatshirt Becky had gotten for her birthday last May. She rinsed off her makeup before heading downstairs.

Just as she'd gotten some frozen coconut shrimp into the oven, the doorbell rang.

Kim didn't bother pulling her hair from its sloppy knot. Maybe it was the neighbors? Sarah didn't usually just drop by, like Tina did. But Tina was off at school.

As soon as she opened the door, Kim wished she could close it.

Looking like a frickin god, standing on her front door step at 5:38 PM on an innocuous school night, was Jared Cameron. And there was Kim, wearing faded pajama shorts with fuzzy legs she hadn't shaved in almost two weeks, a sweatshirt that was comfy but not at all attractive, and a totally bare-face with her hair pulled back like an 18th century spinster. She never wore her hair so tight, ever, in public because it made her cheeks look even bigger than their usual GINORMOUS.

In summary, Kim's everything fell at the sight of him: her face, her stomach, and her pride.

She thought she'd slept away this nightmare day, but here Jared was- back for more, evidently. And now she was the one who was left speechless and utterly mortified.

To make matters all the better, the only reaction she had to seeing him was to croak, "Jared?!"

His eyes met hers and he smiled a megawatt, knee-buckling smile that- had she not been so painfully aware of how awful she looked- would've made her faint. Instead, she tried not to swallow her tongue and to look unaffected.

"Kim," he chirped, happily. Then his eyes flickered downward, and his whole face went slack.

He was staring at her legs. Studying them. She saw his Adam's apple bob. She squirmed, crossing one leg behind the other and trying to obscure the obvious dusting of fuzz over her legs. Why hadn't she worn pants?!

When she tucked her leg behind her other, he quickly yanked his gaze up to hers. He shifted from one foot to the other. In a raspy voice, he said, "How's your night?"

Great, he definitely noticed her leg hair. It was so obvious. What else would be so eye-catching? Sarah was always getting after her to shave at least once a week, but Kim could never be bothered. Now, she vowed to never allow it to grow long again. He probably thought she resembled Tarzan or something.

"It's fine- just, good. I napped." Kim nervously fiddled with the door knob. "Did you need something?"

"Well, now that you say it...I could use a nap!" he joked. When he smiled, his eyes danced.

Kim laughed at his quickness. "Yeah, I highly recommend it." Kim stared at his shirt. It looked a little stretched out at the collar, like he made a habit of yanking it off via the neck.

"Hope you don't mind my turning up, unannounced," he said, carefully, politely.

She didn't reply to it; she sort of did mind because she looked like a slob, but that wasn't his fault.

Jared's lips thinned, and his eyes flicked to the room behind her. "I asked my mom where you lived. You know my friend Mallory lives about half a mile east? I've driven by your house hundreds of times. I had no idea you lived here!" His voice was so light-hearted, but Kim couldn't help but feel a little annoyed at the implication of it all. Number one: he went to Mallory's all the time. Jealousy tickled at the base of her throat but she swallowed it down. Number two: Jared had no idea she lived in this house because he had no idea who the hell she was. That much was obvious in how he spoke of Mallory-as if Kim didn't know her. Figured. The closest he'd come to even acknowledging her presence was calling her "Kate" and handing her coffee to her, labelled by someone else. It just stung that he genuinely had no idea who she was.

Until earlier today, of course.

She kept the censure out of her voice when she said, "Yup, been here since I was six."

Jared's smile tightened. "Right. Um." He exhaled, looking down at his shoes for a second. "My mom said that she worked with your mom on a project a while ago- that your mom helped pick out the curtains after our house renovation. That's cool!"

"Yeah." The oven chirped in the background. Thank God. Kim was feeling like an even bigger loser now than she was five hours ago. The oven chirped again, and Jared's keen eyes sharpened on the space behind her at the sound. "Oh, um- I've got to get that, but, was there a reason you...needed to see me?"

Jared's whole face melted into that wonderstruck look again, and he just answered, "Yes. I really needed to see you because I can't stop thinking about y- about what you said earlier."

Kim shoved her glasses further up the bridge of her nose. "About….?"

"Just, everything you said, honestly."

"Okay." Kim felt her face coloring. Why did she seem so awkward around him? "Well, I feel like it all came out wrong, but I guess if it doesn't bother you…" She cleared her throat. "If you need help with the book at all, let me know. Happy to help."

"You're such a sweet person, Kim," he said in a low, raw voice that made her heart patter. He scratched the corner of his lip with his thumb, before clearing his throat to say, "I'd like to take you to dinner. Please."

Was this real life? Any minute, she'd wake up flat on her bedspread. "Why?"

"I told you earlier. I want to get to know you," he replied simply.

"I can't get dinner," she replied. "I have to get my dinner out of the oven. And I'm...not dressed to go anywhere. I'd need a half hour to get freshened up, and by then..." She had to stop herself bodily from yanking her topknot out.

"Well- maybe you'd join me for coffee or- or dessert, then?" he tried again. "I think you look great, but I understand if you'd prefer I come back in a while."

She was side-eying him now. "Is there a catch?"

Jared looked at her cluelessly.

Instead of rehashing the reasons he should be upset with her, or frustrated with her, Kim simply stared him down for a good forty seconds. He didn't budge in his earnestness.

Either he was really really good at playin', or...he was being sincere.

"You- you really wanna go?"

He breathed out, and said in an almost unnervingly imploring tone, "More than I can possibly say."

Kim mashed her lips together. "Where do you, uh, wanna go?"

"Have you ever been to Cafe Angel in PA?" he asked.

She stiffened. When no recognition seemed to dawn on him, Kim, in a quiet voice, answered, "Yeah. I'd be okay with that. If you give me time to eat and get dressed again."

Jared expelled a heavy, happy breath of air, whistling low. His whole face seemed to glow. "Awesome! Kim, I swear you won't regret it. Is 6:30 okay?"

Kim had shut the door, checked her pulse first to make sure this wasn't some weird after-death fantasy, and then dressed in a pair of burgundy jeans, a loose grey tee, and a cardigan. She'd put on her best earrings- a pair of gold mini-hoops with actual diamonds in them- and tried to fluff up her hair but it was useless. He'd already seen her literally at her scrubbiest, though, so she sort of huffed a sigh and gave up by tossing it into a loose ponytail before darting downstairs to shovel in her shrimp, and anxiously watch the clock for 6:30. She sent her parents a text, letting them know she'd been asked out for a coffee.

She wondered if they'd believe her.

Becky was always popular with the boys, and her folks had gotten used to her sister's parade of boyfriends before Graduation...but Kim had no such dance-card to show. Maybe they'd actually be excited that some male was showing interest.

Kim waved awkwardly as she stepped onto the porch, just as Jared's headlights illuminated the side of her house.

She'd forgotten how long the drive was to Port Angeles, though, until she was sitting next to Jared in his white Nissan Armada, wondering what to say next. She was surprised, though, at how quickly they sank into a comfortable conversation. She'd complimented his SUV, and he'd asked her what she drove, and then they started talking about first cars...which segued into chatting about their drivers' ed experience, and general school talk, and his experience on the Football team and hers on the Yearbook...and then the hour and fourteen minutes was over, and they were walking into Cafe Angel. Where did the time go? Kim smiled to herself as they exited the car. She was looking so- so confident! Maybe it was as her mom always said...you are what your positive thinking manifests. Why had she been so afraid of talking to guys her entire school career? They weren't so bad; talking to Jared, after she got over the initial shock, was...fun. Boys weren't the terrifying enigmas they'd always seemed. Hell, maybe she'd purposefully make a guy friend before Graduation. Talk about growing up.

They took their place at the counter. "You look really pretty," Jared said, softly, reaching for his wallet. Kim turned to look at him, lips forming an "o" of surprise.

She didn't want to sabotage herself- after all, she was on this high of positive thinking manifestation- but...really? She looked nice (as in, decent enough to leave the house and pick up coffee at 7 PM, sure) but "really pretty?" In casual clothes and flat hair? When before today, she'd been one step up from invisible to him?

Why was he being so nice to her? Kim studied his face, and the dimple slowly forming there, and his perfect lips and steel-cut jaw...and found herself wordless.

"What can I get you?" asked the girl behind the counter.

"I'll do an Americano with half-and-half steamed in. For here." Jared pressed a hand to Kim's back.

She nearly shivered at the contact, though his touch was anything but cold. She was still puzzling over this- all this, and the fact that she was here in Port Angeles with Jared at all- when his big hand seemed to press, his palm flattening in more contact on her back than just a gentle brush of reminder. He stepped closer, and...was that his face so near her hair? He inhaled. Her breath nearly caught.

This definitely didn't look like simple friendly behavior to the barista, Kim was sure.

"What'll you get?" he murmured to Kim, his breath stirring her hair.

Kim was staring at the barista with a look of total surprise, heart hammering in her ribs, and didn't know how to react to any of it. So she managed to croak out, "I'll do the marshmallow latte, please."

Just as she felt Jared go stock-still beside her, and his hand tense on her back, the barista chirped, "Excellent. Grab a table and someone will bring it to you."

Kim took a step away, feeling redness flood her face to the roots of her hair, and began to make her way back to a table near the window. Her phone buzzed in her purse, and she pulled it out to check. Another missed call from Sarah. What would her friend have to say after she explained this wacky day to her?

Her back still seemed to tingle where Jared's heated hand had been.

Jared made his way toward her. He wasn't making eye contact, but fiddling with his wallet. "Did you miss a call?"

"Yeah-just my friend. And some number I don't recognize, from earlier." She slipped it back in the outer flap.

"Uh, that was me," Jared murmured, a bit sheepishly. He glanced up at her, with those warm dark caramel eyes. "I got your number from Jill Redwood. I hope you don't mind."

The blush came back with a fiery vengeance but Kim tried to play it cool. "Oh. I guess not."

"Hey, Kim?"

She looked up at him, at his features twisted with remorse.

"Uh- you and I have been here before, haven't we?" Jared sank back in his seat, eyebrows pitched as if he expected bad news.

"Yeah," she responded. She picked at a fingernail. "A few years ago."

"And you ordered the marshmallow latte, then, didn't you?"

"I always do. They're really good," Kim said, casually, eyes flitting over the decor in an attempt to keep things light-hearted. She'd already made him feel enough like a shit-head, today, and she herself had felt like a Loser with a Capital L so often that she was sure she'd develop an ulcer. Manifest positivity, or whatever!

"Fuck," he swore, low, and scrubbed his hands over his recently-shorn hair. "I can't believe I forgot about that. And- I probably acted like a total asshole that day, didn't I?"

Kim made a weird, noncommittal laughing sound in the hopes that he'd drop it, but he continued to watch her with such intense scrutiny that she finally squeaked, "Not a total asshole. Just distracted."

"God." Jared slumped forward. "I shouldn't have been such- Christ."

"It's cool." She meant it, too. Gently, she admitted, "It's not like we're friends or anything, Jared. But we can still be cool with each other."

Jared was staring hard at his hands, which were aimlessly fidgeting on the table. "I'd like to be friends, though."

This was so weird. Still, Kim said agreeably, "Okay. We can be friends then." Truly, she could forgive him for his douchey-ness the past...well, like, decade. She'd held on so long, and had so hoped that his softer heart would be revealed...now that it finally was, it would be unfair for her to turn a cold shoulder. And there, just like that, her new goal of making a male friend before College started- God she was such a dweeeeeb- was complete. Not bad progress.

Jared released a breath of relief, as if it was truly pent up with apprehension of her answer.

Kim turned to see if their drinks were en route, but the barista was just beginning to work on them.

"I think you're incredibly smart, Kim," Jared said, reverently, drawing her focus back to him. "Tell me more about you."

"That's nice to say. Thank you. I don't know what else to tell you though," she confessed. "Umm...I have a sister named Becky. What about you?"

"A sister, too. Alyssa. Four years older."

"You close?"

"Eh, sure. She's cool. She's having a baby next spring, which my parents are excited for. Me, too, actually." Were his cheeks pinkening too? "So, do you like kids?"

"Yeah, kids are great. I volunteered with the local girl scout group all last year and will do it again after Christmas. The youngest ones are called Daisies and I think it's so cute." Kids weren't judgmental at that age; they were so easy to enjoy, to talk to. They were curious about everything. Kim actually looked forward to helping out with Troop 633 again, more than she could say. "Do you like kids?"

"That's awesome. I love kids too. I always thought I'd like to have a bunch of them, someday. " Why was he blushing? Jared pushed a hand through his hair- his much shorter hair. "Do you have a job?"

"I work at the Public Library," she answered. "This past summer I worked every day for a few hours, but now that school has started again...they just have me on Saturday mornings for now." She needed to limit her hours, after all. Her classes were quite the time-suckers.

"I used to love the Library when I was a kid."

"Oh?" He was way more conversational than any of the other times they'd tried to talk. He actually returned questions this time, and was looking at her like he couldn't wait to hear her response.

"Yeah." One side of his mouth lifted in a smile. "I can't remember the last time I was there to be honest. Though I do like to stop in to the Media Center at school. The Librarian there- Ms. Tumms- is my neighbor. I like to stop and give her a hard time."

"Yeah, I've seen you helping her out before," Kim said, returning the smile. She tried not to sound gushy. Seeing Jared interact with her remained one of the cutest things to happen regularly at La Push High School. "It's really sweet."

Jared's face definitely flushed then, and his eyes did that huge-pupil thing again. "Thank you. That means a lot, coming from you."

Kim felt her cheeks start to grow hot, too. Awkwardly, she changed the subject. "Do you have a job too?"

"Yeah." He seemed to snap out of it. He sat back against the chair, blinking several times and his fingers drumming on the table. "I work for the Rez. Sam Uley is kind of like- my supervisor, I guess. We do stuff for the...Council."

Kim didn't know much about official Council business, other than what her parents talked to her about occasionally, whenever one of the tribal newsletters showed up in the mailbox. "Oh? Like filing and stuff?" She assumed it was like any clerical, administrative government work.

Jared's eyes sparkled with mirth. "No, more like patrolling the land. Security."

"Oh, I see. Sort of like...protecting the environment?" She thought about wandering tourists, or vandals. "Keeping an eye out for trouble?"

"Exactly. Things like...illegal poachers." Jared's eyes dropped.

"How long have you been doing that?"

"Not long. About...about a month, I guess."

"Weren't you sick most of the month?"

"Oh, well, yeah- I worked though, when I was sick…" He cleared his throat. "Someday I'd love to show you more of what I do. I get to be outside a ton, which is good. Are you outdoorsy?"

"Yeah, I like the outdoors. Especially if I'm in a hammock reading. So I wouldn't say I'm outdoorsy, per say. I like doing indoor things outside though."

He seemed to be studying her face again with that warm gaze. "You love reading, huh?"

"I do." She paused, then said, "Do you- uh, remember when we were reading partners back in second grade?"

When his face went totally blank, she felt like such an idiot. Undoubtedly her ginormous cheeks were blazing red, so Kim hastily said, "Nevermind, it was like a million years ago. I just remember telling you I was going to be a Librarian one day, so, I- I don't know, it just popped up in my brain. Silly memory. There really wasn't anything substantial I had to add...on that anyway…"

"I think I do remember that." Jared's voice was quiet, his lips parted thoughtfully. "Did I tell you your eyes were like Coca-cola?"

She laughed, surprised. "You did!"

Jared grinned at her laughter. "I was smooth, huh?"

"Of course. I mean, it stands out in my memory at least!" She laughed again, hoping that didn't make her sound like a creep. If she didn't think about it too much, joking with him felt a bit like joking with Tina...easy, immediate. But. What if- her brain started to over-examine. Trying to play it cool again, she added, "I don't know- uh, why I remember- that."

"I'm glad you do," Jared said, quietly, with his white even-toothed smile dazzling her. "Did I mention how happy I am that you came out with me tonight?"

As friends, she almost wanted to add, with a touch of uncertainty brushing her skin. Was this the sort of thing he did with Amanda and Mallory and his various, faceless Forks girlfriends? Or was this really the way he'd treat a friend? Kim felt all sorts of clueless, of inexperienced.

A cafe worker appeared then, setting down their drinks on the table.

They continued trading general questions back and forth- like, "What's your ideal meal?" which got an answer so long and detailed that Kim was left a little confounded that Jared didn't weigh 500 lbs, and "Favorite movie?"- while they sipped their coffees. Yet again, Kim was stricken with the realization that talking with Jared was so easy.

"What are you doing after Graduation?" she asked out of curiosity. "Any college football in your future?" That was what most football players did, right? Especially when they were celebrated at their high school. She worried then that maybe he hadn't gotten one- he was good for La Push, and for this remote part of Washington, but maybe he wasn't remarkable enough for a scholarship when he was part of a bigger pool. Kim nearly opened her mouth to say, not that you have to! when Jared answered.

His sigh wasn't one of resignation...more like, acceptance. "Not in my cards. I'm sticking around here, where I'm needed. This job for the Council means a lot to me. So I'll probably do some online courses or something. Business or something."

To be honest, that was a little surprising. But, for someone like Jared who was universally adored by the residents of La Push...maybe staying in his hometown, and continuing a Legacy of tradition that clearly meant a lot to him, was a good move.

"Well, good for you." She looked at him again. He did look so much more grown up now. He looked like a guy who had been working for the Council for years, whose eyes reflected wisdom and awareness. "I think it's important to find something you're passionate about. "

Jared got that subtle glow to his cheeks again; then, after a sip of coffee, he asked seriously, "What are your Graduation plans, Kim?"

"I was accepted in first-round admission to Western Washington for my undergrad."

His brows quirked over the rim of his coffee cup. "Undergrad?"

"Yeah. I'd like to be an optometrist one day...so WWU is the first stop for me, with a lot of years ahead of me for school."

Jared listened closely, a frown settling on his face. "Oh yeah? That- that's good. How many years does a person have to get through to...be an optometrist?"

"Hopefully seven years, if I bust my ass in my APs this year and can get my undergrad done in three. That would be the quickest track, if I'm able to do it." She took a long gulp of coffee, noticing Jared's hands tighten around his own drink.

"Seven years?" he echoed. "Away at school?"

"Yeah. It felt like a long time to me, when I first decided on that...but luckily WWU offers great prep work on that. I think I'd be able to keep to this area...only a few hours from home at any given time. I don't know why, but it's hard to imagine being too far, if that makes any sense."

Jared was staring again, but this time, his expression was brooding. "I totally get that. It's hard to think of you being so far from La Push. You sure it's, uh, what you want?"

"Yeah." She was certain, through and through. "My dad thought all the schooling required would put me off, but I've already worked out a practicum with Dr. Gearling's office here in PA. I just can feel it's right. It'll take me nine years at most, but I'm sure I can do the fast-track. Then I'll probably come back."

Jared nodded, looking halfway disturbed and halfway placated for some reason. "Well...at least, like you said, you're close by. If you're in Washington, you can be back as much as you want, really. I mean, if you were, like, homesick or anything."

Kim tucked a piece of hair behind her ear that had come loose. "Yeah, at least until I finish my degree in Oregon."

Jared's jaw swung loose. "Oregon?!"

"It's not that far," she said, defensive and a little perturbed that he was so aghast. "It's just about as far as WWU, but south. No more than six hours. It's- a top program. I'm going to be fine. I'll get in, if I apply myself."

He scrunched his face, scrubbing his palm over his forehead. "I have no doubt you'll get in and be great. You're so frickin smart, Kim. It's just- Graduation seems so, so close. It's...weird hearing you be so...ready to go."

She hoped she hadn't insulted him, somehow making him feel bad that he was sticking close to home. Confused, she stared down into her latte.

Jared cleared his throat again. "So you're in a ton of AP classes. Lots of studying?"

She nodded, and took a drink. For some reason, Jared seemed...disappointed. Kim thought maybe now was a good time to stop talking. She couldn't explain the sudden foreign heaviness in her chest.

"What...do you do, other than studying?"

She glanced up to check and see if he was mocking her. He looked genuinely curious. "Well, we covered the whole reading thing…"

A slow smile that gleamed with charisma spread over his lips. "We did." Her heart pitter-pattered.

"Well, I also love kayaking if it's-"

"Jared?" a tearful voice asked.

Jared whipped around just as a pair of girls approached. Both were very pretty. The taller, thinner one had large, fern-colored eyes that were blood-shot; Kim guessed she was the one who spoke, whose voice sounded hoarse and watery. Despite being upset, she was still gorgeous. Her thick hair was sandy-colored, and curly. She wore one of those athletic, thin headbands and a fashionable white cargo jacket. She was white, but her skin had a lingering sun-kissed tone and indicated many days spent at the beach this past summer. Her attention was totally trained on Jared.

Her friend was part-Asian and stood close to her shoulder. She wore lip-gloss and had a small diamond stud in her right nostril. While she was mostly looking at Jared, too, she did spare a glance- and then a second- at Kim, before setting her shoulders back and pinning her gaze back on Jared.

He swallowed, darting a glance at Kim, then back at the two girls. Carefully, he said, "Hi Autumn. Monica."

At his voice, Autumn's bottom lip quivered minutely. Her green eyes were so large and innocent that Kim was reminded of a doll. "Um. I was hoping...we could talk."

With a quiet lace of anxiety in his voice, he gently said, "Can we talk another time?"

Autumn looked about ready to burst into tears, but was spared having to speak as her friend, Monica, cut in. "She'd love to, Jared, but you haven't answered any of her calls today."

Miss Forks, exhibit one. Kim's insides turned to stone.

"Please, let's- just talk for a minute or two?" Autumn asked again. "I don't know what's going on, Jared, but I really really need to just, like, talk."

"Not now, Autumn."

A tear streamed out from Autumn's right eye, streaking a bit of mascara. "What did I do wrong?"

"Autumn-" Jared turned his face, staring up at the ceiling. It reminded Kim of how he'd looked earlier today, when he'd snapped at her about not reading Heart of Darkness and was annoyed at her. Before he had a sudden, magical change of heart, Kim thought, with a buzz of suspicious resentment.

"You stopped talking to me after Homecoming, and then we were cool last week again, and then...what, now it's over?" Autumn's voice pitched a little higher, cracking. "Did you just want to fuck me a few more times before cutting me off entirely or something? Got what you wanted and now I'm back out to the curb? Is that it?"

At the word "fuck," Jared's dark eyes shot up- to Kim. Kim quickly looked away. This was none of her business. She fidgeted with discomfort. Another reminder of Jared's true nature- regardless of how easy he was to talk to. That reality kept confronting her at every hour. Now it was standing beside her, trembling with sadness and Kim felt terrible.

Through gritted teeth, Jared addressed Autumn again, but didn't look away from Kim. "I said we can talk later."

"No, you'll talk now," Monica bit out, wrapping an arm of support around Autumn. "This poor girl drove to your house to try and talk to you. Your mom said you were in PA, so we hauled our cookies all the way over here to get some answers. You can take five minutes of- whatever you're doing- to talk to your girlfriend."

Jared looked like he wanted to say something, but before he could, Autumn's attention finally drifted to Kim. "I'm sorry, who are you, anyway?" the blonde girl asked. She didn't look at Kim with any animosity, just pure blankness.

"Uh, I'm K-Kim," she stuttered, trying to keep her mortification at bay. "I'm Jared's partner in English class."

Both girls' faces flickered with bafflement for an instant, but thankfully, their focus was quickly drawn back to Jared. Kim realized that they certainly didn't perceive this as a date, and didn't perceive Kim as any kind of threat. Maybe she should've felt insulted; instead, relief flooded her.

"I don't want to interrupt your homework, Jared. I just- when your mom said you were in PA, I assumed you were with Mallory again, and after- after your text-" now Autumn looked embarrassed.

Monica refused to back down. "After how short you were with her, and totally uncommunicative, I told her she deserved some answers from her boyfriend of five months. So why don't you two take some time to talk?"

"I'm here with Kim," Jared said, not even bothering to hide the anger in his voice. "You're being rude to her, barging in, uninvited. Nothing has changed since my text message earlier, Autumn. I'll call you later, if you need to hear it clearly."

Autumn's tears were flowing again. Kim's chest throbbed in sympathy. It was easier to be jealous of Jared's girlfriends when they were faceless ideas, like the past. Watching this beautiful girl- who most guys who kill to have on their arm- weep in confusion publicly while her ex sat unmoved (even, annoyed)- was sending heavy waves of guilt through Kim.

She didn't know what she had to be guilty over, but...the feeling was undeniable. As subtly as possible, Kim tried to push away from the table and make a graceful exit. With supernatural quickness, Jared was reaching across the table to stop her. His hand wrapped around her forearm. Panic painted his expression. "Wait, no-"

"I'm going to take off, and let you guys, uh- t-talk things out," Kim said. She cursed herself for the stammer that bled into her voice. It did that sometimes when she was uncomfortable and surrounded. Even though she was used to this- popular, pretty people conversing over her and treating her like an afterthought- she felt weirdly involved and sick about this whole thing. She removed her arm from Jared's reach, and slid out of her chair.

"But, Kim! I- I drove you here," Jared said, a little desperately. "Listen, Autumn, I swear, I'll call you, but I have-"

"You drove her here?" Autumn looked like she'd been slapped. Kim was standing now, with her purse over her shoulder and nervously adjusting her glasses, when Autumn's focus suddenly zeroed in on Kim. Both she and Monica gave her a once-over, a twice-over, and then a third-over. Kim wanted to shrivel up and just die as Monica's lip curled into a sneer, and Autumn disbelievingly asked Jared, "You're just here to study, right?"

"None of your business," he growled.

"Y-you're not, like, on a date? Are you seriously-" Autumn was stunned. She faced Kim again, when Jared didn't answer. She asked Kim, in a screeching voice that bordered on panic, "Do you think this is a date?"

Kim knew her whole face was redder than a tomato; her mouth felt dry with humiliation. When she felt all three sets of eyes on her, she'd never wanted to be somewhere else more than this moment; she'd happily teleport anywhere, anywhere at all on Planet Earth, than be standing here under the scrutiny of two gorgeous, upset girls and the long-time object of her adoration. Her first choice would be inside of an active volcano, but no genie showed up to grant the wish.

"Fuck off, Autumn," Jared said dangerously. His hand was clenched on the table, tremoring. "Don't try to involve her."

Autumn squeaked with a sob.

"We're just here to talk about school," Kim said, softly, feeling totally cowed and wanting to offer some small comfort. Was this a lie? Was this the truth that Kim had danced away from, in some sort of delusion that Jared was offering her a modicum of attention? She swallowed. "Since he's been gone so long. And I really don't want to get in the middle of this, so I'm going to leave."

Autumn relaxed slightly; Jared's face looked pinched with something Kim didn't know how to describe. And his eyes looked sad.

She couldn't bear to look at him any longer.

When she was free of the coffee shop, she dialed Sarah's cell.

"Hey Kim! Are you alive? Why the radio silence tonight?"

"Hey, Sarah?" Kim said, shakily, trying to control her emotions. "Can you come pick me up in Port Angeles?"

"What?"

"I really need a ride. I'll pay you gas plus for the trouble."
"What are you doing out there?" She heard rustling on the other end, as if Sarah was collecting her keys. What a friend. Kim wanted to cry, inexplicably, from relief.

"I'm at Cafe Angel and I'll explain when you get here. It's a weird, long story...but please hurry. I'm trying to avoid someone."

"On it." Sarah paused, and Kim heard the sound of her garage door opening. "But first- are you safe?"

"I'm safe, yeah. Just...anxious to get the hell out of the situation I was in."

"It'll take me an hour to get there, girl. If I speed, I can be there by like, 9:15. Is there somewhere you can chill?"

Kim glanced up. The bookstore was still lit up. "Yeah. That bookstore across the street, you know where I'm talking about?"

"Roger that. Want me to stay on the line?"

"Nah, I'll save my battery. Call me when you're close. I owe you big time, Sarah. Thank you."

"See you soon, Kim."

She pocketed her cellphone, pulling her cardigan tighter and was about to cross the street when she heard Cafe Angel's door open, and then a, "Hey."

Over her shoulder, she spotted Monica addressing her. Fuuuuuck.

"Hey." Kim did not want to invite conversation.

Monica wasn't deterred. "Wait up, would you?"

Kim pointed across the street, hedging, "Oh, uh, I'm meeting a friend at the bookstore so-"

"I won't take long." Monica came to stand just in front of her. The streetlamps reflected off of her high cheekbones, making her look regal.

"Okay?" Kim ventured quietly.

"I wanted to say I'm sorry if we made you feel bad, back there," she said, in a surprisingly gentle voice. "That wasn't our intention."

You made me feel like a Class F speciman, Kim wanted to point out. Instead, she stayed quiet.

"It's just- like, Jared can be such an ass. I know you don't care, and you're just being a good person helping him study, but like- fuck, I don't know why she even bothered dating him. Gum?" Monica was talking quickly, digging through her own purse.

"No, I'm good."

"It's wintergreen."

Kim shrugged, but when Monica held the packet even closer, she tentatively took one. Monica took two and shoved them in her mouth. She chewed fiercely. "He's fucked like four other girls at our school, and dated two girls who graduated last year, and it's like- it never ends up well, you know?"

Kim shrugged again.

"And like, almost every time, I swear it's because of that Harjo girl, or Mallory Peters. It's like he gets bored so quickly and just reverts back to the girls at his own school. Why even bother coming out to Forks if you just are gonna fuck everything up the same way every time?! When him and Autumn hit five months, I was like, 'Oh, shit, it's a record, maybe he's grown up and finally learned to love,' like Beauty and the Beast or something, but then, BOOM. Stops talking to her out of the blue. Comes back looking so fine, but like, too fuckin' fine, right? Like, no guys our age look that good unless they're like seeing a personal trainer or do roids or something. You remember what he looked like before, right?"

"Yeah," Kim said. She nervously pulled her hair out of her ponytail, wishing Monica would just leave. But she made all good, valid points.

"So then, he texts her, and it's back to it, and then-" she snapped beautifully manicured fingers, "wham-bam, it's over. Barely says anything to her other than, 'It's over. Sorry.' Classic nail-and-bail, in the course of a week! I just knew it was going to happen, and I...God!" Monica stamped a foot. Like, actually stamped it, like a frustrated kid or cartoon. But when she looked at Kim, her eyes were pensive.

"It's just, Autumn's my best friend, you know? And she falls for that kind of thing...because she's sweet, and beautiful, and doesn't know better. Whereas, like, you and I...sorry to be presumptuous, but I think you're too smart to fall for that kind of thing, right? I know I am. High school guys are all the same breed. Maybe one-in-a-thousand are made of noble stuff, but that rare case is definitely not Jared Cameron. Am I right?"

Kim wondered if, in any other scenario, she might've been friends with Monica. She agreed, quietly, "You're probably right."

"Probably?" Monica's gaze was hawk-sharp.

"I- I just don't know him well enough," Kim murmured, honestly. "He's ignored me for the entire time we've been at school, since we were kids. I only know him from the occasional project and what I hear from others."

Almost compulsively, like a smoker would treat a cigarette, Monica grabbed another stick of gum. She crammed it in her mouth, staring off vacantly. Even from here, Kim could smell the wintergreen. "Count yourself lucky. Stay away. After Autumn finishes getting her heart broken the rest of the way in there...I don't ever want to see a hot La Push boy ever again."

Kim felt sick all over again. "I hope she doesn't...give it more power over her than it deserves." Kim tried to remember advice she'd overheard her mom giving to Becky, back during her breakups. "She's lucky to have a friend like you."

"Thanks," Monica said. "That's really nice. Again, I'm sorry if...if we made you feel shitty. You didn't deserve that. It was just disbelief that Jared would go out with someone who seemed to have a brain and some class. Harjo and Mallory are certainly not that, and just have 'that look,' you know? That's just his usual caliber. He doesn't know how to look any deeper than the surface. So...we were bitches, but we didn't mean it that way."

Kim understood, and the blow was slightly lessened, but she was still upset nonetheless. What was she even doing, being out with him? Even if it was friendly, and nothing more, she knew Jared's reputation...after all these years, why was she manufacturing all these fantasies of his reformation now, and allowing herself to be ensnared?

"Well, you should meet your friend," Monica said tiredly. "I'm going to sit out here and wait for mine.'

Kim absently bid her goodbye, and made her way to the bookstore across the street in a daze.

When Sarah showed up an hour later, Kim recounted the entire odyssey- and Sarah, when she finished, said, in her snow-soft voice, "I'm sorry, Kim. I know you liked him."

Kim swallowed, and felt tears prick her eyes as she stared out the window. "I didn't...not anymore."

Sarah just gave Kim a sad glance.

After a moment, she simply said, "Sarah, I'm just lucky to have a friend like you."

And truly, Kim thought sadly, Autumn was lucky to have a friend like Monica.

When she got home, her mom was right in the kitchen, wanting to hear about who she went out with.

"Oh, it was just a classmate."

"Honey, I know all your classmates. Which one?" Mrs Connweller prodded.

"Jared," Kim said, through her teeth.

"What!" Mrs Connweller exclaimed.

"I just was...I don't know. We're partners for English sometimes by default and he's been gone...so, like, I don't know. I think it was a thank-you or maybe to get me in debt so I'll help him get through the stuff he's missed. I don't know but it was weird because his girlfriend showed up and was pissed."

Mrs Connweller clearly wasn't expecting any of this. She wiped her hands on the dish towel, then made a motion with her hand that indicated slow down. "Why was she pissed?"

"She thought it was a date- or maybe she didn't. Mostly she was sad, actually. They broke up, and she brought a friend, and was crying…" Kim groaned, covering her face with her hands. "Ugh, Mom. I feel so bad."

"Why do you feel bad?" Mrs Connweller looked like she was trying to grab a rope attached to a speeding train.

"I don't know- I swear it almost felt like he was trying to...ah, I don't know, charm me? Not hit on me, because he wasn't that smooth like he normally is, but...I don't know! He broke up with her and then got my number from someone, and then came over here and wanted to take me to dinner...and it was after I was a total jerk to him in English earlier."

Now her mother looked positively stupified. "You've never been a jerk to anyone, honey."

Kim's brows shot high. "No, but I was today. I criticized him for getting some girl's number when everybody knows he has a girlfriend. Then he was like feeling guilty…" Kim suddenly felt overwhelmed with tiredness.

"Go on?"
"I actually," Kim whispered, quietly, "just want to go to bed, Mom, if that's okay."

Mrs Connweller blinked, then said, "Yeah, of course."

Kim retreated to her watercolor-floral room, and fell asleep only after pretending that tomorrow, everything would be clearer.


A/N: Are you enjoying this so far? I like angsty Jared/Kim stories. Not fun if it's as simple as Jacob made it out to be in ECLIPSE...nah, there's got to be a little turbulence before the HEA, right? ;) Thanks for reading. Please drop me a line or two with your thoughts!