Chapter 34

Rufioh woke up on Prospit again with a feeling of dread; this time he was DEAD. No doubt about it; if Horuss hadn't kiss-revived him, than he would have been dead for good. He tried to see if he could think back in those few minutes, between when Damara had killed him and when Horuss had revived him.

He couldn't remember much about what had happened in those few minutes, but he hadn't liked it. He felt like he was nowhere, in some place without a name, forgotten and alone. But then he was somehow taken out from there, and now he was back here.

But now, he felt relieved. All of that was gone now, and he had the feeling that he wouldn't see that place again for a while. He was free, not technically alive on his planet but safe on Prospit. Now was the time to see what was going on—and to see what he would do next.

Rufioh flew out of Prospit, and the carapacians nearby greeted him with friendly waves. They apparently had no idea what had happened to him a while ago. Maybe it was best just to put it all behind him, Rufioh thought. He was flying along to visit the White Queen for advice when 2 blurs streaked below him: one red and blue, and another yellow. He could hear their voices and was able to tell that they were Latula and Mituna.

"WHOOOOOO! H3y, M1tun4, c4n y4 k33p up, m4n?!" Latula called after her matesprit excitedly.

"HGAOEWGVASEVNSUDNCLSCNISD!" Mituna replied as he wobbled on the skateboard Latula had bought for him (Prospit had quite the underground skater community) and finally took a tumble down some stairs that lead up to the higher-elevated suburbs of Prospit. They both could fly, of course, but in Mituna's panic and confusion he had forgotten that. He hit his head once on the ground on his way down the stairs, and somehow this dislodged his head from his helmet.

Rufioh swooped and caught Mituna just before his already-damaged brain could head the pavement, carrying him in his arms and handing him back to Latula, who was clutching both her and his skateboards in one arm with a guilty look on her face.

"Oh, Tun4! 4r3 you ok?! 1 w4rn3d you 4bout thos3 st41rs?! D1d you forg3t 4bout th3m or not s33 th3m?"

"N0…1T'5 MY F4U1T. 1'M 50RRY," Mituna said apologetically. "1 5H0ULD'V3 5T0P3D 4T TH3 5T41RS."

"1t's ok4y, M1tun4. W3'll just t4k3 you b4ck hom3 4nd pl4y w1th som3th1ng s4f3r. S4y th4nk you to Ruf1oh for s4v1ng you!"

"TH4NK Y0U!" Mituna said sweetly as he looked up at Rufioh. Rufioh found this to be both endearing but also weird. The way Mituna had said that was just so childish.

"Aw, d*mn…thanks, man! You Tula, what's gotten 1nto h1m? why 1s he all…l1ke th1s?" Latula smiled at him sweetly before she explained, but underneath those shades Rufioh could sense she was hiding some wicked sadness.

"Kurloz 4nd h3 4nd 1 w3r3 4ll f1ght1ng h1s D3n1z3n. H3 d1d th1s to h1m 4ft3r w3 b34t'1m," Latula explained.

"Oh, that sucks! 1 mean, Horuss' den1zen was so freak1n' easy! But that Prora Methos b*st*rd sounds l1ke a p1ece of work."

"W3 H4D T0 K1LL H1M, T0UGH!" Mituna tried to explain. "H3 H3 H3 W0ULD'V3 K1LL3D US 4LL! 4444444444444HHHHHH!" Mituna began to thrash about until Rufioh handed him to Latula. After she stroked his hair a few times, he calmed down.

"H3's 4lso b33n h4v1ng th3s3 w31rd vo1c3s 1n h1s h34d th4t 4r3 thr34t3n1ng h1m or som3th1ng. 1 h4d to l1st3n to th3m onc3. Th3y w3r3 cr33py. But 3nough 4bout th4t; could you follow m3 to M1tun4's room so w3 c4n drop h1m off?"

"Sure th1ng, doll!" And so the trolls dropped Mituna off. Rufioh was about to leave when Latula asked:

"H3y, look, 1 know th1s would prob4bly both3r you m4jorly, but could you w41t h3r3 for just 4 l1ttl3 b1t mor3 wh1l3 1 go 4nd g3t M1tun4's h3lm3t? H3 n33ds 1t on h1m b3c4us3 som3t1m3s h3 st4rts b4ng1ng h1s h34d on w4lls. 1 th1nk h3 do3s 1t to try 4nd dr1v3 out th3 sp1r1ts 1n h1s h34d, or som3th1ng."

"Oh…1'm cool w1th ch1ll1'n w1th M1tuna for a wh1le. H*ll, 1'll do you one better; how 'bout 1 take care of M1tuna for a b1t? You just relax and do whatever you need to. You deserve a break from however long you've been car1n'g for th1s guy."

"1 know…but 1'm worr13d 4bout Tun4. 1 don't w4nt Cronus com1ng 4nd both3r1ng h1m. 1f you s33 h1m com3 4round h3r3 could you k33p h1m 4w4y from m1tun4? Just k1ck h1m out, 1 don't w4nt to s33 th3m tog3th3r."

"Hey, 1 get 1t, don't want h1m mov1n' on your man! You can count on me, doll! Not l1ke 1 have anyth1ng else to do."

"No, 1t's not l1k3 th4t Ruf1oh. You s33, Cronus 1s 4 s1ck, d3pr4v3d 1nd1v1du4l. 1 th1nk h3's flush3d for m1tun4 3v3n though h3 CL34RLY do3sn't sh4r3 th3 f33l1ngs, 4nd 1 th1nk h3 h4s 4ll th3s3 bl4ck f33l1ngs for m3 s1nc3 1'm k33p1ng h1m from h1s pr3c1ous pr1z3. M1tun4's br41n-d4m4g3d 4nd c4n't h4ndl3 som3 w31rd p3rson l1k3 Cronus. Trust m3, th1s 1sn't just som3 p3tty r3l4t1onsh1p squ4bbl3."

"Okay, babe, whatever you say. 1t sounds l1ke one to me, but 1'll do what you ask and keep the two separate."

"Th4nks. W41t, wh4t d1d you m34n 4bout not h4v1ng 4nyth1ng 3ls3 to do?"

"Yeah, about that…see, my regular self 1s dead. Th1s body 1s the only one 1 have left. And 1 d1dn't d1e on whatever bed 1 needed to get all powerful and stuff, so 1'm stuck here unt1l further not1ce."

"Oh, sorry 4bout th4t. Th3 g4m3 g4v3 M1tun4 thr33 l1v3s for som3 r34son; th3 on3 on D3rs3 1s d34d, but th1s on3 4nd th3 on3 on h1s pl4n3t 4r3 ok. 1t's k1nd4 funny, but th1s 1s th3 f1rst t1m3 M1tun4's Prosp1t dr34ms3lf h4s wok3n up. B3for3 h3 got th3 br41n d4m4g3 1t w4s 4lw4ys h1s D3rs3 s3lf."

"We1rd. But qu1t worry1n' about h1m. Go out and get yourself someth1ng n1ce or go back to your own world or someth1ng. 1'll take care of M1tuna for you," Rufioh insisted. When Latula had gone and returned with Mituna's helmet she left again after securing his head. Rufioh then focused his attention back on Mituna.

So for the next few minutes they played. Mituna acted just like a wriggler sometimes, wanted to constantly climb on Rufioh's back and ride him. Other times he asked to play a game of Fiduspawn and was surprisingly good at it. It was strange how Mituna would seem to fluctuate from acting 1 sweep old to 5 sweeps, just like that. But Rufioh tried to ignore Mituna's capricious maturity and did whatever he asked, which usually was something simple. Latula had left a laptop behind so that Rufioh could contact her on Trollian if necessary, which he did once Mituna was occuppied with cuddling with a stuffed bee.

Aztlan's Underling (AU) began trolling Gamer Creationist (GC)

AU: Hey doll, where you at?

GC: H3y. Sorry 1 h4v3n't s41d much. St1ll try1ng to f1nd Kurloz's g4t3 from M1tun4's world. H3 w4s w1th us wh3n M1tun4 fought h1s D3n1z3n w1th m3, but 1 h4v3n't s33n h1m s1nc3 th3 b4ttl3.

AU: So wouldn't he be dead, then?

GC: 1KR! But no, som3th1ng t3lls m3 h3's st1ll 4l1v3. M1tun4 would b3 1n sh4mbl3s 1f h3 w4s d34d 1n 4ny s3ns3. But th4t h4sn't s33m3d to h4v3 h4pp3n3d. H3 cl41ms th4t Kurloz w4s th3r3 wh3n h3 m4d3 th3 Cho1c3. B4s1c4lly th3 Cho1c3 to g3t br41n d4m4g3, from wh4t 1'v3 g4th3r3d.

AU: Why'd he do that?

GC: 1 don't know. H3 s41d 3v3ryth1ng h4pp3ns for 4 r34son. 1 wouldn't t4lk to h1m much 4bout th4t, though, 1 don't th1nk h3 could 4nsw3r. But you'r3 w3lcom3 to try. Just don't s4y 4nyth1ng 4bout monst3rs, vo1c3s, or sp1r1ts 4nd h3's f1n3.

AU: Gotcha. Probably just won't say anyth1ng.

Aztlan's Underl1ng has ceased troll1ng Gamer Creat1on1st

Rufioh continued to watch Mituna play by himself. He seemed to be almost ignoring him now, quite a contrast from what had happened before. He kept talking to someone named "Biscuits" as he played with his toys, but Rufioh figured that since Mituna didn't seem to be afraid of this entity then it was harmless fun. Biscuits was probably just an exile. Rufioh was about to troll some more people on Trollian to see if he could make contact with anyone else when he heard a voice in his head.

Rufioh, can you hear me? Please, answer quickly! The voice was hushed and distinctly masculine, and it sounded weary.

"Whoa, whoa! 1f you're one of M1tuna's demons, just stay out of my head! 1 have enough troubles as 1t 1s now! Don't go f1ll1n' my head w1th your crap! And wh1le you're at 1t leave M1tuna alone, too! He doesn't deserve any of 1t!"

No, it's me, Mituna. I'm using telepathy. Please, I just want to talk. Your mind is very troubled, and I want to help. But please make it quick. I can only have Biscuits repress the voices for so long!

"How can you do that? 1 thought your bra1n was fr1ed!"

Not all of it. I still have my psionic powers, and I can still think. The spirits in my head, and their evil voices, are forcibly regressing my brain. I can't stop them, but I can push them back with Latula and Biscuits. If I try talking normally, it won't come out right. They control the way I talk and prevent me from saying what I want to say when I speak, but they still can't control what I think. So go ahead and speak; I want to be of some use now that I'm, well, useless.

"Well, sure 1 guess, what the heck!" Rufioh began. "You seem to have a good sense of my feels. That's creepy, but you sa1d yourself that you'd never be able to tell anyone what 1 told you verbally, so 1 m1ght as well open up."

"See, 1've been really wonder1ng about a lot of stuff for the past few m1nutes. L1ke why 1'm here, and what 1'm do1ng w1th my l1fe. 1 can't answer e1ther of those quest1ons very well. S1nce you don't really know my h1story, 1'll just start from when 1 met Horuss."

"Damara was a sweet g1rl, d*mn f1ne too. At least to me, on the 1ns1de. But then 1 met Horuss. He was someone completely new, completely d1fferent from the lost weaboos and the troll otakus. He showed me how to f1ght and do all k1nds of th1ngs 1 never thought 1 could. 1 just had to bel1eve 1n myself. 1 started hang1n' out w1th h1m more than Damara, and sooner or later he f1gured we had a bond go1n'. 1 wasn't so sure yet, but 1 told h1m 1 agreed w1th h1m. 1 d1dn't want to hurt h1s feel1ngs. And at some po1nt, when Damara came up, 1 just l1ed and sa1d she was my ex. But the truth was that 1 knew very well that Damara loved me, but 1 just left her hang1n'. 1 don't know how long 1t was before she started suspect1n', but she never really let on that she knew up unt1l we started the game."

"When we went 1nto Sgrub 1 mostly had fun w1th Horuss, at h1s 1ns1stence. 1 couldn't help but th1nk how perfect we were together when we beat our Den1zen—he was much weaker than yours. 1 completely forgot about Damara. That was so stup1d of me. 1 have no 1dea what she was do1ng before she k1lled me, but my best guess 1s she was wa1t1ng—wa1t1ng for a fr1end that had d1tched her for someone she d1dn't even know."

"So 1t was only a matter of t1me before she k1lled me. She probably wa1ted for a long t1me for me to go home from Horuss' planet. And when she chased after me to try and k1ll me, 1 just ran. 1 d1dn't want to f1ght her. 1 loved her. 1 don't know about that now. But f1nally, she caught up w1th me—and then 1 just stopped struggl1ng. 1 had th1s we1rd feel1ng that 1 deserved th1s—1 deserved to pay for abandon1ng her and leav1ng alone l1ke she had been before she met me. But now that 1've woken up on Prosp1t aga1n, 1've been th1nk1ng—was death really an appropr1ate pr1ce?"

"1 just don't know. Maybe 1t was. Death was a great escape from Damara. She wasn't there to k1ll me some more. But for a wh1le, before Horuss found me and k1ssed me to br1ng my dreamself to l1fe, 1 was 1n some horr1ble place. 1t was so empty and dark—and 1 felt l1ke everybody 1 had known was gone. But then when 1 woke up 1 felt as 1f someone had reached out and placed me back here, l1ke 1 had been thrown away acc1dentally and ended up back here. And so here 1 am!"

"So now 1 wanna ask; what does 1t all mean? What does th1s game want from us? What does l1fe want from us? And why would the game be perfectly ok w1th Damara k1ll1ng me? Was my purpose just to love her and be pun1shed when 1 left her? You're the He1r of Doom or someth1ng, so do you know?" A few seconds passed, and Rufioh assumed Mituna was thinking about how to answer that.

Just before battling Prora Methos, I was able to learn many things from the HorrorTerrors. I learned what will happen to all of us, and why it will all happen. But then Prora Methos damaged me, and so now I'll never be able to tell you everything, even though I know the answers.

Time is running out, and there isn't much I can say on the matter. But I can say this; timelines are mapped out from beginning to end. No matter what we do or what happens, we're on some sort of timeline where something else will happen as a result of previous events. We change timelines by doing all sorts of things. But right now, we're on the alpha timeline. The one that is the "correct" timeline, through no conscious effort of ourselves. Right now, though it may not look like it, we're heading on the right track.

So let me give you this piece of advice Mituna; everything happens for a reason. Even events that only seemed to serve ourselves or have no meaning at all have some purpose, whether big or small on the grand scheme of things. Right now, the best thing we can do is hope we're on the right track. And so far, I think we're on it and we can't get off. It won't be a pleasant road, I know that much. But we have to do our best to travel it and shoulder the burdens it gives us, even if we don't want it to. It all works out in the end. The burden it gave me was vast knowledge and a broken mind that will ensure that most of it is never shared. It gave you the burden of death and the fact that you're partly responsible for the things Damara will do to ruin our session. But one day, both of our burdens—and everyone's burdens—will be gone, and we'll be free from this game and what it gave us forever. When that happens, I think life will go on for us, but it will be a new and better life. But all of that is far in the future, a future that we all get to see someday.

As for you and your relationships, Rufioh, I'm so sorry that it didn't work out the way you would have wanted. But it was impossible to love both Damara and Horuss. Although it was not right morally to leave Damara alone, and although it was not right for you to try and make Horuss your new matesprit without properly thinking about it and letting her know, paradox space is owes you a great deal of thanks for your indecision. I know that you look about your life right now and all you see are mistakes and tragedy, but believe me; one day you will understand how this all works. I hope on that day to know a little less in return; knowing everything comes with a great price.

"Whoa, dude…that was deep sh*t. Thanks for try1n' to help me real1ze stuff. 1 guess 1'll never know everyth1ng about the way my l1fe's go1n', but 1f you're any 1nd1cat1on somet1mes 1t's not meant for us to really understand, just to acknowledge. You feel1n' me, man? Are we on the same page here?"

Yes. I wish I could explain it all to you, Rufioh, and to everyone else. Especially Latula. She still doesn't quite get it, even though she's heard the voices. I love her so much, and I want to tell her that even though I was doomed in one way to Prora Methos I wasn't really doomed at all. If you have any love left for Damara, Rufioh, let her know, even if there's not much left. I think it will help us stay in the timeline.

"Sure th1ng. Anyth1ng else?"

Tell Kurloz that he serves a false god!

Right after Mituna said that his body began to convulse, and his head and helmet began to crackle with blue and red electricity. Rufioh figured Mituna was having some sort of episode, but he had no idea how to stop it from hurting him. But then a dopey voice called out:

It's okay, Rufioh, Biscuits has got it all under control! Mituna! Mituna, can you hear me? Good. Just relax think about happy things. Focus your mind on one happy thing.

But it seemed like Mituna wasn't getting any better with Biscuits' coaxing. Rufioh took off Mituna's helmet and held his head tightly before Mituna could bash his head into any walls.

"Ch1ll out, man! 1'll send Kurloz the message! Just stop whatever we1rd th1ngs are happen1ng to you…1f you can! All you crazy sp1r1ts just…GET OUT OF H1M!" As soon as Rufioh said this, he could begin to make out strange waves being emitted from Mituna's head. After a few seconds, they vanished and Mituna dropped to the floor. Rufioh put his helmet back on him, and Mituna stood to his feet.

"6U355 TH4'T5 WHY TH3 64M3 C4115 Y0U TH3 R063 0F 8R34TH."

"Heh, yeah. So, you wanna go and…get some frozen yogurt? 1 know they got a shop that has that somewhere on Prosp1t."

"Y44444444444AAAAAAY! OK. 8UT D0N'T T4K3 TH3 SK4T3804RD W4Y."

AN: That last comment by Mituna wasn't supposed to be the beginnings of a pairing. Mituna already has his quadrants filled anyway, except for auspicticize. Rufioh the "breath" Rufioh stole was the spirits that were haunting Mituna. This isn't like Homsetuck where we have John say that he is "not a homosexual", and then he's a homosexual! No, when I say something I don't mean the opposite of what I say, I mean what I say. Sorry to disappoint all you shippers out there, but any more pairings would just confuse you guys. Well, any more red pairings with the trolls, anyways…