Returning to Division was just as disastrous as the mission itself. Alex refused to go to Medical and debrief with the others. She shoved the cryptograph into Birkhoff's hands, grabbed her sling from where she had left it, and stormed out of the bunker. Michael tried to follow, yet she was determined to get the hell out of there. Ignoring everything, including her own pain, she hurried away without a word. In fact, she hadn't said a word since Michael found her seriously injured in Amanda's hideout. Alex shut everyone out, drawing severely into herself. Anyone who noticed her knew something was wrong.
Except, no one tried to approach her. No one tried to talk to Alex besides Michael. Agents avoided her, focusing on their own injuries and debriefings. Birkhoff almost said something, but the new technology in his hands distracted him. And Nikita wouldn't even look at Alex. The two women kept their distance from one another. Other than a shared glance full of hurt and rage, the best friends hadn't interacted since the Sarin gas attack. Something was wrong with both of them. Alex's silence, irritation, and rashness were simply more obvious.
If the women weren't going to address it themselves- try to help one another as they had always done in the past- then there wasn't an easy fix to how wrong things were.
Michael tried, at least. He shirked his own post-mission activities to chase after Alex. When he couldn't reach her, he turned his sights on Nikita. She had been entirely focused on Owen since Amanda had made multiple grabs at him. The bitch's schemes involved him somehow, and it was about more than just the cryptograph. That torture chair she had tried to strap him to in her hideout, one similar to the chair she had once tortured Birkhoff in, proved she wanted to fuck with Owen in some way. Nikita believed it had something to do with his missing memories. Amanda potentially wanted to break his mind apart.
For what reason, though, no one had a clue. It was bewildering enough that Amanda had wiped Owen's memory in the first place. What could she have possibly been planning, and how was Ari supporting her. Although Nikita needed those answers immediately, Michael had to redirect her. The team couldn't lead a successful attack against Amanda if they were falling apart at the seams. If the team self-destructed, then how could they ever reach their happily ever after. They had to fix themselves first; they had to communicate and set right whatever was wrong.
After what felt like hours of searching, Michael finally found Nikita. He thought she would've stayed with Owen, badgering him with a million questions. But when he located her, she was alone in the dark computer lab. She sat hunched at a computer, fingers typing furiously and eyes straining to read as much as she could. Michael sighed, turned on the lights, and quickly pulled Nikita away from the harsh screen. She didn't like the distraction, even if it was her fiancé who did it. Before she could start yelling at him about it, however, he finally begged her to tell him what was going on, "Hey. Talk to me. What's wrong? What happened?"
"Sean's not coming back," Despite the tears burning in Nikita's eyes, her voice dripped in fury. She didn't give Michael the opportunity to question her further. Harshly, she shoved past him and hurried off to possibly another computer. He attempted to follow after her. But he knew she wasn't in the headspace to have the discussion he wanted. Her emotions were beyond frayed with Amanda and Owen. Adding her brother and whatever he had done to the mix would send her over the edge- if she wasn't there already. She shouldn't be approached at the moment.
Sean, on the other hand, could be tracked down and talked to- maybe even yelled at. Actually, Michael was going to yell at Sean. It wouldn't even be exclusively about what he possibly did to Nikita and Alex. The Seal left his team without a word. Division needed help in their raid against Amanda, but he was gone. If he had to do something for the Navy, then that would have been perfectly acceptable. He had a commitment to his Seal unit; it would be understandable why he wasn't there. However, he just left. He just abandoned his team.
Refusing to let that lie, Michael stormed out of Division to confront Sean (after informing the others that he was leaving, of course). He assumed the Seal would be hiding out in his apartment. It was too late for him to be with his other sisters. And if Nikita and Alex were so upset they were avoiding others, then so would he. The lights of his apartment were on when Michael arrived. But there was no answer to his knock. He decided to let himself in with his spare key instead. Although Sean snapped his head up from the couch at the sudden entrance, he wasn't surprised to see Michael. He almost expected him to slam the door and start yelling.
"What did you fucking say to Alex and Nikita?" It was an easy assumption for Michael to make. Before he unexpectedly left from Medical, Sean must've said something to Alex and Nikita. That'd explain their shared hurt and rage. They were both pissed at the same person; though, they refused to address the situation. It probably had something to do with why Sean abandoned the team, which was why Michael demanded to know what he had said. He needed to know what was going on, and why people he cared about were so hurt.
"I just told them I was leaving," Bitterly, Sean chugged the beer he had been nursing. He had thought he could just collapse on the couch and get drunk after the arguments he had had with Alex and Nikita. But his mind wouldn't stop reeling with thoughts of the Sarin gas attack and whatever the team would do in retaliation. Maybe if he joined them, some of his anxiety would be appeased; he could have some control in the situation. But no, he had to stand his ground. Leaving was better for everybody. It was safer and more survivable.
"Really? Cause Alex is angry and irritated. She's acting erratically, and she rushed into the field way too early. And Nikita was crying after your conversation. She wasn't even hiding it. So what did you say?" Growing increasingly irritated, Michael continued to demand. He couldn't believe Sean was leaving Division. It didn't make sense. His sister and his girlfriend (practically) were fighting for their friends- his friends- and all those other agents to have the lives they once had. It was something he was on board with a few months ago. How could he just change his mind. What could've possibly made him just give up on his mission.
"I wanted them to leave with me. Division killed my mother. I can't let it take any more lives. Enough is enough. Staying doesn't fix anything," Shooting to his feet, Sean shouted back. He didn't know why he had to explain himself. Michael should've understood his desire to save the family he had remaining. Division wasn't important anymore. Revenge was achieved, and the great big bads were defeated. That was when they were supposed to have their happy endings. No more pain, no more loss, just the family happy, together, and alive.
"Madeline was Nikita's mother too. Alex lost her father to Division. And I lost my wife and daughter. People die because of abuses of power like that hellhole. That's why we have to stay and shut it down. Without people like us, more innocents and those we love will die. We have the power to stop it. We can't just leave," Michael didn't know why he had to yell that at Sean. He was a Navy Seal; shouldn't he have understood. He knew what it was like to lose someone special in a horrific war. He knew the pain and guilt that latched onto your every being.
He also knew that he wasn't the only one experiencing that sharp, crushing pain. They had all lost someone they cared about to the extreme violence of Division. It was horrible and awful and almost felt un-survivable. But the team could rely on one another for strength. They could talk, be comforted, know they weren't alone. Then, they could use that strength to ensure no one else wound up like them. It was always what the team had done before. Sean wasn't in a different circumstance. There was no need to run. He could be helped.
However, Sean didn't appear to be in the place to accept help. Despite only being half-siblings, and being separated for ten years, he and Nikita couldn't argue that they didn't have the same mannerisms. As Sean ruffled his hair, clutched the short strands, and looked up at the ceiling as he released a strained breath, Michael knew exactly what he was thinking. The Seal was anxious. Actually, it was beyond that. He didn't appear to be able to control his nerves. Mussing his hair didn't settle him; he continued to pace and cast his eyes around wildly. Anxiety was choking him, and he couldn't stop it. There was no chance for him to fight, so he ran.
Sighing, Michael took a gentler step towards Sean. He wouldn't yell at him anymore. Severe anxiety wasn't something to mess with. It also wasn't something the team could fix on their own. Sean needed professional help to deal with his desperation- his darker thoughts. Before he took care of himself, he shouldn't have made any decisions. And he shouldn't have dragged his loved ones down to his level, "Look. If you're having anxiety troubles, talk to a shrink. You have plenty of access with the Navy. Talk out your guilt and grief and post-traumatic stress, and work on yourself. Don't drag the girls into your shit."
Although Michael offered to stay the night so the two could talk and he could make sure his friend would be alright, Sean told him to go home. He wanted to be alone. He didn't want to be alone with his intrusive thoughts- those were too much for him at the moment. But he didn't believe he was deserving of Michael's comfort. The whole team should focus on getting their priorities straight, not just him. Though, Sean knew something was wrong with him; how could there not be after what he had said to Alex and Nikita. He needed to get himself together alone. Maybe with space, the team could figure out exactly what they needed to do to end their war.
Birkhoff and Ryan were soon the only few left in Division that night. Nikita and Owen were probably around somewhere. Nikita was hellbent on figuring out what Amanda was up to. She refused to let it go until she had answers. The others could understand that; they had the same desires, after all. However, she was far more determined, stubborn, and freakishly obsessed than normal. Combine that with Alex's irritability and erratic behavior, and something not normal was occurring in Division.
Ryan wasn't able to wrap his head around it. He had thought dealing with Amanda and her army of Gogol and rogue agents was horrific. Yet, that situation seemed worse. It was possible that someone else knew what was going on with Nikita and Alex. They might also know where Sean had disappeared to. Michael would've been the best person to ask. However, he had left Division a while ago. Ryan could only turn to Birkhoff, who was just as lost as he was. Asking wouldn't hurt, but it also wouldn't get them anywhere, "You know what's going on…"
"Nope," Birkhoff shut the train of thought down before it could even begin. He didn't want to involve himself with the mess. The murderous look in Nikita's eyes and the unsettling gaze in Alex's seemed too much for him to handle. Besides, he was pretty sure that Michael had everything covered. If anyone could get the women to calm down, it'd be him. He could also find out where Sean randomly went off to. In the meantime, Birkhoff could keep his attention on the cryptographic key and the search he was doing on his computer.
"What are you doing?" Easily agreeing with Birkhoff to just drop it, Ryan stared at his computer screen. The hacker had the cryptograph hooked up to one monitor, his other silently played a recording of Amanda's message. Ryan made them save a copy of the video in case they had to scrub it for clues. He didn't mean for Birkhoff or anyone else to do so immediately. The agents and hackers deserved to rest. They had to after the hellish few days (had it actually been a few days or did it just feel like that) they had just had. Replaying Amanda's threat wouldn't be helpful at that moment. In fact, it might make things worse.
"Something about Amanda's message is bothering me," Birkhoff didn't care that even re-watching Amanda's threat on mute was driving him insane. Okay, he cared a little. But the uncomfortable feeling in his gut that something was wrong was worse than his insanity. There were many things wrong, from Owen's memory loss, to whatever Alex and Nikita were going through. Yet those issues had solutions. Amanda had always been just out of grasp of the team's efforts to destroy her. And that time, she definitely knew it.
"What exactly are you thinking?" The entirety of Amanda's message bothered Ryan. He hated how scared and doubtful it made his agents. And he hated that he bought into the fear as well. The Sarin gas attack was only the beginning of her hellish schemes. More shit was going to be hurled their way. However, if Birkhoff was specifically concerned about something, then Ryan had to listen. He had to shove aside his own thoughts and focus on the hacker. Chances were, he caught onto something he had missed.
"How'd she know the Sarin gas had been released already?" Pausing the video, Birkhoff glanced expectantly at Ryan. He had to have some sort of answer. He was a super analyst, able to see things no one else did. He had to have had some guesses at the timing of Amanda's threat. It was too soon after the Sarin gas attack to have been a coincidence. And the way she talked to the room full of agents seemed like she knew exactly what was going on. That couldn't have been possible. She couldn't have known. There had to be another possibility.
Unfortunately, Ryan didn't believe there was. Birkhoff was onto something. How did Amanda know the attack had occurred. How did she know anything. Since Owen had escaped from Ann, Amanda had been one step ahead. She constantly surprised them and knew just how to add onto the hurt. She couldn't have done that with just luck and timing. More was conspiring against Division. Like maybe Amanda was given knowledge of their operations, "It's probably the same reason she was ready for us at the cemetery and at her hideout in Luxemburg."
"You don't think…"
"We have a mole."
