Barney was at the payout counter in Luken's dress shop. Mrs. Luken was holding up the sun dress, admiring it along with Barney. She informed him, "This is a very exciting dress. It's also the wave of the future."

Barney said, "That's a surprise. Thelma Lou fell in love with it because it reminds her of a dress her mother wore."

"It does look like that, but this is made of a new scientifically engineered fabric that needs very little pressing. She can wash and dry this dress, then practically go straight to the hanger."

Barney laughed, "You got to be kidding. No pressing needed, huh?"

"That's right Barney, the wave of the future. Progress."

"I know she'll love that," Barney said, "because who likes to press clothes? Am I right?"

Mrs. Luken nodded and gave Barney a big, long wink while she wrapped the dress. She said, "I hate pressing. It will be nice when all clothes are made of this stuff. Especially Mr. Luken's clothes, seems like I spend my whole life washing and pressing his clothes."

Barney laughed again, "Husbands. They just don't get it do they?"

Mrs. Luken laughed along, "No, Barney. They do not."

The payout counter was directly in front of the large dress shop window, it held a somewhat nice view of the main street. One could basically stand by this window, and in a day know most of every other Mayberry citizen's business. Just outside the window two middle aged men had been getting into a very heated argument, of which Barney and Mrs. Luken had been oblivious to while they praised the future of woven of fabrics and the hopeful end of clothes pressing, when one of the men grabbed the other by his shirt, pulled back a closed fist and spun a powerful punch. The punched man fell against the shop window and slowly slid down it, his cheek burping and squeaking against the glass as he went down.

Mrs. Luken exclaimed, "Oh my!" at the violent drumming sound when the man smacked the window.

Barney jumped a little and looked out the window over a wrinkled nose and gaping mouth. "What in the world?" Barney instructed Mrs. Luken, "Don't you worry, just stay put and I will take care of this."

Mrs. Luken only nodded in fast little nods, her eyes wide and attentive.

Barney dashed outside to find Bill Radley standing over Harold Blunt. Bill still wielded a clenched fist, waving it in small circles. Harold sat with his back against the dress shop, rubbing his wounded jaw. Barney took Bill Radley by the shoulder and pulled him two steps back away from Harold. Barney scolded them, "Bill Radley and Harold Blunt? In a fight? You two have been best friends since kids, like two peas in a pod. You two should be ashamed of yourselves."

Bill said, "Well, things change I guess. I can't stay friends with the likes of him."

Harold spat out blood on the pavement and said, "Yeah. You just go your way Bill, and I will go mine."

Barney said, "I have a good mind to run you both in and lock you up until you get your heads screwed back on right."

Bill said, "You ain't got to worry about this happening again Barney. I'm never speaking to this asshole again for as long as I live."

Harold, still rubbing his jaw, agreed, "That's fine by me you thick skulled ape."

Bill was already walking back to his home and Barney lent a hand to help Harold back to his feet, he said to Harold, "If anyone ever told me I would see a day where the two of you broke out in a fight, I would have told them they're crazy."

Harold said, "He just ain't who he used to be Barney. I don't guess either of us are."

Barney was about to tell Harold to take care when the sound of glass breaking interrupted him. After the noise of the glass shattering, a shrill and all too recognizable cackle filled the air. It was the all too unique laugh of Earnest T. Bass. Barney rolled his eyes and turned to see that Earnest had busted the passenger glass out of a pickup truck. Barney yelled, "Earnest T., you stop right there!"

Earnest T. held his arms out in front of him, "You caught me fair and square deputeeeeeee."

Barney stomped up to Earnest T. and said, "You beat all, you know that. I'm taking you in."

Earnest still had his arms out in front of him, poised perfectly to have cuffs slapped on them. Barney obliged. Barney clicked the cuffs tightly and said, "At least you haven't changed any."

Earnest T. scratched his chin, his hand and wrist of the right arm now mysteriously no longer cuffed. "Why would I need to change?"

Barney grabbed the right wrist and cuffed it again, squeezing even tighter on the cuffs. Earnest now pointed down the sidewalk, his left wrist now free of the cuffs. Earnest said, "Look at those folks watchin' us deputy."

Barney's voice was in high pitch as he grabbed the left arm this time, "Now, you cut that out. When an officer of the law places cuffs on you, it's your duty to stay cuffed."

There was a small crowd of people now around the Barney and Earnest T. debacle. Barney grabbed Earnest by the elbow and began to lead him away. Earnest said to the crowd, "What're all you lookin' at?" Earnest grinned broadly, "Deputeeeee, I think they're lookin' at you. You must be the hero right now."

"Just be quiet Earnest T." Barney said.

The cuffs clanked when they fell to the sidewalk, both hands free. Barney yelled, "I told you to cut that out." Barney bent over and retrieved the hand cuffs, but when he stood back up, Earnest was fleeing. Earnest shouted, "They all watchin' you deputeeee. But you can't catch me, I'm Earnest T."

Earnest jumped into the street, directly in front of a Pauley's furniture truck moving through town. The crowd of people flinched and scattered some, each anticipating a very potential mauling of Earnest T. Bass beneath the heavy wheels of the truck. Instead, what they witnessed was the truck driver standing on the brakes and the furniture truck drifting sideways on the road, the tires burping and screeching against the asphalt, and coming to crashing halt, broadsided against the truck that Earnest T. had smashed a window out of only minutes ago. The box cargo truck now had a split in the side of its bed where the furniture is stored during transport. A giant white cloud drifted out the buckled gap. Barney yelled, "Fire! The truck's on fire!"

Barney ran to the driver's side of the truck and opened the door. He then pulled the dazed driver out of the truck. The driver saw the white cloud and said, "Ah, shit. Look at that. The boss ain't going to like that."

Barney told the driver, "Don't you worry. I'll have a firetruck here in a jiffy."

The driver exclaimed, "Hell no! Don't you do that. If the content gets wet I will be in trouble for sure."

Barney said, "But, the fire…"

The driver said, "That's not fire you idiot. Aren't you a cop? You know what's in there."

Barney did notice that the smoke had stopped. After a closer inspection, Barney saw that around the split in the truck bed was a caking of white powder. Barney rubbed some of the powder on his finger and touched it to his tongue. "Cocaine," Barney whispered. Barney ran to the driver and fumbled for his pistol, "Don't you move buster. That truck bed is full of cocaine."

The driver growled, "Which idiot are you? I thought we had a deal here. Who's in charger around here?"

Unexpectedly, a hand was placed on Barney's shoulder, and Barney turned to see it was Andy. Andy said, "Barney, you did a good job. I will take it from here."

The driver said, "You going to lock me up sheriff? We ain't paying you enough now or something?"

Andy whispered into the driver's ear, "Just go along with me. The deputy doesn't know everything."

Andy turned to Barney, "I'm placing a call in to the state police Barney. For now, don't let any of the citizens know what this is. They would all panic if they knew drugs were on this truck." Andy pat Barney on the back, "You did a fine job here Barney. Why don't you go finish up that shopping. I will take care of this."

Barney said, "You don't need my report?"

Andy said, "Nah. I will write one up. I saw it all."

Barney slowly stepped away from the incident, one eyebrow raised, and completely baffled by everything that had just happened.