"Talking"
'Thinking'
'Flashbacks'
[Typing]
《Robotic impression》
『Skills, dramatic impression』
Dramatic impressions
D-siege.
The name doesn't really have any meaning, actually.
Rather, it was just a simple world play.
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2:00 PM
Bzzzt* Bzzzt* Bzzzt*
In a room in a simple Japanese-style dorm, Naruto lay down on his futon soundly.
"Urgh..."
As groaned when he woke up to the buzzing ringtone of a phone.
"W-what...?"
He looks around for a bit, visibly confused about where he had been whilst checking the source of the buzzing sound.
He discovered a bag full of clothes along with his previous tattered ones inside next to the floor.
Inside that bag, he pulled out a smartphone.
"What is this thing-ttebayo...?"
He remembered what happened yesterday while asking that to no one: "Naruto Uzumaki-kun, you will become one of us!" "Eh!?"
Those words were exclaimed by Makoto right after Naruto just woke up.
They didn't explain anything else to him afterward and told him he could sleep inside the dorm.
"Ah right, I remember now... this is a 'smartphone' as Makoto-san calls it..."
While murmuring to himself, he accidentally touched the still ringing screen with his thumbs.
[Gyutto mōninggu~ (Good morning)]
That playful and nonchalant voice was exclaimed by none other than Makoto the suicidal man himself.
"That voice, Makoto-san!?" Naruto muttered.
[Yup! it's me! Sleep well? How do you like your new lodgings? Honestly, I don't think you'd pick up my call, noting the fact long-range communication devices are not common in your world except in its military. But I'm glad you're catching on!]
The man stated happily.
"O-oh! I just pressed it randomly-dattebayo!"
[Ah? Is that so? Umu umu... then maybe we'd have Sei-kun teach you about it later?]
"Well, that's fine but..."
Before Naruto could say something else, Makoto interrupted.
[By the way, we have problems.]
"Eh?"
[Something bad has happened, Naruto-kun. And you're the only one who can solve it!]
"E-eh!?"
[Come on, Naruto-kun! this is really bad you know!?]
"I—I understand! I'll follow your instructions dattebayo!"
2 minutes later...
Naruto stood outside of a room while dumbfounded.
He wore a new set of casual style clothes with a white shirt and black pants, and somehow, a black blazer as if he is going to some prestigious school.
He ditches the black tie as he doesn't know how to wear it, but wore the black sneakers left out in his apartment.
"Yo! Naruto-kun. How exceedingly kind of you to come! Mind giving me a hand?" Makoto stated these words while... hanging upside down?
They're currently in a room next to Naruto's room.
"Am I... hallucinating?" (Naruto)
"You are not" (Makoto)
With a comical face, Naruto asked: "...what are you doing-ttebayo?"
The suicidal man was strangled with ropes around his stomach, the rope was tied up on the ceiling while the rest of the floor was messed up with a lot of stuff; among them, was a fell-over chair.
The suicidal man, on the other hand, is still in his pajama and one of his tied up hands holds the smartphone he was holding.
"Oh naw, it's just my usual routine. I tried a new method that'll require me to drop myself fast before the rope strangled my neck, but it failed you see?
Sometimes, an ordeal like this one happens and I'd end up suffering from the pain.
My stomach is really hurting right now...
More than this and I might actually die!"
He explained cheerfully which almost makes Naruto speechless.
"...Uhh... okay. Then keep it up? Don't you say you want to die-dattebayo?"
"I have no desire for it to be so painful, silly~ I cut the other rope too fast and before I knew it, the rope didn't tighten fast enough to reach my neck, and got my stomach instead..." (Makoto)
"I—I see..." (Naruto)
Recap: Naruto, the main character of this story, was transported into another world.
Unbeknownst to him, he was transforming into a giant fox and spreading havoc citywide until Makoto-san here saved him.
According to him, Konoha doesn't exist in this world.
Makoto-san is part of the famous detective agency, D-siege... each member is an "otherworlder" possessing supernatural powers.'
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"Why didn't you ask someone else in the agency for help?" Naruto asked the suicidal man.
"I did, I told them I was at the death's door, but they were all just like 'Congrats!'. They're so mean don't ya think?"
Naruto sweatdropped on that: 'Ah... I could imagine that dattebayo...'
"Ahahahaha..." Naruto let out an awkward laugh.
"Well, now that that's done. I still have something to do, something inevitably dangerous..."
"Eh? What's that, dattebayo?"
...
"Toilet."
"..."
After Makoto finished his business, they started walking,
"By the way, you're one of us now, so I'll take you to our agency."
"W-wait it! I haven't even accepted yet dattebayo! I want to—"
"Go back home, right?"
Makoto interrupted his rants.
"You could 'go home' if you join our agency you know?"
Naruto perks up at this revelation.
"Eh?! For real!? You're not lying right?!"
"Yup, everyone inside the agency has the privilege to go back to their own world. Of course, you only can use it if you join our agency. Also, only the strong ones are allowed to use it. Now... what • will • you • do, I wonder~"
Stating those cheerfully, Makoto plastered a face of mischief.
"I'll— I'll join-ttebayo!"
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A man approached them on the street.
The man wears a black beige vest over a grey long-sleeved dress shirt, plain black pants and shoes.
That man is Seishuu Handa.
"THERE YOU ARE YOU BANDAGE-SQUANDERING MACHINE!"
Handa exclaimed thus, and angrily gave the suicidal man a nickname.
"GAAAAAAHHHH" Somehow, the suicidal man took some imaginary damage from that nickname.
"S-sei-kun... A nice nickname you gave me there... I'm a little hurt."
"I DON'T CARE IF YOU'RE HURT OR NOT. MORE IMPORTANTLY, IT'S AN EMERGENCY! OFF WITH YOU, RIGHT NOW!"
"Jeez what's with you, shouting in the middle of the day... All that shouting would make you excrete harmful toxins that cause Hemorrhoids you know!?" (Makoto)
"T-there are something like that!?" (Seishuu)
"Of out there is! here-here, take some notes!"
On that, Naruto just sweatdropped at the detective who furiously scribbled on his notes while mumbling: "Shouting = Hemorrhoids".
He could guess what come next, Seishuu-san would need to buy a new pen.
Of course... Makoto was messing with him.
"I was messing with you though"
SNAP*
And so, the poor Ballpoint in Seishuu-san's hand snapped into two once more.
"KISAMA! STOP RIDICULING ME YOU BANDAGE FUC—"
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-Please stand by-
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After seeing Seishuu-san trying to beat Makoto up, Naruto voiced his thoughts.
"So... what's the emergency dattebayo?"
Seishuu who's trying to rip apart Makoto's hands to no effect, came to a realization.
"Ah! that's right... I've wasted a minute dealing with this idiot, we have to go back to the agency!"
Naruto shifted his attention to him.
Then Makoto lazily asks: "Why's that?" not minding Seishuu's grip on his collar.
"As I said, we have an emergency... the agency was attacked and... the attacker has taken hostage."
"Attacker?"
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"Haa... we can't have that now, can't we? You guys are always late... seriously, the D-siege's agency is always late AT EVERYTHING! YOU ALWAYS— THEIR DEATH IS ALL YOUR FAULT!" A teenage boy presumably a high schooler sat at the table within the office while shouting those words between his gritting teeth.
The boy is a brunette, wearing a red jacket over his black vest.
The black vest is full of mechanical parts, presumably to be a suicide bomb vest.
His mood seems to be as bad as his anxiety showing while saying: "Didn't I tell you to bring the President to me!?"
He raised his voice when everyone noticed he hold a remote that seems connected to the "bomb vest".
Right next to him on the floor, a poor blonde high school girl was taken as hostage.
There are only clerks and the maids present to witness the act they also looked terrified by the scene in front of them.
Of course, the trio consisting of suicidal and angry adults plus Werefox were hiding not far away from the office to try to solve the problem.
"Makoto-san... what are we going to do? If I'm not wrong those things he wore can explode right?" The whiskered blonde asks the suicidal man while the three are in hiding.
"This is a bad scenario possible... taking the switch from him won't be enough..." Makoto muttered.
"Eh!? what do you mean-ttebayo!?"
To naruto's question, Seishuu-san answers lowly: "It's that bomb, throughout history, there's always been a case where the bomber set up a sensor to detonate the bomb just from shaking or jostling. With just one movement, the timer on the vest would start to countdown. And finally... explodes."
"T-that would be bad, dattebayo!"
"Shh! control your voice!"
Then Makoto caught their attention: "Not just that... I don't think anyone with a bomb disarming ability showed up today, so we'll have to Sei-kun, try to negotiate with him first"
"HA!? Why do I have to take orders from you!?" The calligrapher angrily shout-whispered.
"Well of course! because I'm your senpai~" The suicidal man's remarks silenced him back down.
Seishuu wanted to retort, but he understand it was not the time for arguing.
That's why, he came out from the table he's hiding.
"Hey kid, let's talk for a bit."
Saying that, he holds his hands up to ensure he has nothing in his hands.
And when it caught the teenage bomber's attention, "Y-y-you! I told everyone to back off! STOP RIGHT THERE!"
The boy with the suicide vest exclaims while pointing at Seishuu with the switch at hand.
"I'm just here to talk, okay?"
Seishuu took a step forward as he still keep his hands up to show no malice.
"STOP IT! ONE MORE STEP AND I'LL BLOW ALL OF US SKY HIGH!" The bomber exclaimed.
Thud*
Of course, Seishuu stopped.
It was not because the boy has the bombs, but because of the next line the boy spoke: "I knew who you are... you're Seishuu Handa, a member of D-siege's Detective Agency, don't you dare take another step cause I knew what your freaky ability is!"
Negotiations failed. Cause: culprit has possibly done research on all the agency's members.
"You sit on the table and keep your hands down where I can see it!"
Thus, the bomber ordered.
In the back of their hiding, Makoto mutters: "Hmmm~ the situation looks worse... The culprit has done some research on our members... We need someone else to negotiate with him, for example: an outsider."
His serious face then turned to Naruto.
"That's why... NA • RU • TO -KUUU~N—"
"I'm not doing it." (Naruto)
"Aww, I haven't said anything you know~?"
"I knew what you were going to say-ttebayo..."
"Listen, Naruto-kun..." Makoto's face became serious once more.
"You're the only one here who's not an official agent of our agency, the guy shouldn't know about you. Rather, didn't you say you want to join us? This is a perfect test for you!" The suicidal man stated.
"B-but even if I go then, I don't think I could even—"
"Don't worry, we'll just have you distract him for a short while... leave the rest to us. You just need to pretend to be some worthless human being?!" (Makoto)
"Eh!?" (Naruto)
"There, some props for ya." Suddenly, Makoto gave him some newspapers for Naruto.
"Ehhh..."
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Well, they ended up doing it.
"P-please stop, dattebayo!" Trying to play the role of a "worthless human being" was Naruto who was holding stacks of newspapers.
"HAH!?"
"W-w-what do you think you'll manage to do by doing this?"
With some broken speeches and a pathetic look on his face, Naruto acted accordingly.
"Those people you loved won't be happy with you doing this ya know?"
Then, with a loud voice, the bomber retort: "Why the hell a brat is here!?".
Thud*
It made Naruto fall off his but in fear.
"S-sorry!"
"You... You're not from the agency, aren't you? what the hell is a brat like you doing in this place?"
Naruto shows his newspaper for him to see and says: "As—As you can see, I am just a passing by newspaper boy, dattebayo!"
"And why the hell a newspaper boy like you meddling with the agency's business hah!?"
"I—I...!"
He fixed his stature and he looks down for a bit before saying: "I don't think you want to kill yourself easily like that dattebayo..."
"Kufu... kufu.. kufuhahahaha! are you trying to play hero, kid!? You're just a kid so what do you know? you don't want to die cuz you'll leave your toys behind or something like that!? Get out of this building if you don't want to die."
It took some time, but after all of the stuttering... Naruto shows determination to the bomber.
"I know that feeling dattebayo. No, I don't get why you're taking it on them but I do know that feeling of wanting to kill yourself."
The bomber snorted: "oh really? a kid like you?"
"Yeah... Back in the village, no single kid wants to play with me, the adults avoid me, for my entire life I've currently been nothing but an outcast!"
"You probably thought of about something like this: 'Everyone I loved is dead so, no one would probably complain if I die'. Isn't that so!?"
"If so, then you're not using your brain enough, dattebayo!"
Naruto's emotions can now be seen by everyone.
While talking, Naruto slowly stepped forward.
"Every single day I was always without friends. Every single night I heard the adults talking behind my back! Whether they're teachers from the academy or just some villagers I don't even know! If you get to feel down because you lost your loved ones, then why don't we switch places you sorry waste of an adult!?"
Naruto stopped in his tracks when he reaches the dumbfounded bomber's face.
"Because even if it's just for a while, I'd like to know how it feels to have "loved ones" as you did!"
That voice radiates anger throughout the office.
And just as the culprit is distracted... "Do it now, Sei-kun!" Makoto was the one who gave the signal.
Swiftly, while still crouching on the desk, Seishuu wrote characters in his green book and shredded the paper.
"I know! Brat! dodge it!"
The weak sheet of paper turned straight and sturdy before Seishuu throw the paper like a shuriken toward the culprit.
"Crap-!" (Culprit)
"Take the switch, Seishuu-kun!"
"As I said, I KNOW!"
Seishuu then took a wire gun from the holster on his waist.
BANG*
THUD*
At the same time Seishuu's wire gun took the remote away, the solidified paper stick itself on the culprit's forehead.
And from that, the culprit stopped moving.
The solidified paper as a huge kanji read as "Paralyze" and some other characters around it.
The distraction has been successful.
And finally, Naruto could let out a sigh of relief.
They could even hear the clerks and part-timers clapping from their hiding place.
"Iyaaah~ good job, Seishuu-kun."
"Seriously, you— 'Do it now' or 'Take the switch!'... aren't you just all talk and no help at all!?"
"Haha, it cannot be helped now can it? I am... your 'senpai' after all~"
"Kuh-! This bastard..."
Both Seishuu and Makoto stepped forward to arrest the bomber, of course, bringing a little comedy into their banter.
Well, Naruto can only sigh in relief: "Thankfully no one gets hurt, dattebayo..."
Makoto takes the detonator which was on the floor and Seishuu calls a number on his phone for the "bomb department".
Once they did, moved toward the bystanders to calm them down and to announce the problems has been resolved.
But unknown to them, a hand pushed Naruto's back.
"Ah..." 3×
Ah...
Ah...
THUD*
Naruto grabbed the suspect's vest to stop his falling.
And finally,
BEEP*
The timer pinned on the bomb vest started its countdown.
00:00:30
"30 seconds before explosion!?"
"SHIT! Take the vest off!"
"Naruto-kun! Get away from here!"
Naruto doesn't know what to do.
No, rather, he doesn't know what he is doing.
Because right now, his body is moving on its own.
00:00:20
ZZZP*
Firstly, he took the vest forcefully. He then grabs both the bomber and the hostages and throws both individuals toward the only other two detectives in the room.
00:00:10
And finally, he shielded the bomb as he crouched on the ground, pathetically and naively thinking that his body would be enough to stop the explosion.
00:00:08
"IDIOT! NARUTO-KUN!"
00:00:03
"BRAT!"
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00:00:00
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For a while... he thought he was already dead.
However...
"I know he's dumb, but never thought he'd be this much of an idiot..." (Seishuu)
"Maa~ maa~ Sei-kun, he is just 10 years old you know? this is already a nice outcome. To me, he has the talent to become a suicide maniac. What do you think, Issei-kun?" (Makoto)
"He actually thought he could suppress the explosion with his own body... this kid has some guts. Sorry there, you okay?" Somehow, the bomber himself gave him an apology.
'Eh?' Naruto looked around.
'What the hell...?'
"Issei-san! are you alright!?" Somehow, the hostage herself run to the suspect with worries written clearly on her face.
'Huh!? what!?' Naruto is still not catching up.
"I'm fine Asia..." The supposedly known as the bomber suspect responded the somehow freed hostage sheepishly.
"Ehhh!?"
Unbeknownst to Naruto, both hostage and suspect were actually unofficial members of this agency.
(Issei Hyoudou, Main Ability: 『Boosted Gear』, Unaffiliated)
(Asia Argento, Main Ability: 『Twilight Healing』, Unaffiliated)
"What the heck... is happening, dattebayo...?"
"Lad, you can blame Makoto for this... or yourself for trying to get your nose into the place where you shouldn't." Suddenly Seishuu-san stated.
It caught Naruto's attention when Makoto says: "Indeed... well there ya have it. Naruto-kun, just call this some sort of... 'entrance exam' alright?"
"Eh!?"
Naruto couldn't believe it.
Yes, he is not dattebayo right now, ya know?
Author's note: Haha yes. My jokes are cringe AF.
The whole bomb thing was just a stage?
Are these guys serious!?
"Try to think about it, Naruto-kun. There's no way they'll put a motion sensor on a suicide bomber's vest you know? If they did, they would've exploded immediately. The one who pushed the button was me obviously" Makoto explained.
"What— What the hell-ttebayo!? so this whole thing was just a test, dattebayo!?"
"That's right" Suddenly an unknown voice comes up.
The voice sounds gentle yet overbearing at the same time.
At the same time, the culprit who voiced that "gentle yet overbearing" voice came out from the back entrance door.
Seishuu-san bowed as he muttered some words: "Good day, Shacou"
Shachou means the president of a company. In a company and he/she has the highest status. But SHOCHOU could be at any branch of a company.
"P-president!?" Naruto didn't expect the culprit of that voice to be a light blue-haired woman in her 20s, her gold pupils gazing into Naruto's soul as Naruto keep switching between admiring the beauty or being scared of the aura leaked unconsciously by the woman.
(Rimuru Tempest, Main Ability:『Manas:Ciel』)
But suddenly...
"Rimuru... it's not a time for admiring your favorite character, you know?"
"W-WHO'S ADMIRING!? I'M NOT ADMIRING!" Unbefitting of her demeanor, she suddenly retorted Makoto's words.
"Kohon*" Suddenly, the president called "Rimuru" coughed a little.
Author's note: "Kohon" is an onomatopoeia for a light cough.
"Since Vel— Makoto there said there's a 'promising' boy, I had him test your mettle... Naruto-kun." The beautiful woman stated thus with a smile.
Ignoring the jaw-dropping whiskered blonde, Makoto explains: "I recommended you to the boss, but remember, you remain wanted by the local ward... in your beast form. There was some debate about whether we should protect you or not. Thus, we staged this up. to try to see your true colors"
It was then when Seishuu Handa voiced his thoughts: "So... ma'am, your decision...?"
He seemed to ask what decision the agency shall take.
After looking at Naruto's direction for a bit longer... She nodded.
"I shall leave it for Makoto to decide."
"Roger that."
"W-wait dattebayo! Makoto-san said I could go back—"
"Naruto-kun." Suddenly, the suicidal man called.
"Do you know that the name 'D-siege' never actually has a meaning?"
"Haah!? what are talking about so suddenly...?" (Naruto)
"In reality, it was just a simple wordplay. You know... D-siege... DE—Sī—Ji... D • C • G" (Makoto)
"D-d-d C... huh!?" (Naruto)
"Hahaha! well, gimme your smartphone, Naruto-kun." (Makoto)
"As I said-ttebayo, what is this so suddenly!?" (Naruto)
"Just do it." (Makoto)
DING*
"Naruto-kun, Welcome... to the Dimensional Chat Group."
"Huh!?"
《"Nine-tailed boy" has joined the server》
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To be continued.
