Chapter Four
"Well," the Doctor announced to everyone around him. "End of the line. We are at the end of the universe. Where good and evil will battle to the end. Gosh, that's a lot of endings."
The Sontarans and Thor and Leela were all eager to be the first out the door to do battle.
"I have waited a long time for this!" Thor said, hefting Mjolnir eagerly.
"Open the doors, Time Lord!" Commander Stor insisted.
The Doctor puffed bravely and opened the doors. The others all charged out, battle cries ringing in the Doctor's ears. "K-9, guard the TARDIS."
"Affirmative, master."
The Doctor followed the others outside the TARDIS. He did not see the final battle of the universe. He did not see armies. He did not see a battle of any kind. Instead, here, at the end of the universe, he saw a gigantic restaurant.
Leela, Thor and the Sontarans had come to a stop some twenty feet beyond the TARDIS. They simply stood there, not knowing what to do.
"Oh, well," said the Doctor as he walked up to the others. "I think we could all do with a bite to eat before we engage in the final battle. Come on." And he walked past them.
Leela, Thor and the Sontarans looked at one another, still baffled. But the Doctor seemed to know what he was doing. And so, with some trepidations, they followed him past the enormous collection of space ships which were parked outside and on towards the restaurant itself
Before reaching the entrance, they walked past a small group of protestors. They held signs which read, "Support the universe!" "Don't let it end here!" and "The end of the Universe is nigh." These protestors were the sort that actually believed they would get attention drawn to their cause by annoying people. They also believed that they would get more attention if they chanted. And worst of all, they were under the mistaken impression that they could get the attention their cause needed if their monotonous chant rhymed.
They did get the attention of the Doctor and the others. But it was not the sort of attention that they wanted. After the Doctor, Leela and Thor had walked quickly past them, the Sontarans pulled out their weapons and shot the protestors.
They all walked past the souvenir shops and finally into the gigantic restaurant itself.
The group was met by the head waiter in the entrance lobby. The lobby was expensive, dark and elegant. The head waiter was tall, elegant, and had a voice like a stone. "Good evening, madam, gentlemen. Do you have a reservation?"
"No," the Doctor said simply.
"No problem, sir. If you would all follow me, I will show you to your table."
The group followed the waiter through a large open doorway and into an enormous open area large enough to rival the largest sporting stadium. Thousands of beings from all over the universe came together to dine together in peace as they watched the destruction of the universe.
The waiter stopped at a large table with six chairs and gestured grandly to it.
The Doctor plopped down, picked up a menu and began to peruse it. The others stood there, unsure of just what to do. Then, one by one, Leela, Thor and the three Sontarans sat down as well.
"What do we do here?" Thor asked.
"Eat," the Doctor said. "Just tell the waiter there what you'd like."
"I like meat. Lots of meat!"
"Very good, sir," the waiter said with an obsequious bow.
And then, moments later, Thor was introduced to the dish of the day. "Good evening, sir," said the Ameglian Major Bull. But he got no further as Thor approached the animal, grabbed one of its front legs, tore it off with a loud, wet crack, and began eating, blood dripping from the sides of his mouth. He dropped back into his seat to enjoy his meal.
Leela did not like this. She chastised the thunder god, "The animal should be slain first. It should not suffer so."
Mouth full, Thor shrugged.
Leela drew her knife and slit the bull's throat mercifully. Blood drained from the animal, the eyelids drooped slowly and shut. Leela then held the knife over the beast, ready to make another incision. She turned back to the table, "Doctor, which part of the beast would you like?"
But before the Time Lord could answer, a huge explosion outside quieted the restaurant's patrons. Everyone looked at everyone else, worried.
A man ran in, made straight for the main stage where Max Quardlepleen had been speaking, grabbed the microphone out of his hand and shouted into it, "Hey, everyone! There's a big fight going on outside!" Half the people in the restaurant suddenly got up and ran outside to see it what was going on.
Thor was back on his feet in a second. And then so were Leela, and so were the Sontarans, who did not ingest food of any kind, and so had nothing to gain from a visit to a restaurant in the first place.
"Hold it!" the Doctor boomed at them with total authority. The all stopped and turned to him. "We're expected to leave a tip!" he pointed out indignantly.
At last, it had come; Ragnarok! The final battle between good and evil!
Thor literally thundered through the walls of the restaurant, Mjolnir in the lead. Once outside, he immediately began pummeling the minions of darkness. There was a moving sea of hideous creatures wielding terrifying-looking weapons advancing. And from the opposite direction was an equally huge army of vicious but rather less hideous soldiers representing goodness in the universe. And, unfortunately, the restaurant sat innocently in between them.
At this point however, Max Quardlepleen had set himself up on the roof of the restaurant along with a complete video and audio feed being transmitted all across the universe. And he was soon joined by a very special co-host. "Hello, good evening, and welcome to Ragnarok; the final battle at the end of the universe. And joining me for this epic conflagration is none other than the great profit Zarquon."
"Good evening, Max," said the old man in the long robe sitting next to him.
"Good evening, Zarquon. We're glad you could make it… finally!" Zarquon simply held out his hands helplessly and shrugged.
"Well, the battle seems to have begun. Whom do you favour as the winner in this final epic display of destruction?"
Zarquon pondered for a moment, and replied, "Max, I generally only favour the forces of good. But I must say, the forces of evil have assembled a very impressive army here. And evil has always had an advantage over good when it comes to a purely physical conflict. They've always been more willing to maim and do the sort of damage that morally superior people are just more reluctant to do."
"That's a very good point, Zarquon. But right now, it looks as though Thor is making a lightning strike against the forces of evil, so to speak. And if it continues like this, he stands a very good chance of winning the battle single-handedly, and this could very well be Thor's day."
Zarquon shook his head sadly, "I'll never get the hang of Thor's day."
The battle continued. Explosions shook the foundations of the universe. Stars exploded. Planets crashed into one another. The Sontaran troopers who had come with the Doctor charged headlong into the enemy. And Leela wielded her knife a bit. It was a terrific battle! Armies fought to the bitter end, fierce warriors fought to their last ounce of strength, and every violent and bloody cliché was used to the last. But alas, it just wasn't enough. In spite of the very best efforts of the universe's most wholesome and decent people, the forces of evil eventually won the battle. It took a bit of time, of course. But standing on the battlefield, the Doctor and Leela found themselves surrounded by the bodies of the dead and dying. All the soldiers of light seemed to have died. The restaurant was now a smoking ruin. Max Quardlepleen and Zarquon the profit were held at the point of a sword by some large green goblins.
But Thor continued on his own. He wielded Mjolnir furiously. Denizens of darkness were crushed and flattened by the dozen with every mighty stroke of the hammer. And still they came. Until finally, the mist parted and made way for one last terrifying beast. One hundred feet tall, covered in black scales, green slime dripping from its every orifice. Its mouth could swallow a house. Its mighty arms and claws could have juggled stars.
Thor charged at the mighty beast, slamming against its belly like an insect hitting a speeding car on the road. Thor tried again and again, screaming with rage, over and over. Until finally, the creature actually noticed the tiny god of thunder. It thwacked Thor with a single finger. Thor went flying towards the Doctor and Leela out of the sky like a meteorite. He slammed into the ground, skidding to a halt. He rose slowly to his feet again a moment later, ready for more. But the Doctor held him back. "No, no. I don't think there's anything else that can be done at this point."
Thor knew this to be true. He drooped his shoulders. And then his legs gave out from under him, and he dropped to his knees. Leela too sank slowly to the ground. "Doctor, what is to be done?" she asked.
The Time Lord looked around at the death and carnage. He sighed and shook his head. "I really don't know, Leela."
The minions of evil and darkness surrounded them. Blood, claws and teeth everywhere. There was nowhere for them to run.
But then a solitary old man dressed all in white walked slowly out onto the battlefield. The minions of darkness parted for him, not knowing who he was or what he was doing there, but clearly recognizing the authority that was obviously his. The old man approached the Doctor, Leela and Thor. He wore a long white robe, and on top of his head, he wore a hat that seemed to be made out of a dove, with the dove's head sitting out in front. He smiled kindly at the Doctor and tapped the side of his nose, "Don't worry, Doctor. I have a cunning plan…" he said.
#
Thor suddenly found himself back in Valhalla with the rest of the gods. They were all seated at a table, drinking and singing and laughing. Nobody at the table seemed to notice his reappearance. And before Thor could ask them what was going on or how long he had been there, his memories of the battle began to slip away like a dream upon waking. Somebody slapped him on the back good naturedly as everybody laughed at a joke that Heimdall had just told. And then he was fully in the moment. All knowledge of Shada and Ragnarok now completely gone from his mind.
The Doctor, Leela and the Sontarans found themselves back on Gallifrey, fighting in the corridors of the Doctor's TARDIS. The Sontarans and Leela didn't seem to know what had happened to them. The Doctor did remember. But the memories only got in the way in his current situation.
Eventually, the Doctor outwitted the Sontarans by building a gun and shooting them with it.
And soon afterward, Rassilon, founder of Time Lord society, reached out from beyond his tomb, and he took it upon himself to erase the Doctor's recent memories. He now had no memory of saving Gallifrey from the Vardans and the Sontarans. He had no memory of breaking Thor out of Shada. And further, he had no memory of the message from his earlier self, and therefore no memory of why he had left Gallifrey in the first place. And so he continued the life of a renegade.
Leela could not remember their recent adventure either. In fact, her mind was so badly scrambled, that she decided she was in love with Andred, the commander of the Citadel guards. Commander Andred, never having been with a woman before, thought he might never get such an opportunity again, and told everyone that he loved Leela as well.
#
The white guardian then carried out the rest of his plan. Here, long millennia before the universe came to an end, he planned to use the key to time to circumvent even the need for Ragnarok. He recruited the Doctor to assembled the pieces of the key, which would set the universe on a different path… the right path, and so would never experience the final battle between good and evil.
And this time it would work, and goodness would finally prevail.
Mostly.
