a/n: hello! i have returned with some takaishida family angst and a platonic cuddle puddle please enjoy (also idk if i mentioned it here? I'm watching the 2020 reboot and it made me jealous so from this point forward everyone's going to have smartphones ty and good night)


Ch 04 || Those Who Smile Brightest

Takeru begged Yamato not to go home. At least, not to their mother's apartment.

Yamato had been a little surprised, at first, but after finding out that their mother planned to move to Kobe and take him along, he wasn't surprised. Facing their mother was the last thing he'd wanted to do; it was written all over his face.

So, three days after the news had been delivered, Yamato decided that he needed to meet with their parents to make a decision. Takeru, understandably, didn't want to participate—he was afraid of getting roped into something he didn't want to do, and he didn't want to cause a fight.

Hearing that was like being speared through the heart. In the end, he'd dropped Takeru off at Taichi and Hikari's place with the promise of returning once they finished their discussion. That way someone could keep an eye on Takeru, and he wouldn't be alone.

And after what happened in the digital world, and how Takeru reacted to their mother's decision… he didn't want to leave Takeru alone. Maybe he was being overdramatic, but he didn't want to risk it. What if something happened when he wasn't there?

The thought wasn't comforting, because he didn't exactly know the answer.

Yamato pushed it out of his mind so he could focus on the topic at hand: Takeru's living situation.

The air was practically bleeding tension. Yamato wondered why two grown adults still acted like this around each other even though the divorce was a decade ago, but then, he didn't exactly know what to say to his mother when she was around.

Except it was different now. He knew exactly what he was going to say to her, and he wasn't going to give in. Takeru, after all, wanted this badly, and he'd fight for him.

"Natsuko," his father said in lieu of a greeting, nodding shortly.

"Hiroaki," she responded, stepping inside tentatively. "Thank you for, um, for inviting me in."

His father only nodded again, closing the door behind her. Silence ensued, opening another path through which tension could travel, and slowly, awkwardly, the two of them made their way to the small table in their living room. They sat on opposite sides, with Yamato between them.

After about fifteen more seconds of uncomfortable silence, Yamato's brow twitched in annoyance.

"I want Takeru to live here," he said, with conviction. "With me and Dad. Permanently."

His mother's eyes widened in surprise, and she looked at his father, rather than Yamato. "Did you know he was going to say that?"

"Um." His dad sighed and scratched the back of his mind. "He did, uh, mention that Takeru might need a place to stay, which is why I agreed to meet with you. I assumed it was temporary?"

His mom quieted, pursing her lips. "So then, they told you I was planning to move?"

"It might have come up, yes. Though I wasn't sure of the details."

"It'd only be for six months. Nine at the latest."

"Oh?"

"Then we'd come back to Odaiba. It's an assignment from my boss, so yes, I assumed it would be temporary."

His dad nodded slowly. "I see."

"But Takeru doesn't want to move," Yamato said, narrowing his eyes. Suddenly it was as if he wasn't in the room, and he didn't like it. "He wants to stay in Odaiba."

She sighed, rubbing her temple. "He did react a bit… intensely to the news. I wanted to talk it out with him completely, and get everything out on the table, but then…" She paused. "And I thought he might need some space to think about it, but he's been over here for three days. And I haven't had the time to get him a cell phone yet, so I kept calling and messaging you…"

"I know," Yamato said woodenly. "I got them."

"And you ignored them after that night."

She wasn't accusing him of it. She wasn't being rude about it. It was a simple statement, and it happened to be true.

"You were right in saying that Takeru needed space," Yamato went on. "I thought that by answering you, it would only make him upset. So I didn't answer."

"And you didn't think about calling me?" His father raised an eyebrow.

She quieted again. Yamato looked at him. "That was my doing."

He met Yamato's gaze quizzically. "Is that right?"

"Takeru needed space, like I said. So I gave him space, and I didn't want to get you involved until he calmed down a bit."

His dad nodded once more. Repeated, "I see."

"...why do you want him to stay permanently?" his mom prompted.

Yamato met her gaze evenly. "He asked me."

It was true. Over the last few days, something had been bugging Takeru, more than just the burden of the knowledge of his mother's transfer. He'd confronted Takeru this morning about it, and…

"I love Mom, really, I do. But it's… lonely there, Nii-san. Patamon's away, and Mom's always working, and I know Dad's always working, too, but… it'll be different, because you're here, too... I just… if I leave, I don't know if I'll want to go back."

For a moment, she looked undeniably, irrevocably destroyed. Like it was the last possible answer she expected to receive. Her eyes widened with shock, brimming with tears, and her lip quivered as if she was ready to cry.

Yamato's resolve wavered but didn't break. Eventually, she just sighed again, and buried her head in her hands. They were trembling. But she didn't weep.

"Oh," she murmured. "Will… will you be able to afford it?"

The second part was probably directed toward his father, but Yamato spoke before he got the chance. "The band's been making decent money for a while. I can help."

"Yamato," his dad said, frowning sharply at him. "You're seventeen. You shouldn't have to help. That's our responsibility."

"He's my little brother," Yamato argued. "I have a responsibility to look after him, too."

"Yamato, look…" His mom began hesitantly. "...I know you've been protective of him since you were kids, but… really. You're still our child, and so is he."

"You don't think Takeru would have liked to join the conversation?" his dad added.

Yamato scowled. "He already told you he didn't want to move. He knew you'd only try to convince him, and he knows how much you guys fight. He didn't want to be around for that, so… he's at Taichi and Hikari's place."

"I wasn't going to guilt-trip him," she murmured, hands curling into fists. But she didn't respond to the other reason, and his dad didn't comment on it, either. "It… it does hurt me to see him so upset. But that's why I wanted to just talk to him, and see how we could make it work."

"Don't you see?" Yamato laughed, but the sound lacked any trace of humor. It was flat. Hollow. "This is making it work! You can go to Kobe, and he can stay here where he's happy."

She looked down at the table, forehead resting against her thumbs. She drew in a deep breath, and then: "...did he say that he wasn't happy? Living with me?"

Yamato fell silent, chewing the inside of his lip. He'd never used the word 'unhappy', but he knew it was written all over his face, woven intricately with aching loneliness, with the need to be around others.

It was a stark difference between them—while Yamato preferred to be alone, Takeru adored people, and he loved physical contact. Even now, when he had the opportunity to visit others during the day, an empty apartment awaited him when he arrived home. He loved spending time with his friends and family. That was something Yamato had picked up on long ago.

"You… you both work so much," he said carefully. "He rarely sees either of you and… and he's so lonely because of it. I mean, you've seen it, haven't you? He's… he's not like us. We don't really care for hugs and people and all that crap. But he craves affection and he thrives on it, and he's been starved of it! Don't you think it's time to give him what he needs?"

Both of them were stunned into silence. But Yamato wasn't done. So many things that Takeru had bottled up for a long time were finally breaking free, and with it came the things that Yamato hadn't known he'd bottled up until there wasn't enough space to contain it all.

Both of them were so close to reaching their breaking point, and finding out that their mother planned to move and separate them again was the last push they needed.

He was so full of repressed emotions that he couldn't breathe.

"And… and ok, I get it, Mom. I do. You don't cook, and a lot of the time you're not home to cook, so you don't have much time. But… but he's living on convenient snacks, and tv dinners, and instant stuff, and… and he needs more than that! You can't make him live like that just because you do."

"Yamato," his dad warned. "You shouldn't talk to your mother like that."

"I'm not saying you're not trying," Yamato went on, too frustrated to really pay attention to his father's reprimanding words. "I'm sorry if it's coming out rude. It's just… we have time to get him moved. It's not like he'll be stressed about school, right? And we're not…"

He clenched his fists on the table, so angry that his voice broke. His teeth slammed together, but it was going to come out whether he liked it or not. He lacked the capacity to store any more frustration for the sake of not causing a scene.

"I'm so tired of just living with your mistakes. We're not kids anymore, damn it," he hissed. "We were young enough back then that we didn't get much of a say in things. You guys got to make all the choices, and we just had to live with whatever they were. It was always 'do what Mom and Dad want us to do' and that's not fair. For once, can you involve your kids in your decisions? Don't we deserve that?"

In the wake of his outburst, his parents were left speechless and Yamato's heart was pounding. The force of his rage was enough to affect him physically, and though it took a long time to build up, it only took a few moments to leave.

It flowed out of him so quickly, so easily, and now there was finally enough room for air to get in and out. He could breathe again.

The same could not be said for his parents. They both looked as if they'd lost the ability to move and speak, let alone breathe. His mom was extremely pale, body tense, expression pulled taut with remorse and shock.

It was as if he'd slapped both of them across the face.

Then, suddenly, his mother started laughing. It was weak and croaky and empty—hardly considered laughter at all—and just as Yamato was getting ready to snap at her, she said, almost to herself, "We… really messed up, didn't we, Hiro?"

"...yeah. We did." A long, pregnant pause. "It's time we made it right, huh?"

"Yeah." She expelled a stuttering, scratchy breath and sniffled. Yamato saw a tear glisten underneath the light of the front room, but she was quick to wipe it away. "You're… sure this is what you boys want?"

A tiny ribbon of hope was wrapped carefully and skillfully around her words, near-undetectable, like she wanted Yamato to change his mind at the last minute. But Yamato's mind was already made up.

"Yeah," he murmured. "I'm sure."

Another silence. Another shaky sigh. "A-alright, then. We'll make it work. Won't we, Hiro?"

"Mm." He scratched his chin. "I… I think it'll be a little cramped, but… I could look into getting a bigger apartment."

"If… if you need any help," his mother offered, "let me know. Financially, I mean."

Yamato had already made his stance on the financial situation known, but his dad only nodded without acknowledging Yamato's previous offer.

That only brought forth another spark of annoyance in Yamato's veins, but he kept his mouth shut. He'd already delivered a critical blow with his words. He had to get out of here before he made things worse—before he said something that might make them change their minds.

"O...ok," he said breathlessly, pushing himself up without looking at either of them. "Ok. So it's settled, then."

"Yeah, hun," his mother said tiredly, rubbing her temple again. "It's settled."

"Good. I'm going back to Taichi's to get Takeru, then." He sped across the room to grab his keys and wallet, slipping on his shoes. But then: "...hey. Mom."

"...yes?"

"There's… there are some leftovers from last night in the fridge." He still didn't look at her. "Take them. All of them. You need some real food. You and Takeru both—you're too skinny. So don't forget to eat, and drink water. Get some rest."

He toyed with his keys, lingering in front of the door with his back facing her. He heard her breath catch with a near-silent sob.

"And… and don't forget to call him," he added. "He'll miss you. He always misses you. Once or twice a week. Call him, and let him know you haven't forgotten him. Because he will think that. So… at least once a week."

"O...ok," she whispered brokenly. "Once a week."

"And?"

"And let him know you haven't forgotten him."

"...and?"

"And don't forget to eat," she echoed, hiccuping. "And drink water, and… and rest…"

"Good." Still, he hesitated. "Don't drive until you're calm enough. You might get into an accident."

"O-k."

"Ok."

"I… I love you, hun. Be safe."

Yamato swallowed the knot in his throat. His reply was a soft, choked hum, and then he was out the door.


Half an hour ago, Hikari and Takeru had picked out a movie, but it was obvious neither of them were really paying much attention to it. Hikari had seen it before, and it was one she usually adored, but her mind was a pool of worry, and her thoughts were scattered about in the water. She couldn't reel her focus back in no matter how hard she tried.

"You look exhausted, Takeru."

She hit pause on the remote after she said the words, turning to face him. Her statement was true—Takeru's eyes were webbed and shadowed and heavy, and he looked ready to pass out on her couch.

Part of her expected him to deny it. Takeru had always been that way—he never wanted anyone to worry about him, even if his friends' concerns were justified. She knew this not only because he was her best friend, but also because… she did the exact same thing.

To her surprise, he just sighed with a humorless smile and rubbed his eyes. "Can't hide anything from you, huh?"

"Guess you can't," Hikari replied with a tiny smile of her own, but it dissolved quickly. "Do you want to talk about it? Is everything alright?"

Takeru didn't answer right away. She wondered—not for the first time—if he wasn't doing well because of something that had happened before she, Yamato, and Iori found him outside that forest. But if he had, wouldn't he have told her (or at least, Yamato) about it by now? It'd been days.

"Things are going to change," he said finally, softly.

Hikari blinked, trying to decipher what that meant, but his response was so vague and mysterious that it could have alluded to anything. Change because… of Mirrormon? Did he actually get to Takeru?

The thought made her heart sink into the well of her stomach. She parted her lips to ask what, exactly, would change, but he spoke first.

"Things at home are… weird."

"...yeah?"

"Yeah," Takeru echoed, looking at his lap. "I think my mom's upset with me."

"Because you're spending so much time with Yamato?"

"I… I think so."

Hikari wasn't sure what to say to that. She couldn't imagine why she would be upset that Yamato and Takeru were spending time together, but she didn't live inside Takeru's mother's head.

"I think it's great that you're spending time with him," she decided to say, smiling again. "I know you don't see him a lot."

He didn't look up. Didn't even react when she reached over to place her hand on his. His lips didn't even twitch.

"But there's… something else, isn't there?" Hikari persisted, squeezing his fingers gently.

Again, Takeru was silent. He sat as still as a doll, and it scared her. Takeru was usually so optimistic and radiant and alive—whether he knew it or not, he lit up the entire room with his smile. Now, he was the exact opposite. Like—

Then: "My mom is transferring outside of Odaiba. Outside of Tokyo. She's moving to Kobe."

Her head was already building a mental map, attempting to figure out where that was and how far away it was from the city they'd protected so many times in the past. She didn't make it that far before Takeru spoke again.

"She wants me to go with her."

Deeper. Deeper. It seemed the well of her stomach had become a bottomless chasm, and nothing existed below to slow the momentum of her plummeting heart. Her breath was trapped along with it, pulled down by her heart like a cement block weighing down a corpse.

"...are you?"

A long pause. Hikari waited patiently but in her mind, she was begging him to answer soon so she could breathe again.

"I don't know," Takeru said finally. "Nii-san… offered me a place to stay so I wouldn't have to go."

"Oh," she said, a traitorous thread of relief weaving through her. Down, down, down, to catch her breath. To catch her heart. "I see."

"Living with Nii-san is all I've ever wanted..."

She squeezed his fingers, silently offering comfort as his words stumbled again.

"It makes me feel like… like we're actually siblings again. But…" His body went rigid. "What if Mom is upset? If I choose Nii-san?"

"Why do you think she'll be upset?"

"Because then she'd be alone." His voice wobbled. "She'd have no one to look after her. Do you think it makes me a bad person for… for leaving her?"

Hikari pressed her cheek into his shoulder. "You're not leaving her, Takeru. I'm sure she'll understand."

"But I'm all she has. I feel like I'm abandoning her," Takeru went on. He took a deep breath, like he was trying to balance the weight of something heavy. Something unseen by Hikari. "At the same time… she didn't even ask me what I wanted to do. She just told me that we're moving, and she'd already accepted so she couldn't just back out of it.

"I don't really know much about the situation—what if she was under a lot of pressure to accept? What if she'd be punished if she said no? I don't know, and so it makes me feel selfish for fighting her decision. I just… I wish she didn't have to go because then I wouldn't have to pick a side like this."

Tears clouded Hikari's vision as she heard the anguish in Takeru's voice. Her hand tightened around hers, wishing she knew what to say. Wishing she could do something to help. But her parents weren't divorced—she didn't know what it was like to pick where she wanted to live. She didn't fully understand the burden of growing up in a broken home, and so…

"At the same time," Takeru continued abruptly, shoulders growing even tenser, "another part of me wants to stay here. Why should I care if she's alone when she's always leaving me alone? It's not fair. I know she works and I'm old enough to look after myself, but does she have to work all the time?"

His voice broke. That was what pushed Hikari into action—she shifted her weight, releasing his hand so she could embrace him. Her arms wrapped around his waist, and she could feel his body trembling. Still, he didn't cry.

But she was crying. She hated that her best friend was in pain. She always wanted to be there for him, and she wanted to make it better. But it was out of her control; there wasn't anything she could do, and it made her feel helpless.

Her throat constricted with a sob, and Takeru chuckled brokenly. "No, please don't cry, Hikari. You'll make me cry."

She didn't respond verbally because she didn't trust herself to speak. She knew Takeru was lonely—she could see it in his eyes the moment they met, could recognize it for what it was because she felt herself—but he rarely talked about it like this. It broke her heart to think that he'd kept it to himself all this time.

"I'm… I'm sorry things are this way," she choked out finally. "You… you know you can come see me anytime, right?"

Takeru relaxed in her embrace like a cat melting under the gentleness of affection. "I know, Hikari… thank you…"

"And I don't think you're a bad person for choosing to stay," she whispered into his shoulder. "You're a wonderful person. You deserve to put your happiness first. I know you love your mom, but… you've got to do what's best for you."

He was still shaking. "...you think so?"

"Yes. Do what you want to do, Takeru." She looked up at him with a watery smile, blinking away more tears. "And… and I'd miss you, if you left."

"I'd miss you, too. I'd… I'd miss everyone. I don't want to leave."

Something was wedged deep within those words. Something dark and isolated and haunting, like a shadow that clung to him everywhere he went. She wanted to chase it away and keep it away, but she couldn't push him to elaborate further when he'd already trusted her enough to share this burden with her.

Takeru took another deep breath, this one less shaky than before. Then he laughed a croaky, sheepish, but genuine laugh. "A-anyway… I'm sorry. I didn't expect all of that to come out."

She shook her head, pulling away to wipe her eyes. "No. I appreciate that you told me. It's better to get it off your chest than to let it crush you."

Their gazes met as the last of her tears tried up, red-brown peering into pools of blue, and…

And she saw a speck of red dancing in his iris. Hikari blinked and it was gone, but it was enough to make her frown.

Takeru blinked, too, now looking confused. "What?"

Had she imagined it? Maybe she had. Takeru did look extremely tired, so that had to be it. She mentally shook herself and smiled again at him. "It's nothing. You… you should get some rest. You look like you need it."

Takeru shrugged. "Nah. I'm not that tired. Besides, we were watching a movie."

"Well, I'll go get some blankets and we'll finish the movie," she decided, nodding for emphasis. "Or we can pick another one. I'll be right back."

"Hikari—"

"I'll be right back," she repeated, already standing.

Takeru laughed again, like he knew he couldn't argue. "...alright."

She made her way to the room she shared with her brother, and when she opened it, Taichi met her gaze immediately. He was sitting on the bottom bunk with a concerned expression.

"...is everything ok?" he asked quietly. "I heard you two talking."

Her smile faded somewhat, though it didn't fully disappear. She had a feeling, from the look on his face, that he'd overheard. Their walls were thin, after all. She was lucky their mom was out. "I… I think he'll be ok. He just needs a friend right now."

"Yeah?"

"Yeah," she echoed. "Now scooch. I'm going to borrow your blanket."

"Why mine?"

"Because I only have one and I need two!"

"Fine, fine," Taichi relented. "Should I go out there and be a friend, too? He might need a bear hug."

She rolled her eyes good-naturedly as she snagged his blanket up. "I'm not sure. I think he's done talking about it, for now. We're just going to relax now. But I said I'd be back, so…"

Taichi laughed as she struggled to pull her blanket down from the top bunk, and she made a point of ignoring him. She was, after all, rather petite and these blankets were thick.

"Need help?"

"Nope!"

She yanked hard and clumsily darted out of the room before he could laugh again, and Takeru looked up.

"Don't you laugh, too," she warned, with no real heat in her words.

"Hey now. I'm not that tall, either, in case you haven't noticed."

"Don't complain. You're taller than me."

She stumbled into the sofa, and they both chuckled as that sent one of the blankets toppling onto Takeru. She decided impulsively to pick another movie, and five minutes later, they were in front of the tv again, bundled up like it was winter, with the only light being the kitchen from behind.

Thirty minutes after that, something soft bumped her shoulder.

Hikari blinked, craning her neck to see Takeru, eyes closed, leaning heavily into her side. His breath fanned her skin, soft and slow. A faint smile pulled at her lips. Definitely asleep.

"And you said you weren't tired," she whispered teasingly, fondly. "You'll hurt your back sleeping like that."

Carefully, soundlessly, she coaxed his body down so his head was pillowed on her lap, shifting ever so slightly and turning her attention back toward the screen. Lowered the volume of the tv so it wouldn't disturb him.

Peaceful dreams, Takeru, she thought. I hope you feel less heavy now.

A door creaked open. Taichi stepped out, looking ready to say something until he saw that Takeru had fallen asleep.

"Yamato's on his way back," he murmured. And then: "Dang. He must've been beat."

Hikari nodded. "Yeah. It's hard to sleep when your mind's racing so much."

She hoped, now that Takeru had a chance to talk out his feelings, that sleep would come easier for him. She hoped he'd be alright. That this quick rest would heal the damage caused to him by indecision and anxiety.

"I guess that's true," Taichi said after a moment's pause. Slowly, he walked to the far end of the sofa and fixed the blanket so Takeru's feet were covered. When he came back to her side, his head came down on her head to ruffle her hair. "You're good to him."

She smiled down at Takeru's peaceful expression. "I do my best."

"I'm sure he appreciates it."

She thought back to the mysterious shadows clinging to Takeru's words. To the heartbreaking way his voice faltered as he confided in her. To the fleeting speck of red his eyes that she'd swore she imagined.

"Yeah," she breathed out, moving a stray hair away from Takeru's eyes. "He's such a gentle spirit. I didn't realize until today… that he could be angry about a lot of things. He could have turned out to be a different person. He could have been cold, pessimistic, or filled with hate. But… he's not. He's the kindest person I know."

"He is that way, huh?"

"Yeah." Hikari expelled a slow, unhurried breath. "He is."

She'd heard in the past that those who suffer the most are the ones who smile brightest, the ones whose souls radiate the most warmth. Looking at Takeru now, she believed it to be true.

Please don't ever change, she added mentally. Whatever you do, Takeru… just don't change.