September came with lots of rain, which resulted in high levels of humidity. Nathan wiped his forehead after his morning run, guzzling the last of his water as he climbed the porch steps. Elizabeth was already at work, so Nathan had decided to get in a run and a shower before his therapy session. In the seven weeks since he'd been talking with Shane Cantrell, his nightmares had dramatically decreased. Nathan was incredibly grateful, but now when he went to bed, he wasn't sure whether he would have a restful night or a nightmare-ridden one. They seemed to come when he least expected it, jolting him awake in the middle of the night, breathing hard and sweating. He almost always inadvertently woke Elizabeth too when he suddenly sat up straight in their bed, and she would gently wrap her arms around him and lay him back down, talking to him in a soothing voice until he was calm enough to fall asleep again.

He hoped the nightmares would finally come to an end soon. He hated that they were still happening, but he was thankful that they were getting less frequent.

Nathan showered quickly, then got into his car and drove to Shane's office. He walked in, shaking Shane's hand. "Hey, Doc."

"Hi, Nathan," Shane said, chuckling at Nathan's title for him. "Have a seat."

"Thanks," Nathan said, taking the bottle of water Shane handed him. They both got situated, and after a minute of small talk, Shane got down to business. "So how many nightmares did you have in the past week?"

"Two," Nathan said, taking a sip of water.

"And on a scale of one to ten, how bad were they this time?"

"Probably about a five," Nathan answered.

"Is Elizabeth still harmed in them?" Shane asked, tilting his head.

Nathan paused, thinking. "No, she's not," he said, a sense of surprise washing over him. "I can't believe I didn't realize that."

Shane nodded. "I think your subconscious is starting to realize that she's safe," he said. "This is a good thing." He tapped his pen. "Are they still waking you up when you have them?"

"Yes," Nathan said. "Elizabeth usually is the one to calm me down again."

"Do you have nightmares after she calms you?" Shane asked.

"No."

"Good, good," Shane said, jotting down some notes. "What is it that wakes you up when you have these dreams?"

Nathan thought for a moment. "I think it's the sensation of falling, after getting shot. I always jolt awake right before hitting the ground."

"How does that make you feel?" Shane asked.

"Terrified," Nathan admitted. "It's a very scary feeling."

"I imagine it is," Shane said with a nod. He put the notebook and pen aside, then looked Nathan in the eye. "Is this causing you stress throughout the day?"

"Sometimes," Nathan said. "Most of the time I'm fine, but other times I feel so tense I'm not sure how to let things go…" He trailed off, eyes widening as a thought occurred to him.

"What is it?" Shane asked, seeing the look in Nathan's eyes.

Guilt pierced Nathan, irrational but undeniable. "Elizabeth and I have been trying to conceive for several months now. What if my stress is preventing her from getting pregnant? What if that's impacting our ability to have a baby?"

Shane paused. "How long have you been married?"

"Almost nine months."

"And how long have you been trying to have a baby?"

"Four months," Nathan replied.

Shane sat back, drawing in a breath before speaking. "It's possible. Stress has been known to keep a couple from conceiving. But we don't know for sure if that is why the two of you haven't conceived yet. Four months really isn't that long, Nathan. Give it a few more months, and if it still hasn't happened, you two might consider seeing a doctor to rule out any physical incapabilities."

A shudder went through Nathan at the thought of them struggling with infertility. He had never considered that before, and he fervently hoped they wouldn't have to deal with that. Shane must have seen the panic in his eyes, because he spoke in his gentle therapist voice. "Nathan, that's a long shot. You and Elizabeth are a little older than most people are when they first have children, and sometimes it's just harder to conceive in your thirties than it would have been in your twenties. But you're both still young and have plenty of time to start a family. Try not to worry about it."

"Because that would only add more stress, and possibly make it even harder to have a baby…" Nathan could feel himself spiraling down a rabbit hole, his heart breaking for Elizabeth. How would he be able to live with himself if he was the reason they couldn't conceive…?

"Nathan!" Shane's voice broke through his thoughts, sharp and firm. "Stop it. Right now. There is no use borrowing trouble for tomorrow. Now focus."

"On what?" Nathan asked, Shane's direct words getting his attention.

"Sit up straight," Shane told him. "We're going to try some tapping therapy."

Nathan raised a brow. "Tapping therapy?" His forehead crinkled. "What's that?"

"You tap various points on your face and body that are connected to your nervous system," Shane answered. "Your thoughts have a strong impact on the nervous system, so you tap certain points while repeating different phrases that correct your thinking."

"Correct my thinking?"

"Yes," Shane said with a firm nod. "Your thoughts have a big impact on what's going on inside of you. If your thoughts are messed up, your body is messed up. You currently seem to be internalizing some thoughts that aren't necessarily true, and we're going to nip that in the bud. This might also help with your nightmares, and it's something you can do at any time and any place once you have the technique down. Ready?"

"Um, I guess so," Nathan said, feeling bewildered. He had no idea what to expect.

"Follow my motions and repeat after me," Shane said, bringing his hand to his forehead and tapping firmly. "I have a wonderful wife who loves me." Nathan copied him and repeated the words. Shane moved his hand to under one eye. "We have a good life together." His hand moved to his cheekbone. "And even if we can't have children," his hand moved to his chin, "I deeply and completely accept myself."

"What?!" Nathan said, his hand dropping to his side. "Are you kidding?"

"Not at all," Shane said, eyebrows raised. "This is a proven therapy technique, Nathan. You'd be surprised at how helpful it can be."

"It feels ridiculous!" Nathan exclaimed. "And how is it going to help?"

"I'll give you a book to read on the subject," Shane said without missing a beat. "But we need to go through this process a few times, and I need you to cooperate. Can you do that?"

Nathan wanted to resist. Shane must have seen the struggle in his eyes, because he remained quiet and let Nathan think. Finally, Nathan grunted with a nod. "Fine. We'll try this your way."

"Good," Shane said. "Now, tap and repeat after me."

Nathan followed his every move, feeling absolutely ridiculous but trusting that Shane knew what he was doing. Once their session was over, Shane clasped Nathan's hand. "Thank you for trusting me, Nathan. I promise this will be helpful." He handed him a book. "And here is the scientific proof behind it." He chuckled. "I get the sense you need the facts before believing something."

Smiling wryly, Nathan nodded. "Yes, I do like to have all the facts on something. Thank you, Shane."

"You're welcome. See you next week."

Nathan drove to the police station. The tapping therapy had felt so strange, but he hoped the book would convince him of the veracity of the method used. He walked into the station, running smack into Lee.

"Oh good, you're here!" Lee exclaimed. "We need to get down to the beach. There was another call about a disturbance from old man Davis just now. We need to go talk to him."

"Alright then," Nathan said, turning around to follow Lee. They got into a cruiser and headed for the beach. Nathan looked over at Lee in amusement. "You know, this is the sort of thing officers deal with. You still settling into being a detective?"

Lee chuckled. "We could have sent Hickam or one of the other officers, but Davis trusts us. I get the sense he will be more cooperative for you and me than he would be for one of the officers he doesn't know as well."

"Fair point," Nathan said. "You think of everything, Lee."

Lee snorted. "I don't know about everything. Did you know I completely forgot that my and Rosie's wedding anniversary is tomorrow? I can't believe it! I need to get her a gift stat, and a nice one at that or she won't talk to me for a week."

Nathan laughed. "Rosemary wouldn't give you the silent treatment, Lee."

Lee cocked a brow. "Have you met my wife?"

Nathan smiled. "I can tell you right now that she would love a quiet evening with just her husband. Why don't you bring the kids over tomorrow afternoon? Elizabeth and I can watch them while you go sweep your wife off her feet and present her with that gift you still need to pick out," he said with a wink.

Lee perked up. "Really? You'd be okay with that?"

"Absolutely," Nathan said. "We'd be happy to watch them. You and Rosemary deserve alone time together. Take it."

"Thanks, Nathan," Lee said, gratitude shining from his eyes. "Rosie will be thrilled." They pulled into the parking lot, where they saw Davis was puttering around with his walker, yelling at nonexistent teenagers to stop their pranks.

Lee raised a brow. "Here goes nothing," he said with a chuckle.


Elizabeth crested a hill, her breath catching at the beautiful view in front of her. In the middle of the jungle lay a crystal clear lake, fed by a waterfall and feeding a stream that followed down along the trail. Nathan came up behind her, taking some time to catch his breath from the steep incline of the final hill. They had decided to go on a hike together, one of their favorite activities. Today they were trying a trail they'd never done before, taking them through miles of jungle and leading to this mountain lake.

"Oh, this is stunning," Elizabeth said softly, feeling an almost sacredness at the pure, untouched beauty of the lake. Not many people knew about this trail, and they hadn't passed a single person on their way to the lake. No one was in the water either. They had it all to themselves.

Nathan took her hand as they walked to the water. "I've never seen a more picturesque end to a hike," he said with a smile. They took off their hiking clothes, revealing the bathing suits underneath, and jumped into the lake. The water was cool and refreshing after the hike through the heat and humidity. Elizabeth let herself tread the water, enjoying the feel of it against her skin. They splashed around a bit, getting into a teasing water fight. Elizabeth discovered that the lake was shallow enough to stand in, and she stood to wring some water from her hair. She suddenly felt something slimy brush against her leg and she screamed, launching herself into Nathan's arms. He looked down into the clear water, laughing. "Did the seaweed get you?" he teased, flicking it away with his foot.

Elizabeth shuddered, leaning her head against his chest. "It was slimy," she said in disgust.

Nathan laughed, his chest rumbling under her head. "This seems familiar," he said, his voice low and intimate.

Elizabeth looked up with a smile. "You mean from our little trip to Paradise Island?"

He nodded. "You threw yourself into my arms in that pool, too. Except this time it was seaweed, not a fish." His blue eyes twinkled as he winked at her.

Elizabeth slid her arms around his neck. "I thought for sure you were going to kiss me in that moment," she said. "But you didn't."

"True," Nathan said, pulling her closer. Weightless in the water, Elizabeth wrapped her legs around his waist, something about their wet skin heightening the intimacy of the moment. Nathan's eyes were trained on her lips. "We can remedy that right now," he whispered before claiming her lips with his. Their kiss quickly became passionate, and by the time they pulled back slightly they were both breathing hard and filled with desire, though they knew this was not the time nor the place to give in to their feelings.

"Elizabeth," Nathan said, whispering her name against her lips. "Can I ask you something?"

She pulled back. They were at eye level with the way he was holding her, and she could see that something serious was on his mind. "Of course you can," she said, brushing some of his wet hair back from his forehead. "What is it?"

He took a deep breath. "Do you ever wonder if my stress from these nightmares is preventing us from having a baby?"

She blinked. The thought had never crossed her mind. "No," she said honestly. "Do you think that?"

He was quiet for a moment, his throat working. "I wonder sometimes," he said, looking down, unable to meet her eyes. "I feel a sense of guilt that I could be the reason we haven't conceived yet."

"Nathan," Elizabeth said, framing his face in her hands. "Look at me." When he did, she continued. "It might not have happened for us yet, but I believe it will. Maybe the timing just hasn't been right." She pressed a gentle kiss to his lips. "But I think it will happen for us. Maybe not right away, maybe a year down the road, but I believe we will have a baby." She threaded her fingers through his hair. "Maybe I've put too much pressure on myself," she said thoughtfully. "I wanted a baby so badly I felt like it had to happen right away. When it didn't, I felt like it had to happen the next time we tried." She took a deep breath. "I didn't tell you this earlier, but I missed my period last month. I was so excited I bought a pregnancy test, and it came out positive. But…"

"But?" Nathan asked gently, his blue eyes prompting her to continue.

"But I went to see Carson, just to be sure before I told you. It was a false positive. I'm not pregnant." She let out a breath. "I think the pressure has been too much. So I came to a decision." She smiled. "I'm not going to get my hopes up unless I miss two periods in a row, and even then I'll have Carson take the test, not buy one from the store, just to be sure." She pressed another kiss to his lips, lingering there for a while. "When it happens, it happens," she whispered, her lips moving to his cheek. "And when it happens, it'll be when God meant it to be." She chuckled. "Because clearly it's not for lack of us trying."

A grin spread across Nathan's face, and his lips pressed gently against her neck. "It's most definitely not for lack of trying," he said huskily, looking back at her. "But I do hope it's sooner rather than later," he admitted.

Elizabeth smiled. "So do I, sweetheart. But we need to let that go. We can't control when we conceive our baby. But we can control our outlook about it. I choose to have a positive outlook." She cupped his cheek in her hand. "What about you?"

Nathan nodded, pulling her closer and letting her rest her head on his shoulder. "I choose the same."

They stood there for several minutes just holding each other, and then Nathan carried her to the shore. They set out their towels on the soft grass and stretched out in the sun, letting the heat dry them. Elizabeth reached out, taking Nathan's hand in hers. No words were needed as they lay there in the warmth of the sun surrounded by paradise. A peace settled over Elizabeth, a knowledge that everything was going to work out somehow, someway. It might not be how they planned it, but they were going to get through this.

Together.