Note: I have never written before, just did this to practice my English, but it took so much of my time that I wanted to share.I think it went well for the first try, but since English isn't my first language and I didn't have a beta reader, please be kind.

The order of events of this story and the game may not be the same.


Shepard waved at Liara as the elevator door against the cold wall, feeling completely exhausted, a tired sigh escaped her was, once more, checking on her crew after another mission, especially worried about Liara after the mess in the Ardat-Yakshi Monastery, but relieved after talking to seemed as okay as she could be in the situation.

Shepard ran her fingers through her hair slowly while taking a deep being brought back by Cerberus, it felt like she never had a moment to rest, more and more the weight of the world, damn, of the whole universe fell on her shoulders, and only a few people were willing to support her through all this mess.

"But not him." - Shepard shook her head trying to keep those thoughts away, she didn't have the time for this, for her, for them.

Why did she even allow Alenko back at the Normandy?They were done since leaving Earth, she was so relieved that he was safe, just to have her heart cut at every word of doubt thrown at her during the talk at the hospital, she hoped that they could keep it Cerberus attacked the citadel, then there he was, pointing a gun at her.

When he asked to join her crew, she couldn't have him questioning her every couldn't handle it, and she sure didn't need it in the middle of a the sorry look in his eyes, the gentle tone of his voice, asking her to let him fight this war with the Normandy, with their crew, and she just couldn't deny and send him to Hackett, leaving him alone, turning her back on him.

"How was it so easy for him to turn away when I was the one asking for a chance?" - an angry sigh left her the time.

Shepard fixed her posture when the elevator was about to arrive at the shuttle bay, her last needed to check up on James, who hit his head pretty badly during the last .Chakwas said he was fine, but even so, it was her job to check on him, she wouldn't be able to go on with her day otherwise.

As the door opens, she walked in, waving at Cortez who was working in the simply nods at her with a soft then sees James working on the guns with… her was relieved when she couldn't find him in his usual spots on the crew deck, it was so hard for her to try and keep things normal between them.

- Commander - Kaidan's voice filled the room as soon as she got close, disturbing her thoughts - Something you need? - she noticed he seemed nervous, both of them did every time they tried to talk.

- Hey, Lola! - James said with a wide smile on his face - I knew you couldn't stay away.

- Not really Major, just checking the crew - she tried to sound calm, answering him first - Oh, before I forget, EDI found something about your students, you should check with her.

- Thank you, Shepard - They stared at each other for a few seconds before she shifted her attention to James.

- And about you LT - she started with a mocking smile, trying to change her focus - Just wanted to be sure you were Doctor said you were okay, in her words, " he doesn't have that much of a brain to risk having brain damage" but you know, can't be too careful.- She could hear a light laugh coming from Cortez and a few others in there, even Kaidan cracked a smile but turned back to his weapon on the table ignoring them.

- And what if I got really hurt? - he stepped closer with a teasing smile, catching her attention - would you…nurse me back to health, Commander?Maybe even taking out that old jacket and putting on a nurse outfit? - her smile widened, how could he say that to his Commander?

- The nurse outfit is surely a if you want this jacket off so much - she lowered her voice while stepping closer - you can come and take it off yourself, LT - she looked him straight in the eyes while smiling, challenging noticed Kaidan moved to the other side of the room right after by the corner of her eyes.

- What?N-no, I didn't mean… - he ran his fingers through his hair 'till his nape, clearly nervous, giving a step back trying to put more distance between them - I'm…Just joking with you, Lola.

- And you think I'm serious, Jimmy? - he cleared his throat clearly uncomfortable while Shepard laughed at him

- I love how you make him all awkward, Commander - Cortez said laughing - Why do you even start it? - he said looking at James, receiving deadly stares in return.

- Oh, Jimmy - Shepard said, patting him on the arm - You shouldn't start if you are not ready to go all the , I'm glad you are clearly okay, so I will be taking my leave - she said while making her way to the elevator - See you guys later.

She was relieved that everyone seemed okay, even more, that James was really finally could go to her room, hoping to finally have some was the last time she slept more than 4 hours?But before she pressed anything, James ran in her direction keeping the doors raised an eyebrow looking at him.

- Something else you needed, James?

- No just…- he looked around trying to find the words - Are you okay too, Lola? - He looked at her with a serious face.

She must have looked really confused since he got her off a moment, they just stared at each let out a small sigh and smiled softly at him.

- Yes, I'm okay too, James.

- It's just, you know - he said slowly, choosing his words carefully - You are always taking care of everyone, checking on everyone, but we know things are hard for you the most, you know?So if you ever need to talk, or whatever…- he avoided her eyes.

James was not the first to offer to talk, Shepard knew how worried the crew was about her, Liara was always showing up at her quarters to check on her and even Garrus would try to talk to her about… was thankful to them, but she knew she didn't have time not to be okay, this war is so much bigger than anything she was feeling, she would worry about that when it was all over.

- I know James - Shepard reached to James's head, lightly caressing his hair while smiling at him - Thank you for looking after me.I'll tell you if I need go back to fix those guns, I need you ready for the next mission - She stepped away and pressed the panel.

- Aye, aye ma'am - he said quietly watching the door closing.


Kaidan watched as Shepard entered the room, quietly greeting couldn't help feeling a little he got back to the Normandy things between them were uncomfortable, to say the things weren't good before, pointing a gun at her sure didn't wanted to talk to her, but couldn't find the right time or the right words.

- Commander - He said as she got close - Something you need?

- Hey, Lola!I knew you couldn't stay away - Kaidan couldn't help but frown at knew about James's habit of flirting with anything that moved, even with his commander, but it still really pissed him.

- Not really Major, just checking the crew - Major…How long has it been since she called him by his name?No Major, no Alenko, just Kaidan. - Oh, before I forget, EDI found something about your students, you should check with her.

- Thank you, Shepard - He has been anxiously awaiting news about his students, but instead of going to EDI, he stayed there, looking at her, trying to think of anything to start a conversation, anything to talk about.

- And about you LT - Her voice spread throughout the room - Just wanted to be sure you were Doctor said you were okay, in her words, " he doesn't have that much of a brain to risk having brain damage" but you know, can't be too careful.- He cracked a smile at them while turning back to his weapon on the table, trying to distract himself from their conversation knowing that the time for them to talk was lost.

- Would you…nurse me back to health, Commander? - He felt his heart tightening at James's dare he talk like that with his Commander?

- But if you want this jacket off so much - her voice was was she doing? - you can come and take it off yourself, LT. - He moved to the other side of the room as his blood started to boil, pretending to look for something.

He listened as they went, as the crew laughed, as she could she say those things to James in front of everyone?In front of him?Even if they are just joking, that's not the left a tired sigh they were saying was not the issue, but to hear her flirting with James made him jealous, and he didn't have the right to be, he knew it.

He walked back to the table as Shepard said her goodbyes, watching as James walked fast to get to the elevator before it got curious about what they were talking seemed confused at first, then she smiled at James, caressing his looked away trying to focus on the guns to take his head off them.

James returned to the table and quietly went back to help Kaidan with the worked in silence for a while, Kaidan wanted to ask what was that about, to ask what was going on between struggled to find the words, and before he could, James broke the Silence.

- Hey, Major, you have known Shepard for a long time, right? - Kaidan stopped working and looked at James confused - Do the two of you talk about all this? - James stopped what he was doing and looked at Kaidan.

- All this what?

- I don't know - Kaidan frowned at him not understanding what was this conversation about - About all this mess?The war, the missions, the collectors, Cerberus? - James seemed concerned.

- No, we don't really talk anymore. - Kaidan said was hard to admit it. - Shepard and I had a…disagreement long ago when she started to work with were close, yes, but we haven't been for a while are you asking?

- I'm worried - he confessed putting both hands on the table, leaning on it while looking down - She said she is fine, but obviously, she is not.

- And how do you know that?

- How can anyone be fine in the middle of the end of, hell, everything?- he said in a low voice - I talked with the rest of the crew, and they got the same answer from her, "I'm fine".I was hoping you got something else - James let out a heavy stayed quiet for a while before James finally broke the silence again.

- Wait - He straightened himself up, looking at Kaidan - you two had a 'disagreement' when she joined with Cerberus?How long ago was that?

- I'm not sure…eight months?Maybe ten?Why? - He talked slowly and raised one eyebrow.

- It's just…you may wanna hurry and fix that, man. - James looked serious - I don't want to be nosy, but we may not get out of this war alive, you almost didn't on 's a good time to make amends.I mean, would you be okay with dying without fixing things up?

- And how do you know I'm the one who needs to apologize? - he asked crossing his arms.

- Never said that, but does it really matter who apologizes first?If saying "I'm sorry" is enough to make things right, why not just do it?Who cares who says it first?Also, no offense, but letting Cerberus get between you two sounds stupid, you guys were just raiding their base together a couple of days ago - Kaidan was caught off guard, but he knew James was right.

- What if it isn't enough? - He said in a low voice, leaning on the table, looking at the guns. - What if it changes nothing?

- Well, it's still better than doing nothing, no?Also, Joker pretty much killed her and they are fine, you can't have done worse.

He let a little chuckle escape him at James's blankly stared at the weapons while thinking about she appeared working with Cerberus he has been keeping a grudge against her, feeling betrayed, wanting an explanation and maybe an now it was clear she did what she needed in order to stop the collectors, so maybe it was time for him to let it all behind.


It seemed like an eternity since he arrived at her door.A few days have passed after the conversation with James at the shuttler bay, and Kaidan couldn't stop thinking about kept on showing at her door but always turned remembered talking to the crew when Shepard allowed him to return to the Horizon, about was furious with also made clear that she wouldn't accept him messing with Shepard's Garrus took the time to tell him how he had let Shepard down at her worst.

Still, he couldn't forget it, how torn he was when she died, how he mourned her for two long years, how much he missed then, after all that pain, out of nowhere, she shows up, working with the enemy, as nothing felt so didn't she contact him?Why let him suffer for all that time?Was her death a lie so she could join Cerberus?Did she even die?If they brought her back, was it really her?Or just some puppet looking like her doing Cerberus work?

He shook his didn't matter now, did it?A loud sigh left would talk about how hurt he was for two years, but after Shepard reappeared, the time they spent apart was on could he just let her go after finally having her back from the dead?

- Major? - his thoughts were interrupted by her soft voice behind him - Is everything okay? - He turned to the elevator behind him, seeing her walking off of looked tired, she'd try to keep a straight face for the crew, but James was right, it was clear she wasn't fine, this war was weighing on her.

- Yes - he finally said after a long pause just looking at her - Just wanted to you have time, of course.

- Please, come on in. - She looked confused, probably because of how long it took for him to answer, or about how strange he sounded.

She walked past him and he followed her inside the walked down the stairs, going to the desk on the could see her grabbing a datapad and reading something at anxious when she didn't say anything, he followed her downstairs, but waited on the opposite side of the room, by the fish knew she wouldn't look at him or start a conversation herself, she never did since he got wouldn't talk to him if it wasn't necessary, and even when she did, she would make it as quick as possible.

For a moment he stayed there, just looking at though she was evidently exhausted by the situation they were in, she was still put a strand of her golden hair behind her ear, while her green eyes ran through the text on the datapad, biting her red lips, trying to concentrate on gave a soft smile, thinking about all the times he saw the same scene back on the SR-1, before they even got would sit at the crew deck with her datapad doing whatever and he would quietly admire her, just like that.

- Liv - he talked softly, making her heart stop for a long was it since he called by her name so sweetly - Can you please look at me so we can talk?

- About what? - she asked without turning to knew what he wanted to talk about, but she wasn't ready for it.

- About all this - he replied - We have been avoiding each other, we never talked about all that happened at Horizon, about Cerberus.

She gave a long sigh out, closing her eyes shut, was so tired of all this, and this talk wouldn't make things any easier for her, but he wouldn't let go, she knew the datapad on the desk in front of her, it took a moment, but she finally turned to him, leaning at the desk, looking straight into his eyes, and he couldn't help but notice how empty hers looked.

- Okay - she started with a weak voice and blank expression - What do you want from me now, Alenko?

He frowned at her and couldn't help feeling angry at her was making an effort to make things right between them, why not do the same and meet him in the middle?Every time he would try to talk to her she would have the same damn attitude and he was tired of felt as his anger got the best of him as he started to walk left and right.

- How about an apology? - he regretted these words the moment he said was exactly the opposite of why he was there, he didn't want to start another fight about the same thing, he wanted to leave all that behind.

- And for what do I need to apologize now? - her expression was unchanged, as this somehow irritated him even more.

- Joining Cerberus for a start…

- No - her voice interrupted him before he even tried to say anything else and she noticed how angry this short answer made him - If I do so I'd feel like I'm apologizing for all the lives I saved, or the time I bought before the reapers showed up, you're welcome by the way, pity nobody used it to do anything.

- What about the Batarian colonies? - Kaidan felt her eyes pierce right through him like bullets and a cold shiver run down his , he heard a mocking laugh coming from her right before she started talking.

- Oh, you mean the personal favor Hackett asked me? - Kaidan noticed how the volume of her voice rose - The one that, even though Alliance didn't want anything to do with me, HE asked me to help?I got the doctor out alive all by myself, and when we got to the project base, everyone was indoctrinated and I had to fight for my life alone against the whole sedated for, how long was it now?2 days?Nobody would come for me, so I had to find a way to escape all by , that was such a mess.I only had like, one hour before it all exploded, and even though I knew it was useless, I tried to warn the how nobody mentions any of that, or how nobody asks why Hackett asked the help of someone working with yeah, my bad.

He stopped walking around and looked at her with a shocked face, watching as she ironically grinned at didn't know all the details, just what everybody else knew: Shepard exploded the whole batarian system while working for was the first time hearing about all heart tightened in his could see all the anger and pain in her eyes.

- Oh, I'm sorry, Major, you didn't know, did you? - she asked with a sarcastic voice - It's fine, nobody cares about the "details" as long as I get the job done - Shepard kept smiling coldly - And I always do, don't I?Now that we got that out of the way, it's your turn to apologize.

- For what? - Kaidan said air got heavier with every word she said, and even breathing was hard now.

- You could start by Horizon - Shepard's smile died and a cold expression took place.

- I couldn't join you…- Kaidan started but stopped right away seeing the way she looked at him.

- That was not the problem - Those words were almost put her right hand over her mouth for a second, in an attempt to hold her voice - I knew you wouldn't join me, I never expected you always were such a righteous man, that was part of what I loved about you.I knew you wouldn't leave Alliance to join Cerberus, even for me.

- Then what? - his words were almost a whisper

- For not trying to fucking listen to me! - She couldn't hold her voice anymore, Shepard felt her blood boiling, pushing herself away from the 's exactly why she didn't want to have this talk - Nobody listened, not the Alliance, not the council, even though I knew you wouldn't be with me, I knew you would listen, it would be enough if at least you you didn't - her voice cracked in her last words and her eyes started to get blurry.

- How was I supposed to? - Kaidan finally spoke with a loud and angry voice - I didn't even know if it really was you!You were dead for two fucking years, Olivia!Do you have any idea how it was for me?To see you working with Cerberus after those terrible two fucking years?

- Do you have any idea how hard I tried?I didn't have those two fucking years, have you ever thought about that? - she screamed at Kaidan getting a confused look from him. - You had two years to try and make sense of it all, to move on, but for me, it was just a couple of weeks since we…- her voice closed her eyes, taking a deep breath before continuing - since our last time together - tears ran through her cheeks, but she quickly brushed them off - So I tried so fucking hard to keep in mind that for everyone else it had been two years.I told myself so many times that I shouldn't expect anything from you, even if you moved on, it was fine, seeing you safe with my own two eyes would be I didn't have those two years to get over you or over us.I didn't even have time to mourn those lost two years, I never had the time to think about it. - her voice lost power and got quiet - I'm so fucking tired of it all, Kaidan.

Shepard turned her back at him, reaching both hands at the desk and leaning on it, trying hard to swallow all those felt his heart drop by the way she called his name, how long has it been since he heard it from her?She was so angry, so sad, and still, the way she said his name was so gentle.

He gave a step in her direction but stopped right was right, he didn't have any idea how it was for never thought about how it was for her to be brought back and thrown in all that he did was question her relationship with Cerberus from the first must have been so confused, scared much changed for everyone else after her death, how did she make sense o it all?Having to fight the collectors beside Cerberus while everyone else turned their backs on he turned his back on her.

- Liv - Kaidan broke the silence giving a couple of steps in her direction, trying to find the right words to say.

- I can't even remember the last time I slept, always thinking about the damn batarian system - he stopped when she started. - Or the damn suicide mission.I was…so thankful I was able to bring everyone back - he could hear the relief in her voice - Just to get locked up by the Alliance.I killed all those people and they didn't even make use of the time I got died for nothing.

Kaidan thought about what to say, but there was was the first time she ever talked about all that, so he decided to just whole conversation didn't work as planned, he couldn't make things right, and it was clear how it hurt straightened herself up, starting to walk nervously around.

- But then the reapers show up and I'm the hero again - she let a sarcastic laugh escape, throwing her hands in the air - Again, nobody listened to my warnings, but when everything went to hell, then they put me in charge!All those people that died while we escaped Earth - she made a pause, still walking side to side, covering her eyes for a second - How did I let it happen?I shouldn't have let Alliance arrest heavens, How could I let Anderson on Earth?

- Olivia, you can't put what happened to Earth on you - Kaidan finally could hear Shepard voice cracking while tears started to run down her face, she was losing her long has she been holding all that in? - And Anderson chose to stay and fight, he ordered you to go to the citadel and get help.

- Those good for nothing never helped anyone but themselves - she gave a fake felt uneasy, she was barely listening to him - They only decided to step up when they finally understood they couldn't escape this many died 'till they did so?Oh Lord, Mordin and Thane - Shepard felt her heart tightening more and more inside of her was the first time letting herself think about all ran her fingers through her hair - I didn't even have time to mourn died trying to fix the mess those idiots didn't need to should have never…- she stopped in the middle of the room, putting her hands on her hips, trying to hold her mind and heart were completely overwhelmed - And poor Thane - she shut her eyes tightly starting to violently sob - He died trying to protect the didn't deserve to be saved by deserved to die in had done enough.

- Shepard - Kaidan got close as she started to loudly cry - Liv - He felt his heart breaking, unable to find any word that could console only saw Shepard crying one time: after Ashley died, and right now, she seemed even more shaken.

Not being able to hold herself anymore, Shepard crouched down hugging her knees while violently those feelings, all that hurt she'd been carrying since she woke up in the Cerberus facility took over felt like a child, not being able to control herself anymore.

- I never asked to be brought back, Kaidan - she said in a small voice while sobbing - I'm tired of all of it, but I can't even let go 'cause I can't abandon you all in the middle of this I'm so tired of being…alive.

Kaidan shook his head, trying to hold himself was such a strong woman and seeing her break like that, hearing her saying all that was finally decided to reach out to her, kneeling in front of , he pulled her close, letting her head rest on his shoulders, feeling as his shirt got wet, putting his hands on her back and hair, soothing her just accepted it, clinging tightly to Kaidan's much she missed being close to him, to be hugged by a moment it was like things were going to be could just let go for the moment, she was safe.


After Shepard's breakdown, they couldn't do much just hold her until she started to calm down, then after a while, he sat with her on the couch, just holding her close for what seemed like was so exhausted from all the crying that ended up sleeping in Kaidan's woke up the next morning in her bed, knowing that Kaidan went to the trouble of carrying her there.

A couple of days have passed since that disastrous conversation, Shepard was by her desk that night, going through some files on her datapad, but failing in keep the didn't have the chance to talk after that day, but even if they did, what would she say to him?Things went way worse than she could have imagined, she planned on making clear that she didn't have anything to apologize for, but now that she could finally think clearly, she could see that her bad attitude was what ruined shouldn't have dumped all her problems at him like that or acted as she was trying to fix things, but her attitude hurt him, and he ended up hurting her as well.

She let a long sigh escape her the datapad on the table, resting her back on the chair, remembering that day over and over it was time to go and apologize to him, at least for that couldn't stay like that stayed there for some time, planning what to say, and how to explain herself.

Before she could finish planning her next step, she heard the door of her room open and then close right glanced behind her to find Kaidan with a nervous stood up immediately in surprise, turning to was just now thinking about every word she wanted to say, and even so, once she saw him, her mind went blank.

- Shepard - his voice cut through the heavy air - I hope you don't mind, I asked EDI to let me in.

- What? - she replied being pulled back to reality - Oh, no, it's fine.I was about to go looking for you actually.

- I was hoping we could talk - he said slowly.

- Again? - she shut her eyes - Sorry, that didn't come out right…

- I'm pretty sure you screaming at me for 20 minutes and then crying for another 3 hours doesn't count - he said with a small smile on his couldn't help but let a relieved laugh escape her lips.

- Kaidan, I…- Before she said anymore, she watched as Kaidan approached her and gently took her hands on his, lightly caressing her with his thumbs.

Shepard got startled for an instant, but gently smiled at remembered the SR-1 would do the same when he felt something was troubling her and she was trying to push him would approach her calmly and just lightly caress her hands or her was enough to calm her down and she couldn't keep him away anymore.

- I'm sorry - he said looking into her eyes - I didn't mean to start all that last time.I wanted to talk and let everything that happened since Horizon behind, but I let my temper get the best of me.I never tried to put my thoughts in order before talking to you, there was no way for things to go right before doing so, I see that now.I know I shouldn't ask, but give me one more chance, okay? - Shepard was taken by surprise, she didn't expect him to come and try again, but hell, she was thankful he did.

- I'm sorry, Kaidan - she chose to go first, moving her eyes to their hands, ashamed to look at him directly - I acted badly.I know you were trying to apologize, and although I still don't think I need to apologize about joining Cerberus, I should have made an effort to fix things.I'm sorry that I didn't and that I dumped all my problems on you.

- I missed hearing you call my name - he confessed with a smile - I'm sorry as well.I have been thinking a lot about what you were right, I never did try to listen to on Horizon or any moment after that, there's no way we could talk while I refused to you should always be able to talk with me about whatever has been bothering you, I'm sorry I pushed you so far you had to carry all that by yourself - Kaidan made a pause, just admiring her eyes for a second when she finally looked at him.

After that night, he took the time to think about all Shepard told him, and about what the rest of the crew he could think was about how wrong she was for not contacting him or how hurt he was by that, completely blinding himself for anything else.

- I was so overwhelmed with my own feelings that I never thought about yours or anything back now, what if they were using something against you to make you work for them?What if you needed help out?You could be trying to ask for my help and I didn't…- Kaidan felt one of her hands leaving his and reaching for his face, caressing it.

- Do you really think they could be keeping me prisoner or something? - she smiled at where she expected his mind to go, but somehow it was kind of cute that his mind would put her as a damsel in distress.

- No…For what I know, the last time someone kidnapped you, you blew the whole system they were in, it seems a pretty dangerous strategy.

Shepard widened her eyes and opened her mouth laughing, shocked about Kaidan's wasn't like him to say things like that, to joke about something so reached for his shoulder, hiding her face on it while she laughed, holding both of his hands once again.

- Oh my, Kaidan - she said still giggling - Not the kind of joke I expected from you.

- Too much? - he opened a wide smile once he heard her laugh - Joker said you would like it - Joker, of was just like him to make such a couldn't help but laugh himself, feeling the heavy air finally dissipating.

They just stayed like that for a while, until she finally lifted her face, smiling at much he missed that smile.

- But seriously, I'm relationship aside, we still went through so much together, I owed you a if I couldn't give it to you at Horizon because of Cerberus, I should have once we were back on Earth.

- I'm sorry too - she said caressing his hands - I wanted to be patient with you and let you take your time to trust me again, but I let it turn into a bitter feeling between us.I knew you would come to apologize but still decided to act like that.I was scared and pushed you away.I'm sorry.

Shepard looked at his hazel eyes, at his soft always looked at her with such adoring eyes, making her heart feel , with a few words, everything seemed right again.

- Wait, how did you know I would come to apologize? - he looked at her confused

- Hm?James told me?Later that day, after I left the shuttle bay, we met at the crew deck for a poker game with said you two talked and you wanted to apologize, and that I should "man up" and just accept 're doing a shity job teaching Joker how to play by the way - Shepard said all that with such a serious tone that Kaidan couldn't help but to laugh.

- So - his voice was low - Are we good?For real this time? - he waited for her answer, gently putting her hair behind her ear.

- Yes, we're good.

- And…what about us?I mean, we don't need to talk about it now, I just…

Before he could think anything else, Shepard opened a beautiful and wide smile, disturbing his thoughts for a felt both her hands grabbing his neck, pulling him close, locking their lips together in a slow and deep kiss, showing how she has been longing for widened his eyes, surprised, but soon relaxed, slowly kissing her hands moved to her hips, feeling as she wrapped her arms around him, pulling him even close as they fitted so perfectly in each other he got confused and frowned when she suddenly pulled away from him.

- Well, that's what I want to do about do you want, Kaidan? - she said in a whisper and he couldn't help but notice how worried her eyes seemed.

Shepard smiled as she felt him reaching for another kiss, more demanding this time, and was happy to comply when his tongue asked permission to explore her lifted her lightly, just enough so she would sit on the wrapped her legs on his hips, on a whim to keep him slowly unzipped her N7 jacket, taking it off and throwing some reason, her talk with James at the shuttle bay came back to his pulled away from her lips, hearing an upset whimper from her as he did.

- Just to be clear - he said with a husky voice - I'm the only one allowed to take your jacket off - Shepard frowned confused by his words.

- What is it about, Alenko? - He laughed, amused by her angry tone.

- At the shuttle bay - he said, lowering his lips to her neck, sucking on it, being sure to leave a mark while invading her shirt slowly with his rough fingers, caressing her skin, receiving a pleased moan as he did - I'm the only one who can take it all off, Shepard.I have no intention of sharing.

Shepard moved her head, giving more space for Kaidan's lips to explore her sensitive neck, feeling shivers down her spine as he did, holding his arm with one hand, slightly pressing her nails on him, and burying the other in his hair.

- Fuck, Kaidan, I just said that to shut James up - Shepard tightened her legs slightly around him, being able to feel his excitement through the clothes.

He pulled away again, this time to remove her shirt completely, she also reached out to help him with his smiled satisfied while biting her lower lip, throwing his shirt away, and removing his could he be so damn hot?She kissed his chest, making her way up until she reached his lips once more, but pulled away right after with a mischievous knew she was up to something.

- Well, Major - She started, lightly scratching her nails in the skin of his arms that were holding her once more - There's no need for anyone else to take it off…as long as you do a good job, don't you think?

- Damn witch - he growled getting a giggle out of him to call her that usually meant she did something right to provoke him - You're playing a dangerous game, Shepard - he took her out of the desk, lowering his hands, focusing on opening her pants.

- My favorite kind of game - She said with a low to her playful laugh, he kissed her once more, while slowly walking towards the bed, removing most of the inconvenient clothes on the way.

He carefully laid her on the bed, covering her body with his, kissing her again, a needy, deep, and greedy wrapped herself around him, keeping him as close as she could, running her fingers on his back, feeling as his muscles moved while his hands and lips slowly explored her let a content smile dance on his lips as he noticed that every little mark, every little scar was still there just as he remembered, in addition with a couple of new ones that he would happily burn into his memory.

- Found something to your liking, Major? - Shepard purred observing his pleased face.

- Everything, really - he whispered in her ear, earning a lustful smile in return - Though I hate to say something good about Cerberus, I'm happy to see they made sure to bring all of you back.

- Yeah, what would it do to my confidence if they let all these ugly scars out?I wouldn't be able to walk around like that - she ironically said hearing him chuckle.

- Don't say it like that, they are the proof of your every single time you scared the hell out of me by doing something unbelievable - he smiled as she slapped his shoulder laughing.

Shepard pushed his shoulders, switching their more on his lap, she could feel his bare excitement under her, and couldn't help when a satisfied smile showed on her hands slipped on her back, opening her bra, slowly removing the last piece of clothing between them without breaking eye buried his fingers in her thighs and let a content groan escape his lips as she removed it, being completely naked for him now.

She bent down and kissed his lips one more time, caressing his neck, chest, and abdomen gently with her lips followed, slowly, letting a wet trail of kisses, hearing little gasps from Kaidan's lips as she went down until she got at his hips.

Her fingers gently wrapped around his length, slowly stroking him first, making him close his eyes shut at the feeling, groaning as she covered his tip with her mouth, sucking, licking, but refusing to go slow pace she established was killing him, he could still hear the playful giggle that came from her witch, she was playing with him.

- Liv…

- Yes? - she coyly asked, pulling away, smiling amused by his expression.

- Please…

She chuckled, she loved messing with him, to see how far she could go before driving him not today, they would have time for that later, now she just wanted to enjoy their time together.

- Oh, Fuck.

Kaidan let a deep groan escape his mouth, feeling her warm lips completely covering him, setting a faster pace this time, moving up and down on fingers grabbed her golden hair tightly, trying to guide her to increase the allowed him to establish the pace, while her hand worked the extra length at the same speed.

She could hear his groans, his deep voice cursing her name and whispering profanities, she felt as if he was about to come and worked faster, taking him deeper, but before he could, he pulled her away from him, letting an upset cry out of his pulled her up, roughly kissing her, pushing her to lay her back on the bed as he did.

- Oh my, right when things were about to get fun - she lightly laughed when they parted.

- Don't worry - he deviously smiled, while making a trail of kisses to her breasts, cupping one on his hand, pinching its nipple between his fingers, and gently sucking on the other, getting a loud gasp from her and feeling as her body arched towards him when he released it - Now is when it gets really fun.

He sucked the other one as well, gently nibbling on it, doing it a couple more times, taking turns on both of buried her hand in his hair, inviting him to keep on going, while the other held the watched her face with a eyes were closed and her lips slightly parted, just enough for her moans to hand ran through her body slowly, only stopping when they reached her entrance.

She squirmed as one of his fingers slowly invaded her, moving in and out of pulled him so she could kiss him, feeling him moving inside moved another finger in, increasing the pace, causing her moans in his let her hand fall onto his shoulder, burying her nails in him, he still knew exactly how to touch her to drive her crazy.

- Fuck!Kaidan! - he smiled hearing her calling his name - Don't stop!

- I won't - he said as he sucked her neck strong enough to leave another mark - Don't worry - he softly whispered in her ear, nibbling on it.

He kept on kissing her lips, neck, breasts, nibbling on them, leaving his marks all around her body, feeling her moving her hips to match 't long until he felt her walls tense around his fingers.

Shepard closed her eyes tightly, biting her lower lip as she felt the tension building inside her core, she couldn't hold it clutched on him, sinking her finger into him, moaning his name as she reached her limit, feeling the wave of pleasure taking over waited for her to come down of her high before removing his fingers from her, hearing her whimper as he did.

He kissed her one more time.A deep and slow kiss as she calmed down, and for a second rested his forehead on hers, lost on her, now clouded, green couldn't help but smile at her, thinking about how long he waited to hold her again.

Kaidan positioned himself on her entrance, and with one strong thrust, buried himself inside of her, receiving a loud moan from her as he buried his fingers on one of her thighs and rested his face on her shoulder, enjoying the feeling of being engulfed by her, feeling as Shepard's nails mercilessly marked the skin of his back, taking a moment so she could get used to him.

After a few moments, he raised his head to admire the faces she made as he started to move inside her with slow and deep loved to watch her, to see the mess he and only he could make out of followed his movements, wrapping her legs around him, meeting every one of his trusts with her hips, incapable of keeping her voice down as they this time she would have been longing for him, but no scenarios her mind had given her could get even close to how she felt right now.

Kaidan increased his speed and his thrusts became more impatient, not being able to keep full control anymore, losing himself to the feeling, enjoying the noises Shepard made, but still doing what seemed like an impossible attempt of holding himself to not go too hard on her.

- Kaidan, please… - Shepard loudly called him, looking at him with her eyes half-closed, completely lost in her own pleasure - Faster…Harder…Fuck me harder!

"Damn witch", Kaidan thought hearing her begging for him, letting an angry groan out in response to her pleads that made any worries of being too rough on her disappear from his held strongly at her hip, moving with fast and almost violent thrusts, getting loud moans in return, feeling her walls starting to clench around knew they wouldn't last long.

Not long after that, he felt her walls tightly closing around him as she reached her climax once nails buried on his shoulder almost cutting his skin while her other hand held tightly to his hair, trying to pull him even closer as her body violently shook, crying his name.

As Shepard threw her head back, arching her body to him, he took the opportunity to kiss her neck, not slowing down, following her into the abyss right after, burying his face on her shoulders once more, strongly holding her as he finished himself inside of her.

They stayed like that for a moment as they calmed down, Kaidan tried not to let his weight fall on her as Shepard hands now gently caressed his dark hair and the deep marks her nails left on his left her, getting a whimper in response, and raised his face just so he could reach for a kiss, now calm and rested his forehead on hers again, smiling at her while looking into her eyes.

- So - he said with a cocky smile observing every inch of her face - Did I do a good job, Commander? - Shepard's laugh filled the room with his question, making him chuckle as he kissed her face.

- Well - she made a pause still giggling at him - I can't just give you a final answer with only one try - she smiled mischievously at him - We need to do it a few more times to try all the possibilities before I can give you a final answer, Major.

- You little witch - He laughed and kissed her one more time, feeling her hands gently holding his face and fondling his jawline.

- I missed you so much - Shepard said with an adoring smile on her face - I love you, Kaidan.

- I love you too, Liv - He gently grabbed one of her hands, lightly kissing her palm while smiling - Always did, always will.

He finally rolled his exhausted body to her side, covering them with the put a hand on her shoulder, pulling her closer to him, feeling her warmth as she rested her head on his chest, letting her arm rest on his abdomen with his other hand gently caressing it.

Kaidan smiled hearing a satisfied sigh coming from Shepard's lips as she kissed his chest, right above his heart, hearing her breathing slowing as her sleep took over 's where she should have been all this by his he would make sure she would never leave it gave one last kiss on the top of her head before allowing himself to slip into his dreams.