My dear Achilles, aristos achaian, best of the Myrmidons, greatest among men,
You drown me in your tears, and in truth I should be angry, I should rail against you, for I begged you to remain in peace and obscurity, to let Agamemnon fight his wars while you grow old with me. And equally I begged you to take up your shield and spear, to lead your men into battle, and in doing so, to save them. Both times you refused me. I would reject your apologies and your tears, but I could never refuse you.
Even in death, my heart breaks for you.
I see how you reproach yourself, yet even now, I cannot reproach you. You wish to have never met me, that I might grow old without you, yet I regret not a single day spent in your company. Given half a chance, I would choose you all over again, fifteen years by your side over a hundred years alone. I long for nothing but to bring you peace. I cannot know how your heart breaks; I could hardly bear to imagine living in a world with you gone. Selfishly, I am glad I will never have to know.
In the depths of your grief, please remember that you are more than the tragic mistakes swarming your soul. You are hope upon the battlefield, saving thousands of men from despair. You are both hearth and refuge for the women claimed as war prizes. You may have been the cause of my death, but you are also the stars in my night sky and the wind against my skin, the warmth in the summer and the rhythm of my heartbeat.
So persist, dear Achilles, my philtatos, most beloved, and throw not your life away in grief. One day I'll see you again, on the other side of the river. Until then, be well.
Love,
Patroclus
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Author's note: For DanceOnMyGraveLikeThereIsNoTomorrow on AO3, in response to their story The Gods Aren't fair and their notes. Hello from an Internet Stranger! I read in your author's notes that you're having a rough time. I don't know what you're dealing with, but I hope you make it through! It's not a perfect analogy, but like Achilles here, you're a star among constellations, touching countless lives in small and large ways, and the world would be just a bit dimmer without you! (Erm, maybe Achilles is a really bad analogy, given the whole killing Hector and then dying thing. Rise above Achilles.)
