Chapter 10
Yaz: You home?
Sonya: Yeah
Yaz: Are Mum and Dad home?
Sonya: No, they're at work. Where r u?
Yaz:I'm on my way home. I need to talk to you about something.
Sonya: Omg r u ok?
Yaz: Calm down! It's nothing bad. I just need to tell you something. Be right there.
Yaz looked up from her phone. "Okay, Sonya's home, but my mum and dad aren't. It's the perfect time."
"Okie dokie." The Doctor put the brakes on and the TARDIS landed. "Here we are, Park Hill Flats."
Yaz peeked out the door. They had landed in their usual spot, right in front of the building she lived in. She turned back to the Doctor. "Why do you always land here? I mean it makes sense now, but you landed in this exact spot when you first brought us back to Sheffield, and I hadn't even told you where I lived."
The Doctor shrugged. "Sometimes the TARDIS knows things I don't. I think she'd taken a shine to you by then. Didn't want to let you go." She smiled. "Good thing, right?"
Yaz grinned back. "Definitely." She took a deep breath. "Okay, I'd better go in. Wish me luck."
"Good luck. I'm leaving the TARDIS here, so you can get in if you need to get away. From your house, I mean. To be alone. I'm going to walk to Graham and Ryan's, so if you need me, you know where to find me."
Yaz nodded, looking down, and the Doctor gathered her in her arms.
"It'll be okay," she promised, kissing Yaz's cheek. "They're still gonna love you. And you know I love you with every fibre of my being."
"I love you too." Yaz kissed her, holding her close. "I don't think I'd be brave enough to do this if I didn't have you."
"Just think of all the terrifying situations you've already faced, and you've come through every one of them."
"Why does this seem scarier?" Yaz chuckled mirthlessly.
"You can do this." The Doctor kissed her again. "If it doesn't go well, come and get me. Or just call me. I can run from Graham's house to your flat in under two minutes."
"Okay. Shall I meet you back here later? Assuming everything does go well?"
"I was hoping I could come to yours when you're done talking to everyone. Could you WhatsApp me?"
"Sounds like a plan." Yaz gave the Doctor one last squeeze and kiss, and then she took a deep breath and stepped out of the TARDIS. Before her loomed the building that had been the only home she'd ever known, until the TARDIS became home.
It's just Sonya, she reminded herself, and made herself walk to the building. As she went in, she glanced back at the TARDIS and saw the Doctor still standing there, watching her. Yaz knew she was worried, so she gave her the most casual wave she could muster before the door closed behind her.
When she got up to her flat, she unlocked the door and went in, instantly hit by all the familiar smells of home. "It's me!" she called, walking towards the kitchen.
"Hey, it's about time," said Sonya, coming around the corner and hugging her. "You sure you're okay? How do you leave for weeks and come back without any cases?"
"I'm fine. How is everyone here?"
"Yasmin, is that you?"
The voice from the living room made Yaz's blood freeze. "Nani? I didn't know you would be here."
"Sonya took me to my doctor's appointment this afternoon and now I'm staying for tea. Where have you been?"
Yaz went into the living room and stooped to hug her Nani. "I've been travelling."
"Anywhere interesting?"
"Yeah, lots of interesting places."
"Well, sit down and tell me."
"First I need to talk to Sonya. Do you mind, Nani?"
"Fine, leave an old woman to sit alone. Do what you need to do."
"We'll be back in just a few minutes, Nani. Promise." She kissed her grandmother on the cheek and then seized her sister by the wrist, dragging her upstairs to her room. "You didn't tell me Nani was here!" she hissed.
"You didn't ask if Nani was here! You only asked about Mum and Dad!"
"Well I needed to talk to you alone!"
"What do you want me to do? I can't just kick her out." Sonya sighed, leaning against the door frame. "What do you need to tell me?"
Yaz bit her lip. "I'm getting married."
"Are you serious? I didn't know you even had a boyfriend!"
"I…don't."
Sonya frowned. "You're not marrying someone you've just met?"
"No, of course not. I've known her for quite a while now."
There was a silence as Sonya just stared at her, Yaz looking back hesitantly.
"That's why you've been so secretive," Sonya said finally. "You didn't…why didn't you tell me?"
"I didn't know how you would react. And Mum and Dad…Nani…"
"When we were in school and all the other kids were calling you that, you swore you weren't."
"I was trying not to be. I did try, Sonya. But I…I fell in love…"
"Yaz…" Sonya grabbed her and pulled her into a tight hug. "You should have just told me. I would never have minded. You are who you are. And it explains a lot."
Yaz struggled to hold back tears. "How could I tell you when I was refusing to admit it to myself?"
Sonya pulled back. "Has it really been that hard for you?"
Yaz nodded. "I wouldn't be coming out now if it weren't for the Doctor."
"The Doctor? That weird blonde woman you brought over here once?"
"Yeah. She's the one I'm going to marry. But I'm so scared, Sonya. What are Mum and Dad going to say? And how can we ever explain it to Nani? We can't expect her to understand at her age."
"Explain what, Yasmin Khan?" The stern voice came from the bottom of the stairs. Yaz stared at Sonya in horror.
"Nani, it's not what you think," Sonya tried.
"I know what I heard, Sonya. Your sister is getting married to a woman, and she doesn't think I'll understand because I'm old."
The two sisters just stared at each other, wide-eyed.
"Whatever happens, I'm on your side," Sonya whispered quickly. "I don't want you feeling like you did before, like you don't even want to live."
"I won't. Of course I want to live; I'm getting married." She gave a small smile. "I'm marrying someone who knows me really well and loves me for who I am."
"Sounds like she knows you better than we do."
Yaz shrugged. "I guess the person you marry is supposed to know you better than anyone."
"Yasmin, get down here and talk to me."
Pressing her lips together, Yaz steeled herself and went back downstairs, Sonya following close behind her. Umbreen was waiting in the hall.
"You're getting married and you didn't plan to tell your grandmother?" she demanded.
"I did plan to, but I wasn't sure how." Yaz hesitated. "I'm marrying a woman, Nani. And I love her very much, but I know it's not what you all want for me."
"You think we don't want you to be happy?"
Yaz raised her eyebrows. "I know you do, but I assumed you all wanted me to be happy with a husband."
"I want you to be with whoever makes you happy," Sonya reassured her. "Honestly, I'm just relieved you're not really married to the job."
Nani sighed. "You think because I'm an old woman I can't understand. I understand more than you think, Yasmin. I once married someone my mother didn't approve of, for love, and I didn't care what anyone thought."
Sonya frowned. "Your mother didn't approve of Granddad?"
"Oh no, she loved him. He was my second husband, after I was widowed on my wedding day." She looked to Yaz. "Perhaps it's time I told you the story of that watch I gave you."
Yaz's eyes widened as a thought occurred to her: Umbreen would recognize the Doctor. Perhaps she wouldn't remember Graham and Ryan that clearly, and certainly the precise features of Yaz, the strange young woman who came to her wedding, would have long since faded from her memory after that fateful, traumatic day in 1947. But there was no way she wouldn't remember the strange blonde "doctor" clad in rainbows who had performed her wedding ceremony.
"Sonya, can you let me talk to Nani in private for a minute?" she asked.
"What, now you want to talk to just her?" Sonya sputtered. "I thought I was your confidant in this family, at least today?"
"It's just for a minute. You can go decide how you're going to reorganize my room, since it's about to be yours."
"Oh yeah." Sonya lit up. "If you're getting married, you're definitely moving out! Now I get the big room!" She turned serious again. "I'll give you five minutes."
She hurried upstairs, and Yaz sat on the bottom few steps.
"I know about Prem," she said quietly. "I was there."
Umbreen stared at her. "What do you mean? How can you know about Prem?"
"Do you remember a woman named Yaz showing up with her three friends, Graham, Ryan, and the Doctor?"
Nani's eyes narrowed. "It was 1947."
"I know. But I also know you saw things that day that weren't of this world. Your mother called them demons, but they were actually aliens, Thijarians. The Doctor is also not of this world, but she's the most wonderful person I've ever met. She has a ship that can travel anywhere in space or time. I asked her to take me back, when you gave me the watch, so I could see what happened when you were young. I'm sorry. I know I shouldn't have."
"Yasmin, none of this makes sense."
"Did anything make sense that day? A man bringing people to kill his own brother?" Yaz shook her head. "I know I shouldn't have intruded. But I was there, the night before too. The Doctor officiated your wedding after the holy man who was supposed to do it was killed. Manish killed him." She felt a tear running down her cheek and wiped it away. "We could have saved Prem, and I wanted to, but the Doctor said we couldn't because then I would never be born, and she definitely wasn't having that." She smiled sadly. "When I came back, I kept asking you questions about how happy you were with Granddad, remember?"
"I remember." Umbreen looked at her carefully. "Where is this ship that can go anywhere in time and space?"
"Parked outside. It's disguised as an old police box though." She stood up and pushed Umbreen's wheelchair to the living room window. "Do you see it down there? The blue box?"
"How can that be a ship? Two people would hardly fit."
"It's bigger on the inside than it is on the outside."
"So when you've been travelling…"
"I've been travelling all over the universe with her." She looked down at Umbreen. "I love her so much, Nani. She's so determined to do the right thing, to help people any way she can. I've become a better person with her."
"And she loves you?"
Yaz gazed out at the TARDIS down below. "Sometimes I'm not sure why, but I know she does. She's proven a few times over that she would do anything for me." She looked back at her grandmother. "She sees me, for who I am. And she loves what she sees. I feel safe with her, like my heart is safe."
"Then it sounds like she is the person you should marry."
"Do you think Mum and Dad will say so too?"
"If they don't, they'll have me to deal with."
Yaz chuckled. "You sounded a little like the Doctor there."
"My question is, why did you think we would be upset she's a woman, but not that she's from another planet?"
Yaz shrugged. "I wasn't planning on bringing that up. I might not to anyone else."
"Will she be coming to tea tonight?"
"If Mum and Dad will have her. I need to talk to them when they get home."
"Well you will have my support, and your sister's. As you apparently know, I understand how it feels to love someone you're not 'supposed' to. When you love someone the way you love the Doctor, you have to be with them, and it doesn't matter what anyone else says."
Yaz grinned. "Thank you, Nani. It means the world to have you on my side."
"You're still my favourite granddaughter," Umbreen promised. "You have my spirit. You're strong-willed, ambitious. You love adventure, just like I always did."
"You have no idea," Yaz chuckled. "But I could tell you lots of stories."
Yaz didn't tell her the stories right away, since Sonya came back downstairs and refused to be left out of any further conversation, so instead Yaz shared the wedding plans they had so far and asked Sonya to be her maid of honour (Sonya agreed without hesitation and announced she was wearing blue). She told them a bit about the Doctor, the less alien parts. She found she missed her already, having grown so used to being with her almost all the time. She hoped she was having a nice time with Graham and Ryan.
When her parents got home, they were pleasantly surprised to see her, but it took no time at all for Najia to work out that there was news.
"Out with it, Yaz," she commanded. "I can tell you've already told Sonya and your Nani."
"Promise you won't freak out," Yaz said.
"You're not in trouble, are you?" asked Hakim.
"No," said Yaz. "I'm getting married."
"Married?" they both cried in unison.
"Who could you possibly be marrying? You haven't brought anyone home," Hakim asked, looking around frantically as if the scoundrel could be hiding anywhere.
"Actually, you have met her," Yaz said hesitantly.
"Her?" Hakim exclaimed in shock, but Najia just folded her arms.
"It's the Doctor, isn't it?" she said.
Yaz nodded.
Najia sighed. "Why didn't you just tell me when I asked?"
"We weren't seeing each other yet then. We hadn't even known each other that long."
"I could sense it between you though. You felt something for her."
Yaz shrugged. "I did, but I was fighting it." She blinked back tears. "I wanted to be your perfect daughter."
"So you're saying you're a lesbian?" said Hakim, finally cottoning on.
"Yes." Yaz looked down. "I'm sorry."
"Bheti." Umbreen wheeled up beside her and took her hand. "You have nothing to be sorry for. We don't get to choose who we love. Just be grateful you found someone you love that much."
"Yaz, don't apologize. We love you no matter what," Najia said quietly, pulling Yaz into her arms.
"Of course we do," Hakim agreed, hugging her from the other side. "Bring the Doctor over here for tea. Let us get to know her."
Yaz stepped back, wiping a tear away. "She just went down the street to see some friends of ours. I'll tell her to come over so you can all meet her properly."
"If she loves you, then we will love her," Najia promised. "Though I suppose she's not Muslim?"
Yaz shook her head. "I don't think she'll be converting, either."
"Will there be children?"
"Mum! We haven't even talked about it, but I really don't think so."
"You're not going to make me an aunt?" Sonya complained. "I really wanted to be an aunt."
"Najia, Sonya, leave her alone," Umbreen said patiently. "Just be happy for her. She found someone to marry. Everything else will fall into place as it should." She smiled up at Yaz. "I just want to make sure it's a good wedding."
"It will be," Yaz promised. "Small, but good."
"You come from a Pakistani family and you want a small wedding?" Sonya said dryly.
"Just get her over here so we can all talk to her," Najia said.
"Yes, I'll cook," Hakim volunteered.
"I'll call her," Yaz said, heading back up to her room.
She stood surrounded by familiar things that belonged to another life, another version of herself, and dialled the Doctor.
"Yaz!" the Doctor said breathlessly, answering after the first ring. "I was just talking about you! How is it going?"
"Better than I expected," she admitted. "My whole family's here, even my Nani, and they want you to come over for tea so they can meet you properly."
"Tea at Yaz's, at long last?" the Doctor gasped delightedly. "I'll be right there! But wait…"
"Yes?"
"Your Nani. I met her in 1947. Do you think she'll recognize me?"
"A blonde woman wearing rainbows who officiated her first wedding? Yes, I think she could hardly forget you. I had no choice but to tell her everything, but only her. Everyone else still thinks you're human. So…we'll see how long that lasts."
"You don't think I can pass for human?"
Yaz paused. "I think you can for a while."
"I will be so normal at tea, you won't even recognize me."
Yaz raised her eyebrows. "I do want my fiancée, not some stranger. Anyway, get over here! I kind of miss you already."
"I miss you too. Graham and Ryan send you their love. I'll be there in five mins!"
Yaz smiled as she hung up and put the phone back into her pocket. She thought she heard a little crinkle of paper and realized there was a note in her pocket. Unfolding it, she broke into an even bigger smile.
My Yaz -
Whatever happens today, you are still my most favourite person in the whole universe, and I love you more than anything! Can't wait to have you in my arms again tonight!
- Doctor
She had drawn several little red hearts at the bottom of the note. She must have slipped it into Yaz's pocket when they were hugging goodbye, knowing she was nervous and wanting her to have a little encouraging surprise.
Her heart swelling, Yaz carefully folded the note and put it back into her pocket. Her first love note from the Doctor. She was definitely keeping this forever. Deciding to repay her in kind, she walked to her desk and dug out a blue sticky note, scrawling a quick love note of her own:
My Doctor,
I don't think I ever properly thanked you for showing me the universe, so thank you. I still think you're the best thing in it.
Love you,
Yaz
She added a few hearts of her own and tucked it into her pocket to slip the Doctor later. Then she headed back downstairs.
"The Doctor says she's on her way—" she started, but then she heard a knock at the door. "Oh, that must be her!"
She ran down the hall to open the door. The Doctor stood, smiling anxiously, a crystal dish in her hands.
"Hello!" she said. "I brought dessert! For the tea! I made Lab-e-Shireen, custard and fruit!"
Yaz kissed the Doctor's cheek and took the dish from her, peering through the lid. "You know how to make that?"
"Of course I do!" She lowered her voice. "Graham said I shouldn't come empty-handed if I want to make a good impression."
"You're nervous, aren't you?"
"Of course I am! I have to convince your parents I'm good enough for their daughter!"
"You'll be fine," Yaz whispered, turning to lead her towards the kitchen and hoping she really had made the dessert correctly. She'd spent her share of time in the TARDIS kitchen with the Doctor. Some of the dishes the Doctor cooked turned out impressively well. Others were more like science experiments that went horribly awry. She hoped for the Doctor's sake that this would fall into the first category, but they'd never made Pakistani desserts together before, so she wasn't so sure.
"Everyone, this is the Doctor," Yaz said to her family, although all of them had already met the Doctor at some point. "Doctor, this is my Mum and Dad, my sister Sonya, and my Nani."
"I'm so pleased to finally be here for tea," the Doctor said, grinning widely. "And I suppose I should congratulate all of you, except for Sonya."
"What?" Sonya frowned.
"All of you except for Sonya played a role in creating the incredible Yasmin Khan," the Doctor continued, beaming at each of them in turn. "I'm sure you're all chuffed! Plus you all look at least a little bit like Yaz, so that's exciting. That bit includes you, Sonya."
Great impression of a normal human, Doctor. Yaz smiled sheepishly. "The Doctor brought a dessert she made," she said. "Lab-e-Shireen."
"Where did you learn how to make this?" Najia asked, taking the dish from Yaz.
"Pakistan," the Doctor said proudly. "I travel a lot."
"You've been to Pakistan?" Hakim asked in surprise.
"Oh yes, a few times. I've been loads of places."
"Yaz, do you travel with the Doctor?" Najia asked.
"Yes," Yaz admitted. "We were just travelling as friends, originally. Then we fell in love, so we decided to get married."
Najia scrutinized the Doctor. "What kind of doctor are you?"
"Well, I'm…a scientist."
"What kind of scientist?"
"Astrophysicist." Wow, apparently she'd anticipated this line of questioning.
"Do you work for the University?"
"I'm freelance at the moment," the Doctor said. "But don't worry, I'm independently wealthy."
Sonya's eyes widened. "And you want to marry Yaz?"
"Who wouldn't?" said the Doctor without a hint of irony. Yaz couldn't help smiling.
When they all sat down to eat, the questioning continued, with the Doctor easily making herself sound like the sort of wealthy professional anyone would want their daughter married to.
"Where do you two plan to live after you're married?" Hakim asked.
"We're probably just going to travel," Yaz said. "We love travelling. We'll visit loads though, I promise."
"We've talked about possibly getting a flat here in Sheffield for when we're between trips," the Doctor said tentatively, glancing at Yaz. "But we haven't decided for certain yet."
"Oh, that would be wonderful!" said Umbreen. "We could see more of our Yasmin, and get to know you too, Doctor." She gave the Doctor a meaningful look.
"And where will the wedding be held?" Najia asked. "I assume it won't be a Muslim wedding."
"It won't be a religious ceremony at all," Yaz insisted. "We want to do something simple at the Botanical Gardens. A nice outdoor wedding."
"Our friend Graham has agreed to officiate," the Doctor said excitedly. "Najia, you met him."
"At the hotel," Najia acknowledged. "Yaz, you still haven't told me how you know all these people."
Yaz thought about it. "I met them on the job," she said. "I can't really give too much information."
"You make friends working as a copper?" Sonya questioned dubiously.
"Yes, Sonya. Anyway, we don't want a big weeklong event, just something simple with elements from both of our cultures."
"You can't skip the Mayun," insisted Umbreen. "Or the mehndi ceremony!"
"Is that the one where you do the henna tattoos?" the Doctor asked excitedly. She grinned at Yaz. "I definitely want to do that."
"Then we will," Umbreen insisted. "And I can do much better designs than my mother did."
"I can't wait!" enthused the Doctor, and Yaz couldn't help smiling too.
"So are you from Sheffield?" Najia asked. "You sound like you're from Yorkshire."
"I am, but a different part of Yorkshire. I'm from…West Yorkshire. A small mining village. You probably won't have heard of it."
"Are your family still there?"
"No." The Doctor looked around the table, her smile fading. "I don't have any family left. It's just me, and now Yaz."
Everyone was quiet for a moment, no doubt contemplating what it would be like to prepare for a wedding with no family. It was what Yaz had been afraid she would have to do, if her family didn't support her.
"Then we will be your family," said Umbreen firmly.
"Yeah, of course we will," Sonya agreed. Yaz's parents both murmured their agreement, and the Doctor's grin returned, only this time she looked like her hearts would burst.
"Yasmin Khan's family," she said proudly. "I can't think of any family I'd rather join." She reached for Yaz's hand under the table and squeezed it. Yaz squeezed back.
To everyone's surprise and delight (and Yaz's great relief), the Lab-e-Shireen the Doctor made was absolutely perfect. When everyone was finished eating and the table had been cleared, Sonya left to take Umbreen home, and they were alone with Yaz's parents. The Doctor made eye contact with Yaz, who hung back while the Doctor followed her parents into the living room.
"Yaz's mum and dad," the Doctor began respectfully as she sat in a chair while the Khans took the sofa. "I meant what I said. You two made the most amazing human being I know, and I love her more than I can say."
"Please," said Najia, "call us by our names. I'm Najia, and my husband is Hakim."
The Doctor nodded seriously. "Najia, Hakim, I have already asked Yaz to marry me, and she is the only person whose consent I need, but I would feel wrong if I didn't ask for the blessing of the two people who brought her into this universe. I know for many reasons I'm not the person you imagined your daughter marrying, but she believes I am the person who would make her happiest, so I hope you can give us your full support going forwards."
Yaz held her breath. Hakim reached for Najia's hand.
"We want Yaz to be happy," he said quietly. "If she says you make her happy, then you have my blessing."
"Mine as well," said Najia. "Yaz is a very intelligent woman, and I trust her to make her own decisions. If she says you're the best choice for her, then we will gladly celebrate your union and welcome you into our family."
The Doctor broke into a relieved smile, and Yaz, blinking back tears, rushed into the living room and hugged her parents.
"Thank you," she whispered.
"Yaz, I just wish you'd felt comfortable telling me about the Doctor from the beginning," Najia said.
"I didn't know. I've been struggling with this for years. I just want you to be proud of me."
"We always are, Yaz," Hakim promised.
"I told you they'd love you no matter what," the Doctor said softly, appearing at Yaz's side. "Thank you for accepting me into your family, and trusting me with your daughter," she told the Khans, slipping her arm around Yaz's shoulders.
"I trust Yaz's judgment," Najia said simply, although Yaz could tell she was still sizing the Doctor up.
The Doctor looked at Yaz. "You know, I've never seen your room."
"I can take you up there to look around. I guess I should start packing so Sonya can move in." She took the Doctor's hand and led her upstairs to her bedroom. The Doctor looked around, fascinated by every detail.
"So neat and orderly," she said. "Oh, Yaz! Your police commendations!" The Doctor gently touched a frame, then turned around and crossed the room to the window. "So this was your view growing up."
"Yeah, a car park." Yaz came up behind the Doctor and wrapped her arms around her waist, resting her chin on her shoulder. "You've given me much more exciting views."
"This is exciting. You get to watch everyone come and go."
"I did used to like doing that, but I was always jealous of kids who had their own gardens to play in."
"Is that what you'd rather have? A little cottage with a garden?"
"I'd rather have our new bedroom on the TARDIS."
"Well, we'll have that no matter what. But you'll want to spend time in Sheffield with your family, and you won't be staying here anymore. We need our own place for when we visit."
"Could you do that? Domestic life, even on occasion? You don't like to stay in one place too long."
"I stayed in one place for twenty-four years straight when I knew it was my last night with River. Didn't even get into any trouble. I could do the same for you, easily." She turned to look in Yaz's eyes. "You only have so many years with your family. If I manage to lengthen your life span, you will see them all age and die while you live on, and the years without them will be very, very long. I don't want you to regret not spending enough time with them."
"I'll think about it."
When they went back downstairs, Sonya was just returning from taking Umbreen home.
"Yaz, aren't you staying here tonight?" Najia asked.
"No," Yaz said, a little uncomfortably. "I'm leaving with the Doctor. But we'll be back. There's loads to plan, even for a small ceremony."
"Once we've got you married off, it'll be time to find a husband for me," said Sonya. "Are you still friends with Ryan?"
"Ryan? He's going to be my best man!" the Doctor said excitedly.
Sonya lit up. "So I'll see him at the wedding!"
"You don't need to be in such a rush to get married," Yaz told her. "You're young. Just enjoy having the bigger bedroom for a while."
"I'm only a year and a half younger than you," Sonya said with a scowl.
And that was when it really hit Yaz. Yes, Sonya was supposed to be only a year and a half younger than her, but she wasn't anymore. The gap was widening. Perhaps the Doctor would succeed at gifting her with more lifetimes, but she would only get one life with her family. This was the curse the Doctor lived with. She looked at the Doctor, who met her eyes knowingly.
"It's a nice night," the Doctor said. "Why don't we go for a walk?"
Yaz smiled and nodded. Bidding goodbye to her family, she went downstairs with the Doctor, hand in hand, and they began strolling along the edge of the grounds, the sky darkening above them.
"I'm glad your family took your coming out so well," the Doctor said after a few minutes of silence. "And that I was able to get your parents' blessing. I was really nervous about that."
Yaz let out her breath. "You just have one of those faces that makes people want to trust you."
The Doctor looked at her. "I know this is a lot. If you're not sure—"
"I'm sure. Doctor, I've never been more sure of anything. I'm going to marry you, and it's going to be the best and most brilliant thing I've ever done."
"Oh. Okay. Good."
"The hard part is figuring out what we do after the wedding. I think you're right, that we need a place of our own in Sheffield. Because we will need to visit, and to be able to have people over. What if Sonya does get married – not to Ryan, but to someone – and she has kids of her own? I'll have little nieces and nephews, and I'll want to watch them grow up."
The Doctor straightened up as if suddenly very excited. "I'd be their aunt too!"
Yaz laughed. "Yes, you would. And we don't want to miss that. It's just a struggle, finding the right balance. Space life and regular life. Except space life is regular life to me now. You are my home." She looked up at the enormous complex that had been her home for so long. "I'd leave all this behind without a second thought if it weren't for them. I love my family."
"Of course you do, and that's why I want to make sure you get enough time with them. You heard what they said. They're my family now too!"
Yaz smiled. "So what have Graham and Ryan been doing?"
"Well, Graham's enjoying retirement, and Ryan's working for an engineering company. They're working on some innovative project to remove plastic from the ocean. He's very excited about it."
"That's wonderful!"
"Yes. And Graham is honoured to officiate for us. He also told me a bit about his wedding with Grace, some traditional vows they used that I really liked, and I think we should use them."
"What are weddings like on Gallifrey?"
"Lots of pomp and circumstance. I don't think we want anything much like that, but there is one custom that would fit in here. As you pointed out at your Nani's wedding, Hindus do it."
"Tying the hands together?"
The Doctor nodded. "But I'll find something better to use than rope. I think I've got some rainbow ribbon somewhere…that would be fitting, wouldn't it? Since here rainbows symbolize people like us?"
"Yeah." Yaz looked down. "I guess I still haven't said it out loud yet."
"Said what?"
Yaz looked back up at the Doctor. "I'm gay."
The Doctor grinned. "Me too! Right now. I've really got to learn more about regeneration. I used to have a friend, Romana, who could pick exactly what she wanted to look like when she regenerated. I never learned how to do that, but I think I need to. At least, I need to learn how to keep regenerating as a woman. I've got to stay attractive to my wife."
"You're the first Time Lord! How did your friend know something you didn't?"
"Apparently, other Time Lords knew a lot of things I didn't, including about me," she said darkly. She stopped walking for a moment. "Wait, that was a big deal for you to say, wasn't it? That you're gay?"
"It kind of was."
"Oh, Yaz. Sometimes I forget what it's like for humans in your time. I'm so proud of you." She kissed her. "I'm glad you're accepting who you are, because who you are is perfect to me."
Yaz hugged her close. "I'm not sure I ever would have got here without you."
"Ah, well, staying in the closet isn't so hard, until you fall in love." She rubbed Yaz's back. "I love you. Will you marry me?" she mumbled thoughtfully.
"What?" Yaz pulled back, looking at her in confusion. "Didn't we already have that conversation?"
"No, it says it on the building."
Yaz turned around to see the familiar glow of the white neon sign on one of the bridges connecting two buildings. It read, as it always had, I LOVE YOU WILL U MARRY ME?
"Oh." She laughed. "That used to be graffiti. Some bloke painted that up there in the eighties I think, to propose to his girlfriend. Then it was just there forever and it became a sort of landmark. The paint was peeling off, so the new building owners had a neon sign made that looks just like the original handwriting." She looked back at the Doctor, frowning. "I think I heard they never got married though."
"Oh, well that's disappointing." The Doctor took both of Yaz's hands. "We'll do better than they did."
"Of course we will." Yaz pulled the Doctor in for another kiss, feeling her arms readily wrap around her, and deftly slipped the little love note she'd written out of her own pocket and into the Doctor's. "The answer is yes."
"To what?"
"You said 'will you marry me?' I will!"
"Well I already knew that!"
"You asked again, and I answered again! It's still yes!" Yaz turned back in the direction the TARDIS was parked, pulling the Doctor with her. "Come on. We've got loads to do, and I'm exhausted after today. I think I need a hot bath in our new tub."
The Doctor hurried to keep pace with her. "Can I come too? In the bath?"
"Don't be daft, of course you can! You did make the tub for two people." She laughed and kissed the Doctor's cheek. "I love you."
"I love you," said the Doctor, so quietly Yaz could barely hear her.
"You all right?"
"I'm better than that. I just…can't believe I found you. That's all." She squeezed Yaz's hand. "Our bathtub is waiting. Let's get a shift on!"
