Chapter 12
The TARDIS had barely landed before Yaz was out the doors, bursting with excitement. She was dressed in a black swimsuit and white sarong with sunglasses and sandals, her curls loose around her, a basket of beach supplies clutched in her hand.
She broke into a grin as she took in their surroundings. For starters, it really was a beach. That wasn't always strictly guaranteed when you travelled with the Doctor. It was pleasantly hot, the kind of weather that made you just want to lie around and feel lucky to be alive. Two suns shone brightly in the clear blue sky. The sand was almost white and would no doubt be blinding to look at if she took her sunglasses off. The waves that gently crashed to shore were a lovely turquoise, and the great expanse of sea seemed to stretch on unbroken forever. Various tropical shrubbery and trees grew along the coast, but there was a nice open space in front of them where they would be able to play in the waves all they wanted.
"I hope you brought that extra-strong sun cream!" she called to the Doctor, who was just emerging from the TARDIS loaded down with a bag and blanket, wearing a blue swimming vest and shorts with rainbow flip-flops and her leopard sunglasses.
"I've got it!" the Doctor promised, depositing everything on the sand. "Let me get this blanket set up and I can put some on you."
Yaz looked around and spotted a little A-frame cottage behind them, nestled amongst the trees. The sloped roof was covered in solar panels, which she supposed was the only way to get electricity in such a remote location.
"Is that our cottage?" she asked excitedly. "Can I go in and look around?"
"One min." The Doctor dug around in her bag and pulled out her sonic, holding it out to Yaz.
"Thank you!" Yaz took the sonic and went skipping off to the cabin's door. She pointed the sonic at the doorknob like a pro and smiled when she heard the click of the lock, letting herself in to check out their new digs. "Cosy" was definitely the word for it. There was a tiny front porch with a couple of chairs and a small table, and through the front door was a small living area with two love seats and a coffee table on one side and a dining table with two chairs on the other. Beyond that was a wooden spiral staircase leading up, and a bathroom. At the back of the house was a little kitchen (which Yaz noticed the Doctor had fully stocked) and a door going out the other side, where she could see more trees and, in the distance, water again. She went up the spiral staircase and found herself under the steeply sloping roof. A double bed was nestled in one gable with a round window above it, while the other gable had a larger window with a small desk and chair underneath. Peering out this window, she could see the Doctor down at the beach, spreading out their blanket and finding rocks to weigh the corners down with.
Yaz went back to the bed and flopped down on it, heaving a blissful sigh. The bed was nice and soft, which was good, because she planned on spending a lot of time here. She couldn't help smiling as she thought of the previous night, when they had made love over and over while surrounded by fragrant flowers. Sex for her was like discovering a whole new world, one filled with magic. A world she and the Doctor had all to themselves. Her body felt so much more alive now. Loved. Cherished. With my body, I thee worship. She had loved the Doctor's request to use that vow in their hodgepodge ceremony, as it felt like exactly what they were both doing.
She sat up again and realized the round window behind the bed had a light green piece of paper lodged in it, folded in half with YAZ written on it in the Doctor's handwriting. Remembering that the Doctor had mentioned coming out here a few days ago to make sure everything was ready, Yaz grabbed for the paper and unfolded it.
My Yaz,
As I'm writing this, it's still a few days before our wedding. There's loads to do. I've got to order the flowers, you have a spa day with Sonya planned, and your wonderful Nani is going to paint both our hands with beautiful mehndi designs! I can't wait!
But right now I'm here, at our honeymoon spot, making sure everything is set for our arrival. We'll be here later today, even though I'm going to be on Earth with you for a few days before I bring you here. You can do things like that when you've got a time machine!
It's still a bit hard to believe we're really doing this. I didn't think I had it in me to love someone like this again. I was a wrung-out mess before you found me, Yaz, but I've found hope and renewal in you. It's amazing how everything changed as soon as I allowed myself to love you. It was like opening the flood gates. It consumes me now; it's all that really matters. It terrifies me really, but I would do absolutely anything to defend this love, to defend you. Which is why I am getting ready to marry you, and if you're reading this now, that means you really did go through with it. Half of me still doesn't quite believe you will! But you must have done, so I'm all yours now. How lucky am I?
I've never known anyone with a heart as pure as yours, Yaz, not in all my thousands of years spent travelling through time and space. I'm really not at all convinced I deserve you, but I do know I can love you the way you deserve to be loved, and maybe that's enough. I can promise to give you the life of adventure you crave and to be your safe haven, always.
Anyway, I'm sure you'd like to get on with your honeymoon, our honeymoon, so I'd better stop writing. I just want to say thank you, for loving me, for always keeping me warm in this cold universe, for being my light in the darkness. I love you so, my Yaz, and I just hope I can bring you as much joy as you've brought me.
See you soon!
love, Doctor
Blinking back tears, Yaz tucked the note into her straw bag. She decided to write a letter back, but she didn't have any paper. Looking around, she noticed a green pad of paper sitting on the desk at the opposite side of the room, a pen on top. That must have been what the Doctor had used. Yaz hurried over and picked up the pen, looking out the window again for inspiration. The Doctor had finished setting up the blanket and was sitting there looking around, slightly lost. Yaz decided she'd better make this quick.
My Doctor,
Yes, I followed through with the wedding! Did you really think I wouldn't? I'm watching you down at the beach now, and you're starting to look lonely, so I'd better hurry down there. I was just checking out our new bed, where I'm sure we'll get lots of good…sleep. After we've had a good workout in it, that is.
She smiled, knowing how the Doctor would blush when she read that.
I am so thrilled to begin this new adventure with you, the adventure of marriage, of joining two very different lives together and creating one common future. I love you so, my beautiful Doctor, and you have made me feel more loved than I ever dreamed I would. My life is full – it's more than full, it's exploding with wonder, all because of you.
Now it's time to kick off the honeymoon! I'll be right out!
love,
your Yaz
She folded the paper and hid it inside the Doctor's pillowcase for her to find later, then scurried down the spiral staircase and back outside.
The Doctor was standing up now, looking worriedly in the direction of the cabin. She broke into a smile when she saw Yaz gleefully running towards her.
"Well you took long enough looking around!" she said. "I was thinking about coming in to make sure nothing had happened to you!"
"I was just having a proper look round!" Yaz kicked her sandals off and flopped down on the blanket, tucking the sonic back into the Doctor's bag. "Did you find the sun cream?"
"Yes, but I had no one to put it on. Or to put it on me."
Yaz sat up. "Here, I'll put it on you."
"You first. Humans are more prone to sun damage. I grew up on a planet with two suns, so I'm used to it, but I won't have you getting sunburnt."
"All right." Smiling, Yaz pulled her hair to one side to give the Doctor access, smiling as gentle hands began massaging the cream onto her back, her neck, her shoulders.
"So are we the only ones on this island? It seems small," Yaz remarked as the Doctor made her way down her arms with the cream.
"Yes. Private island, and no other in sight. It's all ours for now!" The Doctor moved around in front of Yaz and rubbed the cream onto her chest, her collarbones.
"How long will we be here?"
"Well, that's somewhat up to us. Close your eyes." Yaz did, and the Doctor removed her sunglasses and rubbed cream onto her face. "How long will our mehndi last?"
"A few weeks."
"How about we stay until the mehndi's gone, then move on to our next adventure?" She gently slipped Yaz's sunglasses back onto her face and then moved on to her legs, making her way all the way up each thigh. Yaz couldn't help giggling. She loved the Doctor touching her like this, loved watching the way she bit her lip as she realized she was getting close to more intimate spots.
"I love having your hands on me," she said in a low voice.
The Doctor gazed at her through the leopard sunglasses, her hands still on Yaz's thigh. "I love having my hands on you. You're very…very soft."
"I have a good skin care routine." Yaz smiled. "I should put some cream on you."
"Oh. Yes." The Doctor removed her hands from Yaz and handed over the tube of sun cream. Yaz squeezed some out and began rubbing it on the Doctor's legs, slowly and sensually. She watched the Doctor bite her lip, struggling for self-control.
"I think this is the most skin I've ever seen you show outside," the Doctor suddenly remarked. "Usually you're dressed in layers. It's a bit different to see you sitting outside with your arms and legs bare, looking so carefree."
"Do you like it?"
"Very much."
"You did say it was a private island. I'm usually quite modest, but if it's just us…" She squirted more cream on her hands and took one of the Doctor's arms, rubbing cream on both sides. "It's how I was brought up, to be modest around boys. Sonya never took it as seriously as I did, but I never really liked them looking at me. Boys, that is." She looked down. "But then, Sonya was looking right back, and I wasn't."
The Doctor studied her. "I'm sorry I didn't see right away how brave it was for you to come out as gay. It never even occurred to me, really."
"It's okay." She moved to the Doctor's other arm. "I imagine coming out isn't really a thing on a planet where people can randomly change genders."
"No. Who you're attracted to is who you're attracted to. There isn't a name for it, any more than there's a name for people who like chocolate ice cream best. It's not something that usually changes if you change genders, although it can change at least a little bit with any regeneration. I lived several lives in a row without really being attracted to anyone, and then suddenly I was attracted to women again."
Yaz frowned. "But does that mean someday you might not be attracted to me?"
"No, Yaz. I'm in love with you. My soul is bonded to your soul now. As long as you are here, that will never change. Lots of things might change about me, but deep inside I'll still be me, and I'll still be in love with you. Because the part of me that loves you is the part that doesn't change no matter how many times I regenerate."
Yaz's heart swelled, and she couldn't resist giving the Doctor a kiss before rubbing some cream on her collarbones. "I can't imagine ever not loving you, either."
"I hope you always will, my beautiful Yaz."
"So for Time Lords, does it even matter if you have a man's body or a woman's? Is it just like clothes you can change?" She gently removed the Doctor's sunglasses and carefully rubbed cream onto her face, meeting her hazel eyes.
"No. It's a bigger deal than that, but not as big of a deal as it might be for you. Every cell in your body rewrites, so if you get a female body, you get a female brain to go with it, assuming all goes well. I was a man before, and I am a woman now. It doesn't feel the same. But most of what makes me me isn't really related to my gender, so it was sort of a big deal and not a big deal at the same time."
"I guess I can see that." Yaz finished rubbing in the cream and planted a little kiss on the end of the Doctor's nose. "Lie down. I'll do your back."
The Doctor lay down on the blanket, and Yaz straddled her bum, squeezing cream onto her shoulder blades and rubbing it in very slowly and thoroughly.
"Some Time Lords I knew never changed gender, no matter how many times they regenerated," the Doctor said thoughtfully. "Some really didn't want to. Some only changed maybe once or twice and absolutely hated it. Others switched back and forth like it was nothing. So we do have our preferences, even though we are a lot different from humans. But I will say, a lot of the Time Lords I knew who had been both men and women liked being women better. They didn't necessarily dislike being male, they just…enjoyed the upgrade."
"Is it an upgrade? Being a woman?" Yaz quite liked that idea.
"In some ways, yes. Your ego doesn't get in the way so much. I had a really big ego in some of my previous regenerations. And I feel more in control of my emotions now. Sometimes before, something would make me angry, and the anger would sort of take over. I'd go into an absolute rage sometimes, even throwing things occasionally. Now I get angry just as often, but I almost always feel like I'm still in control. I don't fly off the handle like before."
"I haven't ever seen you throw things."
"I did once, but you weren't there. And it was just one thing. Hologram message the Master left me."
"I'd probably throw that too." Setting the cream aside, Yaz leaned down and kissed the side of the Doctor's head. "So you like it? Your female body?"
"Yes, it's my favourite yet! Especially now that you've…made it come alive."
Grinning, Yaz rolled off of the Doctor, lying on her back next to her. "You've made mine come alive too, and I love it. I can't believe I was considering staying celibate indefinitely."
The Doctor turned onto her side so she could look at her. "I never even thought about it until you wanted to, but now…it's the most beautiful thing I've ever done."
"Me too." Yaz put her hand on the side of the Doctor's face and kissed her tenderly. She felt the Doctor's hand move up her arm and then down her side, feeling her shape. After a minute, she pulled back. "If we're going to play in the sand, we'd better do it now, because if we carry on like this, I'm going to undress you."
"Right. Yes." The Doctor sat up reluctantly.
"Oh, come on. We were at it for hours last night."
"I know, but the more we do it, the more I want to do it," the Doctor mumbled, and Yaz chuckled.
"Yeah, me too. But we're beach ready now, so let's at least enjoy this for a few hours before we go in and try our new bed out?"
The Doctor nodded, grinning. "I'm ace at building sandcastles!"
"That sounds fun! Or I could bury you in the sand." Yaz picked up a handful of sand and let it run through her fingers. "The sand is nice and warm. It might be relaxing."
"Okay. You do me, and then I'll do you!"
Yaz struggled to hold back laughter at the Doctor's completely innocent comment. She kicked off her sandals and walked out onto the sand, looking for a good spot. The Doctor followed her, flopping down when she found a spot she liked. Yaz knelt beside her and began shovelling sand over her, packing it down.
"This is actually quite relaxing," said the Doctor. "It's like taking a warm bath, only with sand instead of water. And without the ability to move. It's a good thing I trust you."
"You're going to need a bath after this," Yaz chuckled. "But don't worry, I will gladly bathe you."
"I'll take you up on that."
"But now, I have you trapped, which means I can kiss you all I want to." Yaz leaned over and covered the Doctor's face in kisses, giggling.
"You didn't have to trap me! You can always kiss me as much as you want." But the Doctor was laughing too.
"I know." Cupping the Doctor's face in her hands, she tenderly kissed her lips.
"Not fair. Dig me out!" the Doctor cried after a minute. "I can't put my arms around you! Also, your hair is tickling my face and I can't do anything about it."
Laughing, Yaz helped the Doctor dig out, then backed away from her. "Well you're not hugging me now! You're covered in sand!"
"I'll wash off in the water." The Doctor walked towards the sparkling turquoise waves and then walked right in without hesitation.
"Is the water warm then?" Yaz asked.
"Yeah, it's lovely. Come join me!"
"All right." Yaz took off her wrap and waded into the water, which was pleasantly warm. The waves lapped against her ankles, then her knees, then her waist. She finally reached the Doctor and took her hands, going in for a kiss.
"You really did pick the perfect honeymoon spot," she said. "It's so peaceful here. And warm. And sunny. Basically, it's nothing like Sheffield."
"I love Sheffield!" insisted the Doctor. "But I thought you'd enjoy something different." She looked around. "I think I have a surfboard somewhere. Do you know how to surf?"
"No." Yaz chuckled. "When would I have learned that in Sheffield?"
"I'll teach you. It's the perfect environment. No sharks! No fish with teeth at all. This planet is a very safe and very popular vacation spot; we're just not near the busy part." Another wave washed over them, and Yaz held onto the Doctor's waist to keep them both upright. The Doctor smiled tenderly at her, her own arms wrapping around Yaz.
"I really love you," Yaz told her.
"I really love you too." The Doctor pulled her in for another kiss, and Yaz allowed herself to get lost in it, pressing her body close to the Doctor's. Suddenly a bigger wave crashed into them, knocking them both off her feet. Yaz scrambled to find the ground again, losing her grip on the Doctor. She felt panic take over for a moment. She couldn't lose the Doctor again, not now…
But just as suddenly, her feet found the sand beneath her again, and she felt the Doctor's hands taking her arms and gently pulling her upright.
"You all right, love?" the Doctor asked, a wet lock of hair falling across her sunglasses.
"Yeah." Smiling in relief, Yaz swept the lock of hair from the Doctor's face. "Yeah, I'm fine."
The rest of the day passed lazily. They splashed in the waves some more, then ate a picnic lunch. Yaz practiced writing Gallifreyan letters in the wet sand with a stick, managing to delight the Doctor by writing "Yaz" without any help. The Doctor then showed her how to write her own true name, but it was long and complicated, and Yaz didn't think she could memorize it in one day. When they tired of the writing lesson, she and the Doctor built a sandcastle together, the most elaborate sandcastle Yaz had ever seen (okay, the Doctor did most of the work). As the suns began to set, the two of them lay back on their blanket, cuddling up together as they watched the sky changing colours. Yaz rested her head comfortably on the Doctor's shoulder, and the Doctor put her left arm around Yaz, threading their fingers together. Then she held their left hands up in front of them, looking at them contemplatively. She reached out with her other hand to stroke Yaz's wedding ring.
"Admiring your work?" Yaz asked her. "Not everyone can say their wedding ring was actually made by their spouse."
"I like seeing it on you," the Doctor admitted, but then she touched her own ring. "I like this one even better though. It means I belong to you." She turned her face and kissed Yaz's head. "I love belonging. I love being yours."
"Me too," Yaz whispered. "I mean, I love being yours. And you being mine."
"The light's fading, though," said the Doctor. "We should go inside and eat dinner."
"And maybe try out that soft bed?" Yaz suggested.
In what light remained, she could see the Doctor's grin. "I think we should."
The Doctor moved against Yaz, breathless. Yaz lay back on the bed, holding her close, eyes closed. The Doctor was on top of her, the two of them moving in rhythm, their swollen clitorises rubbing together, their wetness mingling. The Doctor ran her tongue down Yaz's neck and Yaz gasped, trying to take in every sensation. She had never felt something so intimate in her life. They were almost like one being, striving together towards a common goal. How could Yaz ever have thought something like this would be wrong? It was the most beautiful, most spiritual experience she'd ever had.
The Doctor was right. There were universes inside of her, inside both of them. And those universes were touching now, merging.
The Doctor moved her mouth down to Yaz's left breast while continuing to move against her rhythmically. She ran her tongue along the curve of Yaz's breast and then flicked it against Yaz's nipple a few times before sucking it into her mouth. Yaz moaned, one hand on the back of the Doctor's head to urge her on. The Doctor pulled back, then drew in her breath and blew gently on Yaz's wet nipple. Yaz moaned again as a shiver of delight went through her and the Doctor moved to her right breast, taking the nipple into her mouth and bracing herself against the bed with one hand while her free hand caressed Yaz's left breast. She continued moving against Yaz while she circled her breast with her tongue, sucked the nipple again, then gently blew on it while continuing to fondle the other breast with her hand.
Yaz felt herself climbing towards climax and clutched her wife even harder, straining against her as she began to cry out. She felt the Doctor lift her head and opened her eyes to see hazel eyes staring down into hers, pupils dilated, but with such an expression of love.
"Doctor," Yaz said softly, and then she said her name again, this time the hidden one. The Doctor's eyes closed and she began to cry out as well. Yaz closed her eyes again and let orgasm overtake her, feeling the Doctor shuddering with her own.
Yaz gasped for breath as the Doctor let herself relax, her head falling onto Yaz's shoulder. Yaz wrapped her arms and legs around her, still wanting to keep the skin-to-skin contact going.
"I'm going…to say…something that sounds very cliché," the Doctor said breathlessly, "but I mean every word."
"What's that?" Yaz stroked her hair.
The Doctor kissed Yaz's neck. "This is the best…the best sex I've ever had."
Yaz broke into a grin. "Tonight specifically, or…"
"Being with you, and in this body, is the best. Although it does seem even better every time we do it." She looked up at Yaz, cocking her head. "I think women are just really amazing."
Yaz laughed. "We definitely are. I haven't got anything to compare to, but…I've certainly got no complaints about our sex life. It's kind of beyond beautiful."
"I think I'm spent for tonight though. Pick up again tomorrow?"
"Of course." They had been at it for quite a while, but this was what newlyweds were supposed to do, after all.
The Doctor rolled onto her side and Yaz rolled with her, letting their legs tangle and pressing her forehead against the Doctor's. "I love you so much," she whispered.
"I love you too. More than I can say, but I hope I can show you." The Doctor tugged the blanket over them. "I was so selfish before, when I was afraid to let myself love you because of how much it might hurt in the end. I didn't think about the fact that you might need this." She reached out to stroke Yaz's hair. "You deserve this, to be loved and cherished and worshipped. I'm glad I can give this to you."
"I think you need it too, Doctor. You know the universe needs you, but that's not the same as having one person who sees you for who you are, flaws and all, and just loves you for being you."
The Doctor kissed Yaz tenderly. "You don't know how rare it is for me to actually get that."
"I think I have an idea." Yaz stroked the Doctor's back. "People get overwhelmed by how big you are, how much is inside you, that they forget to see how small you are at the same time. I know you've been a lot of people, but you're only one person right now, and you need to be loved and cherished like anyone else."
The Doctor swallowed. "Even I forget that."
"Well you have it from me now, my love."
"Thank you," the Doctor whispered, burying her face against Yaz's neck. Yaz held her close and drifted off to sleep.
"Yaz." The Doctor's voice, soft and close to her ear, roused her from sleep.
"Mmmm," Yaz groaned.
"Yaz, I'm just gonna go downstairs and make breakfast, okay?"
"No, but I want you to stay." She grasped at the Doctor's middle, trying to snuggle back into her warmth.
"I know, Yaz, but I'm hungry, and you will be too when you're really awake. Go back to sleep, and I'll come get you when it's ready." The Doctor kissed her head before sliding out from under the covers. "Sleep. I'll be back in a bit."
She padded away, and Yaz shifted into the warm spot she'd left behind. She tried to go back to sleep, but the sunlight pouring in through the windows and the lack of a wife to snuggle with made it difficult. Finally she sat up in bed, rubbing sleep from her eyes, and noticed something on the bed beside her: an origami boat made from green paper. Smiling, she picked it up and, noticing there was writing on it, unfolded it and smoothed the creases out.
My dearest, most beautiful Yaz,
As I write this, the suns are coming up and I'm watching the light illuminate you as you sleep. I love to stare at you, to commit every detail to memory so I can keep these moments with me forever. Right now your dark curls are spread out on the pillow, a bit messy but still absolutely beautiful. I'm admiring the contours of your face, your perfect eyebrows, your full lips. I think you're even smiling a little, so I hope that means you're dreaming something nice.
I'm also looking at your smooth, bare shoulders, your delicate chest, your soft, strong arms. You sleep in this position often: on your right side, facing me, with your left hand tucked up under your chin and your right arm sprawled across the mattress, towards me. The blanket's only covering you up to your waist, so I can see the swell of your breasts, so soft and perfect. Under the blanket I can see the curve of your hip, the outline of your legs. There is not one tiny detail I don't love. In the whole of the universe, your beauty is unparalleled. I think I can speak with some authority on the issue.
I don't know how it's possible, but you seem more beautiful every day. I could stare at you for hours and hardly realise time was passing. Maybe it's because I know a little more of what's in your heart each day, and I see your inner beauty on the outside too. That heart, my Yaz, that infinity inside you, is the thing I love most and always will. I try to make sure you see the best of me all the time, as much as possible, but the reality is that I'm always working hard to be a good person, the person I want to be. It's a daily choice for me, because I could so easily go the other way after everything I've seen. But you, you're so effortlessly good. Nothing ever changes that. It's just your nature. You'd never even consider being otherwise. And yet, you're always striving to be better! I know I'm better for being with you. With you at my side I will always be who I want to be, for you.
And so just as your beauty grows, my love for you grows, each and every day. I hope you can feel it all around you, inside you, worshipping you as I worshipped you with my body last night (and will again tonight, and every night going forwards, I hope).
Thank you for this, for agreeing to be my partner through all of time and space.
I'll see you soon!
-love, Doctor
Yaz grinned, folding the paper back into its boat shape. She needed to write a note back, quickly. She looked around and saw the pad of green paper sitting on the nightstand with a pen, clearly left there from the Doctor's morning musings. She picked it up and scrawled a quick note back.
Doctor, my love –
I hope you know you are everything I never dared dream of when I was young and frightened by my own sexuality. Thank you for showing me what it's like to be loved and cherished for who I am. I hope I make you feel the same way. I hope to have many, many nights just like last night!
I love being the only person alive who knows your name…and the only one who's ever been inside of you! Being able to bring you pleasure in this way means the world to me. I know it's an honour few have had. I'm hoping you perform that miracle you've been thinking about, because I want to still be bringing you to climax every night a thousand years from now.
That was guaranteed to make the Doctor blush. Hearing footsteps on the spiral staircase, Yaz quickly signed her name, folded the paper, and tucked it under the Doctor's sunglasses on the nightstand.
"Good morning, wife!" the Doctor said cheerfully as she appeared at the top of the stairs.
"Good morning to you too, wife!" Yaz furrowed her brow, stifling a laugh as she took in the Doctor's fuzzy pink bathrobe. "What are you wearing?"
The Doctor looked down in surprise. "It's a robe. I found it in the TARDIS wardrobe and packed it with my things. I figured, with it being our honeymoon and all, we might spend a lot of time not wearing clothes, so…"
"No, I understand that. I packed a robe too. But how'd you decide on that one?"
The Doctor scrunched up her face, still examining the robe. "What's wrong with this one?"
"It's just so…girly."
"Is it? Well, it fits me, and I am a girl now."
"That you are, you just usually don't dress that girly..."
"Well I'm not going in public, am I? Anyway, breakfast is ready. I made us strawberry chocolate crepes!"
"Oh, that sounds heavenly." Yaz dug out her own bathrobe – a simple white waffle weave – and followed the Doctor downstairs.
Breakfast was heavenly. Crepes were obviously one of the things the Doctor knew how to cook. Once she'd finished drinking her breakfast tea, Yaz wandered back out onto the beach in her bare feet and looked out at the sparkling ocean. The Doctor soon came out behind her, still wearing her fluffy pink bathrobe.
"I never saw any boats come by or anything yesterday," Yaz remarked.
"It's a very remote location. I don't think we will see anyone."
"And the owners? Any chance they might drop in?"
The Doctor tilted her head. "Technically, that would be us."
"You bought the house?"
"It was for sale, and I wanted a private location, so I thought, why not?"
Yaz grinned at her. "So what will we do with it when we're done honeymooning?"
"Don't know. Suppose we could come back any time we want. Or we could give it to someone else."
"So if it's totally private, and no one's going to come by or drop in, do we even need swimsuits?" Yaz loosed her bathrobe, exposing the curve of her breast and watching the Doctor's eyes move right to it.
The Doctor swallowed. "No, not all the time, I suppose," she admitted. "But they might be nice while we're building sandcastles."
"Well, yes. We don't want sand getting in any…unwanted places."
As if unable to resist any longer, the Doctor stooped and reverently kissed the exposed side of Yaz's breast. She ran her tongue along the curve and suddenly looked up, self-consciously, at Yaz's face.
Yaz chuckled. "Don't look sheepish. This is perfectly appropriate honeymoon behaviour."
"I just…really like them," the Doctor said, straightening up. "Your…breasts. They're…well, they're pretty. And soft. I like touching them. And looking at them."
Yaz laughed, kissing her cheek. "I like yours too."
The Doctor cleared her throat. "Right, I'll get the sun cream."
The Doctor gasped, her back arching a little as she grasped at the blanket she lay on. Yaz watched her face as she knelt beside her, moving her fingers inside of her, adjusting her movements to achieve the desired response from her wife. She loved watching the Doctor in ecstasy like this, loved knowing she was the reason. She was the only person who had ever been inside of her, perhaps the only one who ever would be, and she did not take the honour lightly.
The suns were setting before them, the sky turning brilliant colours, but for Yaz it was merely background. Her attention was focused entirely on the beautiful blonde woman before her, who she knew was getting close. She plunged her fingers in deeper, teasing the Doctor's engorged clit with her thumb.
"Yaz, please," the Doctor whispered.
"I've got you. You're almost there." Yaz slipped an arm under the Doctor's back and pulled her closer, kissing the side of her head. "I love you so much, my sweet wife." To emphasize that she thrust even harder, causing the Doctor to cry out and throw her head back, thrusting her pelvis upwards to take Yaz in better. "Almost there," Yaz repeated softly, urging her along until she felt her clench around her fingers, eyes closed as she cried her ecstasy to the skies, heels digging into the blanket beneath her. Yaz held her close and guided her through the climax, planting kisses along her face, neck, shoulder. Finally the Doctor went limp in Yaz's arms, working to catch her breath.
"There you are, my love." Yaz withdrew her fingers slowly and, without a second thought, put them into her mouth. The Doctor, reviving, sat up and watched her. "You taste good," Yaz said with a smirk.
"As do you, my sweet love," said the Doctor breathlessly. "You're getting better all the time at…at that."
"Well, practice makes perfect." Yaz felt a cool breeze blow over her naked body and shivered a little.
"It's getting dark," the Doctor pointed out. "Should we go inside?"
"We could. Or we could build a campfire on the beach, before it gets too dark to find wood."
The Doctor lit up. "Oh, I love a good campfire! I've got marshmallows in the TARDIS kitchen. I might even have graham crackers. Have you ever had s'mores?"
Yaz shook her head. "I think I've seen them on TV though."
"I'll show you how to make one! You build the fire and find some good sticks for the marshmallows. I'll be back with the goods." The Doctor dug around in her bag for her robe and yanked it on as she ran for the TARDIS. Yaz dutifully gathered wood in the last light and piled it up on the sand near their blanket. Then she pulled out the sonic and ignited the fire the way she'd seen the Doctor do, tucking the sonic safely back into the Doctor's bag and sitting back to admire her work.
The Doctor returned soon with a new bag of supplies and an extra blanket.
"Thought we'd want to wrap this around ourselves, since the breeze does get chilly at night," she said, dropping the blanket around Yaz's shoulders before sitting down next to her. "Did you find sticks we can use for skewers?"
"Yep." Yaz handed the Doctor a stick and held up her own. The Doctor got out two marshmallows and put them on the ends of the sticks, and they both held them up to the fire. The Doctor casually shrugged off her bathrobe and wrapped herself up in the blanket with Yaz.
"We're naked on the beach with a campfire," Yaz said dreamily. "This is a perfect night."
"I know, right? I know how to plan a good date."
"Bet you've dazzled lots of women like this."
"I've certainly dazzled other women, but not like this. This is my first naked beach marshmallow roast, and you're my first Yaz." The Doctor's marshmallow caught fire and she quickly blew it out before biting into the blackened shell. Yaz smiled, watching her lick the marshmallow goo from her lips. She took her own marshmallow away from the fire and bit into it.
"Okay, I'll make you a s'more now," the Doctor said. "Here, take this graham cracker, and then you have to put a piece of chocolate on top. You hold that, and I'll roast you a marshmallow."
"Wow, you got out the good chocolate for this!"
"No other chocolate will do on our honeymoon!" The new marshmallow caught fire and the Doctor blew it out, then slid it off the stick and onto Yaz's chocolate. "Now put another graham cracker on top and squish it all together, and the heat from the marshmallow melts the chocolate. See?"
Yaz grinned. There was no light left but the firelight and moonlight, but she could see the chocolate starting to drip. "Yeah. So now I eat it?"
"Eat it like a sandwich!"
Yaz took a bite. "Mmm."
"You like it?" the Doctor asked eagerly.
"It's delicious. I'm dripping chocolate on myself though."
"Yeah." The Doctor swiped some chocolate off Yaz's face and then licked it off her fingers. Then she noticed some drops on Yaz's breast and bent to lick those off too.
"You can't help yourself, can you?" Yaz giggled.
"Why should I?" The Doctor sat up and looked into Yaz's eyes, reaching to push some of her hair behind her ear. "I just…I want us to go on like this forever."
"On an island?"
"No, I want to travel again when our honeymoon is over – have adventures, save planets, all that – but I want it to always be you and me. I never want to be alone again." She looked away, into the fire, and swallowed. "I can't stand the thought of losing you."
"So don't think about it!" Yaz bumped her shoulder against the Doctor's. "We're on our honeymoon. This is no time to think about my eventual death! I assure you, I'm not thinking about it."
"No, neither am I. But thoughts of my empty future keep creeping back in." She turned back to face Yaz. "It's finally happened. I've found someone I can't bear to lose. I have to find a way to make sure I don't lose you."
Yaz nodded. "I gave you my consent for that, and we have a plan. But right now, we're making s'mores, okay?"
The Doctor nodded slowly. "Right. Sorry. It's just, my mind wanders sometimes."
"Sometimes your fears take over."
"Yeah, well, I'm only…whatever I am."
"You're my Doctor, the best and most brilliant person I've ever known. Who is also sometimes an idiot."
"Can't deny that."
"Can you just try not to be an idiot on our honeymoon?" Yaz leaned her head against the Doctor's.
"Yeah, of course. I mean, we're married now, so you're stuck with me. It doesn't matter if I'm scared. I just…want you to be my forever. You're the one." She tugged at the blanket around her shoulder. "And what I'm doing with you…I really haven't done anything like this in a very long time, and I thought I never would again, and I really didn't plan to ever again, and I probably wouldn't be now if you hadn't almost got eaten by a bird."
"But you were married before."
"Yes, but we didn't live together, most of the time. She came and went, and we led separate lives, and it still nearly destroyed me when I lost her. But you're here all the time. My whole life revolves around you. You really are my other half, which I don't think anyone else has ever been. If we live like this for years, I can't even imagine what it would do to me to lose you. I don't know how I'd go on." She blinked rapidly a few times. "You're everything to me."
"I know," Yaz said gently. "And I will do everything in my power to make sure that doesn't happen. I can't just leave you alone." She took out a marshmallow and put it on her stick. "But for now, let's make you a s'more."
The Doctor smiled. "Yeah. Chocolate. That's what I need."
"And for me to lick off any that drips on you?"
The Doctor laughed. "Yeah. Definitely that."
"Can we sleep out here?" Yaz asked as she turned the marshmallow to make sure each side got toasted. "Under the stars?"
"Yeah, I don't see why not," said the Doctor thoughtfully. "The weather's supposed to be clear tonight. Tomorrow thunderstorms will be rolling in, so we'll have to stay inside."
"Oh no, a whole day stuck in bed!" Yaz said with a grin. Deciding the marshmallow was done, she removed it from the stick and put it on the chocolate and graham cracker the Doctor had assembled.
"We don't have to spend the whole day in bed. I brought a jigsaw puzzle."
"Well that was completely unnecessary." Yaz set down her stick and wrapped her arms tightly around the Doctor, kissing her neck. "I think we're going to spend the entire day in bed."
She felt the Doctor shiver, but saw her smile. "Yeah, I s'pose we are."
Once they'd eaten their fill of s'mores, the two women stretched out on the blankets and the Doctor wrapped them up together. Yaz lay back with her head against the Doctor's shoulder and looked up at the stars, amazed by how many she could see out here with no light pollution. The Doctor pointed out some stars that were actually planets, told some stories about times she had visited some of those planets, and then argued with herself a bit when she realised she might have gotten two planets mixed up, then decided she hadn't. They even saw a comet go by, and at first Yaz couldn't think of a wish to make because she already had everything she wanted. Before she lost sight of it, though, she wished she would live as long as the Doctor so the Doctor would never have to be alone again and wouldn't regret marrying her.
Eventually, Yaz had enough of stars and turned to face her beloved, throwing her arm over the Doctor's middle and pressing her forehead against a soft cheek.
"Don't tell me you're bored with stars," the Doctor said, wrapping her arms around her.
"Never." Yaz lifted her head and kissed her. "You've given me the stars, Doctor, and I'll always be grateful for that. But you're still the most amazing thing I've found in the whole universe."
The Doctor grinned up at her, and Yaz noticed the way her pale skin seemed to glow in the moonlight. "Likewise."
"Really?"
"Yes, really. Just think of all the little things that had to transpire over billions of years in order to create the perfect conditions to make one magnificent Yaz, and how empty the universe would be if you weren't in it. I think about it every day."
Yaz felt a blush rise in her cheeks, as she often did when the Doctor spoke of her like this. Smiling, she put her head back down and snuggled in closer. A cool ocean breeze ruffled her hair, but the Doctor held her close, keeping her warm.
As she knew she always would.
