Chapter 4: Kyle's new look
Disclaimer: I do not own South Park or its characters, they are owned by Trey Parker and Matt Stone. I only own Hector and Emily because they are my OCs. Samantha Himitsu appears courtesy of Modestneko. I also do not own the song and lyrics featured, some lyrics might be changed. Anyways, enjoy.
Every kid was attending school, and so far no one was rioting that school was a thing. But one kid was having a bad day, it was Kyle. He just got out of the hospital, but was now wearing a Halloween mask (which was the haunted mask from Goosebumps, btw, yes, you can actually buy one) after Hector used his dragon breath to burn the Jew's face.
Now, Kyle has to wear this Halloween mask so the other kids don't laugh at him. It's like the book Wonder, except Kyle doesn't become cool in the end.
Kyle took his seat in class, and everyone immediately noticed his mask.
"Hey, kosher boy, what's with the Halloween mask?" asked Cartman, mockingly.
"My face got burned to a crisp, so I have to wear this shitty mask to cover up the burn marks," said Kyle, who was pissed off. "You can thank Hector for making me look like Freddy Krueger."
"Oh, that reminds me," said Hector, as he and Emily went to the front of the class for show and tell. "We've prepared a song to emphasize about Kyle's deformed face before he went to the hospital." He then put a photo of Kyle's old face on the projection screen. "Stan, Butters, cue the music."
"On it," said Stan, as he pressed start on the boombox.
The Ugly Truth by Nick Jonas
Hector: I know he hopes to go to the big you-know-where
And he's here to try and earn his ticket there
Better listen now cause he hasn't got a prayer
Let me break it down, ooh
Emily (facing Kyle): If you want us all to love ya
You gotta look like these three (Hector, Stan, Butters: Us three)
Gotta be flawless, pure perfection, not yourself (Hector, Stan, Butters: Not yourself)
And our first impression of ya, as far as we could see (Hector, Stan, Butters: Can see)
Is you simply can't compete with our sweet selves (Hector, Stan, Butters: Our sweet selves)
Butters: Is your hair as thick as mine? (The class: No)
Stan: Are your arms as bumped as mine? (The class: No)
Hector (break dancing): Are the moves you got as drop-dead hot as this?
(The class: No, no, they ain't)
Is your profile half this fine? (The class: No)
Since not, let me hit you with the bottom line
Got to measure up or you won't get eternal bliss (The class: Ooh)
Stan: So let us be honest (The class: Honest)
Butters: We gotta be honest (The class: Honest)
Emily: We're gonna be honest (The class: Ah yeah)
Hector: Whether you like it or not
Stan (near the Kyle photo): You're much too short (The class: Too short)
And way too thin (The class: Too thin)
Is that a blemish on your triple chin? (The class: Oh man)
Don't ever walk a runway (The class: No)
Or man a kissing booth (Emily: Mwah)
You're U-G-L-Y (The class: Ugly)
The class: You ugly, ah ah, you ugly
You ugly, ah ah, you ugly
Hector: Now perhaps we've just upset ya
But Kyle, let's get real (The class: Get real)
It's the most exclusive club that you want in (The class: Want in)
There's a price to pay, you betcha
Hey, you gotta look ideal (The class: Ideal)
Or you'll end up in the ugly compost bin (The class: Compost bin)
Butters: Is your smile as wide as this? (The class: No)
Emily: Are your glutes as tight as this? (The class: No)
Stan: Then we'll trash you and we'll
Mash you into glue (The class: Ooh, poor poor you)
It's a flawless? Is this
Just one tiny detail, you're a big ol' mess
Emily: Oops, oh well, I'm sorry, sayonara, too-da-loo (The class: Ooh)
Hector: And hey, we can't help ya (The class: Oh yeah)
Well, possibly help ya (The class: Oh yeah)
Hopefully don't help ya (The class: Oh yeah)
But hopefully, probably not
Stan: Your head's too small (The class: Too small)
Your neck's too long (The class: Too long)
Your nose starts right but then ends up all wrong (The class: So wrong)
Mm, that giant freckle (The class: Ugh)
Ooh, that crooked tooth
You're U-G-L-Y (The class: Ugly)
And that's the ugly truth
The class: U-G-L-Y, face like that, why even try?
U-G-L-Y, like triple?
U-G-L-Y, sorry if that makes you cry
You're ugly, so ugly, so
Hector (once Kyle took off his mask): Wait!
Emily: Look at you, look at you, look at you
I ain't seen nothing like you before
I mean, words fail me, I mean I'm tongue-tied
I mean I'm speechless, maybe
What's a thing like you doing in a place like this?
I gotta tell ya, Jew, you're pretty (The class: Pretty ugly)
Hector: And that's the ugly truth
The class: U-G-L-Y, heard your looks?
Hector: Yeah, so sorry 'bout the truth
The class: U-G-L-Y, cross my heart and hope to die
Hector: Woo, 'cause that's the ugly truth
The class: U-G-L-Y, love to kiss my lunch goodbye
Yeah, you're U-G-L-Y
Hector: And that's the ugly truth
Everyone cheered at the end of the song, except for Kyle, who was not amused. Kyle slammed his fists on his desk, causing everyone to go silent.
"You all think it's funny, don't you?! Well, you won't think it's funny when I kill all of you," said Kyle, in a fit of rage. "You'll see, you'll all see!" He then stormed out of the classroom, slamming the door on his way out.
"Wow, someone has sand in their vagina, and for once it's not me," said Emily, causing everyone to burst into laughter.
The next day…
Hector and Emily were watching Tiny Toon Adventures, when Stan and Samantha burst through the door.
"Guys, there's a bank robbery at the South Park bank!" said Samantha.
"So? The bank teller should get robbed after robbing people of their money," said Emily. She then realized that specific bank teller was executed for stealing money. "Wait, let's get over there." They all quickly changed into their superhero suits, and took a cab to the South Park bank.
At the bank…
Once they were at the bank, they were joined by the other Freedom Pals.
"We're here, where's the robber?" asked Spider-Kid.
"He's inside. Take the civilians out of the bank while some of us take on the robber," said Toolshed.
They all went inside, where the bank robber revealed himself to be… Kyle. "Hello, Freedom Pals," said Kyle. He was wearing a black cloak, sunglasses, and a black version of his iconic hat. "Do you like the new look? It really suits my personality."
"Sure does, it makes you look extra gay," said Super Craig, causing the other Freedom Pals to laugh.
"Whatever, I'm still gonna kill you assholes," said Kyle, who was really pissed off.
"Shouldn't we take this fight outside?" asked Nekomancer.
"We don't pick the ballroom, babe, we just dance," said Toolshed. And just like that, the battle was on.
The Freedom Pals kept kicking Kyle in the balls, before letting Spider-Kid burn the still living Jew. Kyle then screamed in pain, before he stopped moving. "Let's get the fuck out of here," said Spider-Kid, to which they did. Little did they know, a strange man put the fire out, and carried the body to god knows where.
That man… was Kyle's dad, who was now a broken man after his wife committed suicide, followed by Ike going back to his biological parents. He now had a long beard, and bags under his eyes. He already lost most of his family, he didn't want to lose the last bit of family he had.
"Don't worry, Kyle. Daddy's here," said Kyle's dad, in a raspy voice. "I'll make you all better back home." He then took the lifeless body of his son back to his house. "You'll pay for this, Hector."
Pretty dark, isn't it? I wanted to go for a dark story, but I decided to add a few jokes to lighten the mood. Also, I wanted to show (or in this case, type) the death of Kyle's mom, but I don't want to be called a Marty Stu so it was cut. And yes, I'll add Hector and Emily's MegaMan suits (I don't own that) in the finale of this story. Anyways, sorry if this took so long to release, I had some final exams at school, and a bad case of writer's block, but it was all worth it. Have a great day, everyone.
