The Ebon Hawk was flying in a safe area. As we escaped from the Leviathan, our crew had been chased by a few Sith starfighters, but they were far too few to stop the Hawk. After Carth entered the coordinates for Korriban, we began the journey to the Sith planet, where the last star map was situated.

We had not yet had a chance to talk about what had happened on the Leviathan. We took advantage of the hyperspace travel time to gather around the communicator in the central room of the ship. Carth was nervously stomping at the mouth of the corridor leading to the cockpit. Juhani and Jolee were patiently waiting near the sickbay. On the other side stood Mission, Zaalbar, and a little further back was Canderous. T3-M4 was handling the ship, and HK-47, now powered down, was stationary in a corner of the room. I was standing a few feet away from Carth, staring at the floor, lost in an insufferable numbness. I timidly raised my head, scanned my companions, and sighed helplessly: deep down, I hoped to spot the silhouette of Bastila, who would have managed to join our crew at the very last moment, magically appearing. However, of course, these were vain thoughts. Bastila was no longer with us, and was now in the hands of Malak. I turned my gaze to the ground once more, and nervously ran my hand over my chin.

The group was silent. No one dared to speak up. Yet there was so much to be said. At last Mission seized the initiative:

"Are we ever going to bloody talk to each other?!" She asked angrily. Each member of the crew turned their heads towards the young Twi'lek in a palpable unease. I remained in the same posture.

"Why isn't Bastila here? What happened?" She continued briskly.

I finally glanced up at Mission, whose attention was also drawn to me. The teenager left her rage behind, and flashed an emotional look at my distressed appearance.

"We faced Malak. Bastila stayed behind, so we could escape." Carth announced dispassionately.

There was a new tension in the room. Mission stared at me, and seemed unsure of how to react. She probably didn't want to make me any more upset, but she had to know:

"She's dead?" She finally asked, her eyes drifting back to Carth. The question made me flinch slightly, as if the mere mention of such a dire possibility was enough of a pain in itself. Jolee took a few steps forward, shot me a worried look, before answering the Twi'lek:

"Don't be silly, Mission." He began. "Malak won't kill her. He needs her talents badly."

I focused my attention on the old Jedi, listening carefully. "Nevertheless, it is obvious that Bastila cannot handle the Dark Lord and the entire crew of the Leviathan. She is now captive."

"In this tragedy, there is one positive aspect to be noted." Juhani added, coming forward and giving me a supportive nod. "I'm sorry to be so cynical, but we all know that Malak is now going to devote all his time to Bastila, and to her turning to the dark side. Now that we are no longer the Dark Lord's priority, we should certainly be able to complete our quest in more favourable conditions."

"Those are indeed very cynical words." I said darkly, glancing disapprovingly.

Juhani was staring at me with the same sorry yet resolved look. Mission, on the other hand, was utterly stunned by the news and Juhani's somewhat cruel words. So she stepped forward and regained the full attention of the group:

"Do you not care that Bastila is in this situation? " Questioned the scandalised girl.

I cast my eyes over her. In some ways I was glad that someone had raised this issue. I knew perfectly well what feedback the teenager would be receiving. And I knew that this feedback would be of the most reasonable nature. But it would in no way soothe the ache that was gripping my heart at that moment. I held back the words that Mission had apparently assumed responsibility - with an impertinence that I thought quite healthy.

No one spoke back to the Twi'lek at this point, and this seemed to prompt her to carry on.

"Bastila is in Malak's hands, and all you can think of to say is 'good news! Let's move to Korriban!"?

"No one said such a thing, Mission." Jolee retorted wisely. "You know very well that we have a higher priority, and that priority is not Bastila. She allowed us to escape so that we could conclude our mission and stop Malak. Not so we can argue about going back for her. You know very well that we do things the way they should be done. We will not turn back."

Each new word was a blow to my chest. But what could I do? Jolee's words to Mission were appropriate. There was no point in arguing about it. Bastila had made her choice. She had saved us all, and given the Republic a little more breathing space against Malak. I just stared at Jolee in perfect silence. The old Jedi said briefly:

"This is the best solution we have to get Bastila back."

I nodded to myself, without catching anyone's eye. Yet I could feel Mission's gaze on me, I could sense that she didn't expect me to endorse it so easily. In an effort not to discuss it further, and not to hear any more words reminding me of Bastila's absence, I raised my head and declared firmly:

"Then let's get to work."

"Not so fast." Carth interrupted, his arms crossed, his eyes severely fixed on me. "It seems to me that there's an important notice that you haven't delivered to the group." I turned to Carth, tacitly imploring him to leave the matter alone. But I knew Carth wasn't going to let it go. And I knew I shouldn't keep it a secret.

"I know this information was supposed to be shared by Bastila, but it just happens that she is not in a position to keep her word right now." I shot the Lieutenant a hostile look, shocked by the obvious lack of empathy he was displaying. Carth held my gaze with a degree of defiance. I understood that these cruel words were not really aimed at Bastila. They were very clearly directed at me. Carth wanted to make me pay for being alive and for the crimes of a past I couldn't remember.

"So!" The man urged forcefully. "Tell them!"

I remained in a state of silence I could not break. I wanted to, but it was just too difficult. Carth was getting impatient and started stamping his feet. Suddenly the Lieutenant strode the few steps away from me. He grabbed my sleeve violently and shoved me against the communicator, making my sorry person literally the centre of attention of the entire crew. The violence of Carth's gesture, however, had caused the others to react, and they all instinctively took a step towards us both.

"Come on Carth, what's wrong with you?!" Canderous asked loudly, who had been remaining silent until now.

"Oh no! I'm not the one to take the blame here! I have nothing to be blamed for from any of you!" The man emotionally proclaimed to the whole group and then he redirected his attention to me.

"SPEAK, YOU MONSTER!" He shouted, unable to contain the tears that had formed in his eyes.

I held the Lieutenant's gaze in shock, but at last I reacted by gently raising my hand to Carth, to let him know that I was about to talk. The Lieutenant fell silent and stared at me intently. I shook my head and assumed an upright posture, as if to make the moment ahead more solemn, out of respect for those who would listen.

"I was taught on the Leviathan that I was not who I thought I was. That you all thought I was."

Juhani, Canderous, Mission, and Zaalbar showed a bewildered look on their faces. Everyone was giving each other questioning glances, waiting for me to clarify what I was saying.

"This amnesia, which I thought was the result of a bad accident, would actually have nothing to do with it. The ease with which I learned the Jedi teachings wouldn't be coming from nowhere either. Nor would this connection with Bastila."

I allowed myself a couple of seconds' pause, before resuming with embarrassment:

"It's very difficult for me to explain all this to you, because I don't even understand it very well. I don't remember anything. What I'm about to tell you, I have no memory of that. So please don't feel shocked if you think that I'm not getting invested in this news, since I can' t feel it is all about me."

"What are you talking about?" Juhani asked composedly.

"I'm getting to it. I'm getting to it." I took a deep breath and launched into the ultimate revelation. "I had already received the teachings of the Order, long before I knew any of you. I had already met Bastila, long before I met you, because... because she saved me, about two years ago, when she was sent to eliminate me."

Juhani stepped back instinctively as the revelation began to make sense. Mission, who didn't seem to have reached that point of understanding, stared at the Cathar, confused.

"Two years ago, Bastila Shan did not kill Darth Revan."

I finally stated more straightforwardly, staring into space. "Malak, in the hope of killing two enemies at once, had bombed the cruiser in which they were. That was a failure. For, while Revan was in critical condition, Bastila was in good health. So she took the opportunity to try and save the Dark Lord from the brink of death. And she succeeded. By creating a bond between her and him."

Mission let out an offended groan and covered her mouth with both hands. Zaalbar gave a low growl, supporting the Twi'lek by the shoulders. Juhani stared at me with deep suspicion, as did Carth, who kept his arms crossed. Canderous showed no sign of anything particular, he was just listening. Jolee, on the other hand, was looking at me with a surprising compassion and sympathy. I observed my companions, not quite able to hide my concern.

"I am Revan... And I'm sorry." I concluded merely, in a voice filled with regret.

The others stood in a thick silence. They all stared at me, but no one seemed to know what to say, once again. Carth finally spoke:

"This is what the Jedi and Bastila have been hiding from us all along." The group's attention then shifted to the Lieutenant. He approached me, and gave me a defiant look, before addressing the group again.

"What do we do with him now?" He asked casually, as if it were a perfectly logical question. The crew looked puzzled by this, and gazed at Carth in disbelief.

"What do you mean, 'what do we do with him?'" Juhani replied, who, in spite of the shock of the revelation, appeared to keep a welcome intellectual coldness under such circumstances.

"Juhani, we can't travel any further with a Sith Lord on board." Carth retorted.

"There's a Sith Lord on board?" The young Cathar questioned, as she also crossed her arms, challenging the stance of the Lieutenant, who was caught off guard and at a loss for an answer. "In our small group, I can see a Mandalorian, a young Twi'lek, a Wookie, two droids, three Jedi, and yourself Carth."

The young woman stepped closer to me and placed a hand on my shoulder in a friendly manner. I looked at her with deep emotion and gratitude, yet I remained silent.

"This is particularly disturbing news. But I trust actions. We've been travelling together for months. Did you ever have the slightest doubt about this man's reliability?" Juhani urged, her eyes scanning the audience. Then, redirecting her gaze to me, she finished, " I have full faith in you, Revan. And you have my deepest gratitude."

Being called by this name was for the time very difficult for me.

So much so that I found myself flinching slightly, which I thought had gone unnoticed by my companions. Despite feeling a furious desire, I decided not to correct the Jedi. After all, that was now the name I should be called. I had to accept this reality. Even if it seemed very alien to me right now. I laid my hand on the Cathar's, which was still on my shoulder, and simply whispered to her, "Thank you. The young woman only smiled at me, and returned to her position next to Jolee, who was also smiling, which caught my attention.

"What is it, Jolee?" I asked with almost childlike curiosity.

"I am quite satisfied!" He replied. I frowned. I didn't quite understand the old Jedi's words, but he went on, "It had to be released at some point. I wish Bastila had done it sooner, but it didn't happen."

"You knew?" Carth enragedly snapped, walking up to the old man, clearly not intimidated by the Lieutenant.

"Of course I knew. It was obvious." The group was stunned, a fact that certainly amused Jolee.

"But it wasn't my place to mention it."

"Didn't it ever bother you?" I questioned anxiously.

"If it had bothered me, I would have stayed on Kashyyyk, you idiot."

I smiled and nodded appreciatively. Being insulted by Jolee was a demonstration of his esteem. And in these circumstances, it meant even more than usual.

"Don't you have any memories of your past?" Mission asked.

"Pieces, which I thought were just visions until now. " I admitted.

"So there's nothing to worry about." The teenager said quite casually, giving a knowing look to her Wookie companion.

"What if those memories come back?" Carth countered, addressing the girl, and went on vehemently, "How do we know he won't dive again? How do we know that this man will not betray us?"

"For now, there is no question of that, Carth." I riposted, drawing the Lieutenant's attention to me. "I know where I stand. I know what I want, and what I want does not lie in darkness."

I paused for a second, just to punctuate my speech. I did not take my eyes off the Lieutenant. I was going to do everything in my power to calm his fears, which I nevertheless considered very legitimate.

"Almost all my memories are still hidden deep inside me. I don't know how I'm going to deal with their resurgence, that's for sure - if they ever come back. But in the meantime, Carth, I serve the very same cause as you, and you need my few fragments of memory to put an end to Malak's actions. So we should resume our quest for that last star map. So we can wipe out Malak's forces and bring Bastila back."

Carth clearly couldn't bear the thought of continuing the quest for the star maps with me at his side. But my speech - which certainly offered no guarantee that I would not one day find my old demons - had seemingly been successful. I had proved myself to be reasonable, even if it did not in any way erase the potential threat that I represented. Carth drew a long breath, took his eyes off me for a moment, and then spoke in a defeated voice:

"And she always trusted you. Well, I'll give you the benefit of the doubt. To get this damn mission done, to kill Malak, and save Bastila. But no more."

"I ask nothing more." I replied, attempting to comfort my colleague. All I received in reply was a simple nod. Which I already considered a great progress.

"Good." Carth said briskly.

"Time to prepare for our final destination!" The man took a few steps towards the cockpit and, before finally entering the corridor, he exclaimed: "Let's get this over with."

The rest of the group shared supportive looks, and eventually slowly dispersed to get back to work. Before doing so, everyone came to me, and gave me a friendly pat before leaving the room. Canderous, who had not expressed an opinion about my identity, gave me an even warmer tap than the others:

"Glad to have a guy like you with us." He simply stated before heading back to the workbench.

I was surprised by this declaration. A few years before, he and I had been open enemies: Canderous fighting with the Mandalorians, I with the Republic. And it appeared that I had been their worst nightmare during that war. But I remembered that the Mandalorians had great respect for the bravest fighters, whether they were on their side or another. Canderous had obviously put that past behind him, and now regarded me as his ally.

I finally stood alone with a powered-down HK-47 in the central room of the Ebon Hawk. I breathed a slight sigh of relief and smiled discreetly. However, the smile soon disappeared and was replaced by a feeling of distress: images of Bastila were coming to me.

"We'll get her back, Corem."

This voice, out of nowhere, made me flinch. I looked up and saw Mission in the distance. She had apparently turned back to join me again. I let out a nervous smile, sniffed slightly, and, with a nervous look at the teenager, I replied weakly:

"Yes, Mission. We'll get her back."


I've finished part of my ongoing work, so I'm slowly getting back into translation. I can' t promise to fully dive in! I have to keep my work in mind.

Remaining chapters: one post-Leviathan chapter, three Lehon chapters, two Star Forge chapters, and three post-Forge chapters.