Chapter 1: Invitation
Maura
Maura glanced around the bullpen to see who was around before settling her gaze on her best friend. Jane looked exhausted, and Maura was worried about her. She had been for months. She knew that Jane had had a difficult year – they all had – but Jane seemed to be withdrawing even more over time rather than returning to her old self.
Jane was working more than ever, and she seemed to have even less time to spend with Maura. They hadn't spent time together outside of work in weeks, and their 'hangouts' had gotten increasingly infrequent over the past year. Maura kept hoping that it was a phase that would pass, but as time went on, that seemed less and less likely.
But next week was the one-year anniversary of Barry Frost's death, and Maura wanted – no needed – to spend time with her best friend. She needed to know that Jane was okay, even if it was without her.
Maura took one more look around. There were plenty of people milling around the bullpen, but none of their friends were around, meaning that this was Maura's best opportunity to talk to Jane. She took a deep breath, smoothed the nonexistent wrinkles from her skirt, and walked towards her friend. She plastered her best smile on her face, trying to hide her latent anxiety, before she was standing in front of Jane.
"Hello, Jane," Maura greeted, sitting primly in the chair next to Jane's desk.
"Hey, Maur," Jane replied, only glancing fleetingly at Maura before concentrating on her paperwork again.
"I was wondering if you would like to come over after work for pizza and a movie."
"I'm sorry," Jane said without looking up. "I can't. I have plans tonight."
"Oh, okay," Maura said sadly, unable to hide the disappointment in her voice. The tone caught Jane's attention and her head whipped up to actually look at Maura for the first time in weeks.
Jane dropped her pen and gave Maura her full attention. "I'm sorry, Maura," she said genuinely. "I-I have something I have to do tonight and this weekend, but let's plan for next weekend. I know I've been a crappy friend lately, and I'm sorry. I…I never meant to…I'm sorry. I promise I'll be better. I hope you know it's not you. It's me. I've just been…" Jane let out a shaky breath. "I miss spending time with you, and I'm really sorry that I haven't been prioritizing our friendship lately."
Maura opened and closed her mouth a few times. She had half-expected Jane to decline her invitation, but she had not at all expected Jane's confession.
"It's okay, Jane," Maura said quietly. "I know you've been busy."
"It's not okay," Jane said. "I'm sorry I can't do tonight, but can we plan for next Friday?"
Maura smiled, but she knew it didn't reach her eyes. "Of course, Jane," she said. "Next Friday will be wonderful. I should get back downstairs. I'll probably be here for about another hour, but if I don't see you before you leave, have a good weekend."
"I'm off at 4:30pm," Jane said. "I'll stop by to say goodbye, okay?"
"Okay," Maura said with a nod. She reached out and gave Jane's forearm a gentle squeeze as she stood up. "I'll be in my office."
"Thanks, Maur," Jane said. "See you in a bit."
Maura smiled at Jane before making her way back to the elevator. She was disappointed that Jane didn't seem to be available at all this weekend. She didn't want to spend the weekend before the anniversary of Frost's death alone, and she really didn't want Jane to spend this weekend alone – although, she supposed she didn't really know that Jane was going to be alone.
Jane
Jane watched Maura's retreating figure. She felt bad about turning down Maura's invitation, especially when she heard the disappointment in her best friend's voice. She meant it when she said that she missed spending time with Maura. She had been struggling at lot since Frost's death and her miscarriage, but she seemed to have found something that had helped. She just hadn't had the courage to tell anyone about it yet, not even Maura.
Except her best friend deserved better.
Jane tried to force her attention back to her paperwork, but it didn't work. Her mind kept traveling back to the sadness she heard in Maura's voice. It absolutely broke her heart, and it killed her to know that she was contributing to that sadness.
Her best friend deserved better.
Jane buried her face in her hands as her elbows rested on her desk. She knew she needed to do something to make up for her behavior over the past few months and especially for being so distant from Maura. Part of her wanted to just cancel her weekend plans so that she could go to Maura's for movie night, but the other part of her knew that she needed this weekend. It's not that Maura didn't also make her feel better – in fact, no one in the world made Jane feel better than Maura did – she just wished that she could go through with her plans and be with Maura. It shouldn't be all about her though.
Her best friend deserved better.
Jane swiftly pushed herself out of her chair. She gathered her things and stuffed her paperwork in her desk. She'd finish it next week. It was close enough to 4:30pm for her to call it a day.
Jane rode the elevator down to the morgue, her foot tapping impatiently as she waited. She barely waited for the doors to open before she stepped out. When she reached Maura's office, she lingered for a second to take in the image of her friend. Maura was clearly deep in concentration as she typed furiously on her laptop. She paused briefly to push some stray curls behind her ear.
Jane knocked softly before stepping into the office and closing the door behind her.
"Hi, Jane," Maura said, her surprise that Jane closed the door evident in her voice.
"Hey, do you have a minute?" Jane asked.
"Yes, for you…always," Maura said genuinely as she closed her laptop to give Jane her full attention. Maura stood from her desk and joined Jane on the couch.
Jane pushed her hair back with her hand as she tried to figure out where to start. "I'm not good at this," she admitted softly.
Instead of answering, Maura reached out and took both of Jane's hands in hers.
"I guess it's no secret that this past year has sucked. We've all lost so much, and I guess…I don't know…I didn't really know how to deal with it," Jane said.
"I'm worried about you, Jane."
"I'm sorry, Maura. I'm sorry I've been such a crappy friend…"
But Maura shook her head. "No, Jane, you have nothing to be sorry about. You don't need to apologize for taking care of yourself…for doing what you need to do to get better. I just…I just want to know that you're okay."
"It's not just about me though," Jane countered. "You've been through a lot too. We all have. I shoulda been there for you. I shoulda been around for you. I'm sorry."
"If you're taking care of yourself, then that's what I need. I'll be okay," Maura said.
"Oh, Maura," Jane said, tugging Maura's hands to pull the other woman towards her. Jane wrapped her arms around Maura in a comforting embrace. "You deserve better than that." They sat together in silence for a few moments before Jane continued, "I'm going camping this weekend. That's where I've been going most of my weekends off since early spring. I'm sorry I didn't tell you."
"Camping?" Maura said in surprise as she sat back up.
Jane laughed. "Yeah, I don't know why I felt so weird about telling you…about telling anyone," she said. "But something about being out in nature…I don't know…it seems to help."
Maura gave Jane a real smile for the first time in weeks. "I'm glad it helps," she said. "There's actually a significant amount of research that suggests…"
"No, no, no," Jane said, shaking her head violently and waving her hands between them. "Don't ruin it with research." Jane had to laugh at the interaction.
Maura laughed lightly in response. "Sorry," she said sheepishly.
"I feel like I need to go this weekend…cause'a…you know…what next week is," Jane continued. "But I meant it when I said I miss spending time with you. I-I wish I could do both…"
Maura smiled. "It's okay, Jane," she said truthfully. "You should go this weekend. We can have a movie night next weekend. I'll always be here for you."
"You always have been," Jane whispered.
"And maybe one day, you'll want some company," Maura said quietly.
Jane laughed at Maura's comment, thinking she was attempting sarcasm. She would love it if Maura would join her, but that would never happen.
"I just meant…" Maura stumbled over her words.
"Wait?" Jane said in surprise. "Were you serious?"
"I'm not trying to interrupt your weekend. I completely understand needing time alone," Maura said hurriedly. "I just thought…when you're ready…if…I mean…"
"It's camping, Maura," Jane said. "Like, carry your crap on your back, sleep in a tent, cook over a fire camping. God, I would love for you to be there with me, for you to come. But it's camping, and you're…well, camping doesn't really seem like it would be your thing."
"Just because I choose luxury when it is available doesn't mean that I can't also enjoy the simpler things in life, especially when it comes to spending time in nature," Maura said. "When I was working in Ethiopia, toilet paper was a luxury. I know how to 'rough it' as you say."
"Well, I bring my own toilet paper, so you can have whatever kind you want, but seriously, Maur, if you want to come…"
"I wasn't trying to interject my presence on your relaxing weekend," Maura reiterated.
"Okay, I'm too tired to keep talking in circles," Jane huffed good-naturedly. "I get that you weren't inviting yourself. I'm inviting you, but if you're going to need to pack, we need to get going so that we can get there before dark."
A bright smile graced Maura's face, and Jane's heart melted.
"Alright, let me just send two emails, and then, we can go. Do you need to go back to your apartment, or did you already bring everything?"
"I'm packed," Jane said. "I traded vehicles with Tommy, so I have his truck. Oh, if you're going to come, I want to pick up one more thing. I'm going to leave now, and I'll meet you at your house, okay?"
"Okay," Maura agreed as she stood to return to her desk.
Jane jumped up from the couch with a renewed excitement. She couldn't believe her couture-loving, designer-brand-wearing best friend was coming camping with her. She couldn't wait.
Just as Jane reached the door, Maura called after her, "Jane?"
"Yeah?" Jane said, pausing in the doorway.
"Thank you."
Jane just smiled and waved as she walked out.
A/N: I actually wrote this camping story before The Adirondacks, and while it will have some smut, overall, the story has a very different tone than my other camping story.
Written based on a prompt from DirtyRobber.
