IWSC Writing School
Durmstrang, Y4
Conciseness and Commas
230 Words
AN Alternate Universe; Sentences are listed at the end
"Knock. Knock. May I come in?"
Winky startled, unused to wizards who asked her permission for anything.
"Of course, Harry Potter, sir! Is you needing anything from Winky?" The little elf made to put her bundle down but was stopped by the man.
"To be honest, I came to ask you the same thing as well as drop off…" In his hand was a pile of onesies each with mismatched socks sewn on the feet. Dobby would have loved it, so with a snap of the fingers, Baby Ibby was dressed in her newest outfit.
"Thank you, Harry Potter, sir. Your generosity…" Winky trailed off. The room was full of baby items, most coming from the man in front of her.
"Would you's like to hold her?" she offered.
Before the wizard could answer her, however, the infant popped herself onto his chest, forcing him to scramble in order to get a good hold of her. The babe, mischief-maker that she was, grinned as she floated his glasses onto her own tiny face. Winky felt faint at this turn of events, but Harry Potter's grin was reassuring.
Once Ibby fell asleep, Harry Potter handed her back.
"It's good hearing a baby's laughter. Try not to worry, Winky. I wouldn't do anything to destroy Ibby's innocence."
Staring into emerald-green eyes that reminded her of her mate's, Winky nodded with a smile.
Coordinating Conjunction
Winky felt faint after this turn of events, but Harry Potter's grin was reassuring.
Dependent Clause
Before the wizard could answer her, however, the infant popped herself onto his chest, forcing him to scramble in order to get a good hold of her.
Appositive
The babe, mischief-maker that she was, then proceeded to float his glasses onto her tiny face.
