I had fun writing this one because I couldn't help but make fun of the entire genre.


I, Shi Fen, am dying.

Quite simply, I was playing my favorite gacha game and didn't notice a car speeding through the stop light.

Reaching out for my phone I do... just one more pull!

Slamming the confirm on my single pull I blacked out before seeing the result, probably to never wake again.

"Shi Fen! Get up! One of the Sect Elders is a bad mood and wants to inspect the outer disciples!"

I reincarnated around 5 years ago almost to the day.

I woke up in the body of a 10 year old orphaned kid that just took the admission test for one of the local Orthodox Immortal Sects called "Invisible Storm Palace" with the Sect Ancestor being a Nascent Soul "Expert".

They are a pretty average mid-tier sect in this area based on information that I've been able to gather, with specializations in Sword Cultivation and Wind Element Techniques with some Lightning ones here and there.

At first, I was extremely excited. This was my time to dominate the realms and yadda yadda. Reality is cruel however.

No golden finger, no system, no heaven defying talent. At least so far.

I've been able to make use of my highschool education and understanding of science to improve some techniques to a degree.

It's been enough to trade for more resources but is really only supplementary in the end.

I've improved from Qi Gathering Stage 3 to Qi Gathering Stage 9 which is only above average for our sect.

In the 30 accepted disciples, 6 of them are now in Foundation Establishment while the rest are still in Qi Gathering.

The way that Orthodox Cultivation works in this world is the basic Qi Gathering, Foundation Establishment, Core Formation, Nascent Soul, etc as far as I know.

Not positive what comes after Nascent Soul as that is the highest in the region the sect is located.

There are other types of cultivation paths but they "go against the Heavens" and are hunted vehemently by the "Righteous".

Right, should probably get up for that inspection.

Standing up from my meditative position, I strap my standard issue sword to my waist, tie my hair up and leave my "house".

It's really more of a hut with a single room that had a meditation mat in the center of said room.

The Outer Sect accomodations are a joke, I've seen the ones the Inner Disciples get and they aren't much better.

"Brother Fen, you're alive! I swear, you stay cooped up there far to often. Soon you'll start growing mold."

"I don't wanna hear that from you Hou Shoushan. You can't sit still for more than thirty minutes yet somehow are just behind me in cultivation."

"It's my natural talent! That or my attitude. Why worry about longevity if you aren't spending that time correctly."

His boisterous and optimistic outlook are quite enviable. This dumbass is a guy that declared me his 'brother' after I explained to him what elements are.

I'm pretty sure he's from some secret clan or something too, but that's for another time.

"Yeah, yeah, your talent is really something. Anyways, which Elder is throwing a fit over his inadequacy this time? I hope it's not Shen Hai after getting rejected by Elder Wan again, that guy is simply embarrassing himself picking on his Juniors."

"Haha, you're hilarious Brother Fen! I am pretty sure it's him, guess you understand his character better than he does himself."

With a sigh at this waste of time, I ignore the smiling idiot beside me as we make our way to the Outer Lecture Hall where all these types of meeting take place.

Every since I reached the peak of Qi Gathering Stage 9, all Qi that I attempt to absorb simply disappears somewhere in my body.

I can only imagine it being my "cheat" and I have been obsessed with "awakening" it to the point of not even leaving my hut for a month now.

"So you think he'll single out that Yang Yongzheng guy again?"

That "Yang Yongzheng" guy he's referring to is who I am pretty sure is the protagonist of this world.

He was was originally the top disciple in our batch, went out on a sect mission, came back with a cultivation level that just keeps on decreasing regardless of how much effort he puts in, had a fiance that broke their family made engagement, etc.

The whole nine yards.

I'm positive he'll make a come back soon, probably get accused of unorthodox cultivation, he'll go on a rampage killing hundreds, pick up the dreaded country topping beauties like they are pebbles in a river, find secret techniques in areas that are considered "forbidden", etc.

I'm planning on being long gone from here by then. As amusing as it would see to watch these people get faceflapped, I don't want to be caught in the crossfire ultimately dying for the greed of the Elders.

Right, I should probably warn my... acquaintance? Yeah, acquaintance, Hou Shoushan to be careful.

"Obviously he'll single him out. He has done so the last three times he 'deigned' to be in our presence."

Reaching the Hall I can already see Shen Hai irately scowling at most of the disciples and fawning over a couple of promising ones.

Disgusting. I'm surprised someone like this has lived this long in this bloody and unreasonable world.

Wait, I've heard rumors of him having a brother that joined the strongest sect in the region.

It makes perfect sense.

After the protagonist commits his slaughter here, that strong brother will place a bounty on his head and send out disciples to act as grinding stones before he decides act himself.

Then the cycle repeats itself somewhere else or the author attempts to change the format with some other overused trope.

I bet that strong brother happens to know someone from another regions family that is looking for something in this "backwater" area.

I'm gonna puke from how cliche it is.

"You alright Brother Fen? You look like you just bit into a sour fruit."

"Yeah, just vainly hoping I'm not right about my future predictions this time around."

"Haha, you haven't been wrong so far Brother. Shockingly even with Yang Yongzheng's fiance joining the Emerald Palace. I wouldn't count on it."

"I know, that's why I'm planning on leaving the sect soon."

"What? But-"

"You two in the back! Stop whispering! We're starting the inspection."

A tall lankey man that I don't recognize in the slightest stepped forward from beside Shen Hai.

Let's just get this over with.

"We've gone through this multiple times, just hit this here Strength Tablet as hard as you can. It remembers your results from last time and compares the results. If it flashes with green light it means improvement, yellow means it's slight improvement, red means stagnation and deterioration."

He said that last bit while smirking towards a disciple I can't see from my position but can guess pretty easily.

"Disciple Fu Qingsheng. Strike the testing tablet."

"Yes! Boa Strike!"

Like a spring being uncoiled the burly looking disciple shot forward and slammed into the tablet with his fist.

Hm, it's a pretty dark green. Great improvement over just last time. Must've broke through realms and his improved his technique.

"Well done, if you keep up that pace you'll be an inner disciple in no time."

With that the testing went on and on while Shen Hai just had this lackey doing everything. I mean there are a few hundred outer disciples, it's absolute hell just standing here with nothing to do except exclaim in awe at other disciples. I refuse to do such a thing.

I had already gone with a light, almost yellow, green light flashing for me. That's fair. I haven't been working on my techniques for a while and my realm hit a bottleneck.

Hou Shoushan had also gone up and got a very dark green as usual. Kinda pisses me off seeing it. Maybe I shouldn't mention the impending massacre to him.

I'm not that vindictive, of course I'll mention it to someone who affectionately calls me "Brother".

The protagonist was set to go last. Whatever, might as well just cultivate in the meantime.

"I'm probably gonna regret this... Brother Hou, get my out of my meditative trance after the show is over. You'll know what I'm talking about when it happens."

Ugh, the way his eyes lit up at my acknowledgement of him being my brother makes me regret it even more.

"You got it Brother! I can't wait to see what you mean by show!"

With that I cut off my senses to the outside world and 'look' inwards exploring every aspect of my body looking for whatever keeps devouring the Qi I absorb.

Nothing. I still can't find where it goes. No matter what part of my body absorbs Qi above my limit it simply disappears without any trace.

Haaah, whatever. I'll just keep on going until my cheat decides to show itself. Then I'll leave this place before the protagonist decides to go on a killing spree.

I'll probably find some cave to hole up in for a while then come out once things settle down and find another sect to join.

--Scene skip because I don't feel like writing such a cliche scene-

"Brother Fen, it was amazing! You should've seen it!"

"I can guess it for the most part. That lackey that Shen Hai brought challenged Yang Yongzheng with the stipulation that if he loses he has to leave the sect. Then I suppose that Yang Yongzheng said it was unfair that their cultivations were too different not to mention there was nothing in it for him etc, they eventually start fighting after posturing like peacocks and Yang Yongzheng crushes him after showing off some weird technique even after the lackey stops suppressing his cultivation? Is that about right?"

By the look on his face I was dead on. Boring. I've seen that one done dozens of times. Why couldn't I have been reborn in a sci-fi universe? This place sucks and is way too predictable.

"Are you sure you were meditating Brother? How did you know exactly what happened? Can you see the future? Are you a Celestial that descended here to experience the life of a mortal?"

There he goes again. Might as well ignore him, he'll be at this for hours.

"Brother Hou, I'll be leaving first. Unlike you, I have to work hard for my cultivation."

With that I turned and directly left, missing the sad look that my friend sent my way.Now I'm back here 'home' meditating and slowly absorbing Qi.

I've been at this for hours. I pop a pill every hour that increases my cultivation speed slightly by expanding my mental power temporarily.

It causes fatique to build up faster but I can simply sleep it off later.

With that time passes. Hours turn into days and days turn into a week and half.

It was then that I felt the Qi I just absorbed circulate in my body's pathways slightly before vanishing again.

Finally! Maybe I can trace it now!

Attempting to follow it I focuses all my senses on a strand of Qi I just absorbed... Nope. It just vanishes.

It doesn't seem to like it is being pulled in any particular direction and just goes 'poof'. Gone.

Oh well, at least it seems to be getting full whatever it is. It's getting slower and slower on taking the Qi I absorb.

I assume that when I am fully able to refine a strand of Qi along my pathways that my cheat will be ready.

My five years of hard work will finally be worth it...Almost there... Yes!

Alright, cheat. Show yourself!

Uh cheat?

[Binding System...Success]

Oh good, I was getting worried for a second.

[To access the System, simply think about wanting to.]

That's kinda weird. It makes sense though, wouldn't want to just think "System" when you were just thinking about it and accidentally open it.

[Status]

[Skills]

[Inventory]

[Map]

[Shop]

[Quests]

Annnnd I stopped here.