"Daddy, we beat them!"
"That's a first." Indeed, it was. Normally, Striker, Maria, and Bombproof would've already met the other four at the parking lot. But this time, they hadn't even seen the van when they got there. They sure got lucky.
"When do you think they'll get here?" Maria asked curiously.
Sure enough, the sound of loud music coming their way answered that. Of course, knowing Blitz, it seemed natural for him to blast his radio at full volume, not to mention his reckless driving. Just as the van turned into the parking lot, however, a pink car suddenly came out of nowhere and went right into I.M.P.'s parking spot. When that happened, not only did the van skid into a stop, but Bombproof had reared up and neighed, freaked out.
"Whoa, whoa, easy boy! Easy!" Striker shouted as he and Maria held on for dear life. Luckily, Bombproof managed to calm down and allowed him to jump off his saddle, holding a trembling Maria in his arms. "Blitz, what's the big idea?!"
"Listen up, you unoriginal pink cum dump! You have three goddamn seconds to get your tits out of my parking spot!"
Striker turned towards who Blitz was shouting at through his megaphone only to see...
"Oh shit! Verosika!"
The succubus blew a bubble of pink gum which popped. "Blitzo."
"I should have known you'd be here. I could smell fish for miles, which is odd because I believe the nearest ocean is..." Blitz fell out of the van, faceplanting into the concrete, before he got up again. "Three rings down!"
"And I should have known you'd be here when I heard the Amber Alerts."
"Oh yeah? I'm surprised they let your fat ass out of rehab." Blitz sneered. "I can see you're still a drunken whore, clutching onto that Beelzejuice bottle like it's the last cock in hell!"
Verosika smirked, flicking her hair. "They let me off because I'm still famous and rehab is for sad, loser wash-ups." She took a drink from her flask, wiping away some that dripped off her lips. "So, your sister says hi."
"They know each other?" Maria asked looking at her dad.
"Seems that way, sweetheart." Striker shrugged.
Next thing they both knew, Verosika walked right up to them. "Well, well, well, what a fine piece of work you have over here."
Striker swore she seemed to be eyeing him up and down behind her sunglasses. He made sure to hold Maria, who was starting to get nervous, close to him while keeping his free hand on the holster of his pistol. Having dealt with succubi before, he knew very well about their seductive mannerisms, so better to be safe than sorry.
"Hmm, I have to say, I've never seen such a hot and sexy cowboy like you before." Verosika purred, leaning down towards him a little too close for comfort. "And with such charming, hypnotic eyes too. I absolutely admire that in a man."
"Don't get any ideas, woman." Striker stood his ground, despite her towering over him. "As much as I appreciate the compliments, my heart already belongs to someone else."
"It does? That's a shame, you certainly look like you could use a lady." Then she looked at Maria. "Oh, and who's this little cutie? Is she yours?"
"Yes, she is my daughter." Striker hissed, his tail rattling.
"Aww, how sweet." Verosika cooed suddenly touching Maria's cheek, making her shiver. "I see you have your daddy's eyes. And you just like him."
"Th-th-thanks." Maria whimpered uncomfortably.
Striker almost looked ready to snap her neck in two by now. Luckily, Blitz came in between them. "Why are you parking here?! This is the only parking spot my company has! So, take your tampon race car somewhere else!"
"Actually, prick, it has my name on it." Verosika smirked, pointing to the ground. Her name was written there in cursive letters with purple spray paint while I.M.P. had been crossed out. "I'm doing a bit of freelance for one of the infinitely more successful companies in the building."
While the two argued, Striker, still holding his daughter, made his way over to the van. Maria was more than relieved to be away from that succubus.
"Who is that creepy lady anyway?" she murmured. Loona blinked and looked at her in shock. "Wait, you've never heard of Verosika Mayday?!"
"Not really." Maria shook her head.
"Hold on!" Blitz's shout stopped Loona from speaking further as he was now following Verosika past them. "You better move that pussy wagon right now or I'm gonna..."
A muscular male hellhound suddenly appeared behind him and growled. "You'll what?"
"Or I'll... uhh... uhh, I'll call HR!"
Suddenly, the three of them laughed like the audience of a sitcom.
"Anyway, meet my new hellhound, Vortex. Unlike you, he actually does his job well." Verosika and Vortex walked away, the former flipping the bird at Blitz. "Ta-ta, fuck stain."
"Ugh, I wasted so much time with a bag of holes like that."
Loona then stepped out of the van. "You know Verosika Mayday?!"
"Huh? Oh yeah, her, yeah. We dated."
Striker and Maria both blinked in surprise at this.
"Was it before or after she became a popstar?" Millie asked, Moxxie adding, "You dated a popstar?!"
"Okay, why are you all acting like that's such a shock?"
"Hello, it's Verosika Mayday?" Loona spoke.
"It's you?" Striker added dryly.
"I just... Is she blind? Suffering some form of brain damage?"
Blitz rolled his eyes. "Okay, look, you are all making this into a way bigger deal then it needs to be. I don't pry into your stupid personal lives."
"You do that all the time, sir!"
"Come on, you kinda do that."
"You totally do that."
"Do I need to remind you how many times I nearly shot you sneaking into my house?!" Striker snapped.
"And all the times you popped up in my room?!" Maria added.
"What was sex with her like?"
"MILLIE!" Striker could not have been more relieved with Moxxie covering Maria's ears.
"Eww, gross!"
On their way up to settle things with Verosika, Maria learned the reason she was so mad Blitz involved him "borrowing" her credit cards and car and going to Wrath for horse riding lessons leaving her at the hotel! No wonder she hates his guts! As it also turned out, she and her group of succubi had occupied the office right across from I.M.P. for a week.
Right now, her, Blitz, and Loona were waiting in the hall after Moxxie volunteered to reason with the succubus. Striker had gone into their office to fetch something Maria could use for target practice. It hadn't even been a minute when Moxxie suddenly came out, battered and shaken with lipstick kisses all over his face.
"Moxxie?! Are you okay?" Maria asked worried.
"I... I gotta go lie down... now." Moxxie faceplanted onto the ground.
Oh man, was Blitz beyond pissed. "Oh, this won't STAND!"
He realized too late that in his rage, he'd accidentally shoved Maria into the door, right inside the other office. Shit, Striker's so gonna kill me!
"Well, well, what have we got here?"
Maria gulped as she was now surrounded by the succubi, who were starting gather around her.
"Oh, excuse me." the impling said meekly, trying to back away. "I... I didn't mean to..."
"Oh my God, she's so cute! I could just eat her up!"
"Want a kiss, cutie pie?"
"Uh, actually, I really should be going."
"Now, now, don't be shy, sweetie. I don't bite... much." Verosika suddenly walked right up to Maria, trapping her against the wall. She shuddered as the lead succubus put a finger under her chin, lifting her head up. "How about you stay a while and we can get to know each other?"
"I got a better idea." Verosika turned and saw Striker standing behind her aiming his blessed pistol at her, his expression dark. "How about you get your damn filthy hands off my baby girl before I put a bullet in-between your eyes?"
The rest of the succubi looked scared at the sight of the weapon. Verosika, however smirked and turned her attention to him. While she was distracted, Maria ran behind her dad who immediately wrapped an arm around her.
"You wouldn't really shoot little old me in front of your baby girl, now would you, cowboy?" she asked, running a finger down the line of his neck. "You might be setting the both of us a bad example."
Striker now had the end of his pistol right at her throat, his grip on it firm.
"Try me." he sneered.
Verosika smirked and backed off. "I have to say, cowboy, I'm impressed. How about we have a little wager? A demon duel, if you will?"
Striker raised an eyebrow. "I'm listening."
"Here's the deal. I bet you and Blitzo's little posse can't off as many people as we can fuck by the end of the day." Verosika came right up in his face as she talked. "If you win, you get the parking spot back. But if I win, I get to do whatever I want to you and your baby girl."
Maria whimpered, pressing herself in Striker's grip as he held her close to him.
"So, do we have a deal, cowboy?"
Striker hissed, but reluctantly replied, "Game on, bitch."
"Alright, shut your assholes! Here's how we're gonna do this shit! First, we find a fuck ton of clients..." Neither Striker nor Maria paid any attention to Blitz's rambling as the former was polishing his blessed rifle while the latter had been playing with her skirt, still shaken from what happened earlier.
"So, heard you got a little action with those guys, real nice." Loona said quietly yet smugly.
"Leave it alone, I don't wanna talk about it." Maria hissed through her teeth.
"What? I'm just saying that was a pretty bold move, that's all."
"I said drop it!"
"Hey, no need to get so damn snippy, termite!"
"Stop calling me that!"
"Enough, both of you!" Striker hissed, making Maria flinch while Loona just rolled her eyes.
"Whatever. Anyway, is there a way I can come with you guys this time?"
Blitz frowned. "Absolutely not, I forbid it. Not gonna happen. Sorry sweetie, spring break is no place for young, vulnerable goth girls. You know the kind of FREAKS up there who'd drool all over you!"
"Well, I can blend in with the humans easily enough. Just let me tag along."
"Wait, say that again."
"I can blend in...?"
"Hold up, do you have a human disguise?" Striker asked genuinely intrigued.
"Yeah, don't you?" Loona looked at the four as if they'd each grown a second head. "Wait a minute, you four have been screwing around this whole fucking time without human disguises?!"
"Why would they need them?" Maria asked.
"Sheesh, you really are thick, termite. To put it bluntly, we're not allowed to be seen in our actual forms."
Maria rolled her eyes, but said nothing. She never understood why Loona didn't like her ever since she and her dad joined the company, maybe she never will.
"Okay, new plan!" Blitz placed a new scribbled drawing on the whiteboard. "Loonie can help lure the humans to us and we'll take care of the rest. Okay, how about that?"
"Flawless logic." Millie smirked.
"I think you're missing the biggest issue, sir." Moxxie pointed out. "Isn't it crucial to have a client who demands enough kills to win this bet?"
"Moxxie's got a point, Blitz." Striker added. "Where are we even gonna find that many clients in so little time?"
"I got that covered, fellas."
All it took was a crudely drawn flyer, but they managed to get a whole lot of clients. Now, everyone was at a beach in the human world where it looked like there was a party going on. Maria wound up coming too, mainly because Striker didn't have time to find someone to watch her. She ended up having to watch the action from under a pier, not that she minded. Plus, she had to admit Loona looked really lovely in her human disguise.
But anyway, Loona simply lured the select humans some place where the others would kill them without being seen. During this time, Striker had resorted to using his angelic rifle on the targets. Clearly, he was still on edge from what happened between him and Verosika. Maria couldn't really blame him; having been there, she understood how he felt.
By evening, the adults already killed fourteen people and were now stuffing them into bags.
CRASH!
Okay, make that fifteen, thanks to a broken bottle thrown unintentionally by Maria.
"Damn, kiddo, not bad for your first kill!" Blitz laughed.
"But, I didn't even do that on purpose." Maria said sheepishly.
"You sure impressed me, princess." Striker ruffled her head. "I think we'll make a killer out of you yet."
"Thanks, daddy. Do you think we might be able to-"
"Alright, spring breakers!" A familiar voice spoke from the nearby stage and sure enough, Verosika came out of the pink smoke in her own human disguise. "Y'all ready to get fucked up and make some bitchin' bad choices?!"
The humans cheered wildly as she began to sing. Maria noticed they started to act... well, for a lack of better words, odd.
"What are they doing?" Moxxie quickly covered her eyes, much to Striker's relief. "Maria, don't look at this!"
"Goddammit! That bitch started her goadish mating call! Now she's gonna win all these sex maniacs! We gotta pick things up, guys!" Blitz pointed to a vomiting human. "Is he on the list, Loonie?"
"Huh? Yeah... I-I think so." Loona wasn't really paying attention, instead looking at Vortex. Blitz cleaved the human's skull anyway.
"Alright, next one, Loonie, come on... Loonie? Wait, where-" Blitz suddenly realized Loona had disappeared and panicked. "Where's my baby?!"
"Uh, Blitz..." Maria pointed to Loona approaching Vortex.
"Huh, would you look at that." Striker said smugly.
"Laugh now, cowboy, that's gonna be your daughter in ten years." Blitz sneered which made Striker nearly fall over in shock.
"And... we've lost him." Moxxie sighed as Blitz stomped towards the hellhounds. "It's looking like it's up to us to handle this list."
"Hell yeah! Team MMn'S getting shit done, makin' the money!" Millie cheered.
"Maria, you go see if you can help Blitz out while we're gone." The impling shrugged. "Well... I'll try."
Striker kissed her cheek. "That's my girl. See you in a bit."
With that, he, Moxxie, and Millie went to go kill some more people on their list. While they did so, Maria made her way to Blitz and Loona, who were now arguing.
"Blitz, Loona, are you guys okay?" she asked them.
"Maria, what are you doing here?" Blitz asked, surprised to see her.
"Daddy asked me to help you guys. So, what's going on here?"
"I just wanted to see what was so important that Loona would be distracted from her job." Blitz spoke.
"What, I can't have a break?"
"We have a parking spot on the line!"
"Blitz, Loona, calm down." Maria got in-between them. "Everybody's looking at us."
"Will you stay out this, you nosy little termite?! It's none of your damn business!" Loona snapped at her.
"Now hold it, Loona, Maria is just as much part of this as we all are! She has the right!"
"No, she doesn't! Why do you all keep defending her?! She's always in everybody's way! I bet that's why she doesn't even have a mom, she probably died cause she was sick of her!"
Maria had a stunned and hurt look on her face, her eyes welled with tears. Without a word, she ran back towards the pier. Both Loona and Blitz watched in shock.
Striker was about to shoot another target from behind a beer barrel when he saw Maria run past him in tears.
"Maria? Baby girl, what's wrong?" he called, but she'd already run to rocks under the pier to cry. He guessed right away it had something to do with Blitz and Loona and made a mental note to give that hellhound a talking to later. Right now, he had to go find his daughter.
"We got another one!" Before Striker could even run, one of the humans grabbed him by the tail.
"Hey, hands off the merchandise!" Too late, he was thrown inside a beer barrel and ended up gulping down its contents while being tossed around in it.
Maria, meanwhile, had been crying for a while when she felt something lightly touch her foot. She saw it was her dad's rifle, but what was it doing here? Daddy always held onto his weapons whenever he used them. She then saw two beer barrels wobble, came over, and opened one while Millie appeared and did the same with another. Sure enough, two familiar imps came spilling out along with what remained of the alcohol, both of them heavily drunk.
"Moxxie!"
"Daddy!"
"Millieeeeeeeee! Hiiii!" Moxxie blurted out. "Hey, when did you get four heads? I wanna kiss 'em!"
"H-H-Hi... Hiya, baby doll." Striker's words slurred. "Did you do something with your hair? Looks mighty pretty."
Maria forgot what she'd been sad about earlier and blinked in confusion. "Daddy? Are you okay?"
"Who, me? Sure I am, never felt..." Striker hiccupped. "...Better."
"Uh, Millie, what's happening here?"
Millie looked unsure how to respond, Maria was only six after all. "Let's just say that stuff they drank is messin' with their heads."
"Okay... but what is it?"
"Uhh... it's best you don't know..."
Suddenly, something burst up from out of the ocean. The female imps turned and saw a huge fish-like monster, which sent the humans running and screaming while Striker and Moxxie, in their drunk states, look unfazed.
"Ooooh! Fish." Moxxie was suddenly grabbed by the monster's tongue which pulled him into its mouth.
"Maria, stay with your daddy, I'll handle this!"
"Be careful, Millie!"
Millie then stabbed a nearby human and used his shirt and bottle to make a Molotov cocktail, which she threw at the monster. The explosion knocked the mutant fish back into the water and Millie swam over and dug her knife into its hide as it stood up, prying its mouth open. Maria, holding onto her dad, watched as Moxxie suddenly came flying out of the creature's mouth and landed in Blitz's arms.
"I love that woman." he said, his tail forming a heart.
"Oh, she totally pegs you, doesn't she?" Blitz smirked.
A few minutes later, the monster fell dead into the ocean and Millie swam back to shore, panting heavily.
"Oh yeah, way to show off, Mils!" Blitz cheered.
"Are Mox and Striker okay?" Millie asked.
"Still looking and talking funny, but they're alright." Maria said.
Blitz dropped Moxxie to the ground and Millie came over and hugged him, happily laughing.
"Woooow, this is nice!" Striker spoke in his drunken state. "I feel like I'm on fire!"
Maria couldn't help but giggle as she hugged her dad.
"Aww, you two look so cute right now!" Blitz smiled brightly at the father-daughter duo. The moment didn't last long as Verosika and her crew approached them.
"That was handled rather... obvious, don't you think?" she snarked at them.
"I don't think this belonged to any of us." Millie piped up, holding up a black and silver flask with pink hearts on it before she tossed it to Verosika, who caught it. "Would be a shame if anyone found out you guys were behind a giant monster fish in the human world."
"Oh Satan! Y'all are gonna get so... fucked!" Striker let out a hysterical laugh.
Verosika looked stunned, realizing they were right, but made an effort to fight back. "Yeah, well... you five nasty-ass gremlins will be in shit for not being in disguises!"
"A human called me a possum. I am not a possum!" Moxxie somewhat hissed before he faceplanted into the sand.
"Y'know, we could keep this little B-movie scene on the down low if you agree to let us use that parking space." Blitz smirked. Maria wanted so badly to laugh at the scowl on Verosika's face. The succubus knew right away she'd been beat. "...Fine."
"Yes! We did it!" Maria cheered along with the others. "In your face, pinky!"
With that, everyone (Loona trailing behind them rather glumly for some reason) went back to celebrate their victory. However, once they returned, Maria realized something: how was she gonna get her dad to ride or even get on Bombproof in his drunk state?
Okay, just a head's up, I do NOT ship Striker and Verosika. Yes, she might've felt attracted to him (I mean, come on, who doesn't? This is Striker we're talking about), but nothing more. Plus, the way she acted to Maria is a HUGE no-no in his mind.
