So here's what you missed on GLEE: Blaine and Kurt are developing a new musical, and Blaine stayed in the city to begin a small workshop of the project. Tina moved to New York to try one last time to make her dreams come true. Rachel won a Tony award back in 2020 for Jane Austen Sings, but now people are saying her performance is old and that the show's about to be canceled. Kitty works at the Spotlight Diner with her roommate, a Turkish girl named Ameera, and the Gerber Baby Harmony, her arch-nemesis - things get pretty nasty at work. Jake and his roommate Mena are teachers at a youth performing arts studio, owned by the husband of Kitty's abusive diner manager, Mandy.
EXT. NEW YORK CITY - WEDNESDAY, JANUARY 19, 2022 - NOON
It was like a scene out of a fever dream. It was 21st century hustling and bustling New York, yet, the way some people were dressed around these parts, you'd think we were back in the Revolutionary War.
Suddenly, Jake came bursting out of a subway station, rapping and dancing hip-hop through the streets. Rachel, Blaine, Kitty, Mena, Harmony, Brandon, Mandy, and several other singing and dancing citizens surrounded him in the streets.
Song: "The Schuyler Sisters" from Hamilton
Jake: There's nothing rich folks love more
Than going downtown and slummin' it with the poor
They pull up in their carriages and gawk
At the students in the common just to watch 'em talk
Suddenly, out of the subway station walked Mercedes, Brittany, and Sugar.
Take Philip Schuyler, the man is loaded
Uh-oh, but little does he know
That his daughters, Peggy, Angelica, Eliza
Sneak into the city just to watch all the guys at-
Mercedes (Citizens): (Work, work!) Angelica!
Brittany: (Work, work!) Eliza!
Sugar: And Peggy! (Work, work!)
(The Schuyler sisters!)
Mercedes: Angelica!
Sugar: Peggy!
Brittany: Eliza! (Work!)
Sugar: Daddy said to be home by sundown
Mercedes: Daddy doesn't need to know
Sugar: Daddy said not to go downtown
Brittany: Like I said, you're free to go
Mercedes: But look around, look around
The revolution's happening in New York (Brittany/Sugar: New York)
Brittany: Angelica, remind me what we're looking for
Mena/Men: She's lookin' for me!
Mercedes: Eliza, I'm lookin' for a mind at work (work)
I'm lookin' for a mind at work (work)
I'm lookin' for a mind at work (work)
Whoa-ooh, whoa-oh-oh
Mercedes/Brittany/Sugar: Whoa-ooh, whoa-oh-oh (work!)
Jake: Whoo! There's nothin' like summer in the city
Someone in a rush next to someone lookin' pretty
Excuse me, miss, I know it's not funny
But your perfume smells like your daddy's got money
Why you slummin' in the city in your fancy heels?
You searchin' for an urchin who can give you ideals?
Mercedes: Burr, you disgust me
Jake: Ah, so you've discussed me
I'm a trust fund, baby, you can trust me
Mercedes: I've been reading "Common Sense" by Thomas Paine
So men say that I'm intense or I'm insane
You want a revolution? I want a revelation
So listen to my declaration
Mercedes/Brittany/Sugar: "We hold these truths to be self-evident
That all men are created equal"
Mercedes: And when I meet Thomas Jefferson (unh!)
I'ma compel him to include women in the sequel (work!)
Brittany: Look around, look around
At how lucky we are to be alive right now
Brittany/Sugar: Look around, look around
At how lucky we are to be alive right now
Mercedes/Brittany/Sugar: History is happening in Manhattan
And we just happen to be in the greatest city in the world
In the greatest city in the world!
Mercedes (Brittany/Sugar): 'Cause I've been reading "Common Sense" by Thomas Paine (look around, look around)
So men say that I'm intense or I'm insane (the revolution's happening in New York)
You want a revolution? I want a revelation (look around, look around, New York)
So listen to my declaration (it's happening)
Mercedes/Brittany/Sugar (Citizens): We hold these truths to be self-evident (look around, look around)
That all men are created equal (at how lucky we are to be alive right now)
All: Look around, look around
At how lucky we are to be alive right now
History is happening in Manhattan
And we just happen to be in the greatest city in the world (in the greatest city)
In the greatest city in the world!
Mercedes: Angelica!
Brittany: (Work, work!) Eliza!
Sugar: And Peggy! (Work, work!)
Mercedes/Brittany/Sugar: The Schuyler sisters! (Work, work!)
We're looking for a mind at work! (Work, work!)
Brittany/Sugar: Hey! (Work, work!)
Hey! (Work, work!) (Mercedes: Woah)
Hey! (Work, work!)
Mercedes/Brittany/Sugar: In the greatest city (work! Work!)
In the greatest city in the world (In the greatest city in the world!)
EXT. RICHARD RODGERS THEATRE - LATE AFTERNOON
Mercedes, Sugar, Brittany, and Tina exited a matinee performance of Hamilton.
"That was the most fun I've had in so long!" Mercedes exclaimed.
"I'm so glad we got to share this experience together," Tina said, almost tearfully.
"Yeah, it was a great show, though I do want to point out a historical inaccuracy that the Schuyler sisters weren't actually the only three daughters of Phillip Schuyler," Brittany began lecturing.
"What?" Sugar asked, shocked. "You mean Angelica didn't need to marry rich in London after all?"
"What an outrage; she could've had that man!" Mercedes joked.
"Brittany, all of a sudden you know history too, now?" Tina asked.
"Eh, the kitten Tubbingtons have a newfound attraction for the History Channel," Brittany explained.
"Come on, girls, let's go find a place to eat!" Sugar exclaimed.
INT. SPOTLIGHT DINER
The four girls entered the Spotlight Diner, and noticed Rachel and Blaine already seated at one of the center tables, with a 4-person booth open right next to them.
"Oh, we're with them," Mercedes said to the hostess, who beckoned for them to join their friends.
"What are you guys doing here?" Tina asked.
"Just catching a quick bite before I head over to my night performance," Rachel said. "Are you folks going to come see?"
"Ah, see, we would, but–" Mercedes began.
"Jane Austen Sings is old news," Sugar said bluntly.
Rachel gasped.
"I won't even blame the Asperger's for that one," Sugar said, sipping her cup of water that just got delivered to her table.
"Well, I guess I should be polite and ask what you two are doing here, Brittany and Sugar?" Blaine asked.
"Oh, well, so you know how the Ellen DeGeneres show was canceled?" Brittany asked.
"Oh no, what did she say to annoy the woke police?" Rachel asked sarcastically.
"Oh no, like, the show just aged and died and got canceled," Brittany explained. "Anyway, Ellen saw one of my viral Lord Tubbington videos and I got invited to one of her last shows, and she gave me a $10,000 cash prize, and when she realized how funny I was, she gave me all her production staff. But, I told her that my wife is a detective based in upstate New York, but apparently she knew a whole bunch of people here in NYC, so yeah, we're taping my Pilot episode this week!"
"Wow, that's amazing!" Blaine and Rachel said together, almost with disbelief.
"Yeah, and so I was hoping, that the Tony-winning Rachel Berry and Grammy-less Mercedes Jones would be willing to make a guest appearance?" Brittany asked.
"I'd be honored!" Rachel said, at the same time as Mercedes spat, "Grammy-less?"
"Great," Brittany said, flagging the waitress down to take her order.
"So, Tina, how you liking working here?" Mercedes asked.
"Not well," Tina whimpered. "Our manager, Ms. Rosario, is a nightmare."
"Even worse than Sue Sylvester?" Mercedes asked.
"Well, nightmare in different ways," Tina sighed. "I think Kitty and Harmony are actually supposed to start their shift for the dinner rush soon."
"Well, I'll take that as my cue to make my exit," Rachel said, slinging her purse over her should and leaving a tip on the table.
"Why?" Brittany asked.
"Ever since Blaine cast both Harmony and Kitty in his little workshop thing, those two have been hurling insults at each other like North and South Korea," Tina muttered.
"Hey, we need Kitty's dancing ability, and we need Harmony's voice," Blaine said.
"What about my voice?" Tina asked, disappointed.
"Aww, Queen T, it's not about your voice, it's–" Blaine began stammering.
"Yeah, I'mma go ahead and order before y'all both start a fight amongst yourselves too," Mercedes said. "Have a wonderful show, Rachel, and I'll see you at your next rehearsal, Blaine!"
Like clockwork, not long after Rachel and Blaine exited the diner, Kitty and Harmony made separate entrances into the diner, clocking in and donning their aprons.
"This is definitely going to be awkward," Tina sighed. "I just started working here too and I already feel like I'm getting caught in their crossfires. It's deadly. I can't imagine what going to school at NYADA with them would've felt like."
"Ooh, Kurt used to tell me stories from when Kitty was a freshman during his and Rachel's senior year up at that school," Mercedes said. "Apparently they did Evita their senior year, and of course we all know Rachel ended up playing Eva Peron, but Harmony was only a sophomore and she got cast as the mistress. Now, allegedly, during one show one of Harmony's props went missing, and because they had a silly little rivalry happening in Cassandra July's dance class, Harmony framed Kitty for stealing the prop."
"And we all know the number one rule in theatre – never touch anyone else's props," Tina said.
"Then what happened?' Sugar asked, enthralled in the conflict.
"Well, what Kurt told me was that because so many of the NYADA faculty saw how nasty Kitty could be, they totally believed Harmony, and kicked Kitty out of the production. And by then, Kitty was only a freshman but a very featured dancer in that cast. Then, a techie from the production team came forward and said that they were the one that had accidentally misplaced the prop, not Kitty. So the NYADA faculty called them in for some meeting, Kitty didn't accept anyone's apology, and held a grudge against Harmony ever since."
"But why does Kitty hate the Gerber Baby in the first place?" Brittany asked.
"I mean, I'm sure the drama school rivalries result in a lot of tension and jealousy, but I don't know," Mercedes said.
"Maybe a boy," Sugar guessed.
The silence was broken when dishes clattered to the ground. Harmony and Kitty had accidentally bumped into each other while carrying dirty dishes back to the kitchen.
"Watch where you're going," Kitty hissed.
"I yelled 'corner' before you even got here," Harmony said, while on her knees re-stacking plates. "You just weren't paying attention."
"Kitty, Harmony, quit the arguing and get the 6:00 showstopper started," Mandy barked from the kitchen.
Song: "What is this Feeling" from Wicked
[Kitty:]
What is this feeling
So sudden and new?
[Harmony:]
I felt the moment
I laid eyes on you
[Kitty:]
My pulse is rushing
[Harmony:]
My head is reeling
[Kitty:]
My face is flushing
[Both:]
What is this feeling?
Fervid as a flame
Does it have a name?
Yes
Loathing
Unadulterated loathing
[Kitty:]
For your face
[Harmony:]
Your voice
[Kitty:]
Your clothing
[Both:]
Let's just say - I loathe it all
Though I do admit it came on fast
Still I do believe that it can last
And I will be loathing, loathing you
My whole life long
[Waiters/Waitresses:]
Dear Galinda, you are just too good
How do you stand it? I don't think I could
She's a terror! She's a tartar
We don't mean to show a bias
But Galinda you're a martyr
[Kitty:]
Well, these things are sent to try us
[Waiters/Waitresses:]
Poor Galinda forced to reside
With someone so disgusting-I-fied
We just want to tell you
We're all on your side
We share your
As Kitty's fellow waiters lifted her into the air, it was apparent to Tina, Mercedes, Brittany, and Sugar that the whole diner staff seemed to have taken Kitty's side against Harmony.
[Kitty/Harmony (WaitersWaitresses):]
(Loathing) What is this feeling
So sudden and new? (Unadulterated loathing)
I felt the moment (For her face, her voice, her clothing)
I laid eyes on you
My pulse is rushing (Let's just say)
My head is reeling (We loathe it all)
Oh, what is this feeling? (Every little trait, however small))
Does it have a name? (Makes our very flesh Begin to crawl)
Yes
[All:]
Ahhhhhh
Loathing
[Kitty and Harmony (Waiters/Waitresses):]
There's a strange exhilaration (loathing)
In such total detestation (loathing)
It's so pure, so strong! (so strong)
Though I do admit it came on fast
Still I do believe that it can last
And I will be loathing (loathing...)
For forever loathing (loathing...)
Truly deeply
Loathing you (loathing you!...
My whole life long
[Waiters/Waitresses:]
Loathing
Unadulterated loathing
[Harmony:]
Boo
[Screams - Kitty:]
Ah!
When Harmony scared Kitty, it brought a whole other tray of dirty dashes crashing down to the floor. Kitty glared at Harmony furiously. Mandy marched up over to the two girls. "I asked for a 6:00 show-stopping number, NOT a diva-off. I hope to god these customers think you two are just really good actresses, because your pissy little attitudes would really drive any reasonable customers out of his establishment. If you two can't find a way to put your differences aside and work together–"
"Save it," Harmony said. "I'll shut up and mind my business. Just don't run into me again."
Kitty rolled her eyes and picked up the dishes off the ground.
"Good," Mandy said. "Don't let me catch the two of you pulling this crap in here every again, you got that?"
The four girls awkwardly looked down as they watched the interaction conclude.
"That was nuts," Mercedes said.
"Very," Tina whispered.
INT. NYADA THEATRE - THU, JAN. 20 - AFTERNOON
Blaine walked into the theater flanked by Jake, Mercedes, and Tina.
"I still think you made a huge mistake," Tina said bitterly.
"Tina, I don't want to rehash this argument for the fifth time," Blaine said.
"It just doesn't sit right with me that Harmony is the one playing Alex when someone else clearly sung that song way better than her," Tina said.
"He sung it down an octave; that's a cheat," Blaine replied.
"Him belting an F4 as a bass is just as impressive as Harmony belting an F4 as a mezzo soprano," Tina debated.
"Blaine, Brandon's voice was one of the most beautiful things–" Mercedes began.
"The role of Grey doesn't need to be beautiful," Blaine said. "He's flawed, torn, full of despair."
"Dude, I have to agree with the girls," Jake said. "I felt for the guy when he was talking about transposing keys and stuff. Ryder and I were the baritones in Glee Club. You don't think I had times where I wished we could drop the song a key or two? I know I was the dancer, but you don't think I wondered if maybe we could've had a chance to sing at nationals if the songs weren't just for tenors like you, Artie, and Sam?"
"Jake's got a point," Mercedes said. "Look, I had to be grateful that my park-and-bark belt even got a foot through the door with Rachel and Mr. Schue in most of our setlists; otherwise I don't think I would've been given a standout part in half the songs we did in glee club."
"Yeah, look at me," Tina said. "I couldn't belt as high as either of you, and my first solo at a competition was freaking 'Gangnam Style.'"
"Look, I like the people that I chose for this cast, and I'm not budging," Blaine concluded.
Momentarily, Blaine's cast filed in for rehearsal. The female cast consisted of Kitty, Tina, Harmony, and three white girls. The male cast consisted of the Egyptian-American Mena, and five white guys.
"Hello to the cast of The Fork in the Road!" Blaine greeted. "Congratulations to all of you on a job well done at auditions. I'm elated to have such an impressive, talented, diverse cast laid out in front of me."
"Diverse?" Mercedes whispered to Jake from the audience. "He literally has Tina the Token Asian and Mena the Token Brown Boy. And not a single plus-sized one in the bunch."
"Now, The Fork in the Road was inspired by a certain time in the lives of myself and my husband, Kurt Hummel," Blaine narrated. "In the Spring of 2014, eight years ago, we and a bunch of our friends were living here in New York City. Underdogs from Ohio trying to chase the spotlight. Various kinds of spotlight - film, modeling, Broadway, TV. And also, the spotlight cast down upon us of our relationships. The heavy ups and downs, the uncertainty, the arguments, the not knowing who we were or who we'd become. By the end of that spring, we all dispersed. Some staying in New York, some going off to LA, some going back to Ohio. Some continuing on their same professions and studies and some taking some weird 180's. The fork in the road of young adults is a story that we can all relate to, and we hope that this is a story that can one day take its footing on the great white way. And the twelve of you, are that first step to making this dream come true. Now, today, we're going to start off with choreographer to one of the first big dance numbers of the show: 'Love Wildly.' This song is sung by our male lead, Grey, played by the wonderful Mena Hassan. He's a gay somewhat in the closet, realizing that he has so much love to give, rather than hiding behind walls and not loving at all. Jake? Take it away."
Jake began leading the cast through this first combo. Blaine would chip away at the piano while Mercedes would occasionally drop in and give vocal advice to the performers.
Song: "Love Wildly" by Joey Contreras
Mena: Hoo-hoo
Oh, you're gonna get me in trouble,
I've got an addictive personality
But, oh, I think I wanna see
Just how bad you may be for me
'Cause what's the point of livin' if you're too afraid to let yourself go?
I'm ready to experience all that you're willin' to give and show
Hey, let's get a little crazy!
And live it up, give this a try!
You could break my heart tomorrow, baby,
But today I wanna feel ali-i-i-ive
Here's a chance to have a moment
Somethin' new, big or small,
'Cause I would rather love wildly than not love at all
Oh!
Oh, yeah!
Yeah,
Hey, let's get a little crazy!
You could break my heart tomorrow, baby,
But today I wanna feel alive!
Here's a chance to have a moment
Somethin' new, big or small,
'Cause I would rather love wildly
Than not love at all
The cast and creatives applauded as Mena finished off the number.
"Whoo!" Mercedes cheered. "Mena, I know you said in your audition that you ain't much of a singer, but MAN you SLAYED those riffs!"
"And Mena, your chemistry with Andrew, I almost thought you were a real homosexual!" Blaine laughed.
"Straight as an arrow, but when there's a story to tell, a good actor can kiss anyone," Mena said with supreme confidence. Unbeknownst to anyone, Kitty was really impressed. Though she had worked with Mena for a while and had seen his acting projects since his days in Juilliard, Mena had a much more newfound sense of confidence about him.
"Alright, everyone, let's go ahead and take five, and then we'll come back and fine tune the chorus parts," Blaine instructed.
As Jake was returning to his seat, he noticed Harmony struggling with some self stretches. He knelt down and asked, "Need a hand?"
Harmony bit her bottom lip and nodded. "Sure."
Jake began tilting her back forward, allowing her to deepen her stretch. Harmony breathed out a sigh of relief.
"Been a while since I was even close to this flexible," Harmony laughed. "I should probably get back into dance classes more often, or even like yoga or something."
"Yeah, it's important to keep everything loose," Jake laughed. "They do a pretty cool Young Adult Contemporary class at the studio I work at, if you ever maybe wanna take a lesson with me. Word is I may be teaching it next summer."
"Oh yeah?" Harmony asked impressively. "I just may have to consider that."
Jake chuckled. "Well, looks like you got it under control. I'll see you later, Harmony."
Harmony smiled and waved as Jake went to hydrate. Kitty was not pleased at this interaction. She marched over to Harmony, and plied down to her level. "Watch out for that one," she said. "That womanizer has a longstanding history of wrecking hearts, and despite the fact that I don't particularly like you, I wouldn't want to see you get hurt like I've seen my friends get hurt."
Harmony's smile vanished. "I think I can take care of myself, thanks."
Kitty smirked and stood up and returned to stretch with the other three girls.
Afar, Mena sat down next to Jake. "Dude, what was that about? Did you finally score a date with the blue-eyed beauty?"
"She's not just a blue-eyed beauty," Jake laughed. "And no, I did not score a date; I just helped her stretch."
"Mmm, sounds pretty erotic," Mena teased. "You should go for it, dude. Just sayin'."
Jake shook his head and playfully punched Mena in the arm. "Get back to rehearsal, roomie." Mena stood up and rejoined the rest of the cast on stage. Since they were now working on music at the piano with Blaine, Jake put in a set of airpods and leaned back to relax.
There was a lot running through his head: making sure that he was picking up enough work to be able to afford the apartment in the city, worrying about his mom back home who was struggling to make financial ends meet herself, worrying about being able to juggle all these choreographer gigs, and one thing that he never really expressed to anyone, was just sheer loneliness. Even at the age of 24, Jake was now watching plenty of his high school classmates getting married, or having kids, or both, and even though Jake was pretty good about working at his own pace and timeline, he couldn't deny that it made him a little jealous.
To be clear, Jake's womanizer days were long over, pretty much since the pregnancy scare with Bree their sophomore year. Jake tried dating a bit throughout college, but nothing ever quite stuck, especially with Kitty being in the city spreading rumors about Jake's status as a player.
Jake began drifting into sleep, and hardly realizing he was now in a dream, came face to face with his exes Bree and Marley right here in the NYADA theatre space, who were joined by Kitty and the other three girls in the Fork in the Road cast.
Song: "Ugly Heart" by GRL
Bree: Maybe I'm just crazy
Maybe I'm a fool
Maybe I don't know how to love but
Maybe I do
Maybe you know more than me but
This much is true
This little heart and brain of mine say
We're through with you
Marley: And I wonder does it blow your mind
That I'm leaving you far behind
I wonder does it stop your heart to know
You're not my sunshine, anymore
[Chorus]
Bree/Kitty: Okay you're pretty
Your face is a work of art
Marley/Bree/Kitty: Your smile could light up New York City after dark
Bree/Kitty: Okay you're Coverboy pretty
Stamped with a beauty mark
But it's such a pity a boy so pretty (Marley: Woah)
Marley/Bree: With an ugly heart
Kitty: An uh- an uh- an ugly heart
Marley/Kitty: An uh an uh
Kitty: An ugly heart
Bree: So
Kitty: Okay you're pretty
Your face is a work of art
Marley/Bree/Kitty: Your smile could light up New York City after dark
Bree/Kitty: Okay you're Coverboy pretty
Marley/Bree/Kitty: Stamped with a beauty mark
Bree/Kitty: But it's such a pity a boy so pretty (Marley: Yeah, woah)
Marley/Bree/Kitty: With an ugly heart
Bree/Kitty: Okay you're pretty
Your face is a work of art
Bree/Kitty/Marley: Your smile could light up New York City after dark
Okay you're Coverboy pretty
Stamped with a beauty mark
Bree/Kitty: But it's such a pity a boy so pretty
Marley/Bree/Kitty: (Bree: So pretty, so pretty) With an ugly heart
"Hey, Jake, wake up!" Blaine called, gently prodding Jake awake.
Jake looked confusedly around the room, rubbing his eyes awake. "Did someone, like, turn up the gas in here or something?"
"Ah, had another one of those dream sequence nightmares like puppetmaster week? I feel ya," Blaine said, slinging his bag over his shoulder and leading Jake out the theater.
INT. FONDUE FOR TWO STUDIO - FRIDAY, JANUARY 21 - EVENING
"Fondue for two! Fondue for two! That's some hot dish! Fondue for two!"
The live audience of Brittany S. Pierce's pilot episode of Fondue for Two was full of shrieking fans, many of whom were original viewers of Brittany's high school web show, or newer fans from over the past ten years. A special block of seats in the front row was reserved for Brittany's VIP guests: Sugar, Tina, Blaine, Jake, and Kitty.
Oddly reminiscent of the set of the Ellen DeGeneres Show, the set of Fondue for Two also had a myriad of cat displays around the set and audience, with Lord Tubbington himself (realistically maybe a generation or two of an heir down from the original Lord Tubbington) laying on a royal pillow behind Brittany's host chair.
"Hello, New York City!" Brittany greeted. "Welcome to the first episode of Fondue for Two. Our theme today, is 'New Directions.' Not only does this symbolize the new direction I am taking in my professional path as an internationally acclaimed veterinarian turned talk show host, but this episode celebrates two very special friends who I met in my high school glee club, the New Directions. Please welcome R&B sensation Mercedes Jones, and Tony-winning actress Rachel Berry!"
Mercedes and Rachel made a regal entrance onto the set, hugging Brittany as their friends cheered from the audience.
"So, Mercedes, our fans have been hot on the press about a rumored new project that has brought you back here to NYC," Brittany segued. "Would you care to elaborate?"
"Sure," Mercedes agreed. "I just want to air out that any rumors about me being back in the city to record a new album are, at this time, false. Don't get me wrong, it's awesome to be back in the land where my hit single 'Shakin' My Head' was born, but this is not that. No, instead, Mercedes Jones is in the city to kick off a new project: Ride in My Mercedes. I am hosting a competition to find America's next big girl group, and the hope is that these girls will ride with me into the next direction of my career. Maybe record a song featuring these girls, go on tour with these girls as my opening act."
"What made you want to kickstart this project?" Brittany asked.
"Well, you know, Fifth Harmony disbanded almost four years ago, and America still doesn't have that big new girl group at the moment, so I figured, what better time to search and discover, than now?" Mercedes explained, to tumultuous applause from the audience. "We'll be doing several open calls where we audition girls here in New York City. They can be existing group members or solo artists who may want to create a girl group."
"Talk to us about why this project means so much to you," Brittany requested.
"You know, I value sisterhood," Mercedes continued. "This industry can be so cut throat, with so much pressure and negativity, that the only way you can succeed is with a really strong support system behind you. I'm an open book about my struggles with this industry, and I really wanna help my fellow ladies out there succeed. Back in high school, I was in an all-girls show choir group called The TroubleTones, and it was in that group that I really found my star quality; like, I knew that I could be a star, but it was in that group where I finally felt like a star; you know what I mean?"
"I do," Brittany agreed. "My wife Santana Lopez and I were also fellow members of the TroubleTones, which was actually originated by our friend out in the audience tonight, Sugar Motta! Wave to the camera, Sugar!"
Sugar tidied up her hair and waved to the camera.
"Now, Rachel, you won a Tony award in the summer of 2020 for your portrayal of world famous novelist, Jane Austen, in the original musical Jane Austen Sings, which happened to be directed by your husband, Jesse St. James," Brittany segued on. "How was that experience for you?"
"Oh, it was and still is marvelous," Rachel said. "You know, to be in this process of actually originating a role, there's nothing quite like it. It's like, it's your baby, you created it, and you put it out there for the world to see for the first time."
"Longtime followers of your career will recall the harrowing story of how you, an unknown 18-year-old girl from Lima, Ohio, landing the role of Fanny Brice in the 2014 revival of Funny Girl, for which you ditched a performance to audition for a TV pilot, forcing your understudy, my wife, Santana Lopez to go on for Act 1, despite the fact that Santana had resigned from the show almost a year prior," Brittany reviewed. Rachel gritted her teeth, furious that this dark part of her history was re-aired like this. "What transformations have you undergone since then?"
"I won't lie, it's been a journey," Rachel said. "After that point in my life I had to turn back to the power of education, and really reevaluate where it was that I wanted to go and who I wanted to be. There was this big fork in the road: do I go back to college, or do I go back to Broadway? Mercedes here actually landed me this huge audition to get back to Broadway, but a very dear friend of ours, Sam Evans, he along with my best friend Kurt Hummel, really guided me back to education, and finishing college, and it was actually through finishing college that I got the opportunity to be a part of Jane Austen Sings. So, you know, it's fate, and you just gotta trust in fate and let life take you where it leads you."
"Amen," Mercedes agreed, leading the crowd through more applause.
"So, Rachel, now that Jane Austen Sings is set to close by the end of this month, what's next for you?" Brittany asked.
"Oh, I can't share too much, but there are a few offers lined out on the table, but of course, you know in today's climate, it's a little hard for a girl like me to get seen for many shows these days–" Rachel began.
"What do you mean, for girls like you?" Brittany asked.
Rachel blinked once, awkwardly trying to figure out how to say what she wanted to say. "You know, in today's political climate, as we talk about diversity, equity, and inclusion, there has been a real shift to opening doors for BIPOC artists, that in some ways has actually closed doors for white actors."
Rachel instantly knew she had made a mistake, as some fans in the audience were murmuring their disagreement.
"So you're saying that white actors are now marginalized on Broadway?" Brittany asked.
"No, not at all!" Rachel clarified. "It's just that, because of all the social justice warriors out in the world today, I think it's created a culture of 'wokeness' where many white actors are passed over for the sake of meeting a 'BIPOC quota,' which in many instances isn't even proportional to the racial demographic it's meant to represent."
"Oh my god, she's digging herself even deeper into her grave," Kitty whispered to Tina, who looked horrified.
"Mercedes, as a black woman yourself, what would you say to that observation?" Brittany asked.
"Look, I'm not gonna pretend to be a Broadway girl, and I don't know much about this business, but all too often, performers of color have often been sidelined because we don't meet some social norm," Mercedes explained. "Case in point, high school senior year, we auditioned against each other for the role of Maria in West Side Story. Who got the role? The skinny white girl-"
"Technically we were offered a double cast," Rachel tried to clarify.
"Even though the show is literally about racism and how the colored girl isn't supposed to be with the white boy," Mercedes stated. Many in the audience were shocked at this revelation. Rachel Berry playing at Latina role?
Mercedes continued, "I do think times are changing. There are shows like Hamilton out there right now that are opening doors for BIPOC performers."
"Well, I would also add that Hamilton's exclusivity to only casting performers of color in their principal roles is a bit hypocritical and counter-intuitive," Rachel said.
"You said what now?" Mercedes asked.
"Look, Lin Manuel Miranda describes Hamilton as American-then told by America-now, and there are white people here in America today," Rachel said.
"Yeah, but Rachel, look at all the other shows that are running right now: Chicago, Come from Away, Dear Evan Hansen, Phantom of the Opera, Wicked, when it comes to the female roles, the white girls dominate in those–" Mercedes began listing.
"Well, let's look at shows like Six, where despite being about European queens, the cast features about seven or eight women of color and only two or three white women," Rachel said. "Where is the equitable proportionality in that?"
"Are you really trying to–" Mercedes stammered.
"Now, I totally agree that when we look at the level of access that children of color have to performing arts, it is disparaging, which is why I support the idea of providing scholarships to students of color, and creating programs in predominantly black or hispanic neighborhoods, or things like that," Rachel went on. "But as we're auditioning for these shows, I can't help but notice that many well-deserving white actors are being passed over just so that the production team can show the social justice warriors that their show contains at least 51% people of color."
"She did not just say that," Tina whispered to Blaine.
A few members of the audience began booing, and the boos only strengthened with each passing second. Brittany's show executives were desperately waving at her to cut.
"The voice in my ear tells me that we're going to cut to commercial," Brittany announced to the audience. "And Twitter is abuzz right now, with the trending hashtag, Cancel Rachel Berry."
Song: "Monster" from Frozen
As Rachel watched the set lights come down, she began to lament in her imagination.
It's finally come
Come to knock down the door
I can't hide this time
Like I hid before
All this pain, all this fear
Began because of me,
Is the thing they see
The thing I have to be?
A monster, are they right?
Has the dark in me finally come to light?
Or am I just a monster, in a cage?
Rachel hurried out of the studio and took to the streets. All around her, people were already sharing the footage of Rachel's remarks on TV.
What do I do?
No time for crying now
I started a storm
Gotta stop it somehow
Do I keep running?
How far do I have to go?
And would that take the storm away
Or only make it grow?
No, I have to stay alive
To fix what I've done
Save the world from myself
And bring back the sun
INT. MARQUIS THEATER
Rachel was on stage as Jane Austen, overlooking an audience in which many were leaving their seats mid-show in protest of Rachel's comments. This would surely mean a premature closing to Jane Austen Sings.
If I'm a monster, then it's true
There's only one thing that's left for me to do
But before I fade to white
I'll do all that I can to make things right
I cannot be a monster
I will not be a monster
Not tonight!
