Tears pricked in her eyes as she bit the end of her pencil. Do not cry. Do not cry.

Clarissa Fray sat inside Taki's, the diner she worked at, waiting for her shift to start when Jace Herondale- her ex whom she was still very much in love with- walked in with Aline Penhallow on his arm. Aline was the new girl at school who had just transferred from some school in Europe. She was the current interest of all the boys in their twelfth grade class. Looks like she caught Jace's eye as well.

Clary forced her gaze back down to the homework in front of her. He knew she worked here, how dare he bring another girl here on what she supposed was a date. To mock her? Show off how much he was over and done with her? She swallowed back the lump that was forming in her throat. Do not cry. Do not cry.

The diner itself was small, so she heard him request a booth in what he knew was her favorite section because that's where she had the best of luck with tips. What a jackass. She snuck a glance and saw Jace interwine his long beautiful fingers with Aline's as the hostess led them over to their requested table. Her fingernails dug into her palms and for a moment she thought she would draw blood.

She did not want to run to the back and give him the satisfaction of knowing that him being here with Aline was having any sort of effect on her. She would not give him that. Though, her chest felt as if someone had placed a cinderblock on it, making it hard to breathe. She sucked in a deep steadying breath.

From her peripheral vision she could see Jace removing Aline's jacket before removing his own and sliding into the booth. He looked so handsome. As always.

She stuffed her school books into her bag before hopping off the stool of the coffee bar as nonchalantly as she could force herself. They'll just be here for about an hour…she thought. I can get through an hour. She smoothed down her red pin-striped uniform dress and made her way to the back office room to clock-in.

"Sup Red," Jordyn Kyle's voice boomed as he approached her, a big white smile on his tan face. She gave him a small smile, "Hey you!" she tried to sound as cheery as she could but was failing miserably. His dark brows bunched up on his forehead, "Uh-oh. I know that look. Whose ass I gotta kick?" He crossed his arms across his broad muscled, "Was it that blondie? That's who you're dating right?"

She bit her lip and reached for her apron on the hook besides the office door, "Well…I broke up with him. So no, we're not dating anymore."

He didn't seemed satisfied with that answer, "Why'd you break up? You guys were really into each other."

She steeled herself. The tears most certainly wanted to fall from her eyes but she wouldn't cry in front of Jordyn. She also knew if he found out Jace was here, he would not hesitate to make a scene. "I got accepted to a school out on the West Coast and I want to go. But he got upset that I had even applied in the first place and called me a liar and said that I never loved him and-" she stopped herself from going too much into detail and sounding like a whiny teenager, "….whatever, basically I'm going to be going away next year and we're not going to do the long-distance thing."

"Hmmm…" Jordyn hummed, "You mean he didn't want to do the long-distance thing. Am I right?"

They stared at each other for a moment before she lowered her gaze, "Yeah." She whispered.

He nodded, his shaggy dark hair falling into his eyes. "Well, that sucks. I'm sorry Fray. But if it makes you feel any better, there's lots of hot blondes on the West Coast- I would know." He winked at her with a smirk playing at his lips, "So I'm sure you can find a replacement pretty easily."

She gave him a wry smile. His words hadn't helped but she was desperate for this conversation to be over. "Thanks." Then she set off to her usual section. They'll just be here for about an hour. Just an hour. I can do this.

When she reentered the dining area, Kaelie, a morning waitress, locked eyes with her and dashed to her side, yanking her behind the coffee bar. She leaned in and whisper-yelled, "Your boy Jace is here with some other girl!"

Can I really do this? She hadn't really gone into much thought about having to explain to the other waitresses why Jace was here with another girl. How humiliating. "Um…yeah. We broke up."

Kaelie's eyes sparked in anger, "And he had the audacity to bring his new thing here?! I'll spit in his soda. Or her soda, or both their-"

Clary pressed a grateful hand to the blonde girl's shoulder, "It's fine Kaelie…thanks though."

Kaelie bit her lip, concern creasing her otherwise smooth features, "I know I'm supposed to get off now, but if you want I can take the table for you. That way you don't have to serve them." She sneaked a peek to where they sat, "They're sitting in your section after all."

Clary didn't follow her gaze, "I know. He's doing it on purpose. I'll be fine, thanks though."

Kaelie squeezed her hand encouragingly and said her goodbyes before running over to their manager for her check-out.

Clary dug into her apron pocket for her pen and notepad. Here goes.

Jace's hand was holding Aline's hand from across the table and their heads were bowed together as if they were sharing a secret. She rolled her eyes as she approached and cleared her throat. "Welcome to Taki's. My name is Clarissa, I'll be serving you this afternoon. Did you have enough time to look over the menu?" her voice sounded robotic to her ears.

Jace didn't look at her, "Yes, I'll do the turkey club with a short stack of the coconut pancakes. And my lovely," he placed emphasis on 'lovely', "lady will have the green goddess salad with toasted sourdough bread."

The lump came back to her throat and she willed it down, "Drinks?" she squeaked. She couldn't help but catch a whiff of the cologne Jace was sporting. It was the one she had always told him she loved and though it wasn't exactly his favorite- he always wore it. Just for her.

"We'll just do two waters, thanks babe." Said Aline meeting her gaze. "That'll be all."

She nodded and hurried away from the table. She yanked the pad paper out and brought it into the kitchen where Jordyn was maning the food window. As she passed him the food order slip, he caught her expression and narrowed his eyes, "He's here isn't he?"

A rogue tear escaped and she wiped it away just as quickly as it fell. "It's fine Jordyn, please don't make a scene." She sniffed and poured two glasses of ice water for the couple. Jordyn watched her as she made her typical guest set-up, two plates and two sets of utensils. "You're killing me Fray."

She nodded, "Maybe, but we both need our jobs, so just don't do anything. Please." It wasn't a lie. Clary needed the waitress gig to pay for her phone plan as well as save up enough for the Tisch Art program at NYU she had enrolled herself into this coming summer. Tuition was due a week before the program started and she was almost at her goal. She needed the job until then. "Back to the trenches I go…"

She got sat with two new tables, so she dropped off the waters to its respective table before greeting her new not-Jace-and-Aline tables. By the time she had finished taking both orders and sending them to the kitchen, Jace and Aline's food was waiting for her at the food window. She hadn't done a good job at ignoring the couple. She was very familiar with his signature look that got girls- including herself- all hot and bothered, and it was on full display over at table seven. She rolled her eyes before grabbing both plates of food and shuffling over to their table. Jace was leaned over the table whispering sweet words that sounded a lot like beautiful and sexy. She shivered. He was trying to turn this girl into putty right in front of her. She didn't even look at them as she placed the plates down on the table. She cleared her throat, "Here's your food, enjoy."

"Thank you!" Aline chirped, but Clary was already stalking away to hide behind the coffee bar. She was fuming. Stupid Aline and her stupid cute voice and her stupid polite manners. And stupid Jace for saying those stupid words to her that he knew she could hear. Stupid, stupid, stupid-

Someone cleared their throat behind her, "Excuse me miss."

Clary knew that voice. She shut her eyes and begged herself to keep her composure as she slowly turned to the golden eyes looking down at her. She blinked up at Jace who looked at her impassively, "I need ketchup."

Instead of opening her mouth and possibly losing her job, she nodded. She reached over the coffee bar for the glass Heinz ketchup bottle and ignored how her heart sped up under his penetrating gaze. She held it out to him without a word. He cocked a golden brow before taking it from her hand and heading back to his table. How dare he come over to her and ask for ketchup. 'Excuse me miss?' Was that all she was now- just Miss? He could've asked any other waitress but no, he just had to walk all the way over here and disturb her peace more than he already was and ask her for ketchup.

She darted to the bathroom as tears once again brimmed in her eyes. She shut the door behind her and locked it. A sob escaped her throat and she allowed the bitter tears to fall this time. She placed a hand over her heart as if she could feel the muscle physically twist in her chest. She knew from science class, her physical heart muscle wasn't twisting- it was just a hormonal triggering of fight-or-flight stress. But dammit, it hurt all the same.

Why did he have to do this? Why!? Had the three years they dated meant nothing to him? Had the promise to marry her and start their lives together after high school just been words to bed her? How could someone go from looking at you like you hung the stars in the sky to something they didn't and never cared about at all? Her mother had warned her about the perils of young love. That most boys her age weren't sincere with their declarations of eternal love. She hadn't wanted to believe her mother- the woman was so bitter after her father left. But now she could see perhaps her mother had a point.

Her stomach roiled and made a noise. She clasped her mouth before rushing to the trash can and emptying her stomachs contents into the large black bin. The splashing of vomit hitting the plastic covering of the bin grossed her out and made her want to throw up even more, purely out of disgust. After a moment, she felt a hand grab her hair, pulling it back and as she heaved and heaved over the bin. When she was done, she straightened up and the mysterious persons face came into view. Fuck me.

"Are you alright?" Aline's concerned brown eyes searched her face. "You look really pale…"

Clary dropped her gaze and wiped her mouth with the back of her hand. "I- I'll be okay…"

There was a pause. Aline opened her mouth to say something before shutting it again. The raven haired girl settled on a nod and turned to the door. "Feel better…" she offered weakly before attempting to open the bathroom door.

"It's locked-" Clary made a move to go over and unlock it for her but Aline twisted the lock herself. She looked back apologetically before going back into the dining room area. Clary huffed and facepalmed herself. "Great."

By the time she returned to her section Jace and Aline were gone. She darted over to the table. Would they really have dined-and-dashed on her? She breathed a sigh of relief when she saw the cash on the table. She snatched it and went over to her other tables who were looking at her expectantly and none too pleased. She blushed and went back to work, greeting her other new tables that had been seated in her section.

Jeremy Pontmercy, her manager, was bussing the table where Aline and Jace had sat as she worked her section. He came over to her, a white rag slung over his shoulder. "Clarissa, did you check your section before you started your shift?"

She grimaced, "Uh- yes, why?"

He held up a glass bottle of ketchup, "This was under that table that you left dirty in your section. The customer could've accidentally kicked it and broken the glass and gotten ketchup all over their shoes."

She narrowed her eyes and looked away from the plate set-ups she was making, "They left the ketchup on the floor?"

He shook his head, "No, this one was on the floor. There was another ketchup bottle on the table. They must have used that one. Please be more aware of your section. Remember, whenever there's downtime you need to sweep your section. That means under the tables as well. You would've caught this if you had swept under your tables while it was dead when you came in."

Her brows squished together but she nodded. She always went straight from school to Taki's for the exact reason that she wanted to clean her section before the afternoon rush came in. And she had done just that today as well. One of her tables waving her down broke her out of her thoughts. She went over and continued the rest of her shift, now finally in peace that Jace and his date were gone.

It was 11:30PM when Taki's front door sign was flipped from OPEN to CLOSED. Clary sat besides Maureen and Maia as the three girls counted her tips. "Some guy came in and asked me for my shoes and pictures of my feet" Maureen snorted before taking a sip from her tall chocolate shake. Maia and Clary's mouths dropped open, "What?" Maia's hand grabbed Maureens arm, "Please tell me you said yes."

"Yes?!" Clary choked and tipped her head, "Are you crazy?"

Maia's eyes narrowed at Clary, "You're in high school kid. But believe me, there are some big weirdos out here who will drop a pretty penny for feet pics."

Maureen laughed and nodded, "Yeah. I sold him my shoes on the agreement that he'd run over to the Sketchers on Spring Street and buy me a new pair. He said he just wanted the ones I was wearing so he could sniff them…" she shuddered, "Weird. But he gave me three-hundred-"

"Three hundred?!" Clary leaned in and whisper-yelled, looking over her shoulder to make sure no one else was listening. Maureen nodded, a sly grin on her face. "And he gave me a hundred dollar cash advance on the feet pics. He gave me his email address so I can send them to him. Gives me enough time to go get a pedicure tomorrow morning before my toe 'photo shoot'."

Maia nodded, "I had a weird freaky regular who used to pay for feet pics too. Jordyn found out and threatened the dude." She shook her head, "He never came back."

Clary barked out a laugh, "I cannot believe what I just heard."

Maia shrugged, "Well, believe it Fray. There's a reason Only Fans models make so much. Most men are weird and desperate."

She looked down and tried to ignore the sudden pang in her chest. She wished in that moment, that Jace was desperate. Desperate for her. But he seemed to have moved on so quickly, it was almost laughable. She shook her head- he most definitely was not thinking of her right now so why was she wasting her time thinking of him? He was probably laid up- or trying to get laid up- with Aline. She swallowed hard and forced him out of her thoughts.

Maia whistled as she re-counted her money, "Tonight was great." She held up the wad of cash to the girls, "Three fifty in tips. And on a Thursday night."

Jordyn swooped by and snatched it from her hand, "Thanks babe, now I'm three-fifty closer to buying the PS5." Maia scowled and snatched it back from him, swatting his arm playfully as she did. "You wish this money was going towards that hunk of junk."

Clary shrugged on her demin jacket over her uniform and slid out of the booth. "I'll see you girls tomorrow night."

Maureen looked up from counting, "You sure you don't want us to walk with you to the train?"

She waved a hand, "Nah, the weather is warm. There's lots of people still out, I should be fine." She slung her book bag over her shoulder, "Thanks though." And with that she left the small diner and stepped into the cool air of a the Manhattan night.

She turned the corner on Madison Street heading onto the Manhattan Bridge. The weather was nice enough to walk over the bridge and enjoy the view. She made her way past the triumphal arch and colonnade at the Manhattan Bridge entrance. Even at this time one could find joggers coming off or onto the bridge, though it was far fewer than during the daylight hours. The bridge was lit up with lights coming down from the cables that connected to the monolith sized spires. The lights were by no means warm or cozy, but the stark bright lights did fill her with a sense of comfort. This was her city. These were the lights she had walked under for years and years. A part of her didn't know if she truly had it in her to leave it all behind.

She felt butterflies at the thought of actually leaving New York City- specifically Brooklyn, her home. Simon was here. So was her mom, and Luke. And just about an hour drive up north was Luke's farmhouse. And…the bookstore, she thought almost nostalgically. Change was hard, but change was what helps us grow- right?

She was now walking over the East River when the train rattled past her, drawing her out of her thoughts. She paused her walking and held onto the railing of the walkway as she waited for the train to pass. The train shook the bridge. That unfortunately was something she had never gotten used to. People around her kept walking, clearly not caring about the unnerving rumbling of the bridge below their feet. Up ahead, one man also stopped walking. Someone who has sense, she thought. Under the stark light of the bridge she could observe the man was crowned with a halo of tousled golden hair. As if he could sense someone watching him, the man turned to look at her and golden eyes locked with her emerald ones. Dear God…

Her heart fluttered in her chest but she forced her gaze away, the train having now passed by. She kept her eyes down as she walked forward. He didn't want anything to do with her, that much was apparent based on his behavior from earlier. But what on earth was he doing here now, at this time?

Who cares! None of your business, MISS. She bristled at the memory of him calling her miss- miss! She couldn't even bear the thought of being so heartless and calling him anything so…so formal and lacking any familiarity. Sir?She doubt the word would even form in her mouth.

She continued to keep her gaze down as she walked, increasing the speed of her footsteps. She tried to pass him without a glance but her downcast eyes eventually came into view with a pair of black combat boots. His black combat boots. Not even looking up, she side-stepped, trying to get out of hisway and he stepped back into her way. Her jaw tensed.

"C-Clary…" he choked.

Her stomach flipped at the sound of her name on his tongue. It melted her. Her traitorous heart betrayed her mind and she looked up at him. His pale golden eyes were creased with something indescribable and they glistened.

She opened her mouth to say 'excuse me' but no sound came out. She shut it just as quickly. He cleared his throat, as if perhaps he thought she maybe hadn't heard him speak the first time. "Clary…" he spoke hesitantly.

She shook her head and looked back down. She had homework to finish so she didn't have time for this. Whatever he had to say to her, she didn't want to hear it. Or so she told herself.

Plus, they both had classes together tomorrow. He could easily stop her in the halls if whatever he wanted to say was of importance.

She tried side-stepping him again and this time he allowed her to walk past him. She did briskly.

But he followed closely beside her.

"I know after earlier the last thing you want to do is to talk to me. But I just wanted to apologize."

At this she stopped and whirled around to him, her green eyes sparking with rage. Her pale skin flushed and anger curled hot in her gut like a blazing inferno that wanted to rip her from the inside out. "Apologize?" she spat out the word bitterly, "Whatever for?" she ended sarcastically.

That froze Jace's usual smug self into place. He squirmed under her intense gaze. She had to admit, if she wasn't so mad, it would be funny to watch. "I- I'm sorry for being so childish."

"Oh!" she laughed devoid of humor, "You're sorry for being childish? What could you have possibly done that would be deemed childish?"

He flinched away from the harshness in her voice and stammered for an answer. "I- you know-"

"I don't know. So jog my memory for me."

He blew out a breath, "I'm sorry for being so stupid and bringing the new girl from school to your job." He bowed his head, his voice solemn, "You didn't deserve that."

She snorted and repeated his words, "You're sorry."

He met her gaze, "There's no excuse that would make it okay, but yes. I'm sorry." He reached out for her but she took a step back. "Don't." She warned.

He shook his head. "Aline told me she saw you in the bathroom. She said you looked really bad…"

Her ears burned. Of course Aline had ran and told him that their waitress was hurling and crying in the bathroom. "…I wanted to go to the bathroom and apologize right then but she suggested we just pay and leave. So we did."

"Ahh" she began sharply, "You actually felt bad. Incredible. I didn't think someone as selfish as you could carry a bone of compassion in your body, but" she threw up her arms, "you learn something new everyday."

He continue to look at her, his gaze steady. She wanted so desperately to reach out and grab his beautiful face and kiss him. To smooth away the sadness from his perfect features and tell him she forgave him and she just wanted to stop fighting and be with him again. But her pride would not let her. She loved him, yes. But she loved herself as well. She would not allow him to disrespect her so easily. "Well, it was unfortunate running into you. Have a nice life." She turned to stalk away but he pulled her back. She didn't fight against his touch.

"Clary." Jace breathed, "Aline is gay."

She blinked and turned back around to him. She searched his face, trying to catch him in a lie. She knew his face so well after three years of having been together and many more having just been friends. She found nothing but sincerity. "Gay?"

He looked around him, as if searching to see if anyone they knew would be around- listening. "Yes, she's gay. She hasn't officially come out to her family yet but she's told me and the Lightwoods…she has a girlfriend. I know Aline- we go back." He ran a hand through his hair, "You cannot tell anyone- I'm only telling you because I need you to know that me bringing her to Taki's was-" he looked away and a flush rose on his high cheekbones. "It was me trying to make you jealous."

Her brows shot up. Jealous. Jace Herondale was trying to make her jealous? If she wasn't so pissed she'd be flattered. "And why would you want to do that." Was all she could say.

He looked back down at her incredulously, "Because I love you Clary. I love you and I don't want you to go all the way to fucking California." He pulled at his perfectly tousled hair that she wished in this moment to run her hands through. "I- I didn't want us to break-up. But I was just so shocked and mad that you had even applied in the first place. We never had Cali in our plans- we never discussed moving away. And you just did it- to me it seemed like maybe you were secretly done with me. Like maybe-"

She put up a hand to stop him, "We've already had this conversation. I told you I still loved you. I was just exploring my options-"

"Exploring your options." He said acidly, "You were always my only option. For me it was always you- whatever future I stepped into wouldn't be complete without you in it. But you- fuck, I don't know. You just made it seem so easy to pick a future without me in it."

She cocked her head to the side, her rage dissipating, "How could you think that?" She wanted to reach for his hand but she preferred to continue to let him squirm under her gaze. "After everything, you just assumed I wanted to throw things away just because I had mentioned that I got into a school out of state."

He held up a finger in protest, "No. I remember very clearly you said you were going to go to that dumb school. You didn't just mention it."

"No, I never said I was going-going. I was still thinking about it."

He thew his arms up, "What's there to think about? Wondering if I'm worth staying in the city for?"

She shook her head incredulously. "Of course you would make this all about you. What about what I want?"

He eyed her, "Clary, my family is here. My life is here. What do you want that is on the west coast? Because it's nothing you've mentioned before."

She paused. "I- I don't know. Just a change in scenery, somewhere new to explore."

"Suddenly I'm boring?"

No- no. How could he think that? "Somewhere new to explore, not someone."

The bridge began its rumbling again right before the D train flew by them. She reached for the fence above the railing to steady herself but Jace reached for her outstretched hand first and pulled her to him. She let herself fall into him- it was much easier surrendering to him than fighting her desire to stay angry. They stared at each other wordlessly, but with so much being said within their gazes. I love you. I never stopped loving you and never will stop. You're so infuriating. You're so beautiful. Please lets stop fighting. How did we let this go on for so long. Do you still love me? Can you forgive me? His grip on her was firm as the ground shook beneath them, but when the rattling stopped he continued to hold her. She continued to stare, not being able to look away. Jace broke the silence. "Do you still love me?"

In her mind, her pride wanted her to scoff and ask him what kind of a stupid question was that. But this wasn't the correct moment to be prideful. Jace was seldom vulnerable, and much less vocal about said vulnerability. "Of course, Jace. You're the one who broke up with me, remember?"

He flinched, "I was in the heat of the moment…I wanted to take the words back as soon as I had said them but I was so-" he grasped for the right words but fell silent and hung his head.

She squeezed his hand that was holding hers lightly, "You were so what?"

He breathed, "Betrayed, Clary. I felt so hurt and betrayed like you had planned to leave me all along-"

"No-"

"Let me finish." He continued, "You know my story. My mom left me via suicide and my dad left me because he never wanted me in the first place. I thought maybe it was happening again. That once again, I was being left behind."

Tear welled in her eyes. She imagined a little golden haired boy pushing opened the bathroom door to find his mother in a bathtub filled with bloody water. Of a boy hiding under furniture and in dark crevices in closets to escape his father's unearned wrath. And of that same boy, all grown up, heart tearing to pieces as he watches another piece of his tattered heart be ripped from him. "I would never."

He pushed a lock of her red hair back behind her ear. "I love you, Clary."

A tear slipped from her eye as she leaned her head forward and pressed it against his chest. "I love you too, Jace."

He rubbed her back. "I don't want to fight."

"Let's stop fighting then."

He dropped a kiss atop her head. "Forgive me for being an ass earlier?"

She smiled smugly against his chest, "It's going to take a lot of ice cream for me to even begin to forget that little fake date you set-up with the new girl. Did you actually come up with that on your own?"

He hummed, "It was Izzy's idea actually."

Her head shot up, "WHAT." She was going to KILL Isabelle Lightwood. He laughed, "She thought we were both being stupid so her reasoning was to fight stupid with even more stupid."

That sounded like something Isabelle would say. "I will be having words with Isabelle tomorrow."

He looped and arm around her and they started towards Brooklyn. "You and I both. Last time I take advice from Izzy. What a disaster. Almost as bad as her cooking. No- this was worse."

She had to agree. They followed the lights that illuminated their city across the bridge and fell into a comfortable banter. Teenage love was funny, she thought to herself. Every fight felt like the end of the world and every reunion like you could hear wedding bells in the distance. She clung to Jace tighter and smiled. Whatever came of California would be another bridge they would cross together whenever the time came. For now, they would enjoy what was left of their Senior Year and make the most of their time together whether she decided to go away or stay.

One thing was certain. Her heart would always stay with Jace.


GAHHHHH. This has been sitting in my computer since literally February and I just couldn't get the ending right. I wanted it to be a little corny but not mega corny and idk if I found the correct balance or not, but I've told some people I would be posting uploads sooner and I haven't and I felt bad for not sticking to my word so here is an upload.

**Also, in my head I'd like to imagine that Jace ends up going to Cali with Clary just to appease her curiosity and there she realizes New York is truly her only home and they both go back and live happily ever after in a cute little brownstone in Brooklyn 3 with a cat of course. Maybe Church, maybe not Church.

I still plan on posting more Clace one shots so follow me if you want those direct updates!