prompt: Pansy Parkinson/Sirius Black plus denial of feelings on Sirius part
Sirius turned the glass several times in his hands and looked at the cover of E ntertainment Weekly. His face was on the cover of latest issue and a title that made him shudder a bit of disgust,
"Sirius Black - his most intimate secrets."
There was an interview with him in the newspaper promoting his latest film, James Bond. And of course it was just the beginning as the real promotion started later this week.
The phone beeped, and Sirius saw it was a message from his attorney, Phlox Parkinson.
"You want to sue EW? " He laughed slightly and replied " No, I don't ."
Phlox was one of his closest friends, besides James and Remus. Their life paths were so different, but they had stuck together for so many years.
His phone screen lit up again when he saw a message from another sender,
"You are in London?"
His stomach tightened.
"Yes, until tomorrow. I'm flying to Los Angeles in the morning. And you?"
"Meet with me. In an hour, you know where."
He swallowed and put the whisky glass aside. Eventually, he knew this day would come anyway. He put on a hooded sweatshirt, got his glasses ready, and ordered an Uber.
In the bathroom, he jumped into the shower to and took a quick one. After it, he dressed up and when it was time to leave, he noticed something. A movie leaflet on the cupboard by the main door.
"The art of flying. " And on the leaflet, the face he had perfectly engraved in his head. Almond eyes, dark hair and red, full lips.
He swallowed hard.
"A story that millions have loved. Oscar-nominated Pansy Parkinson for the daring role of Ellie, the girl who conquered Hollywood. "The Art of Flying'' in cinemas. "
He put on his sunglasses and stepped out into the darkness of the night.
Pansy was already waiting for him at the bar, slowly sipping a drink. As soon as he came over, she nodded, got up, and they went to a secluded box in the VIP section.
As they sat down, he looked at her and saw the same girl he knew. Without a ton of makeup, styled hair and fancy dresses.
"Hi." She said and he replied.
There was a silence between them as she pulled the newspaper out of her purse.
"Pansy ..." Sirius began, but she shook her head. He knew what she meant, which extract to be precise, "Pansy, let me ..."
"No." She shook her head again and began to read, " There is no place for love in my life. Movies are my love, acting is. I love to play and will do it for the rest of my time. / And the women?/ I love all women, no exception. But there is no one and only one. And it never will . "
Sirius heard her voice break, tears as big as never appear in her big brown eyes. He saw her hands tremble as she put down the newspaper.
He swallowed hard and wanted to say something, but couldn't find the right words.
"So many years Sirius, so many bloody years waiting for you, and you can't admit it to yourself. If I mean nothing to you, tell me so. Break my goddamn heart and let me go. " He heard the tremble in her voice, a slight panic. Pansy had had enough, and he wasn't surprised at all.
He had known her for as long as he could remember and he was with her at every stage of her life; she was the daughter of Phlox. He supported her during the rebellion phase, gave her good advices, and when she turned eighteen he taught her to ride a motorcycle. And maybe that's why he couldn't tell himself how he felt about her. Because in a way it was weird, unbridled.
Their relationship changed when Pansy landed her first major role in a movie and needed a guide. Sirius eagerly took her under his wing and let her soar upward, spread her wings, and fly.
And even then, after the BAFTA awards, when she was drunk in a taxi, he drove her to his apartment. As he held her hair and made a drink for a hangover. He let her go.
With each passing day, feeling more and more anxiety, feeling that warmth in his heart that had never been there.
Pansy was becoming a part of him, and when she stole a kiss from him, he didn't protest. Without a word, he just let her. They needed such affection.
And when his heart was broken once she announced that she got a part in Hollywood and she would leave. She had expected him to say something then, but he remained silent. So she left to come back.
"Pansy." Her name on his lips usually sounded like the most beautiful music, but not today. "Pansy, I'm sorry." That was all he could tell her, because he had forgotten how to put sentences together as he looked at her pain.
"I've had enough." She said and finished her drink. "I'm fucking sick of all this, this pain, do you understand? That your sick head prevents you from loving me, that it takes you away from me. That you're an asshole and I'm such a naive girl. But it ends today. " Her bitter voice was sharp as a knife. "I'm moving to Miami, I got a contract there. I have a new movie, great friends, and perspectives that I can only dream of in London. "
Sirius stared at her and felt the anger emanating from Pansy's demeanor.
"My parents already know," She pursed her lips as the next words hurt, "You know as second. I don't know why and why I do this to myself. "
Pansy stood up and Sirius grabbed her hand. She looked him in the eye for a long time and he could see the corner of her lip was trembling. She was on the verge of collapse.
"You cannot destroy my life." She whispered as he pulled her and sat her down beside her. "You can't, nobody gave you the right." Her voice trembled, a shudder shook her body.
Sirius hugged her tightly against him, and she didn't argue. She cried, and he gave her space for it, feeling like the most pitiful man walking the Earth.
"I'm so sorry, Pansy." He purred into her hair, but he knew it was not enough, it was not enough. Pansy pushed him away and wiped the tears with the back of her hand. She looked at him and he saw those little salty drops and his heart was bleeding.
"I don't want anything to do with you. I want you to disappear from my life. " He deserved words like that, so he just nodded.
Pansy got up and took a necklace out of her purse that he instantly recognized. A gold chain with wings. It hung in her hand when she softly said,
"I accepted this movie about flying because you once told me that I have wings to fly. So I rose like a bird, but you decided to cut my wings. " She tossed the necklace at him. He caught it in flight.
Pansy took a step as she looked up at him from under her lashes again, licked her lips and said,
"I met someone."
Sirius nodded, but felt as if he had been hit in the face.
"Don't wait for me anymore."
And she left, and he knew she wouldn't be back this time.
