Akaza has had his eyes on the flame hashira for a good while now, and everything about it has been infuriating. It had all started when Muzan sent him to check on some lower-ranked demons that were taking too long to complete a fairly simple task. Usually, Akaza would have balked at such a stupid task, but his own sources had told him there was a hashira in the area and he'd been itching for a fight.

By the time he'd gotten to the town, Rengoku, that was what the woman he was with had called him anyway, had already slain the demons he was sent for. Akaza couldn't care less about them anyway, they were too weak to matter. The hashira on another hand was intriguing but despite his ache for a good battle, Akaza needed to know more before they fought.

Since then he's sought out his hashira whenever he can, he doesn't know when the flame hashira became "his" but it seems fitting. He fights with such power and grace that all Akaza wants is to be closer to the energy he radiates, but at the same time, every fight is disappointingly frustrating. His hashira is strong, but he could be so much stronger. Akaza can see it, It's obvious his hashira's humanity is holding him back. There's so much potential stored in every move he makes, but it never comes to fruition. Rengoku's fights leave Akaza seething every damn time, having to watch someone so great waste themselves on being human of all things. Akaza desperately wants to watch his hashira be free, he could be the brightest damn star there ever was and Akaza would be happy to burn if only to have the chance to see, or maybe even touch someone like him.

So when he gets word that his hashira will be on the train Akaza decides that now is the time, Rengoku will become a demon, and he and Akaza will stand at each other's sides for the rest of time. Akaza finds himself quite disappointed to discover that his hashira is not the only slayer on the train and is, in fact, accompanied by three nuisances and their pet demon, but in the end, they are too weak to mean much to him. He bides his time until the perfect opportunity arises as those bothersome children are finally separated from his hashira as the train crashes. Unfortunately, Akaza also loses sight of his hashira but he's come to know Rengoku well enough to also know the best way to draw him out, so he lunges for one of the younger slayers. The kid's obviously injured and Akaza could kill him in no time flat but he slows down and leaves himself open and it works. His hashira appears, always defending the weak, and slashes clean through his arm, it burns but Akaza pays little attention to it knowing he'll heal.

Rengoku turns down his first offer and annoyance flashes hot through Akaza, his hashira hadn't even considered his offer, didn't even think before saying no. Fine, Akaza thinks, it's no matter, I can show him. Show him what he could be, show him the power a demon has. Akaza's spent so long admiring his hashira from afar, he has no qualms about getting the man's undivided attention for a while. He's been itching for a good fight too, it's been far too long since anyone put up an entertaining battle, and fighting Rengoku will be worth every second.

And yet no matter what Akaza does, Rengoku refuses every time. Their fight has been just as glorious as Akaza predicted, Akaza hadn't considered himself capable of falling farther, but somehow he has. Then, of course, just in time to interrupt the most fun he's had in decades, those damn kids are back again. The boar-headed child arrives distracting Akaza for but a second but his thoughts only wander until he hears Rengoku growl, his hashira shouts some grossly human sentiment about death before attacking once more.

Akaza can almost see it as Rengoku charges him, all the power and potential he's always known his hashira is capable of is right there, bubbling just under the surface. Akaza can feel it and he figures that in the many many years he's been a demon this must be the closest he's come to standing in sunlight. He remembers missing the feeling of the sun's light on his face back in the early days after his transformation, but the memories have faded since. Nevertheless, this Akaza decides, this must be what it was like, and it's addicting. Akaza grins and swings again giddy to continue their dance even as he feels the sword rip into him dangerously close to hitting its mark. He'll heal he'll always heal and Akaza and his hashira can keep playing their game, but this time his hashira doesn't dodge. All that incredible speed, and he doesn't move.

Akaza can feel bones snapping and flesh tearing under his hands and a scream bubbles up then dies in his chest without going anywhere. He was supposed to dodge. They were supposed to keep dancing, he was supposed to dodge. Akaza can hear those goddamn kids yell but they don't matter. He was supposed to dodge.

Rengoku swings for his neck again, still full of fight, and Akaza doesn't bother to do anything about it. He growls "you were supposed to dodge" lowly before looking up into Rengoku's undamaged eye. His hashira looks calm, why is he calm? He's not supposed to die, he's supposed to live and become a demon with Akaza forever. Maybe, maybe he can still convince him, he has to convince him now. His hashira has to live.

"Become a demon and live," he asks again. Rengoku has to accept, there's no other option now. Akaza is sure, but he can still feel his voice do something odd and foreign. Whatever it was, it must have been right because his hashira's face shifts, eyebrows tilting up, and the corners of his eyes dropping. Akaza wants to look away from the almost sympathetic look. He's too powerful for sympathy, he's upper moon three he doesn't need sympathy, but if this is what it takes to keep Rengoku by his side he'll take it.

"No" Rengoku's answer is simple but awful, it makes Akaza's blood boil.

"Why?" he tries to shout but a sharp pain chokes his voice down to a has=rsh scraping halfway through. he knows his hashira is smart surely hes' smarter than this. Akaza's face feels tight and there's an unpleasant burning under his skin. Maybe this is the reality of getting too close to the sun for someone like him. "Why not?" he asks again, voice still coming out wrong. He was supposed to dodge. His hashira was supposed to say yes, but now he's going to die. he's going to die and be gone forever just like her.

Akaza hates that he can't remember her name. She's hidden by the same dense fog everything from before he became a demon is, but Akaza knows she was everything and he couldn't protect her. All Akaza's ever wanted was to be strong enough, he's so alone but if he just gets strong enough surely that will change. But, every damn time he thinks he's found something good the universe has to spit in his face. Rage spins hot and desperate in his stomach, not just anger at the universe for taking everything all over again, but for himself as well. If he'd only been less selfish. He could have stayed away, he could have not fought his hashira. Even the barest action of not selfishly assuming Rengoku was unkillable in their game, and his hashira wouldn't be dying right now. He'd be going back to the other slayers, and as much as Akaza despises that, he hates this more. Now he has to say goodbye because his hashira is too prideful, too stubborn, and too damn human and maybe that's Akaza's fault too. His fault for not being convincing enough, always his fault isn't it. Fuck, why would his hashira choose to die?

Akaza feels a tightness squeezing the corners of his eyes again and he squints as his vision burns and goes blurry, "Why not?" Akaza hisses again, gritting his teeth before continuing. His tongue feels much too large for his mouth, "Why would you choose death? You were supposed to dodge!" Akaza shouts finally finding his voice. His hashira is just watching, reactionless as Akaza breaks into a million pieces "You were supposed to dodge. You can't leave me, Please don't, please. You were, you, you were supposed to. Please" Akaza realizes he's begging at this point and that it's beneath him, but he can't stop mumbling variations of the same sentences until his throat closes up stopping him from embarrassing himself further. His face is warm and his eyes are still blurry and heavy, he swallows harshly and manages to whisper, " Why not why can't you stay with me?"

Rengoku coughs and a fresh trickle of blood runs down his chin. His sword shifts in Akaza's neck, but Akaza doesn't care if it cuts any further. He's too caught up in his hashira, who grits out "You cant become a demon twice" which makes no sense, why would someone ever want to take back becoming a demon? The power, the strength? Who would ever give that up? Akazas mind reels. Distantly, he notices the sky lightening and knows he needs to run, but Akaza would be lying if he said he wasn't half tempted to stay and burn. Burn away here and hope to find his hashira or whoever she was in the next life, but he can't. He has to know what Rengoku means.

Akaza jerks back his arm fully stuck inside Rengoku'ss body. He hears his hashira gasp in pain and winces, but the sun is rising and he has to go. He tugs again, harder this time, losing his arms in the process and snapping the sword in his neck. He still doesn't understand, he hears those other slayers yelling again but suddenly it couldn't matter less. The hole that Akaza himself ripped through his hashira is glaring back at him, a gruesome display of all his mistakes and selfishness. Then Akaza sees it. Blinking a few times to clear his eyes and make sure he's not seeing things Akaza gapes at his hashira. His vision stays fuzzy, but his view doesn't change a bit, and Akaza can do nothing but stand there stunned and aghast for another long moment before it clicks. Suddenly it makes sense, and his gaze snaps up to his hashira's face.

"You can't become a demon twice" he repeats, but his voice sounds distant. Rengoku doesn't say anything, just stands where he is watching Akaza closely. Akaza doesn't say anything else either, looking back down at his hashira enraptured as the bones muscles and flesh stitch themselves back together in an incredibly familiar way.

Despite Akaza's own voice still sounding distant through the pounding in his ears, he can still hear it shake as the next words leave his mouth unbidden and unplanned "You can stay by my side forever"

He sees the kind smile he's come to love again, or maybe he never stopped, curl across his hashira's face warm and comforting. Rengoku's eye closes as he says " Only if you come with me"

Akaza's eyes blow wide, the blur that's been clouding them shattering, he could stay. Rengoku would let him stay. But the sun is breaching the hill and there isn't enough time to choose.

Akaza runs.