The problem when you have two friends sharing the same birthday, is that sometimes, you wish that you have the ability to divide yourself into two when they both decide that they do not want to share their birthdays together.

"It's my birthday! The Traveller should be spending time with me!" Itto said, huffing his chest to make a point.

"It's Paimon's birthday and Paimon is the Traveller's bestest friend so they should spend their time with Paimon!" Paimon argued, crossing her arms in anger.

"Can't you guys just share?" the Traveller asked, groaning for the nth time.

""No!""

The Traveller threw their hands up in exasperation before walking away, no longer able to stand the two bickering with each other. They sat beside Ushi who was eating lavender melons, ignorant of the argument happening behind him. The Traveller was envious, if only they could become Ushi, then they would not have to deal with this nonsensical situation forced upon them.

"-and the Traveller will grant Paimon three wishes!"

Wait, what?

"What? No way! The Traveller will be granting me three wishes!"

Who is granting three wishes? The Traveller did not agree to this!

"Then whoever writes the best letter will get three wishes from the Traveller!" Paimon declared and the two shook on it in agreement.

"Don't I get a say in this?" the Traveller asked, glaring at the two of them.

""No!""

The Traveller sighed in resignation, this would be a very long day. Behind, Ushi continued eating his lavender melons, happy and content.

The letter writing contest took place in the Traveller's Serenitea Pot. It was the only location where if any of them lost in the contest, there would be minimal property damage. The last thing the Traveller needed out of this was to pay for property damage when it was not even their fault this time. Paimon and Itto 'borrowed' the Traveller's writing supplies, 'borrowed' in the sense that they promised to pay for the supplies later but ended up never doing it and the Traveller was too kindhearted to chase after them for a few mora.

Paimon started writing her letter, scribbling down the words she wanted to convey to the Traveller, that is, what she wanted the Traveller to do for her birthday.

Yay, Paimon's birthday is fiiiinally here! Paimon wants to make three wishes!

Paimon wishes that we can travel to more interesting places, taste MORE delicious food, make a lot of new friends, and leave our footprints in every nook and cranny of this world!

After writing her first wish down, Paimon looked over to see Itto in deep concentration as he wrote his birthday letter. The Traveller had left the room at some point with Ushi, leaving Paimon and Itto to write their birthday letters. Giving into her curiosity, Paimon took a quick peek at what Itto had written.

Hahahahahahahaha! Thank goodness I came up with a brilliant idea this year and found this secluded island where I stayed for a couple of days to stay away from the crowds. And guess what? This year, I'm not spending my birthday in prison! Hahaha!

On the other hand, spending days arm wrestling against Pale Red Crabs with a branch brought no joy... But now, the time's finally come. We celebrate, big time!

"Hey! No lying!" Paimon said, pointing a finger at Itto in accusation.

"Who's lying!? I'm not lying! Me and the gang really did find a secluded island where we stayed away from the crowds!"

"Really?"

"Yeah, we got stranded for a few days after our boat sank so Shinobu had to come rescue us!"

The Traveller opened the door to the room, only to find both Paimon and Itto arguing again, this time about the schematics of willingly staying on an island and being stranded on an island. They quietly closed the door, not wanting to be drawn into the middle of that and walked away to find something else to do. Ushi tagged along with the Traveller, seemingly finding them more interesting than his master.

Paimon went back to writing her letter the moment she was unable to come up with a counter argument. Itto smiled smugly in victory before returning to writing his letter. Ushi snuck a peek into the room and mooed to himself, happy that his master finally made a new friend.

The two finished their letters at the same time and hurried out of the room. They grabbed the Traveller, who had been cooking dinner in the kitchen. In the process of grabbing the Traveller, Itto knocked over the boiling pot and spilled the entire stew onto the floor while Paimon accidentally smacked the Traveller and sent them crashing straight into the hot spilled stew.

The curses that spewed out from the Traveller's mouth shall not be mentioned in order to keep a general rating for this story.

"So you want me to read your letters and decide who wrote the best letters?" the Traveller said, inspecting the two sealed letters in their hands. "Can I say no?"

""No!""

The Traveller sighed, as if they had already expected the answer. However, before the Traveller could open the first letter, there was a loud chomp and the letters disappeared from the Traveller's hands.

"Ushi! No! Spit that out right now!" Itto cried out as Ushi happily chewed on the letters while Paimon wailed loudly in the background.

Meanwhile, the Traveller took the opportunity to flee from the ensuing chaos. Perhaps they should seek Shinobu out. At the very least, she would know how to handle Itto.