Christopher walked into Meredith's hospital room and saw her sound asleep and snoring in her bed. She was clutching her stuffed animal, Puppy, to her chest.

Christopher sighed, not wanting to wake her up. But unfortunately he needed to do a small procedure on her, a procedure that would cause her pain and scare the little girl.

Christopher turns his head to the door when he sees Nurse Debbie walk in with the supplies needed for the procedure.

"Let me wake her up and talk to her first. She's going to be scared so I want to explain the procedure to her first." Christopher says to Nurse Debbie.

"Of course Dr Shepherd." Nurse Debbie says softly.

Christopher gently rubs Meredith's shoulder to wake her up. "Mer, can you wake up for me sweetie?"

"Mommy?" Meredith says, half asleep.

"It's Dr Shepherd Mer, Amelia and Derek's Daddy. Wake up for me sweet girl." He says, stroking her hair.

Meredith slowly opens her eyes. She gives him a little smile when she sees him. "Hi." She whispers sleepily.

"Hi Meredith. Did you and Puppy sleep well?"

Meredith nods sleepily. "Still tired." She looks around. "Where's Mommy?"

"She's working sweetie." He sees her lower lip start to wobble and knows she's about to burst into tears. "I know you want your mommy. I'm sorry she's not here."

"Want Mommy." She says, starting to cry.

"Shh, I know sweetie. Can I page Carolyn for you instead?"

Meredith nods so he pages Carolyn who arrives just a few minutes later. Carolyn sees the medical supplies and knows that the NG tube will be going in shortly. Luckily Meredith has not yet noticed the medical supplies in the room yet. She's been too focused on wanting her mommy and being tired.

"Meredith, we need to do a little procedure on you. This will help you get all the nutrients you need. I know it's been really hard for you to eat lately so this will help you out." Christopher tells her.

Meredith's eyes go wide and she shakes her head no.

"Mer, it'll be okay." Carolyn says.

"Don't want to." Meredith cries out.

"I know baby, but this will help you. Can we show you the procedure on your puppy first?" Carolyn asks.

Meredith nods and hands over Puppy.

Christopher demonstrates the procedure on Puppy. After he finishes with Puppy, Meredith hides under her covers. She is really scared.

"Baby, I know you're scared but we really need to do this. Can I hold you in my arms while he does the procedure?" Carolyn asks her.

Meredith slowly pokes her head out from under the blankets and they see all the tears running down her face. "I don't like being in the hospital!" She cries. "It hurts!"

"I know sweetie, I know." Carolyn sits on the bed and holds her arms out to Meredith. "Come here baby. Come sit with me."

Meredith crawls into Carolyn's arms and just cries. She buries her head into Carolyn's chest and sobs.

"Hey Meredith, did you know that after we get this tube into you, you'll be able to go home with us?" Christopher says.

"Really? I can go home?" Meredith asks, mumbling into Carolyn's chest.

"That's right! So as soon as we do this, the sooner you can come home with us. I know Amelia, Derek and Mark are all excited to see you." Carolyn says.

"I want to go home." Meredith says.

"Okay, can we do the procedure now?" Christopher asks her. She hesitates and then nods.

"Carolyn can still hold you but I need to see your face sweetie." Christopher says.

Carolyn gets Meredith into the position she needs to be in for the procedure while still holding onto her. Nurse Debbie has just returned with fresh supplies for Dr Shepherd to use.

Dr Shepherd starts the procedure and after a few minutes he is all done. Meredith has tears running down her face. She is holding Puppy to her.

"Okay, let's get you ready to come home with us!" Carolyn says excitedly.

"I'm going to go get her discharge paperwork. I'll be right back." Dr Shepherd leaves the room. He gets the discharge paperwork, has Ellis sign them, and then comes back.

Ellis is too busy as usual so Meredith goes home with the Shepherds. They will be watching her for a few days. They had purchased a new bed for her and put it in Amelia's room. They also made some accommodations to their house such as a bar next to the toilet that she can hold on to if needed. They knew that Meredith would be spending a lot of time at their house so they wanted to make sure it would be safe for her.

The Shepherds bring Meredith back to their house and settle her in. She is using the new crutches but absolutely hates them. She doesn't like how they feel. She feels so weird having to use them.

Meredith lays in her bed in Amelia's room feeling sad. She doesn't want to play or do anything. She wants her mommy to make her feel better. She doesn't want to be sick. She feels so different than Amelia, Derek, and Mark. They don't have to go through what she's going through. They don't have to be in constant pain or have procedures done on them or have a tube feeding them.

Meredith cries softly to herself. "I want my Mommy." She cries softly. "Mommy make me better please." She whispers.

Derek and Mark are walking to Derek's room and see Meredith laying in bed crying and looking sad. As her unofficial brothers, they feel like it's their duty to make her feel better. She's like a sister to them and they don't want her to be sad.

"Is she crying?" Mark says softly to Derek.

"I think so. Let's go check on her Mark."

The two boys walk into the room. They see her crutches propped up next to the bed. Meredith sees them but doesn't say a word. She just closes her eyes and turns her body away from them. She just wants to be alone.

"Mer, what's wrong?" Derek asks her.

No answer from Meredith.

"Should I go get your mom?" Mark asks.

Derek shakes his head. They both hear a tiny voice. "Wanna be alone."

"Come play with us Mer! It'll make you feel better." Derek says.

"No! Wanna stay with Puppy." She sobs. "Want my mommy!"

"I'm gonna go get your mom Derek. She's really upset." Mark says. Derek sighs and nods.

Mark goes to find Carolyn. He's really worried about Meredith. He finds Carolyn in the kitchen preparing dinner.

"Carolyn?" Mark says.

"Hey Mark. Everything okay bud?" Carolyn asks him.

"Meredith is really upset. Derek and I are trying to talk to her and get her to play with us but she won't. She's sobbing in her bed and wants her mom." Mark says with a frown on his face. "I don't like seeing her upset."

"Me either Mark, me either. I'll go and try to talk to her." Carolyn says.

As they get to the living room, they hear Meredith's sobs get louder. Amelia is sitting in the living room with a frown on her face. "Mommy, what's wrong with Mer? Why's she sad?"

"She misses her Mommy Amelia. And she's dealing with a newly diagnosed illness right now. It's not easy being your age and having to deal with that sweetie. She'll be okay, it'll just take some time for her to get used to everything." Carolyn says. "I need to go check on Meredith now sweetie okay? Try not to worry too much about it. Everything will be just fine."

Amelia nods and continues playing with her dolls.

Carolyn enters the room and sees Derek trying to comfort Meredith but not being successful.

"I got her Der, thanks bud." Carolyn says softly. She kisses him on the forehead.

Derek nods and goes to join Mark in the living room.

"Baby girl, shhh, I'm here." Carolyn says, stroking the top of Meredith's head.

"Want mommy." Meredith cries.

"I know sweetie, I know."

"Everything hurts! And I'm so different from everyone!" She sobs.

"You're still the same Meredith Grey sweetie. You have a new illness but you're still the same exact girl I know. This new illness doesn't define who you are baby. You will be okay."

"I don't like the feeding tube! It feels weird!" Meredith sobs.

"You'll get used to that, I promise sweet girl." Carolyn holds Meredith in her arms, rocking her back and forth.

"When do I go home to Mommy?" She sobs.

"In a few days baby girl. We'll take good care of you sweetie. I know you miss your mommy." Carolyn gives her a kiss on her forehead. "You will always be a part of our family Mer. I promise we will always look out for you. We will help you get used to your new diagnosis. Everything will be okay, I promise you that."

She whispers comforting things to Meredith for a while and eventually Meredith falls asleep in her arms.

—————————————————————-

Five days have passed and finally Ellis arrives to pick Meredith up.

Meredith sees her and gets super excited. "Mommy!!!!" She yells excitedly.

"Hi Meredith, great news! I've got you into this clinical trial at Seattle Pres.

We hope you liked! Thanks to my co-writer ktje