Chapter 1 - The anonymous guest


Any record of the remarkable skills and methods of my friend, Teti, could not possibly be complete without inclusion of this case. No other matter matter that has come before him has had such far-reaching effects - for ourselves, for Númenor, and for the eastern world. Unfortunately, that same importance makes the matter far too sensitive to share at this time. I record it now, awaiting a more peaceful time when it may be safely released. I hope it will come in my lifetime.

Though Teti is widely known in Númenor at this time, it may be a long while before this account is read, so an introduction for those unfamiliar with the man is warranted. I first met him while stationed in a small colony south of Umbar. Even then, he had an incredible passion for puzzles and mysteries, especially those related to crimes. We relied on his talents to resolve several cases, and at first it seemed like a good arrangement. But in hindsight, it was not so good for Teti. Though his accusations were always fair and truthful - and in fact, perpetrators were as often of Númenor as they were of Harad - his cooperation with us made him deeply unpopular with the local people. When a local rebellion forced us to abandon the colony, Teti returned with me to Númenor.

While in Númenor, Teti quickly made a name for himself and was regularly consulted on matters which the authorities could not solve. He insisted on only taking those cases which interested him. It could be difficult to determine beforehand which cases those would be. I have seen him turn down a burglary of priceless jewelry from a nobleman, in favor of a a woman whose marmalade kept disappearing from her pantry. Admittedly, the marmalade turned out to be related to an attempt on the woman's nephew's life, which no doubt would have succeeded without Teti's intervention, but I could hardly have realized this at the outset.

This case too started innocuously. It was one of those long afternoons late in the dry season, when the sun shines harshly down on the soot-stained roofs of the city and the breeze seems to carry the faint threat of future storms. Teti had not had a case in nearly a month, and had fallen into the strange mix of sloth and agitation that takes him when his mind is unoccupied. He lay listlessly on the couch. A newspaper was perched on one arm and hung over his head like a tent. I had thought him asleep, but when he angerly cast aside the paper I realized he had been reading.

"I wonder what could be accomplished if you west-folk focused half as much on anything as you do on your nobles," Teti muttered, blinking at the sunlight that now shown directly into his deep brown eyes.

"So you have said," I replied, "Which story are you speaking of this time?"

"The poisoning at the palace banquet last night," he said, turning to me. He was a small man, even by the standards of men in the east, with a dark complexion and features typical of far Harad. He was dressed in Númenorian fashion, with a long grey tunic and black sandals. His only concessions to his heritage were the soft black kohl he wore around his eyes, which he insisted had substantial health benefits, and a pendent of blue stone. "The newsman has provided quotations from people who were not even present, but neglects even such basic information as what dishes were served!"

"Is that the affair with one of Gil-Galad's folk wrapped up in it?" I asked. "Why does it matter what dishes were served?"

"To determine the poison of course. There are few truly flavorless poisons. Most are bitter, some sour, a few even sweet. A skilled assassin would match his poison to the flavor of the dish. And of course there is dissolution to consider - some dissolve better in cold, some in hot. A few do not truly dissolve at all, and are better applied to solid fare such as meat. And until one has determined the poison used, or at least narrowed it down considerably, they have no hope of tracing the source."

"Perhaps you should offer your services in the matter?" I suggested. I hoped he would. Teti's moodiness these last few weeks had gotten very tiresome for me.

"No no," he said with a wave of his hand. "I am interested in facts and reasoning, not politics, and the royal mind has only room for the latter."

At that moment, there was a knock on the door.

"Perhaps the good innkeeper will have a better suggestion," Teti said, turning his attention to the door. "Kulbâth! Please come in."

"How did you know it was me?" asked Kulbâth as she let herself in. She was a bustling, industrious woman, dressed as she usually was in a plain, flour-streaked dress and apron. She ran an inn a few streets away, and in my opinion made the best spiced mutton in the city.

"The jingle of those keys you carry is unmistakable," Teti answered. "But what brings you away from your busy kitchen? I hope it is something interesting."

"I'm not sure I would call it interesting," she admitted. "In fact, I'm not even sure if it's something. But I've had something odd happen with one of my guests, and I can't shake this feeling that something is off. And, of course, he hasn't paid yet either."

"Please explain what has happened. Start from the beginning."

"Well it was the night before last, late. This fellow comes in asking for a room. I asked him how long he would need it, and he said he wasn't sure yet, but it would be at least 2 nights, and he would know tomorrow if he needed it longer. He went out the next morning, and I haven't seen him since."

"And I assume he did not give his name?"

"No, and I can see now I should have insisted, but I was in a hurry and didn't think it would matter."

"Perhaps he simply left without paying?"

"Well that's what I thought at first, but all his things are still in the room. If he's a thief, he's not one with a head for finances. Replacing those things would almost certainly cost more than one night in my inn."

"Can you describe him?" Teti asked.

"Well I only got half a look at him. He was wearing this big cloak with the hood pulled up. He was pretty average height, maybe a bit on the skinny side. Clean-shaven, handsome from what I could see."

"You said his things are still in the room. May we see them?"

"You mean you'll look into this then?"

"Certainly! It is an interesting exercise, and I think Abrazîr would agree, I am in need of a distraction."

It was only a short walk to the inn, where we were lead to a small, comfortable room on the second floor. Teti immediately began inspecting the area, hunched over, looking at every minute detail of the room. Kulbâth and I stayed back, knowing better than to disturb anything before it had been examined. There was not a lot in the room to look over. A small pack sat by the foot of the bed. The bed appeared undisturbed, and a hairbrush and a cloak-pin sat on a small table beside it. Teti carefully emptied the pack, revealing two sets of fairly non-descript clothes, a fruit pit that Teti declared to be from a mango, and a water skin.

"What do you make of this, Abrazîr?" Teti asked me.

"Well, he does not appear to have slept in the bed," I replied. "Perhaps he knew he was in danger, and was too nervous to sleep. And he left a hairbrush, so it is reasonable to assume he wears his hair long. Perhaps one of those Azûlada rebels? They tend to cling to old fashions like that, and if he was planning an attack it would explain his nerves."

"That's very interesting," Teti said. "All wrong, but not so far off in some ways. Here is my take. He did sleep, but made the bed up in the morning. See how the sheets are tucked differently than our Kulbâth does it. He is a sailor, or has spent a great deal of time among sailors, based on the way he tied the straps on his pack. He is also left handed, and an elf."

"Now you must be mistaken there!" Kulbâth. "I've been around a while, and I've met elves, east and west ones, and I've never met any who spoke our language like this fellow. He had a nice voice, certainly, but he was a native speaker for sure, and from here. What makes you think he's an elf?"

"His cloak pin," Teti explained, gesturing to the brass, star-shaped pin on the table by the bed.

"That is not an elvish design. Ancient, certainly, but I am sure it was made by men," I protested.

"Oh, I don't doubt that," Teti replied, "but it was owned by an elf. Look at the wear here on the back, do you notice anything?"

The back of the pin was dull and tarnished, save for a deep groove where the point met the body. "I can see that there is wear, but I could not tell you what it means," I admitted.

"Well, I suppose it is not a skill most people need. The wear is consistent with pinning a cloak on the left shoulder, and only on the left, as one would do if they were left handed. And here looking at the depth we can see that the pin has been used in such a way for at least one thousand years."

"Could it not be an heirloom of some sort?" I asked.

"That would be a statistical impossibility, to have such a long line of left-handed people, even accounting for your people's lifespans. Perhaps if there were some family tradition to only pass it on to left-handed children, but nothing about the pin would lend itself to that. You observe, of course, that it is intended to go on the right shoulder, with this tip of the star pointing up. On the left shoulder, it is upside down. No, he most certainly is an elf. In fact," he said with a flourish, "if you will indulge me, I have a theory as to which elf. Have you time for a short walk, dear innkeeper?"

Teti led us out of the inn, towards the center to the city. I confess, as we walked down the glassy black pourstone paths, lined with once-white houses now turned grey by smelting smoke, I was utterly baffled as to where he could be taking us, but I trusted that all would be revealed when he was ready. In time, we arrived at the market square by the fishing docks. Even this late in the afternoon, the atmosphere was busy, and the air was ripe with the smell of fish.

"Thank you for indulging me in this," Teti said. "I cannot resist a bit of theatrics. If you look to the center of the square, Kulbâth, I believe you will see your missing guest."

"I don't see anyone I recognize," she said, scanning the crowd intently.

"At the center there, taller than the rest," Teti hinted with a sly smile, "made of stone."

We turned to the statue of Tar-Minyatur that stood at the center of the marketplace overlooking the sea.

"Goodness, Teti, that is him for sure, but how?" Kulbâth gasped with astonishment. "Do you mean to tell me that the long-dead first king of Númenor is still alive? And beyond that, he stayed at my humble inn. Dear me, if I had known the sort of guest he was I would have given him the good pillows."

"No, no, Teti laughed, "nothing quite so fantastic. But Abrazîr has been tormenting me with the pointless histories of your island's rulers, and as I recall, your first king had a twin brother who is counted among elf-kind."

"See, not so pointless after all," I told him. "Though I am surprised you remembered what you described then as useless trivia."

"Well, I had my memory jogged by the morning paper. You see, our mystery elf was arrested last night in connection with the poisoning at the king's spring feast."