Hey guys! Can't keep me away from these two, I just have so much love for them.
This fic contains a mention of Reed/RK900, and an implication of Markus/Simon - if you don't like what you see then don't read it. Spread love not hate!
This was inspired by the final chapter of 'Sonata for the Universe' by Lizzy0305 (if you were ever going to read a 200k fic, I recommend it be this one, even if you weren't, read it!).
It's not necessary to read the other two fics in this series (Partners), but it probably gives some background.
Anyway, here is a Hancon proposal fic for your reading pleasure, hope you enjoy it, much love xox
XOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOX
Hank was collecting his morning dose of caffeine from the coffee van near the precinct, which also sold newspapers and the like in stands in front of the van. Hank had been waiting to the side for his coffee, glancing over the headlines to see what was new in the ever changing world he lived in. That was when he saw it. Those four words that had his stomach clench, his palms sweat, and his heart skip a beat.
'Androids allowed to marry' read the headline of the newspaper.
He stared at those words, printed in large bold letters, his mouth going dry. A million thoughts ran through his brain all at once. How would Connor feel about it? Would Connor want to get married? Did Hank want to get married? Would they be able to because of work? Should he talk to Connor about it? How did one approach the topic without having a decisive conversation? What if one of them wanted to and the other didn't?
"Coffee for Hank…?!" the barista called out, pulling him out of his spiralling thoughts.
Hank took the few steps up to the window of the van and collected his coffee, muttering a quick word of appreciation before hurrying back to the car. It didn't really help that Connor was in the car, he needed time to think about this, it was probably best if Hank figured out what he would want before breaching the topic with his partner.
Hank was in his head the whole five minutes it took them to drive from the coffee van to their car space at the precinct. He hadn't even noticed that Connor had been staring at him for the past three of those minutes. He went to push the car door open, but warm fingers around his other wrist finally drew his attention to the android in the passenger seat.
"Hank?"
"Yeah?"
"Is everything okay?" Connor's LED was still blue, but there was a slight frown dragging the corners of his lips down that Hank wanted to kiss away.
"Yeah, 'course."
"It's like you've been in a whole other world since you got back in the car. Did something happen while you were getting your coffee?" concern darkened those warm brown eyes as they studied him.
"No, no, it's just…" Hank sighed, he knew his partner wouldn't let it go, and he had promised to be more open with Connor. Especially with things that usually made him withdraw into a bottle - not that this was one of those things, but Connor might think it was one of those things - but he needed time to figure this out, he also had to put Connor's mind at ease though, "I got some news…and, I don't know how I feel about it yet. It's-it's not bad, I just…can we talk about it tonight?"
Connor's expression and LED said that he wasn't convinced and was wondering if he needed to be on booze watch that day.
"Don't look so worried baby, I promise I'm good, we're good, just need time to think, alright?" Hank pulled Connor in closer with his own grip and kissed him softly.
Connor nodded, "Okay, we will talk about it tonight."
He still didn't sound like it was okay, but Hank had bought himself the day to consider something that he'd never thought he'd do again; marriage.
Reed and Nines were already there - fucking kiss asses - when Hank and Connor walked into the bullpen.
Nines looked over as they arrived at their desks and immediately requested Connor's help with something.
"I'll be back shortly Lieutenant," Connor announced before he and Nines disappeared back out of the doorway.
Hank nodded and sat down at his desk, logging in and pulling up their recent case files, trying to focus his thoughts on the job and not on his partner and new android laws.
He had no such luck though as Reed sidled over to Hank's desk, there was nothing subtle about his immediate query, "So…things are pretty serious between you and Tin Can right?"
"Reed, I swear to god-"
"So, when's the wedding?"
Hank nearly toppled his chair back in surprise, "I-what?"
"Surely you heard that androids can get married now, and that one is definitely the marrying type," he gestured with his thumb in the direction that the two androids had gone.
In a moment of weakness Hank wanted to ask; 'Do you really think so?' because he was so unsure about the whole thing at that point in time, but this was Reed, and Hank wasn't giving him the satisfaction of cluing into the turmoil in his mind. Instead he kindly requested, "Mind your own fucking business Reed."
"Ooo, did I hit a nerve? Did he say no?" Reed speculated, then he gasped dramatically, "Did you say no?"
Hank levelled him with a threatening glare, but unfortunately the Detective was used to it by now and just ploughed on, "You know, he might only be a tin can, but he's the best thing to happen to you in a long time, the least you could do is let him make an honest man out of you."
Gavin was having way too much fun with this, and Hank was far too conflicted to listen to his bullshit, "Oh yeah? Is that what you and Nines are doing? Look at thine own ass first Reed. Don't think I don't see whatever the fuck is going on with you two. Make sure to send Connor and I an invitation to your wedding."
Gavin's cheeks blazed red and his stance faltered as he stuttered, "I-I don't, I don't know what you're talking about."
"Yeah, sure you fucking don't. Leave me the fuck alone and do some actual police work for once would ya, we got cases comin' out our ears."
Before Reed could respond Connor and Nines arrived back in the bullpen looking confused as to the situation, especially when Gavin scurried back to his desk. The androids looked at each other miffed and then split up to check in with their respective partners.
"What was that about?" Connor asked, leaning on Hank's desk with his behind.
"Reed not knowing when to keep his nose out of places it don't fucking belong," Hank groused, trying and failing to look at his screen and intake anything from it.
"I see," Connor said, but didn't move otherwise, "would it make you feel better to know that we have a lead?"
Hank was up from his chair in seconds, "Why didn't you say so? C'mon, you can tell me about it in the car."
XXX
The lead was actually solid, and it took them to a nice jewellery store in the better part of town. The whole store was practically all glass. Glass cabinets of all shapes and sizes, glass windows, glass counter, all of them were fitted with locks, and probably various other anti-theft features too. The jewellery on display all looked expensive, and the price tags attached to each one confirmed it. Hank immediately felt out of place; he was rough around the edges, and a little slack with household chores, his clothes were out-dated, and he was due for a haircut. The jewellery store was almost hospital clean, not even a finger print on any of the glass, or a speck of dust in sight, it was immaculate – the complete opposite of Hank.
Hank had asked the woman at the counter for the manager, which just so happened to be who they were already speaking to. After showing their badges, Connor launched straight into a series of questions, some textbook and others a little more obscure but still pertaining to the case. Hank let him go and did a full circle of the store, getting a better feel for the place, still keeping an ear on the conversation while he wandered.
Hank had thought nothing of coming to a jewellery store until he spotted the rings. Engagement and wedding rings to be specific. His heart thudded a little faster in his chest as he eyes scanned over them. There seemed to be such a wide variety; silver, gold, white gold, tungsten steel, and 'just in' android metal. Some had patterns, or were two toned, others spotted with diamonds or other precious gems.
Idly Hank wondered what his partner would like. Something durable like tungsten, or something that was more dainty, or maybe the android metal; erase any remaining doubts about their differences. He imagined what they would look like on Connor's hand, some of the android ones lit up like their LEDs. Connor was proud of who he was and had never expressed a desire to be rid of his LED like so many other deviants had. Hank wasn't bothered by it, it was a part of who Connor was, plus it served as a good tell to what was going on in the android's head. Of course if Connor wanted to get rid of his LED Hank would support him, but there didn't really seem a need or want at this point.
Hank sighed quietly to himself and quickly scrubbed a hand over his face, he hadn't even made a decision yet, let alone spoken to Connor about it, and he was already trying to figure out what ring his partner would like. They hadn't even been together that long, maybe he was jumping the gun. Connor was it for him though, there would never be anyone else, did they really need to get married for Hank to prove that?
His mind replayed Reed's words; 'he's the marrying type.' How did Reed come to that goddamn conclusion? What even defined someone as 'the marrying type'? Fucked if Hank knew.
He'd ended up too deep in thought and lost track of the conversation that he really should have been listening to. He glanced up to find the manager looking his way even though she was talking to Connor. Being the manager she probably knew exactly which section Hank had stopped at, and if the little smirk she gave him was anything to go off, he was right.
"I can do you a good price if you see something you like, hun," she offered, interrupting Connor's next question.
Hank tried not to grimace, especially with Connor now blinking at him in confusion, "Uh-huh, thanks," he replied aiming for casual as he slunk away from the rings.
He re-joined Connor and the store manager, asking a couple of his own questions before thanking her for her time. Hank opened his wallet and pulled out his card, handing it to her in case she had any more information for them later.
They promptly left after that, stopping by Chicken Feed to pick up a burger for lunch. Connor berated him for it until Hank pointed out that it was his first burger in two weeks. He needed comfort food to feed his brain that day.
He couldn't believe that he was seriously considering popping the question. He stared at Connor's left hand while he chewed his burger, imagining the different rings sitting there on his second last finger. As Hank continued chomping down his burger, he considered why they should or shouldn't get married. On one hand if anything happened to Hank, Connor – who he trusted more than anyone – would gain everything he owned, it would relieve him to know that Connor wouldn't be left with nothing, and he knew that Sumo would be looked after. As Hank's spouse, Connor would be allowed into spaces that were 'family only, no androids' and…introducing Connor as his husband did sound nice. He could hear the word in Connor's voice in his mind and his heart skipped a beat just at the thought.
On the other hand though…Hank was full of self-doubt. He still couldn't understand how such a stunning being could have fallen in love with someone like Hank. A tiny part of him was waiting for the other shoe to drop, for Connor to see Hank as the old fool that he was and leave him for someone who deserved such an attentive partner. What if Connor hated the idea of being tethered to Hank? Maybe he should just forget about the whole thing…
"Lieutenant?" Connor's concerned tone pulled him from his thoughts.
"Yeah?" he popped the last of his burger into his mouth and licked his fingers before scrunching up the paper.
"Are you sure you're okay?" Connor's adorable freckle covered face had managed to show worry lines, meanwhile his LED spun faster than normal, thankfully it was still blue though.
Hank wiped his hands on a napkin and then moved one hand to cover Connor's closest one, which also happened to have his coin in it – he'd been playing with it while Hank was eating. He gave the hand a light squeeze and then brought it up to his mouth to kiss the back of it.
"Yeah, just a lot on my mind today. You can worry less about me, and focus more on the case though. We'd better get back, case isn't going to work itself," he tried to brush away Connor's concerns, along with his own.
Hank got up from the table and discarded his rubbish in the bin before heading to the car. Once they were on the road Connor spoke again, but he had a different topic this time.
"I was under the impression that you weren't that interested in jewellery Lieutenant…" Connor commented.
"I'm not," Hank replied coolly, not liking this line of questioning either.
"Yet something caught your eye in the jewellery store…" the android continued.
Hank's fingers flexed on the steering wheel, "Oh, uh, I was just sussing out the place, ya know…while you questioned the manager."
"Some of the pieces were nice, I've never worn jewellery before, do you think it would suit me?"
Hank glanced at Connor before turning his gaze back to the road, "Uh, I guess it would depend on the piece and the type of material it was made from."
"Hmm, I noticed that they had some pieces in android metal, some could even sync to my system like my jacket does," he noted thoughtfully.
"We can go jewellery shopping on the weekend if you like…" Hank offered, glad the focus had shifted off of him.
"I would like that," Connor smiled cheerfully, "and I will endeavour to be quicker than when picking clothes."
"Mhmm," Hank hummed disbelievingly, but there was a smile tugging up the corners of his lips as he pulled into his parking space at the precinct.
XXX
No sooner than Hank had gotten comfortable in the chair at his desk, ready to get back on the case, a new case popped up; a homicide.
He and Connor were back in the car on the way to the crime scene within minutes. The sun was bright that afternoon, forcing Hank to don his sunglasses. It always felt wrong to be at a crime scene on a perfectly weathered day, when the sun shone but it was neither sweltering nor freezing, one of those between seasons kind of days that lasted maybe a week if you were lucky.
They stepped out of the car and headed for the house that was taped off and swarming with a ridiculous number of emergency and crime scene personnel. Hank immediately found the cop who was in charge of the scene, he lead Hank and Connor into a middle-class suburban house. The interior was modern but not flashy, a few pieces of cheap but tasteful art hung on the white walls tying the rooms together.
The house was clearly lived in but fairly tidy, apart from the dead body on the kitchen floor, white tiles speckled blue with thirium blood spatter. Two blue pools sat under the victim, one under the head and the other seeped out from the back. The android's thirium pump had also been removed and tossed aside, leaving another blue trail across the kitchen floor.
Hank shook his head at the violent display. He'd seen a lot of shit in the years he'd been a cop, but it never ceased to amaze and disappoint him as to how destructive and cruel his species could be.
"Do your thing kid," Hank told Connor with a sigh.
While Connor examined and reconstructed the scene, Hank gathered his own clues. It was obvious that two people lived in the house, there were photos of them together rotating through in the electronic photo frame, and there was an equally feminine and masculine touch to the house.
"Lieutenant! There's something in her mouth…" Connor drew Hank's attention back to the victim as he carefully pried open the android's mouth, sticking in a couple of fingers to retrieve the item.
A gold ring with a diamond encased in the top stuck out from between Connor's fingers as he held it up for Hank to see.
"It looks brand new," Hank commented, then glanced to the victim's hands, "there's no ring on her finger…proposal gone wrong maybe?"
His own words echoed in his mind, panic rose through his body just like it had that morning at the coffee van; if Connor wasn't aware of the new law, then he was now.
"Hmm, it very well could be," Connor agreed, not noticing how still Hank had become next to him, "I believe that there might be just enough life left in her that if I put her thirium pump back in we could be able to ask a couple of questions before she powers down for good."
"She could name her killer, do it," Hank authorised, he crossed his arms and waited as Connor collected the thirium pump and reinserted it into the victim, "make sure you're recording this so we can use it as evidence."
"Of course Lieutenant," Connor nodded as he adjusted the bio component.
The android's head jolted as she woke up, eyes fluttering, "No! No! Patrick!" she cried before realising something was wrong, "I-I can't move, who are you?"
"My name is Connor, I'm with the DPD, I'm sorry Angela, but you were attacked, I was able to reboot you for a short period. I need to ask you some questions…Do you know who attacked you?"
A look of horror appeared on her features, "Patrick, it was Patrick," her voice, while a little static-y, was heartbroken.
"Can you tell us what happened?"
"He-he," her eyes rolled back for a moment, before she continued, "he came home and told me he loved me, that he wanted to…wanted to spend the rest of his life with me, and that he wanted to marry me. He pulled out a beautiful ring…I was so surprised…we hadn't even talked about it," her voice became more static-y, the life draining from her, it was clear she only had maybe a minute left.
"Then what happened?" Connor prompted, also seeing that they were almost out of time.
"I-I said that we shouldn't rush into it, th-that I wanted to date longeeerrrr. He got upset," tears began to stream down her pretty face, "said-said-said I didn't love him. Said I'm just a machine. Incap-incap-able of…he pushed me…hit my head," her voice was completely computerised at that point and fading fast, "the knife…Patrick! Noooo…" and then she was gone, left completely lifeless on the floor once more.
"My preconstruction matches her story; the assailant, Patrick, shoved her, she hit her head on the corner of the bench, then he picked up a knife from the knife block on the counter and stabbed right through her chest before ripping out her thirium pump," Connor informed Hank as he stood, "I've just lodged the recording into evidence."
"Alright, well, now we gotta find this Patrick. What do we know about him?"
XXX
Hank tried to pay attention to Connor on the way back to the precinct, really he did, but his mind hadn't finished freaking out. Not to mention that the case they had just landed was way too close to home with what was clogging up his thoughts that day.
'Did he say no?' again Reed's words came back to him. What if Connor felt the same as the victim, maybe he wanted to taste more of the world first, try things without Hank, even see other people? Hank wouldn't even be able to blame him; he'd only been alive for a short time compared to Hank, and most of it had been spent solving crimes, negotiating with the government, looking after Hank, and playing with Sumo. He deserved a life filled with experiences, not to be stuck in Detroit with a boring, aging cop.
He glanced at Connor out of the corner of his eye, how could he let him go though? He loved Connor, losing him would break Hank beyond repair for certain this time. Connor was everything to him, including his reason to live. He couldn't lose Connor, but it was the elephant in the room now, for Hank anyway, and they were going to have to talk about it that night like he'd promised.
A double shot of whiskey would surely help the crippling anxiety and nerves. He wouldn't do it, but old habits die hard, and crutches are easy to lean on.
"Lieutenant…are you listening?"
Shit, "Mhmm, yeah, Patrick and Angela had been dating for six months."
Connor frowned, Hank saw it in his peripheral, "I told you that five minutes ago," he sighed, "I wish that you would just tell me what's going on. You've been increasingly distracted all day."
Hank took one hand off of the wheel and found Connor's hand, interlocking their fingers and giving them a squeeze, "I'm sorry, when we're home for the day…" he promised.
"We could call it a day now…" Connor suggested lightly, his full attention on Hank.
Hank huffed a laughed, "I have rubbed off on you in the worst ways kid. A few months ago you would have never considered clocking out early for anything. The cases aren't gonna solve themselves though are they?"
"You have rubbed off in good ways too," Connor pointed out, then pursed his lips, "no, they are not, but you're allowed to take personal time if you need it Hank. Reed and Nines can always take over."
Hank put his hand back on the wheel, "I don't need it Connor, I'm fine, Jesus."
Hank didn't mean to get shitty with his partner. His thoughts and emotions were all over the shop, and he didn't need Connor pushing him. The android was just being a decent person, and partner, he knew that, but he just wanted to be left alone with his thoughts, to straighten them out and figure the whole thing out before he really did have to talk about it.
They sat in silence the rest of the way back to the precinct, Connor stared out the window the whole time, but Hank noticed the bright flashes of yellow among the blue from Connor's LED in the glass. As soon as the car was parked Connor got out and headed inside without waiting for Hank.
Hank couldn't blame Connor; he could be a total ass sometimes. He should have apologised straight away, it was something he was still working on. He rested his forehead against the top of the steering wheel and took a deep breath, attempting to settle his mind and get some focus back for the cases they had to work.
By the time Hank made it to the bullpen Reed was waiting in the entrance doorway, arms crossed and leaning against the frame. Hank rolled his eyes, ready to ignore whatever smart quip the detective had to say.
"What did you do?" Reed queried, he was amused. Hank was not.
"What're you talking about…?" Hank's words faded as he laid eyes on his and Connor's desks. Connor was sitting at his own, back to Hank, but he could see the android's arms moving animatedly as he spoke to Nines. Who was standing in front of him, arms crossed in a stance that looked suspiciously like Reed's. The expression on Nines' face let Hank know that he was about to get told off by the RK900. Fuck.
If he had just apologised, or better yet; not gotten annoyed at Connor in the first place, he could have avoided all of this. Just another mark against why Connor deserved better than him. Why he shouldn't tie Connor down to him. Fucking hell, why was it so hard to figure out what to do? He was in love with the android sitting across from his desk, he made every part of his life that much better, he wanted to spend the rest of his life waking up to those warm brown eyes, loving smile, and constellations of freckles every day. However, it was the dark corners of his mind that cast shadows in the sunshine he had found. Connor shouldn't have to reassure him every day that he deems Hank worthy of him. Shouldn't have to clean Hank up when he falls off the wagon. Shouldn't have to put up with any of Hank's baggage at all.
Hank watched as Connor's shoulders slumped. Nines' mouth moved, but he wasn't a lip reader, so he had no idea what he'd said to Connor.
Suddenly Nines was marching over to Hank and Reed, and Hank steeled himself ready for the storm. It almost felt like some high school bullshit, but Hank knew he would deserve every word to come out of Nines' mouth, and he couldn't expect Connor to be upset because of him and keep it bottled up like Hank did, he had to talk to someone. That someone was usually Nines or Markus.
"He is seriously worried about whatever shit you got going on in your head. With all due respect Sir, pull your head out of your ass. You're just making problems that aren't there. You've got your demons, we all know that, but Connor is the angel on your shoulder. He's in it with you for the long run, don't fuck it up…Lieutenant."
Hank stared, his mouth pressed into a firm line, and Nines stared back. Gavin kept looking between them, waiting for something to explode.
Finally Hank lowered his eyes, all the fight drained out of him as he nodded and quietly admitted, "I'm trying."
"Do better. Come Detective, we've got suspects to question," Nines walked past Hank out of the bullpen.
If Hank didn't know better he'd say that Gavin was turned on as he followed Nines like a puppy – speaking of people who needed to get their shit together already and stop acting like idiots.
Hank ran a hand through his hair as he turned his attention back to Connor. The android was still sitting at his desk but now he was facing the computer, blue LED whirring as he interacted with it.
Hank trudged over to his own desk and sat down. His eyes glued to the android in front of him, waiting for Connor to notice him.
When he didn't, Hank reached over the desk and laid a hand on one of Connor's, "Hey…" he started lightly.
"I'm working Lieutenant," Connor's tone was cold and clipped.
Fuck, he hated it when they quarrelled, it was almost always his fault too, something else he needed to work on, "Connor, I'm sorry, I shouldn't have gotten angry. I know you're just worried about me, and I'm sorry that I give you too many reasons to worry."
"I worry when you don't talk to me. I can't help if I don't know what you're fighting against," Connor finally responded, turning to face Hank instead of the computer screen.
"I know, I'm sorry. I just needed a little time to figure it out myself first," Hank confessed, feeling guilty, "…I love you."
Finally, Connor cracked a small smile, his tone mellowing as he replied, "I love you too. Promise you'll tell me when we get home?"
"Yeah."
Connor nodded and then turned back to his screen. Hank retracted his hand so that he could work on his own terminal. He got as far as logging in and opening the case files before his mind started to analyse what Nines had said to him.
'You're just making problems that aren't there,' Hank specialised in creating more problems for himself. He self-sabotaged, not believing that he deserved the better things in life. Nothing fucking new there; he'd been like that before Connor, he was trying to leave behind bad habits, but it was hard, especially when you were still waiting for everything to go to shit like it usually did.
Nines was right though, of course he was; Hank needed to smarten the fuck up if he actually wanted Connor to stay. He knew from experience that there was only so much a person could deal with before they would throw in the towel, androids included. He couldn't lose Connor, especially not because he didn't put in the effort to make it work. 'Do better,' fuck, he had to try harder, be better, for Connor, but for himself too. He couldn't go through their entire relationship second guessing himself, and his partner. He completely trusted Connor on the job, knew he had Hank's back, and would make the right calls when it came down to it, now he just had to let himself trust the android with his heart one hundred percent.
He wanted to give himself completely to Connor, but he was still scared of losing everything. Maybe…maybe he needed to commit properly, sure they were in a relationship, but people got together and broke up every day. Maybe he need something more solid; a symbol, a gesture, something so that even on his worst days he could be sure that he wasn't alone, that he was loved, that there was a reason to keep going.
'He's in it with you for the long run,' Nines had said…had Connor told him that? Was Connor having the same internal debate that Hank had been all day? What decision had he come to? No, he'd already spent enough time wondering what Connor would want – with no conclusion - he was supposed to be figuring out what he wanted.
What did he want? Truly?
Hank wanted Connor. He wanted to wake up next to him, go to work with him, go home with him. He wanted amazing sex, and lazy weekends on the couch together, he wanted to show Connor his favourite things, he wanted them to go on road trips, and dates. He wanted be with Connor until his very last breath, wanted Connor to be the last thing he saw in this life.
Realisation hit him like rock to the head. He wanted to marry Connor. It was the surety he craved, to know that Connor would be there to the end with him, whether it was five years or twenty five years – unlikely, but stranger things had happened – away. He could chase away the shadows of doubt in his mind, because he would know, he could trust that Connor would be there. Hank would vow to keep improving himself, he'd already quit drinking because of Connor, he could do more. Would do more to keep Connor as his partner…his husband, for the rest of his life.
A weight lifted from him, and he felt like he could breathe a little easier than he had all day. Of course he still had to talk to Connor, the android could still say no. Hank could wait if Connor wanted to wait; they certainly hadn't been together anywhere near as long as he'd been with his ex-wife before he'd proposed to her. He wasn't entirely sure what to do if Connor was definitively against marrying Hank though. Could they just carry on like they were now? Would it tear them apart?
Fuck he was nervous. He tried once more to focus on the case, but failed miserably. He drummed his fingers on the desk, then scratched his beard, glanced at the time, and closed his eyes for a moment. His thoughts were too loud, nerves made his heart pound in his chest, and his hands shook slightly.
Hank stood abruptly, startling Connor, "Alright kid, c'mon, let's go home."
Connor scrambled to follow Hank out of the precinct, reaching the car just as Hank was closing his door.
"Did something happen?" Connor inquired as he got in the passenger side, they were clocking off a little early after all.
"I figured it out," Hank told him as he turned on the car, waiting for them both to be belted in before putting the car into gear and pulling out of the parking lot.
"Figured what out?" the android sounded slightly confused.
"What I want," he answered cryptically before turning on the car stereo, willing the heavy metal music to soothe him the same way half a bottle of whiskey would.
He thought about stopping to pick up Chinese for dinner later, but couldn't bring himself to even think about eating. He just needed to get this out and over with, and if his life wasn't in ruins again afterwards, then maybe he could consider food.
Connor had gotten the message that they weren't talking about it in the car, so they didn't talk about anything the whole way home, building the tension until the air in the car was suffocating. Hank glanced at Connor from the corner of his eye once they got close to the house, the android had his coin out, he was flipping it over and over in his fingers. The LED in Connor's temple was usually a good reference for how an android was feeling, but the manner in which Connor played with his coin was a specific tell unique to Connor. Hank could tell that he was contemplative, curious, and slightly anxious just from the way he toyed with the silver coin.
As they pulled into the driveway Hank tried to convince himself that everything was going to be alright, but the moment he shut the engine off, his brain went into oh fuck, oh fuck, oh fuck mode. He absolutely refused to have a panic attack when Connor hadn't even said no, hadn't even left him…yet – No, shut the fuck up brain.
He threw himself out of the car, slamming the door shut hard enough to make Connor flinch, "Sorry," he muttered.
"It's okay, let's go in before Sumo breaks down the door," Connor said gently, beating Hank to the door and a whining Sumo. He unlocked and opened it to a wall of fur nearly knocking the android down, "Hello to you too Sumo," he chuckled, rubbing the dog's head and sides.
Once Sumo was calm enough to allow them in the house, they both entered, Hank's anxiety levels sky rocketed in doing so. His hands were shaking, so he hid them in Sumo's fur, pretending to just pat his dog.
"You probably need to go out, c'mon buddy," Hank said to the dog, taking him back out the front door to let Sumo go to the bathroom.
He stood in the grass, waiting for Sumo to do his business and stared up at the streaks of pink and orange over the blue as the sun was setting on the horizon. He gulped in air, desperately trying to calm himself. He never used to be like this, only since the accident that took Cole from him, drinking had helped to numb everything, but his new crutch was the opposite. His new crutch made him feel more than he had in a long time, usually it was wonderful. This was important though, Connor was important, more so than anything else in his life currently, and that was what made everything exponentially more terrifying.
Sumo came back to him and Hank sighed; it was time to face the music.
Connor was sitting on one end of the couch as they re-entered the house. Hank dawdled in the kitchen though, getting himself a glass of water, and making sure Sumo had some in his bowl too.
"Hank," came Connor's voice from the couch, Hank chanced a look, "sit," Connor patted the cushion next to him.
The authority in Connor's voice is what ultimately had Hank leave his empty glass on the sink and sit next to the android on the couch. He still didn't speak though, he didn't even look up at that handsome young face, he just stared down at his hands, which he noted begrudgingly were still shaking.
"Talk to me," Connor pleaded, tone softer.
Fuck, just breathe, he could do this, it would be okay… "Can I just…?" he wrapped his arms around Connor's waist, burying his face in the android's shoulder, inhaling his unique scent.
Connor held him, rubbing small circles on his back, "It's okay Hank, I'm here, I've got you."
"I don't want to lose you Connor," he whispered, "and…this is important, but it might change things…" he added as he pulled back in time to see Connor's LED spin faster.
"Tell me what's going on..."
"I-Did you see the headlines today?"
"Which ones?" Connor was clearly accessing them online.
"Pertaining to android laws…"
"Mmm, two android laws passed this week, both were in media headlines today."
"Androids are allowed to get married now," Hank informed him, talking a little faster than normal.
Connor nodded, "I am aware, I helped Markus get it passed. It was a great achievement for us," he said proudly.
"You didn't say anything. How do you feel about it?"
"I'm thrilled that androids are slowly gaining rights, it feels good to have all of our hard work pay off," Connor smiled briefly.
"I mean, how do you feel about it personally?" Hank corrected, waiting on baited breath. Waiting for planets to collide and his world to be crushed to dust.
"Oh, uh…well, I can't say that I've thought about it a great deal. I mean, it would be nice…Connor Anderson has a lovely ring to it I think," Hank's heart skipped several beats, and Connor glanced at him, "but I would never pressure you or anything," he added quickly, "I would be happy either way, I am happy with how we are now. I mean, I know you've been there before, and I don't expect you to want to do it again, which is fine," he continued, on the verge of rambling. "It's nice to have the option though, you know, just in case we ever decide to."
"Connor…" Hank was breathless; he couldn't believe his ears. His brain had finally crashed, he just stared at the android dumbfounded.
"Is…is this what you've been thinking about all day?"
Hank nodded, mouth agape, not quite able to articulate words yet.
Connor looked guilty, "Oh, I'm sorry. I guess I should've told you. I didn't think you would pay so much attention to it since it's not really…on the cards."
"I've been obsessing over it all day because I couldn't just start the conversation when I got in the car…I wasn't ready to have it yet, I didn't know how you felt about it, or what I wanted. What if we wanted different things and it tore us apart? I've been running circles in my head, especially when I saw the rings in the jewellery shop, and then there was the crime scene, and of course fucking Reed and Nines had to put their two cents worth in."
"I suppose it is kind of sweet how much thought you put into it, but you needn't have put yourself through all of that Hank. I promise I'm not going to leave you just because you don't want to get married. One of these days you'll believe how much I love you, and-"
"I want to marry you Connor!" Hank blurted out, heart thumping wildly, eyes wide.
"You…you do?"
"Yeah, I do."
"Are you asking me?"
"Do you want me to ask you?"
"…Yes…" the disbelief at what was happening was obvious on Connor's face and in his voice.
Hank stood, running a hand through his hair and straightening his clothes. He faced Connor and knelt down on one knee, taking the android's hands in his own. They turned white immediately, while Connor's cheeks flushed blue.
"Connor…" he started.
"Oh my," Connor breathed.
"Connor, I could not have asked for a more wonderful partner at work and in life. You better me every day, and make me want to continue to better myself for us both. I want to share my life with you right up until the last moment. You make me feel so much, reawakening parts of myself that I thought were dead. I love you more than I know how to express. I want to open my heart completely and trust you not to break it…Connor, I-please marry me?"
Tears streaked down Connor's blue tinted cheeks, he surged forward, kissing Hank passionately, "Yes! Yes, yes!" he cried in between their lips crashing together.
Hank was so happy he thought his heart might burst with it. Connor had said yes! His mind was reeling, while trying to etch the moment into his memory; he never wanted to forget this night.
"I love you so much Connor," Hank told him while he caressed a freckled cheek, their lips barely an inch apart. He averted his gaze away from those loving, warm brown eyes as he apologised again, "I'm sorry about today, I just freaked out and…needed time to figure it all out. In the end it was simple I guess," he shrugged awkwardly, "I want you, and to know for certain that you are mine always, until the end, and in all things."
"I will be Hank, I promise. I want you just the same, and I love you just as much, possibly even more," Connor replied, a watery grin on his face.
They kissed again, long and ardently, until they ended up half on top of each other on the couch, and breathless. Hank couldn't believe any of it. He'd spent far too much of the day fretting over something that turned out even better than he'd hoped. He needed to have more faith in his partner, to trust him explicitly, and from now on he would, he swore it to himself and to Connor.
"I think we should go to bed…" Hank suggested seductively.
"Mmm, I would like that, but you should eat first, I know how distracted we can get and you won't end up eating otherwise," Connor countered, running his fingers down Hank's arm.
"Why would I want anything else when you look so delicious?" Hank disputed before nibbling and sucking on Connor's ear lobe to prove his point.
Connor's eyelids fluttered, his LED spun rapidly in his temple, "At least feed Sumo, someone deserves to eat in this house," he faltered, voice light.
"Hmm, you're right," Hank concurred. He pressed another open mouthed kiss to Connor's neck before getting up with a groan – fuck being old – and headed into the kitchen to feed his dog, "Hey, Connor…"
"Yes?"
"I love you more."
XXX
Hank kept his promise that weekend to take Connor jewellery shopping, though not for just any piece, but for a ring. They hadn't told anyone yet, well, except that Connor told Markus, who told Carl and Simon, which meant that Carl had messaged Hank to congratulate them and invite them over for dinner. So, more accurately; they hadn't told anyone at work yet. Hank wanted to wait until he got Connor a ring, which Connor had agreed to, mostly because he wanted to be able to show it off when he told people. Maybe rub it in Reed's face a little.
After a quick search, Connor had told Hank that there were well over thirty jewellery stores in the Detroit area, and since they had no idea which one to go to, Hank suggested they start with the one they'd gone to during the week to question the manager.
They stepped into the familiar shop basically made of glass and was immediately greeted by the manager, "Welcome back gentlemen, how can I assist Detroit's finest today?"
"Uh, we're not here in an official capacity today ma'am…I recall you saying something about doing a good price though…?" Hank fished, putting on a charming smile.
"Why yes of course! Do you know what you're after?" she asked, going straight into salesperson mode.
"A ring."
"For someone special?" she inquired, leading them over to the ring selection.
Connor seemed to be slightly distracted, taking in all of the different pieces of jewellery. Hank smiled lovingly in the android's direction, his gaze followed Connor as he inspected the glass cabinets.
"Yeah, he's pretty special," he told the lady, still looking at Connor.
"Oh! I see, well, we have a large range of rings, as you can see, in various materials, including a new range of android metal."
"Connor…come have a look at these…" he called over his future husband – just thinking about calling Connor his husband made him shiver.
"There is a bracelet and an earring I'd like to look at after the rings, if you don't mind?" Connor informed Hank as he came over to stand beside the Lieutenant.
"Sure. Thinking about getting your ear pierced?" Hank asked, trying to imagine Connor with an earring. He supposed it depended on the type of earring, but he thought he would probably like the look on the android.
"Maybe, I haven't decided yet," he confessed, "oh, there are so many rings to choose from."
"Yeah, take your time, try on any you like…" Hank told him, wanting Connor to choose something he truly liked.
Connor ended up trying one in each type of material, the last of which was the android metal. The particular one he had picked out had two thin intertwined lines running right around the band that lit up – one white and one blue - when it synced with an android.
The ring fit perfectly and lit up after a few seconds. Hank thought the light might be too bright and garish on the ring, but it was strangely beautiful. It suited Connor perfectly, it represented who Connor was, and that he was proud of it. It also said that Hank loved him as he was, not despite being an android, but as an android and a living being.
He wanted to tell Connor that he thought they'd found the ring, but it was up to his fiancé. The excitement on Connor's face told Hank that they felt the same way though.
"I like this one," he stated, eyes shifting from the ring on his finger to Hank, gauging Hank's reaction.
Hank grinned, "Yeah, I think it's perfect."
"I saw a matching one in silver…I don't think you're a gold person," Connor pointed out, and the store manager handed Hank the mentioned ring.
It was extremely similar to Connor's, though the two lines didn't light up, but they still intertwined. His smile grew as he tried it on his left ring finger. Surprisingly it also fit perfectly, as if those two rings had been made just for them.
"Hank…?" Connor prompted.
"Yeah, it's nice. I'll admit, I kind of like that they match," Hank acknowledged quietly.
Connor took Hank's hand, his own going white with the touch. They both ignored the small surprised gasp from the woman on the other side of the counter.
"The two lines, that's us…our lives, our hearts intertwined from the moment we met. You can look at this and know that you're never alone, no matter how far away I am, no matter how awful you feel, you always have me."
The pure love in Connor's eyes was overwhelming, and Hank suddenly found himself overcome with emotion, "Fuck Connor, you're gonna make me tear up in front of the lady."
He wanted to kiss the android so badly, but it certainly wasn't going to be a kiss that was appropriate to give in public.
"You and me both hun," the manager commented, "you were right…he is special."
"Yeah," Hank agreed, not taking his eyes away from Connor. The next moment, Connor was kissing him, not quite as deeply or fervently as Hank wanted, but that was for the best considering where they were. When Connor pulled back, a smile brighter than the sun set on his features, Hank turned to the lady, "Yep, we'll take these ones."
She nodded, a small smirk tipped her lips upwards, "Would you still like to look at the bracelet and earring?" she addressed Connor.
Connor looked to Hank, "Go ahead baby, show me what's caught your eye…" Hank encouraged.
Connor's smile was blinding at that point, and as he led them over to a different cabinet Hank knew that he could trust Connor's words, trust what their new rings represented, trust the love they shared. The shadows were fading, and it was a bright, sunny day in his mind.
