Disclaimer: I do not own Naruto.
Chapter 27
Hiruzen silently entered the hospital room, the sight of the bright blond hair on the stark white pillow a sobering sight. He had been dreading this visit, but after talking to Kakashi he knew he had to face the heartbroken boy and offer him whatever advice an old man familiar with the agony of betrayal possessed. His memory flickered with the genin face of Orochimaru, and his youthful, inquisitive eyes which now contrasted so starkly with the diabolical mirth of the crazed man. Yes, Hiruzen knew about betrayal.
He quietly sat in the chair next to the head of the bed. Naruto's eyes were closed and his breathing was even, but Hiruzen knew he wasn't asleep. He waited, trying not to stare at the bandages that wrapped around the tanned chest and up over his left shoulder. Nearly murdered by his own teammate, no wonder the boy is seeking answers for a thousand questions. Hiruzen only hoped he had the right words.
Bringing his gaze back up to Naruto's face he found two piercing blue eyes staring at him with all the judgement of Kami behind them, the same hard glare of Minato, and Hiruzen felt his throat tighten.
"Did you know Itachi was going to kill his family?" The boy's hoarse voice whispered.
Hiruzen's eyebrows raised and his grip tightened on his cane. This was not the type of question he was expecting. His mind was suddenly on guard, assessing the shinobi before him, trying to determine how much he knew and how much he was bluffing.
There had been so many secrets for far too long, and yet the truth was a bitter medicine that choked even the most desperately seeking sufferer, and was better absorbed in small doses. "I had reason to suspect," the Hokage answered cautiously. At this vague response, such cutting disappointment filled those blue eyes that Hiruzen could feel the stab of it in his heart.
The aged shinobi never felt his years so keenly, as he sighed heavily and braced for the retaliation he knew was coming. Kami, I am so tired of all this bullshit. He fixed his subordinate with a stern gaze as he tried to head off the interrogation before it got going. "I tried to stop him, Naruto-kun, but there was a lot more to the situation that you don't understand."
"Help me understand," Naruto growled, his hands fisting in the blankets. "Explain to me how the most promising shinobi of a generation, an ANBU with years of elite training and loyalty, a brother, a BOY, can be allowed by the fucking Hokage to completely wipe out one of the founding clans of Konohagakure?"
"I don't know what Sasuke has told you," Hiruzen snapped, his own ire rising at the disrespect laced within the seething accusation. "But even he doesn't know all that went on, not only that night, but in the weeks and months leading up to it. He has no right to make ignorant assumptions—"
"He has every goddamned right to make assumptions!" Naruto barked, grimacing slightly at the pain that shot through his wound. "It's his family! His culture! His legacy! And by keeping secrets from him you drove him to seek answers from anyone who would offer them. And guess who got to him first? That Snake Bastard and Sasuke's own Kami-forsaken brother!"
"The lies Orochimaru has poured into that boy's already tainted mind should never have been given a moment's credence by Sasuke, any citizen of the Leaf would know that The Snake was not to be trusted." Hiruzen put his full effort into the authoritative tone of his voice. "As a shinobi, a chunin even, Sasuke should have been able to see underneath the underneath and realize that whatever happened that night was in the best interest of—"
"How many ANBU did you send after Itachi?" Naruto lurched upright in his bed, twisting to glare at the Sandaime face to face.
Hiruzen blinked at the abrupt change of direction but did not let the edge of steel slip from his voice. "The village was on lockdown, the police force was gone, I needed everyone here."
"Did you even conduct an actual investigation?" Naruto shot back.
Hiruzen narrowed his eyes. "There was no question as to what had occurred."
"Right, because you already knew!" Naruto jabbed an accusatory finger at him and kept up his demanding questions. "Who helped him?"
Now it was the former Hokage's turn to snarl. "I gave no order for him or anyone else to lay a finger upon a single person. The blood of his people is on his hands alone."
Naruto fell back against the pillows with a huff of disgust. "That was the deal, huh? He takes the fall for you, and you get to deny any participation in the execution of your own village?"
"Watch your tongue brat!" Hiruzen yelled at Naruto with a venom which he had never directed at the cheerful child ever before. The heat of his fury was fueled by his panic to protect the village's secrets, to keep the status quo, to have this precious boy continue to see him as "Jiji" and not as the sinner in saint's robes that he actually was. The faith of this child had been Hiruzen's salvation and he couldn't handle the rejection of another precious person. Overwhelmed by the guilt of his warring emotions Hiruzen collapsed back into his chair, his chin falling to his chest as he stared blankly at the white tiled floor.
"Secrets," Naruto's morose tone filled the empty room, the unfamiliar timbre of defeat weighing down his words. "The answer is always secrets. Keep the Uchiha a secret. Keep the jinchuriki a secret. Keep the son of the Yondaime a secret. Keep the Byakugan a secret. And what is the result?" His fists punched the mattress with lackluster force, punctuating each depressing point. "Sasuke defected because he is an idiot who thinks his revenge is more important than his bonds. I was nearly murdered as a child for being a demon, and now I'm revered for the name I bear instead of the worth of my deeds. The Hyuga have torn their family apart with lies and cursed seals. All of it…for secrets…"
Hiruzen looked at the sadness that washed over the normally bright expression, and his heart throbbed with empathy for the pain the boy was struggling with as he tried to wrap his naive mind around the twisted realities of the adult world. "We are shinobi" he murmured. "Secrets are our business. Our lives depend on the carefully guarded information we possess. It is my job as Hokage to protect the village to the best of my ability by protecting her secrets."
"It is also your job to know when a secret has become poisonous, and needs to be leeched." Naruto sat up again, painfully but unflinchingly staring down the man he had always looked up to as a leader, as family. He saw the condescending pity in Hiruzen's eyes and it sparked his rebelliousness. "I will tell you a secret right now," he said with a deadly calm authority belying his years. "I will never stop chasing my teammate. He is my brother. He is hurt. He is broken. He is a bastard but he is mine. Unless you can tell me a truth that will convince me to stay, I am leaving this village as soon as I am healthy and I will not return until I drag his body back with me."
Hiruzen nearly scoffed, but the look of hard determination in those clear blue eyes made his blood freeze in his veins. This wasn't a threat meant to manipulate information and deals out of an old man, it was a promise. His mind involuntarily flashed back to another teenager, equally promising and talented, who had knelt before him in his office and sworn to him upon his life as a shinobi of Konohagakure. "Hokage-sama, if you do not stop this coup, I will. My own way. I refuse to allow the hubris of my clan to destroy the village. If you claim your hands are tied by your politics and the council, then allow me to be the hand of judgment. I will not fail you. I only ask one thing. My little brother..."
Hiruzen sat still as a statue as a tear rolled down his weathered cheek. The memories of that horrible time washing over him. Damn that Danzo, he had sworn to engage in a full out war within the village walls if Hiruzen hadn't accepted Itachi's offer. His heartless advisors, who were once his closest confidants had jumped at the young man's offer to solve the Uchiha problem which had been festering for years. If only Minato had survived, he had been the only one able to get through to Fugaku. But in the end it was all for naught. As Hiruzen had begrudgingly nodded his assent to Itachi, he could have sworn he felt the Shinigami stake claim to his soul.
And where had all the plotting and secrets left him? His village was broken either way. Yes, thousands of lives had been saved by sacrificing the single clan. But Climbing Silver had always been his least favorite Shogi strategy. And now the ripple effect of that night was building into a tsunami of pain for the future generations. It had all been with the best of intentions, but it wasn't good enough. Perhaps, this secret truly had become too poisonous…
"Lie back, Naruto-kun," his gravelly voice was heavy with defeat. "This is a long story."
His chakra was nonexistent, but she knew exactly where he was just the same. Landing lightly on top of the stone head of his father, she slowly approached him, weaving between the tall rock spikes, and gently taking a seat next to him as he continued to stare at the setting sun.
Hinata relaxed by his side, knowing that if Naruto had something to say the words would readily tumble from his lips. But those lips were pressed together in a small frown that mirrored the furrows on his forehead. So she waited.
Naruto's endless stare was locked onto the disappearing daylight with an absent focus that matched his disorganized thoughts. He had grown up knowing that the world was an unfair and at times cruel place. He had felt firsthand the havoc that the hatred of men could create. He knew in his soul that evil must be ripped out by the roots, or else it would strangle the healthy harvest like the weed it was. He saw that by offering to be the one to eradicate the evil growing within his clan, Itachi was nothing short of a goddamned hero, and by willingly shouldering the burden of their sins and his own, he was a martyr as well. It was heartbreaking. The man should be a savior, and yet for the sake of his little brother he was willing to be vilified as a monster. I see you, Itachi. I will not forget to acknowledge your sacrifice when I reap the spoils of peace that you have sown with the blood of your family. And when I rebuild this place, I will never make a martyr like you necessary again.
And then there was Sasuke, running around like a fucking lunatic with so much misplaced anger that he had turned against his teammates, and then abandoned them for his own violent goals. Worse than scum. The memory of the dishonorable strategy Sasuke had used at the end of their battle still made Naruto's blood boil and his chakra pulse like his pounding heart with the urge to punish him for ever daring to lay a hand on his Hime solely for the purpose of goading his rival. Naruto had trusted him like a brother, bled for him, laughed with him, fought by his side. But when faced with the reality that his venerated clan might not be perfect and his village leaders weren't always beacons of truth, Sasuke had handled it with a furious rage of immature emotions instead of rational thought, refusing to give anyone a chance to explain. Refusing to trust those who trusted him.
Naruto had been up here on the mountain overlooking the village for hours, lost in a state of deep contemplation that most people did not think him capable of. After forcing himself to hear out every last word of Jiji's explanation, he had then withdrawn to a place of safety in an attempt to grapple with the difficult mental transition of a childish adoration of one's heroes, to the broadening perspective of a world forged in imperfection.
When presented with his own rude awakening into the harsh reality of the existence of spectrums of justice in an unjust world, Sasuke had rejected the idea that one must grow up and face the fact that adulthood was full of grays, that nothing was black and white. Instead he chose to believe the false promises of power that greedy Snake offered in order to execute his revenge.
Naruto growled unconsciously, his idealistic heart still struggling to understand the multifaceted situation, but then he thought of the outcomes of all the tragedies. Did the end really justify the means? He guessed that depended on each person's perspective, what they lost and what they gained. Is this what it meant to be Hokage? To sit in the tower and attempt to manipulate fate, and at the same time see into the future to ensure the least amount of loss for the greatest gain?
Sitting up on his father's stone head, Naruto wished he could absorb the man's thoughts up through the rocky skull and into his now heart. His new understanding that the position of glory and honor that he had coveted ever since he was a child had a darker, less ethical side was a bitter realization. The fact that there was an obligation as Hokage to constantly be choosing between the lesser of two evils. Could Naruto ever do that? Could he be strong enough to not only beat any enemy in a battle of chakra and wits, but also strong enough to bear the burden of the village's sins so that they could live in peace and ignorance? Did they deserve that from him? He wasn't sure. To be a shinobi was to endure. But where was his own breaking point?
Naruto's thoughts flashed to the point when he had broken during his battle with the now rogue Uchiha. When he had seen Hime's eyes widen in fear and Sasuke's screeching chidori aiming straight for her heart. I don't think I can ever forgive him for attacking Hime. Naruto had not been bluffing when he had sworn to Jiji that he would chase down his former teammate, but he also had not been exaggerating about dragging the asshole's body back...
Naruto didn't realize how hard he was clenching his fists until he felt Hinata's warm hand cover his own and looked down to see that his heavy thoughts had inadvertently caused his clawed fingers to gouge four deep grooves into the rock. When he forced himself to relax his grip, she threaded her fingers between his, and gently brushed his bandaged shoulder with her other hand. "Does it hurt?" she asked softly.
"No..." he answered, then grabbed her fingers, placing the palm of her hand over his heart, "...and yes." She hummed in understanding as Naruto's head fell back against the stone spike that he leaned onto and he groaned heavily from the bottom of his soul. "I feel betrayed and disappointed and angry and so fucking confused. So many people I trusted, I admired. And no one was as they seemed."
Hinata sat in peaceful patience, allowing her calming presence to wash over his storming mind as Naruto poured out his thoughts and repeated the conversation he had with the Sandaime. The sun had disappeared below the horizon and the stars were twinkling in the dwindling twilight when he finally finished.
As she pondered the overwhelmingly tragic tale, Hinata placed her hand onto his wounded shoulder, channeling a steady stream of healing chakra just like Shizune-neechan had showed her, eliciting a deep sigh of contentment from Naruto, for what seemed like the first time in days as he finally ran out of words.
She let her calm strength seep into her voice as well as out of her palms as she quietly spoke her thoughts. "When I found out that Hizashi was my real father, I initially was so relieved to not be the daughter of Hiashi that it wasn't until a few days into my grieving for Kaasan that it occurred to me that she and Hizashi had been unfaithful. It was rather difficult to wrap my head around, I had always looked up to my Kaasan as this picture of perfection and purity that I wanted to emulate in every way. It made me slightly leery of Otousan for a short while, wondering if he had tricked her somehow, and if he was really worthy of my trust. So I watched him. And I saw him."
The heat of the summer sun that had beaten down upon the rocks all day radiated back out of the stone around them as they sat close together in the cool air high above the village. The lights were starting to flicker on around the streets, like a meadow of awakening fireflies. Hinata didn't notice, her complete focus on the hurting heart of her friend. He had nearly died for her. The sight of his blood seeping between her fingers as his tanned skin turned chalky was something she saw in her nightmares. Ceasing the glow of her healing chakra she unwrapped the bandages from his torso, revealing the delicate pink flesh that stretched over the nearly healed wound. She stared at the scar, Naruto's first one ever, forcing her mind to replace the images of the hole in his chest with the shiny taut skin. He's still here. He's still whole.
"And what did you see?" Naruto asked in a soft voice filled with exhaustion and hope.
"I saw a good man, who wasn't perfect. Who never claimed to be. Who prioritized his loyalties to the best of his ability, who knew when to walk the line and when to step aside and follow his heart."
The evening breeze kicked up, and Hinata reached for her scroll to unseal the blanket that she figured Naruto might need when she heard he had escaped the hospital in little more than bandages and pants. He helped her wrap the warm cloth around the both of them and finally smiled for the first time.
"So you're saying I should forgive them." It was more a defeated statement than a question.
"The Sandaime never sinned against you, it is not your place to forgive him. He doesn't need your approval for doing what he sincerely felt was best. The consequences of his decisions are between him, the Uchiha, and Kami," she gently admonished. Naruto pouted, but nodded slowly. His anger at the former Hokage was based on the misunderstandings of many half truths. Truths the old man had graciously relented to reveal to him, despite being under no obligation to do so.
"And Sasuke?" he asked, tilting his head down to look at Hinata's face. Her dark eyebrows scrunched in a scowl. "He deserves to hear the full truth as well, but he still has to answer for his actions." Her fingers traced the freshly healed skin on his chest, sending goosebumps down Naruto's arms. Thinking he was cold Hinata dropped her hand and instead leaned into his side, making his confused brain feel even more cottony.
Searching for something to say to stifle the suddenly awkward emotions in his chest, Naruto blurted out, "Jiraiya wants me to leave the village with him."
Hinata's head snapped up, eyes drilling into his face, and Naruto was quickly sputtering out further explanations to make that suspicious look go away. "Just a training trip! Nothing more! But he's heard through his spy network about the group called Akatsuki that Itachi joined. What Itachi told Dog in that Genjutsu was no joke. They really are trying to capture all the jinchuriki, they already have one from Lightning and two from Stone. He wants me to go into hiding, so to speak, while I train to become stronger, and help him learn more about this group, so I can better protect myself and the village."
Hinata's eyes hadn't left his face for a single second, taking in his words and turning them over in her mind. Naruto misread her quiet expression as sadness and hurried to add, "of course you can come too Hime! I wouldn't dream of leaving you behind for that long. We can get stronger together! Besides, you're way better at reigning in Ero-sennin than I am, dattebayo!"
The sadness didn't leave her face, and Naruto's teasing smile faded from his own. "Hime?"
"Naruto-kun," her hand came up to his whiskered cheek, "that sounds great, you absolutely should go." Her eyes shone with tears that didn't fall, "But I can't leave now, not with the Hyuga in such turmoil. Everyday Otousan struggles to keep the Clan from falling apart. Every loyal Hyuga is needed, and I cannot abandon my family now, not when they need me most."
Hurt flashed across Naruto's face, and she clapped another hand on his other whiskered cheek, forcing him to meet her gaze and not look away. "Tsunade has offered to train me as well. I can be her apprentice and her assistant, Shizune-neechan is going to run the hospital with Sakura to help her, so someone has to keep the Godaime in line. I have an opportunity to get stronger and protect the village too."
The two friends stared at each other, the realization settling in that for the first time in their lives since they had found one another, they would be separated for a vast amount of time and distance. In unison they reached out to one another with their chakra, instinctually seeking the wordless understanding that they could never achieve even with hours of conversation. Emotions of hurt, sadness, determination, reaffirmation, and affection swelled between them, and finally Naruto sighed. "I see. But damn, I'm gonna miss you Hime."
"I'll miss you too," she said in a hitched voice, wrapping her arms around him and burying her face in his shoulder. He hugged her back with a spine cracking fierceness that had her giggling and twisting for escape. "Who is going to wrap your hands for you, huh?" He teased as she writhed in his death grip.
"I guess I'll just have to do it myself!"
"Who's gonna protect you from all the bad guys, eh?" He smirked trying to worm her into a headlock, except her damned flexibility let her escape with ease.
"Namikaze Naruto are you insinuating that I am weak!?" She asked with sarcastic indignation.
"No ma'am! My clones can attest to that!" She stuck her tongue out at him and whirled to take off, expecting him to give chase as he always did. What she didn't expect was him to snatch her wrist in a tight grasp and pull her back, her surprised face turned to see his serious blue eyes and soft sheepish smile.
"Stay?" Naruto asked in a tone laced with the open vulnerability that he only ever showed to her. It was a question, a childish request for comfort.
"Always," she whispered, and snuggled back into his side.
They sat together late into the night, watching the moon trek across the field of stars, wrapped up in a single blanket and each other's chakra.
Karin glanced up when she sensed the arrival of a new chakra signature at the entrance of the hideout. Sliding out of her chair she quickly headed down the hallways while concentrating on the new presence. Definitely a shinobi, powerful, the tang of ozone about him…must be a lightning nature. And definitely has the curse mark. At the final realization she slowed the urgency of her steps and instead shoved one the nearby guards in the shoulder.
"Can't you feel that you idiot? There's someone coming! Go tell Kabuto and open the damn door," she snapped at a grumbling guard as he stalked off in the direction of the lab where Kabuto could usually be found. Returning to her work Karin put the new arrival out of her mind, snatching the clipboard out of the slot by the door of Hana-san's fake little hospital room. Karin had attempted to bring in a few more creature comforts for the cooped up woman, bullying several other shinobi that made trips down to the nearby villages to bring back a few books of a non-scientific nature and even a warm maroon blanket of soft wool to ward off the chill of the sterile environment.
She paused outside the room, peeking in through the small window of the door, and frowned at the sight of Hana-san curled up with her back to the door, books forgotten at the foot of the bed, and her lunch untouched on the nightstand. Karin had noted that the young woman's demeanor had taken a turn for the pessimistic, pining after her absent lover and fretting that she had displeased him since he had not even attempted to visit her. Karin had caught her talking to the child in her womb, reassuring it that its father had not forgotten them, that he would come eventually and they would be happy together. Words that the kunoichi suspected the expectant mother wished someone would whisper to her. She would keep wishing.
Before she could enter the room, Karin heard her name being called from the hallway, and saw Kabuto gesturing impatiently for her to follow him. Growling, she slammed the clipboard back into the shelf and stomped after his disappearing figure. The Sannin's favorite assistant explained that the new arrival she had sensed was a much anticipated addition to Orochimaru-sama's ever growing collection of rare talent, but had recently been in a battle and needed healing and testing done. Karin glared at the back of Kabuto's gray head as he rambled through his explanations. Great, she thought in annoyance, another lab rat with a god-complex for me to put up with.
"This is Karin," Kabuto announced, sweeping into one of the nicer treatment rooms where a figure sat hunched over on a cot against the wall. "She will see to your healing while I prepare for your stay." The nearly hungry smile that spread across Kabuto's face as he looked at the dark haired mess of a man made Karin want to vomit. And she made sure to step widely out of his way as he exited the room with a low chuckle. Creep.
As the door slid shut she huffed and approached the man, who appeared to be about her age, filthy, and exhausted, but otherwise had no serious injuries. She was glad, she really didn't want another random mouth sucking the chakra out of her body. But that thought froze in her mind when the man looked up at her, revealing a youthful face of perfect symmetry and dark eyes set in pale skin. Well, damn.
Forcing down her flustered reaction to his high cheekbones, straight nose and sharp jaw, she proceeded with protocol.
"Name?"
The newcomer raised a dark perfectly arched eyebrow and Karin mentally forced herself to smash the butterflies in her stomach. "You don't know my name?" he asked in a smooth, deep, and rather smug voice. The arrogance barely detracted from his pleasant features.
Karin rolled her eyes, "You're not the only man in the world, shinobi-san." She made sure to lace her voice with as much sarcasm as she could.
His smirk should be illegal it was so stunning. "I am not just any man. I am an Avenger." At that statement her libido took a distinct nose dive. Ugh Kami, not another one.
"Let me guess," she crooned in a saccharine tone, propping her new clipboard on her hip and sauntering back and forth before him as she adjusted her glasses. "Your family is dead. Either you killed them or some other graphically tragic betrayal took place. You have some ridiculously rare and special kekkei genkai that gives Kabuto a bigger boner than that Snake bastard. You think you have some Kami-sanctioned mission of destiny that makes you immune to their plans. You have abandoned those precious to you in search of power. Your home was full of people who 'just never understood my pain'. And…" she tapped her chin in mock contemplation as his face contorted into a glare that would scare a less jaded kunoichi. "You don't need anyone but yourself." She stopped in front of his furiously trembling form, bending at the waist to look him in the eye over the rim of her glasses. Her red glare met his black one as they stared each other down in the silent chamber. "Did I miss anything, shinobi-sama?"
Had Sasuke not been nearly starving and half conscious from the after effects of chakra exhaustion and his first usage of the second stage of his curse mark, not to mention the days he spent wandering around the countryside following the whispers from the voice in his head to the hideout's location, he might have lashed out at this abhorrent woman. As it was, all he could do was pout like a scolded child, and mumble for her to get on with whatever it was she needed to finish.
The rest of the exam went quickly, with Kabuto returning with a tray of food just as she wrapped up the last page of her charting. With a flip of her flaming red hair she left the head medic to his ass-kissing and didn't look back as she slammed the door shut behind her.
Kabuto narrowed his eyes at the closed door, pausing in his description of the glorious methods and ideologies of Orochimaru-sama. "Ignore Karin's moods," he said with a dismissive wave of his hand. "She is merely a subordinate of mine who needs to be reminded of her place from time to time. As I was saying, the training will begin with…"
Sasuke slowly chewed on his meal, only half hearing the shining promises that came from Kabuto's mouth. He was only interested in what Orochimaru had to say, not this Suck Up. He hated people who couldn't think for themselves, blindly following a leader like they were Kami on earth. Perhaps that was why he was having such a hard time ignoring the spicy woman who had so easily pegged him, much to his shame. She was the exact opposite of the hoards of fan-girls that had followed him throughout his childhood. Her frank assessment lacked all the hollow worship of the adults he encountered, simply because they adored his prestigious name. She obviously couldn't have cared less about his name. This kunoichi would bear watching.
He grunted in agreement with his own thoughts, which Kabuto mistook as an encouragement to continue his goddamned rambling.
As the months passed Sasuke caught glimpses of the red haired kunoichi but never spoke with her again until the day he was wounded during a training exercise with his second stage curse mark. The power had once again gone to his head, and to his eternal frustration he had allowed himself to lose control and overdone it, landing him in her care. By then he had become acquainted with many of Orochimaru's other "acquisitions", and understood where Karin's numbed response to his cocky self assurance stemmed from. But he had also gained a reputation for himself by obliterating every opponent he faced. He was not just another bloodline. He was not just another victim with a grudge. He was The Avenger, and he would deliver justice.
Sasuke waited in his own chamber, resting on his bed, having refused to go to the medical ward to await Karin's attention. He would never admit it, but that place gave him the creeps. The level of experimentation that Kabuto and Orochimaru had dabbled their twisted minds and hands into was disturbing, and Sasuke avoided the labs and everything else at all costs. All he wanted was training, and then he would leave this place just like he left Konoha.
Upon her arrival Karin wordlessly got down to business, and Sasuke didn't engage her. She was studiously avoiding his gaze as he sat up and allowed her to scan over him as she shifted impatiently from one foot to another, and he took advantage of the fact to observe her more closely. Her eyes looked tired, like she wasn't sleeping well, or there was something worrying her. He had discovered through his own methods that Karin's main responsibility was the care of a Hyuga who supposedly carried the child of the deceased Hiashi, and wondered if Karin's current state of fatigue was due to some complication involving the woman.
"Here," Karin's clipped voice interrupted his thoughts. "Bite me." She thrust her hand towards his face causing him to flinch back in surprise. His eyebrows nearly disappeared into his hairline as he looked from her tired scowl to her thin arm and back again. "Come on, I don't have all day. The Hyuga woman is restless and has been bitching all night. I'm tired. I want to go to sleep while I can. Just bite me and get this over with."
Sasuke gently pushed her pale arm away from his face. "Pass."
She grabbed his cheeks, pinching his face hard enough to pucker his lips like a fish and his eyes flew open in shock. No one had ever touched him like that.
"Listen pretty boy," she snarled with sudden venom. "You're not the only 'special' person here. I am an Uzumaki, cursed with a gift for healing that has saved many unworthy men so that they may live to perpetuate the despicable deeds of that disgusting excuse for a Sannin. I've seen the way you look at him and his little puppet. I know you see them for what they are. And unless you can stay strong and continue to train, there is no hope for the rest of us. You may see yourself as one lone wolf out in the world seeking only to avenge your family and your pride. But the reality is you walked into a snake pit full of trapped mice, and without you our hope of ever seeing the light of day again is lost. So suck it up! We all are doing what we can to survive and hold onto the hope that there is something left for us beyond the walls of this hell!"
His mouth was gaping with his surprise and her firm grip, and suddenly she jammed her forearm between his teeth and slammed his jaw down upon it with enough force to pierce her flesh.
The intoxicating rush of her chakra flooding his body had him sucking in his breath at the unexpected rapture. His head swam with the bliss of health as he felt his body ramp up and his skin tingled with a level of euphoria that he had only flirted with in the most heated of battles. He hardly registered the groan that he emitted as he reflexively sunk his teeth deeper into her skin and groped for a foothold in his whirling mind.
The waves of rhapsody slowly ebbed away as his vision focused again, and he found himself leaning heavily against her body, forehead firmly planted on her abdomen and clutching her waist as she swayed dizzily between his spread legs. Her panting exhalations fanned the hair on the crown of his head and her fingernails were digging into his shoulders in a painfully pleasant way, or was it just the remnants of her chakra that made him feel as though every touch was the most intense sensation he had ever felt in his entire life?
"I-I have to go," she choked out in a strangled voice full of a vulnerability that was at odds with everything she exuded in her day to day behavior. Sasuke blinked in tipsy stupefaction as he watched her rush out of his room.
They never spoke of it again. Whenever he crossed paths with her in the long hallways she merely adjusted her glasses and looked away to hide the pink of her cheeks. But he never stopped watching her.
Then came that day.
She had burst into his room, nearly hysterical, completely out of character with her normally brusque demeanor, and collapsed onto the floor, sliding down the shut door and hugging her knees like a child hiding from a monster.
He had frozen, unsure of what to do, but crept towards her all the same, feeling the need to make her heart wrenching sobs cease.
"He's dead, oh Kami, he's dead," she wept into her hands, and Sasuke frowned in confusion. Death was not a stranger to this hell hole of a hideout, but he had never known Karin to care before.
"Get a hold of yourself," he demanded rather gruffly, not familiar at all with how to console a grieving person. "Tell me what happened."
As the story unfolded Sasuke's fury boiled. All the shinobi, and other miscreants, that he had come across in his months here with The Snake were volunteers of varying degrees of intelligence. People who had sought out Orochimaru or allowed themselves to be recruited under delusions of false grandeur, but volunteers all the same. But this Hyuga woman was truly a captive, and her child was destined to be nothing more than a pawn in the twisted web of Orochimaru's machinations.
At least he was, until today. It seemed that there had been a complication, and the child had died within the womb, and the heartless Kabuto had forced Karin to participate in the delivery of the stillborn, only to witness him rip the child from the grieving mother's arms. Sasuke felt his Sharingan flare at the thought of any child being taken from its mother, its only family, dead or alive. Thoughts of his own mother flashed through his mind and he reflexively reached out to Karin, not fully comprehending how he knew, but understanding that she needed him.
"He-he took the baby's eyes," she cried into his chest, not hesitating to accept the comfort of his awkward embrace. "That's all he wanted anyways, the fucking piece of shit! And now she won't eat, she won't drink, she's dying for her child, and I have nothing to offer her. Damn it!" Her hands gripped his arm as she nearly screamed in anger. "I hate this place! I hate them! I hate their plans! I would do anything to stop them, anything to give her peace…"
Sasuke couldn't agree more, but the words stuck in his throat. All he could do was pat her back as she sobbed into him, while his mind raced with plans of his own. He had come her looking for power, slaughtering the innocent was never part of his plans for raising himself higher. It was exactly the kind of evil he sought to punish. This whole operation Orochimaru and Kabuto maintained was not about increasing power through training and learning, this was about manipulating the weak to serve the strong, while stealing everything in between. Power was about going up against the best to prove your worth, prove your strength, and thereby prove the justice of your beliefs. This was…despicable. The curse mark throbbed on his neck, but after the months of mental and physical training he easily subdued it, navigating the lustful inclination for blood towards his own purposes.
As his thoughts whirled and the realization of his circumstances became clearer in his mind, Sasuke held Karin until she fell into a fitful sleep.
Several days later during another training exercise Sasuke overheard Kabuto reporting to Orochimaru. The Hyuga woman was fading, her desire to live seemingly sapped by the loss of her baby and the continued absence of Hiashi, which she took as an act of disapproval of her failure to deliver a healthy child. This was all unsurprising to the Uchiha, based on what he had learned already. It was The Snake's response that made his gut twist.
"Put her in a coma. We will just have to inseminate her in order to obtain more children. But under no circumstances are you to let her die."
The plan was simple. The best ones always were. But even the best laid plans could be difficult to carry out.
Sasuke grunted as he leapt to the next tree branch, the body on his back heavy and unwieldy with its dead weight. The moonlight was all that lit their path as they worked their way swiftly through the dense forest.
"How much further?" he grunted, not looking but knowing Karin was next to him, the small bundle clutched tightly in her arms.
"Another ten minutes. Don't worry, we aren't being followed."
They stopped at the edge of a meadow, blanketed in the snow of the late winter. The ground glowed in the full moonlight that gleamed off of the sparkling white scenery as Sasuke gently dropped his burden onto the ground.
"There, by the two tall trees," Karin whispered from beside him. He nodded wordlessly and with a quick katon jutsu the snow was melted away and the earth lay exposed. The months of training with multiple natures had paid off in an odd way, as Sasuke used a simple doton to carve out a single, deep grave, and the two of them reverently laid the mother and child to rest in each others' arms, wrapped in a woolen maroon blanket.
They worked quickly, always aware of the possibility of being caught. Sasuke stood watch as Karin carefully carved the mother and child's kaimyo into the fresh powder nearby, a temporary but safe homage to the tragedy of human greed.
Her sniffling followed him all the way back to the hideout. As they neared the last kilometer to the secret entrance, Sasuke stopped abruptly on a branch. Karin landed next to him, perplexed, but silent as she continued to struggle to get her emotions under control.
"You did the right thing," Sasuke said, bluntly attempting to offer comfort despite his obvious lack of skill in the area. "She was begging to see Hiashi, and her babe, and her life was already withering as it was. You spared her from an existence of suffering at Kobuto's hands."
Karin stared blankly ahead, then lifted her gaze up to the cloudless sky, her breath puffing out like clouds in the freezing midnight air.
"I am an abomination," she whispered. "I was meant to be a healer, gifted with a kekkei genkai that can bring life back to those whose soul is already reaching for the embrace of the Shinigami. But what have I to show for my honor? I take life from the innocent. Save the wicked. I am doomed."
Sasuke moved without thinking, sensing that she was on the edge of some fateful decision that could end her existence, remove her from him permanently. And for some reason he couldn't bear the thought. Couldn't comprehend the idea of walking down the halls and not running into her beaming red hair. Of entering that cold medical wing and not feeling her warm fiery presence. Her faith in him, her hope in his ability to free her, it was all that got him out of bed some days. The desire to see her safe was an inexplicable dream that haunted his sleep more and more often.
"You are a survivor," he grit out between clenched teeth, and she turned her flat expression towards his face. "You are a mercy in the harsh reality of this world. A candle in the darkness. It takes a strong soul to bear the sufferings of the wounded and sick, and your gift is not in your ability to heal them but in your capacity to care, despite the lack of caring you received in return."
Her red eyes widened in open dismay and surprise, the vulnerability she kept so carefully hidden behind the facade of harsh anger on full display in her unguarded expression. The burden of the suffering she shouldered resonated in Sasuke's soul, and he automatically reached for her, pulling her to him, knowing how it felt to be so alone, and so scared of showing it.
"Don't give up," he murmured into her hair, as she fell apart anew against him. "I will never give up, I will end this. I will deliver justice for all of us. Just don't give up on yourself. Don't give up on me…"
Her arms wrapped around him as she whispered the thing she never thought she would ever say again. "I…I believe you."
