Disclaimers: I own nothing or anyone associated or affiliated with TNA. I own only the original characters. This is just a fictional story that came from my imagination.
Chapter Content & Trigger Warnings: Some drinking and some angst.
Chapter 4
Joe stood near the buffet table, gulping another glass of champagne while he watched Ella interacting with their friends. For the life of him, he could not figure out what had gone wrong earlier. The alcohol probably isn't helping with that, he thought. He realized Christy hurrying up to him and asking to dance probably wasn't good, but there was nothing he could do about it. He'd politely told the fiery redhead he didn't feel up to dancing, and walked away. He had broken up with her a couple years prior and while the relationship had ended on good terms for the most part, he felt she still hadn't fully accepted the fact that they were over.
By the time he spotted Ella again, she was in a corner of the dance floor dancing it up with Angelina, Talia, Daffney, and a few other TNA Knockouts. He bitterly noted the group also contained a large number of TNA's male population.
"All I've got to say is, Shelley better keep his hands where I can see 'em," Joe muttered under his breath, watching as Alex and Ella paired off to dance through the rest of the upbeat rap song currently playing. She looked as if she was truly glad to be with everybody.
I wish I could get her to smile like that, he thought wistfully, as he stared. At one time, I was able to.
All of a sudden, he heard the group shout Shelley's name, and then Ella all but jumped into Alex's arms, covering his mouth with her hand. Joe instantly bristled, wondering if Alex had said something inappropriate to her. But then Ella shrieked and began wiping her hand across Alex's shirt, laughing all the while. In the next instant, she was hugging the Machine Gun. He could see her mouth moving as she spoke to Alex, and would have given anything to know what she had said.
"Bro, just go dance with her on the next slow song and talk to her."
Joe turned to see AJ standing next to him, getting a glass of punch. "I don't get the feeling she will dance with me, but I'll give it a shot."
"Eh, she will," AJ assured him. "Just out of curiosity though—what will you say to her?"
"That I have feelings for her," Joe answered. "What do you think I'd say to her?"
"And how did this happen," AJ prodded, ignoring Joe's question. "And when?"
"What is this? An interrogation? What business is it of yours," Joe demanded, wondering if AJ didn't have something going on with Ella himself.
His older friend went from smiling to dead serious in the space of a microsecond. "It's my business, because I don't want to see her hurting like that, ever again. You weren't with her the night of your birthday, Joe. I was. She cried herself to sleep in my arms."
Joe cursed softly and sighed, hanging his head. He hadn't realized up to that point how deeply he'd hurt Ella.
AJ continued, "When you emailed her back then—She replied back, didn't she? She told you she needed to get over you. Remember?"
Joe nodded, humbled by what AJ had just told him.
"Ella is yet to get over you. So, Joe…" he moved directly in front of his Samoan friend, determined to make himself crystal clear. "You better be honest with her. Don't play with her feelings. If you tell her you're falling for her, you better mean it. Because if you hurt her again, I'll give you a beatdown you won't forget."
"I don't want to hurt her again," Joe said defensively. "I didn't want to hurt her the other time. If she'd been older then…something would have happened between us. I know that now. We had so much in common. And she saved my life for crying out loud—we've had a special bond ever since then. Or we did. She was just so young—too young. And now she's...older. And she's just the same," Joe rambled, realizing how ridiculous he sounded. "Only she's…"
"Gorgeous," AJ suggested with an amused smile on his face.
Joe nodded. "She's just as gorgeous on the outside as the inside," he blew out a frustrated sigh, and sharply turned his head from side to side, popping the joints. "I should never have dated Christy. It screwed everything up. I should have waited on Ella. But I didn't know then. I just didn't know."
AJ chuckled, and shook his head. He had never seen his friend get so worked up over a girl.
"What's so funny," Joe demanded, his black eyes blazing. He realized the champagne and peppermint Schnapps he'd consumed since his interaction with Ella was fueling his temper, but couldn't seem to control his emotions.
"Well, earlier—before we had this talk—I saw the way you looked at her," AJ explained. "I just assumed you noticed her looks, and your feelings went no further. But you really do care about her, don't you?"
The anger left Joe's face, and he looked almost defeated. He ran his hand through his thick, black hair. "I've always 'cared for' her, AJ. I think it's a lot more than that now. It's almost like love at first sight, only it isn't 'first sight'," he groaned in frustration. "But that's insane, right? I mean, we've always just had a close friendship, and... I'm totally buzzing. I'm talking crazy. It's got to be the alcohol talking."
"I don't think so," AJ countered. "If the way you were looking at her before you'd even drank anything is any indication, you're crazy about her. Joe—if you want my advice, I say go talk to her," he said. "No, it's not exactly love at first sight, but it almost falls into that category. Tonight's the first time you've seen her since she was a kid. You're just now getting to see the woman she's become. So, just go tell her how you feel. And don't water it down. She's a passionate girl and she'll appreciate you being the same way. Be honest, and let her know what she means to you." He looked over his shoulder and spotted Ella getting on the dance floor with Matt Morgan. "I'd hurry though, if I were you. Morgan's already putting the moves on her."
Joe spun around to see Ella, indeed, was in Matt's arms, dancing to a slow song. "The Way You Look Tonight" by Frank Sinatra, no less.
She has no business being around Morgan, Joe thought, eyeing her as she danced with Matt. He may not respect her. What if he tries to…
"He's too old for her," he uttered to himself.
"Head's up, Joe," AJ chuckled. "Matt is only a year older than you. And Ella is eighteen now. She's legally able to date any man in this room."
"Over my dead body," Joe growled and headed toward the two.
He saw Ella smile shyly up at Matt and his blood began to boil. I realize I've screwed things up royally, he thought, but there's no way that Morgan's moving in on her. He stepped up to the pair and gently removed Ella's hand from Matt's shoulder, "Mind if I cut in," he asked, a definite challenge in his dark eyes as he stared the taller man down.
Matt started to open his mouth to send Joe on his way, but there was a possessiveness in the man's eyes he did not want to mess with.
"Sure, why not," Matt said, "I'll catch you for a dance later. Right, Ella?"
Ella giggled, "Sure. I'd like that."
"Not likely," Joe muttered, as Matt walked off. He pulled Ella into his arms then and flashed a mischievous smile at her, a dimple appearing in each of his cheeks.
"Excuse me? I'll dance with who I please," Ella told him firmly, trying to ignore the adorable smile. The feel of his arms around her was so painfully familiar. Her breathing quickened. "You have no claim on me, Joe. You never did."
"Can we talk after the dance," Joe asked. "This is a perfectly good song and you're wasting it," he teased, trying to keep the mood between them lighthearted.
"You listen to Frank Sinatra," Ella asked skeptically, lifting an eyebrow.
"On occasion," he answered. "When one of his songs is playing in a movie or something."
"Ah, why am I not surprised?" Ella found herself joking with him.
His arms tightened around her waist then, and she fought to keep her breathing even. "Did—did you dance with Christy earlier," she asked, trying to get Joe to focus on his girlfriend rather than her.
I can't go through anymore heartache with him, she thought, a dull ache manifesting in her chest and throat. God, please, don't let this happen again. She watched as he took one of her hands in his and held it against his chest. She could feel his heart beating rapidly beneath her palm, almost in time with her own. She looked up into his handsome face and found his eyes on her face as well.
"No, I didn't. I wanted to dance with you," he finally answered.
"Joe—this isn't right—you should go-"
"Ella, I broke up with Christy a couple of years ago."
"Oh."
"You don't know how much I've missed you, baby girl," Joe said softly, playing with the silky ends of her hair as they danced. He released her hand, and brushed his fingers over her neck, tenderly stroking the soft skin with his thumb.
Ella averted her eyes, as his roamed over her in an intense inspection. He was stirring up feelings in her she had tried to ignore over the years. Butterflies invaded her stomach, and her pulse throbbed in her chest. "I'm sorry that I left like that—after your birthday," she said. "And I've missed you, too. So much it hurt."
"AJ told me the truth about why you left early that day."
"Oh," Ella flushed drastically and looked away, humiliation written across her features. "I worried he might do that." She forced a chuckle, and still avoided his eyes, "You don't have to worry, Joe. It's been three years. I've gotten past…all that."
Liar, she scolded herself.
He pulled her close against him then, and whispered huskily in her ear, just as the romantic song ended. "The morning you left, he said you were in love with me."
Mortified beyond belief, tears stung her eyes. "Why are you trying to humiliate me," she whispered, a tremor in her voice. "I feel foolish enough. I realize leaving the way I did was rude, but you don't have the right to treat me so-"
"Oh, Ella," Joe breathed, reaching up and placing his finger over her lips. "I don't want to humiliate you, baby. I hoped you would say you still felt the same way."
She gaped at him, "W-what? Why? What does it matter if I do?"
"It matters because, ever since I saw you earlier, I haven't wanted to look at anyone else. I can't think about anyone else."
Ella swallowed hard. Was he saying what she thought he was trying to say? Was he about to confess new feelings he held for her? It was what she always dreamed of. It was too good to be true. Calm down, Ella, she thought. He's just being nice. He couldn't have fallen for you in a matter of minutes.
"Joe…don't."
"Don't what," he asked, his onyx eyes scanning her face intently. They stopped at her mouth and lingered there.
"Don't hurt me. Not again. Please."
"I never meant to hurt you."
Ella nodded, "I know. But you could very easily do it again without meaning to. So please, leave it alone. Let's just stay friends."
A rhythm and blues cover of "When I See You Smile" started playing on the sound system, the bass pitches of the song booming through the speakers. Joe began moving to the music with Ella again. "Do you know this song," he asked her.
She glanced up into his face, confused by his sudden change of subject, "Yes, fairly well."
"Sing it for me."
"I can't," she whispered, struggling for an excuse. "I've never practiced it."
"That's perfect," Joe told her. "I don't want to hear you sing it strictly from memory. I want you to sing it how you feel it." He danced them over to the French patio doors and gently whirled outside with her. "There, now we have a little privacy."
With apprehension still etched on her face, Joe turned his head, angling it downward and kissed the inner side of her bicep that rested against his shoulder. "Please, Ella."
The moment his lips scorched her skin, she felt as if she would drop. "You're not playing fair," she said breathlessly, clinging to his neck so as not to fall.
"I'm not playing a game," Joe whispered, stroking her hair. "I'd give anything to hear you sing to me again."
Ella felt tears of anger threaten to spill from her eyes. "Why," she demanded, pulling out of his arms and putting some distance between them. "What's changed? Why are you all of a sudden acting as if you're attracted to me? I'm the same girl. Yes, I wear makeup now, I fix my hair, and I'm not a tomboy anymore. But that's just my outer appearance, Joe. If that's all you care about, you'll be sorely disappointed. Inside, I'm no different than I was three years ago. Except…" she trailed off and turned her back to him, wishing she had not even started the sentence.
"Except what," Joe prompted her.
"I'm empty."
Joe felt as if he'd been punched in the stomach. How could I have hurt her so horribly? He crossed the large patio within three steps, and pulled Ella into his arms. "Oh, baby—I'm so sorry. I never meant for anything bad to happen."
"I know," Ella whispered, trying not to notice the sweet, clean smell of his cologne, or the feel of his warm hands caressing the bare skin of her back. "But, something bad did happen. And I lied—I can't seem to get past it at all. I can't get over you, Joe. And God knows I've tried. So please, don't do this…"
"I don't want you to get over me," he whispered. He realized that sounded beyond self-centered, but he needed to break through the barrier she had put up. He had to do whatever it took to wear her down.
She gasped, initially shocked by what he'd said, but then her defensive shield covered her heart once more. "You need to leave me alone, Joe. I'm not going through this with you again. I'm not."
Refusing to listen to reason, he brought his hands up to her hair, brushing it over her shoulders, and then he framed her face with his fingers, tilting her head back as his face lowered to hers.
Ella's heart fluttered when she realized his intentions. He's going to kiss me, she thought in a mixture of horror and hopefulness. She knew she should stop him. She should not let it happen. But, in spite of her words, she wanted it so badly. So incredibly badly. She could feel his warm, sweet breath brush over her chin as he drew her closer, and closer. "Joe…" she gasped, only centimeters away from his mouth. "Please…" She was not sure if she was begging him to stop, or to kiss her senseless.
"'Please' what," Joe asked softly, releasing her face and nuzzling her neck. He wanted her to long for his kiss till she trembled. He inhaled her subtle, sweet scent and savored it, knowing nothing would ever smell as beautiful to him as she did.
Ella felt his lips barely brush over her jaw, then trail down to her throat, placing soft, gentle kisses to the delicate flesh. She whimpered softly at the tenderness of the touch and gripped the lapel of his suit jacket. "Why are you doing this to me," she asked, a tremor in her voice. "It isn't fair."
"Why isn't it," he asked, moving his kisses to her bare shoulder.
"I've told you why," she told him breathlessly. "You're going to hurt me…you may not realize it…but you will. I'm not like Christy, or Talia, or Angel. They're…a-all beautiful, and I-" she inhaled sharply, as Joe's teeth nipped her collarbone. "I don't know what it is you want from me, Joe. You've not told me why you all of a sudden…feel…I don't even know what you feel. I don't know if you are just attracted to me, or if you care about me…that much can't have changed in a matter of minutes, Joe. You've got me so confused. What is going on?"
He looked into her sapphire eyes, and swallowed hard. "It sounds crazy. You wouldn't believe me."
"Try me."
It was Joe's turn to be nervous as he tried to gather his nerve. He looked down at his feet briefly, and Ella took the lack of eye contact as a negative sign.
"Right," she said, anger entering her eyes again. "Just keep your lips to yourself, Joe Seanoa." With that, she stalked away from him and reentered the party, slamming the door behind her.
"That went well," Joe muttered sarcastically, as he cracked his knuckles in frustration. Sitting down in a patio chair, he drummed his fingers against the table top in front of him. "Why can I not tell her the truth," he asked himself. Then he groaned. "Because I haven't even officially admitted the truth to myself yet." He paused, knowing how insane it was going to sound. "I love her." Strangely, the words brought him relief to say them. "I love Ella."
"Ya know…telling yourself, isn't going to win her over. You have to tell her."
Joe turned around in his chair and saw AJ shutting the patio door behind him. He pulled up a chair next to Joe and sat down. "She looked pretty upset when she came back inside," he said. "What happened?"
"She was apprehensive, as I knew she would be," Joe said softly. "She wanted to know there's more to my feelings for her than just a physical attraction. I tried to let her know I'm attracted to everything about her. But try as I might, I couldn't get the right words to come. I wanted to tell her I'm in love with her, but it sounds crazy—even to me—since we've never had more than friendship between us. So I was cautious about telling her. I guess my hesitation made her feel like I was just playing her. And of course, it didn't help that I spent more time kissing her than I did talking. I've screwed up yet again, AJ."
"Yep, you have," AJ agreed. "But it's not too late. You can fix it, if you try."
"How?"
"Tell her the truth. Let her know you were afraid of how she would react. Do something romantic."
Joe smiled. "You're right. I can fix it. We're talking about Ella for crying out loud. She is the most forgiving person I've ever known."
AJ clapped him on the back, "There ya go. Now get to it."
The two re-entered the party, and Joe felt much more optimistic than before.
}i{}i{}i{}i{
"Whoa, what's with Ella," Angel asked, watching as her friend came in from outside. "She looks really...angry." The others looked to where Angel pointed and watched as Ella stalked across the dance floor.
"Well, that's a girl on a mission if I ever saw one," James drawled, adjusting his cowboy hat. "Someone's in trouble."
"And twenty bucks says that 'someone' is Joe," Sabin chuckled, as he watched AJ and Joe also come in from outside.
The gathering of friends saw Ella approach Matt Morgan and a moment later, the two were dancing to a slow country song.
"Forget that bet," Robert said. "I bet fifty bucks we're about to see an unsanctioned Last Man Standing match right here and now." He motioned, with a nod of his head, to Joe staring at Ella and Matt. "Between a rookie with something to prove, and one big, pissed off and territorial Samoan."
"And Ella-" Talia gasped, watching as Joe approached the dancing pair. "She'll be in the big middle of it. Guys…" she stared in disbelief as the men among the group simply stood and stared. "Guys, are you not going to stop a fight from breaking out? Ella could get hurt!"
"No way," Alex laughed as he watched Joe address Matt and Ella. "They'll make sure to get away from Ella before they throw punches." A few seconds later, Matt's fists clenched at his sides. "This ought to be good."
"I'm just glad it's not me Joe's beating up on, for once," Sabin added, high-fiving Alex.
"I can't believe you idiots," Angel exclaimed. Then she and Talia gasped as Joe drew his fist back at Matt. They went running and caught both of Matt's arms as Ella dove in front of Joe and held his arm by the wrist.
"Guys! Stop! This is a party," Angel exclaimed, getting between the two men with Ella and Talia.
"That's right. It's a party, Joe," Ella said through clenched teeth. "I'll dance with this whole room of men if I want to!"
"I don't mind if you do dance with the others," Joe retorted, enunciating 'others'. "I trust them."
"What's that supposed to mean," Matt demanded. "What do you think I'm gonna do? Seduce her right here on the dance floor, in front of her uncle and parents?!"
Joe's nose snarled for a brief instant, "Do NOT talk about her that way."
"Joe, stop it," Ella cried. "He didn't mean that, and you know it!"
"Ella."
They all turned to see Jeff coming up to them.
"I was wondering if you'd mind singing and playing a few songs. I think it would give us a nice break from the CDs."
Ella could see that Jeff knew perfectly well what was going on, but he was trying to handle the situation in the quietest way possible. Approaching Ella and getting her away from Joe and Matt seemed as good a way as any.
"Sure, Uncle Jeff. I'd love to."
And I've got the perfect song, she thought, casting a wicked glare at Joe. She headed up to the front of the room and picked up the guitar from its stand. She quickly found the opening chord and began strumming away as she sang softly.
The smell of your skin lingers on me now
You're probably on your flight back to your hometown
I need some shelter of my own protection baby
To be with myself and center, clarity
Peace, Serenity
As she reached the chorus to the song, she belted it out, hoping to get her point across to Joe.
"I hope you know, I hope you know
That this has nothing to do with you
It's personal, Myself and I
We've got some straightenin' out to do
And I'm gonna miss you like a child misses their blanket
But I've got to get a move on with my life
It's time to be a big girl now
And big girls don't cry
Don't cry
Don't cry
Don't cry"
She softened her tone again and deliberately made eye contact with Joe as she sang the next verse.
"The path that I'm walking
I must go alone
I must take the baby steps 'til I'm full grown, full grown
Fairytales don't always have a happy ending, do they?
And I foresee the dark ahead if I stay"
Joe's intense black eyes radiated with something other than anger.
Pain, she wondered, glancing down at the guitar. Surely not.
It could not be hurting him as much as it hurt her.
She managed to sing through the remainder of the song, trying not to think about the lyrics as she sang them. Because she knew if she did, she would never be able to finish it. Tears burned her eyes, but she successfully fought off the lump threatening to form in her throat.
She strummed the last couple of notes on the guitar, and then Jeff approached and announced that midnight was only seconds away. He looked at his wristwatch and then after a couple of seconds, he began counting down from ten. The whole room joined in except for Ella. She took the moment to flee. She hurried across the large room and ran out the patio doors, closing them behind her. She couldn't witness the New Years kisses. Especially if, despite what he had confessed, Christy planted one on Joe right in front of her.
She approached the deck's railing and braced herself against it, finally letting the undefeated tears fall. She felt badly for blatantly throwing the song in Joe's face. He would be angry with her now. Or hurt. Either way, he probably hates me, she thought in sorrow. He won't want to be my friend anymore. Not that I can blame him. I just didn't know what else to do. I can't risk getting hurt again. I had to do something to make him leave me alone.
Suddenly, there was joyous laughter and party guests shouting 'Happy New Year'. "Auld Lang Syne" could be heard playing on the sound system. Between the happy shouts, the music, and the hard sobs racking her body, Ella didn't hear the patio doors open.
She did, however, hear them slam shut. She spun around and her gaze instantly fell on Joe's angry face.
He stared her down, an unmistakable fury brewing in the depths of his sable colored eyes.
