Chapter 12: Plan B
Lucy sat alone in her room staring at the empty cot in front of her; the memory of Wyatt sitting there, full of concern and pity, weighing heavily on her mind and heart as she considered the promise he had made to her that day. She was distraught then, as she was now…feeling like she had lost everything, but Wyatt had taken her up in his arms and promised, as he offered her a comforting embrace, that despite whatever she may have believed, she hadn't lost him.
How she wished that were still true.
Everything she had feared had cruelly and suddenly come to pass. Rittenhouse had brought Jessica back…and done it while she and Wyatt were trapped in the past. Both of them now forced to remember and live with the pain and guilt that one could only feel from unwittingly engaging in what could only be deemed, from the scrutinizing looks of Agent Christopher, Mason and Jiya, as an extra-marital affair.
How Wyatt was faring in all of this, she could only guess…though she imagined his guilt surmounted her own. Jessica had been his lightning bolt, his reason for living…and yet he had, just hours before, declared his love to her…Lucy. He was a man torn in two and while he may very well love her, the woman to whom he was bound not only had the benefit of a prior claim to his heart, she had been, for the past six years, his greatest regret.
In this particular battle, there was no competition. Jessica would always be first and foremost in Wyatt's heart and mind.
Silent tears fell from her eyes as she recalled the look on his face when they had come back from 1919 to find that things were not as they left them. Confused, he had followed her into what was once their shared bedroom, only to see, as she did, the tell-tale signs that whatever they were in this timeline, they were most certainly not a couple. "What the hell is Plan B?" he had asked, unmistakable dread sounding in his voice.
Lucy couldn't bear to look him in the eye, the shame and agony of not only being relegated to "other woman" status, but knowing, as she did, that she had actively sought to keep Wyatt in the dark about a possible reunion with his beloved wife was enough to send her running from the scene of what she considered her many crimes…but as she left the privacy of the bedroom, she realized that there was no place she could really go. The underground bunker was a cage and she was trapped. The walls were closing in as she slunk down, helpless, onto the cold hard floor, her head cradled in her hands.
Wyatt was hot on her heels, determined to get answers. Seeing her sitting on the floor in the hall, crying, caused the rising panic he had been feeling to hit tidal wave proportions. "Lucy, what the hell is going on?" he demanded. "What is Agent Christopher talking about?"
Lucy pursed her lips and cried bitterly. "Jessica." she finally gasped out. "Jessica is alive."
Her words, though spoken in a voice that was hardly more than a whisper, seemed to reverberate off the metal walls and echo throughout the entire bunker. They seemed to mock her as she sat there looking up with pitiful eyes at the one man she loved more than anything else in the world, but could no longer have.
Not now that he was married.
"No…that's not possible…I tried…" Wyatt stammered as he backed away from her.
Lucy shook her head sadly as she sobbed, "Rittenhouse…they must have found a way, after all…I didn't think they could actually do it…but."
"Wait a minute…you knew about this?" Wyatt accused in a harsh whisper. "You knew…and you didn't tell me?" Wyatt shook his head in frustration and paced back and forth in front of her as he rubbed a hand on the back of his neck, "Jesus, Lucy…how could you not tell me something like that?"
She was so ashamed of everything she had done, she couldn't bear to look him in the eye as she answered softly, "I didn't know how." At his derisive laugh she continued, "I wanted to, Wyatt. I really did" she gasped, "but Fl…Flynn convinced me there was nothing to worry about…that it was j…just a scare tactic." she explained, but a moment later, she wished that she had just kept that explanation to herself.
"Flynn?" Wyatt had stopped pacing and was staring at her as if she had just slapped him in the face. "You told Flynn that they were planning on bringing back my wife, but you couldn't tell me?" Lucy couldn't meet his eye. Instead, she leaned her head up against the wall and covered her eyes with her hand, too ashamed to even speak. Wyatt, getting his confirmation with her silence, breathed out a curse and retreated down the hall, leaving Lucy all alone on the cold bunker floor.
That had been nearly two hours ago…and Lucy, not daring to show her face to any other member of their team, least of all Wyatt, had retreated into the recesses of her old…but now, current room to reflect on all that she had lost.
A soft knock on her door, however, had her wiping away the remnants of her tears and sitting up a bit straighter in both hopeful anticipation and mounting dread of who it might be. "Come in." she called out in a quavering voice, her hope increasing as she saw the door handle turn.
That hope was dashed slightly as Jiya's head appeared in the doorway, a sympathetic frown on her face, "You okay?" she asked as she eased into the room and stood awkwardly by the door.
Unable to answer that question, Lucy merely shrugged and heaved a heavy sigh.
"This must be really awful for you." Jiya offered apologetically. "I mean…to come back from a mission and find out…
"That I'm the other woman?" Lucy muttered despondently as she raised her eyebrows, "Yeah…that's not something you tend to wish on anybody." Lucy swallowed hard as she asked the question that was weighing most on her mind hardly knowing if she even wanted the answer, "Is he…did he leave? Wyatt…is he with Jessica?"
"No…well, not yet, anyway." Jiya responded uneasily. "They actually asked me to come get you…he's been talking with Agent Christopher."
"Oh." Lucy breathed out as a fresh rush of guilt and shame made its way to her cheeks. "Okay…I'll be right there."
Lucy took little comfort in the fact that Wyatt had spent the last two hour speaking to Agent Christopher instead of running off to be reunited with the wife he had loved and lost. She had no reason to hope that his delay had anything to do with her, particularly since it was Jiya who had been tasked to fetch Lucy from her room like she was being called to the Principal's office. As she made her way down the hall, she was further convinced of her own insignificance as she noted with dread, that the entire team was assembled around the kitchen table, with a stony-faced Wyatt in the midst of them sitting before a sea of official looking papers and folders.
Flynn offered Lucy a hint of a sympathetic frown as he sat back in his own chair while she took a seat as far away from Wyatt as she could possibly be. She didn't feel like she had any right to claim anything other than a professional working relationship with him anymore and given his almost non-reaction to her sudden appearance, she deduced he felt the same way.
Feeling the eyes of everyone except Wyatt on her, Lucy felt the shame of her situation all the more, "Do we really have to do this with everybody?" she asked weakly.
"This concerns the entire team, Lucy." Agent Christopher explained gently. "As we were just communicating to Wyatt, we discovered this morning that pictures of Jessica are on the Rittenhouse data files we obtained from the raid made on their headquarters."
Lucy's eyes darted to Wyatt, but his eyes were trained on the table. Whether he was still angry at her for not confiding in him or just overwhelmed with the enormity of the situation, she had no idea, but she tried to offer some sort of assurance to him all the same, "Maybe her pictures are in their files because they're keeping tabs on all of us…on all of our loved ones.
"Yes, that could be true." Agent Christopher nodded thoughtfully, "but…according to you, Rittenhouse was behind her return.
"So, what you're saying is that Rittenhouse brought back Wyatt's wife to be a spy?" Flynn observed carefully, his voice measured and forcefully calm.
Wyatt turned to look at Flynn, "She's not a damn spy." he spat out angrily. "I can't…I can't believe that Jessica would be a part of Rittenhouse." He scoffed as he shook his head "She's nothing like those elitist assholes. She's from a working-class family. Hell, she grew up in West Texas…what does 1980 San Diego have to do with any of this?"
"We're working on that." Mason said with a nod towards Jiya. "It does seem strange that one quick trip to San Diego would have such a…significant effect on the timeline, particularly since according to you, the only significance that has for her is that is where she died….in your timeline anyway."
"Lucy," Agent Christopher asked gently, "Wyatt told us you may have some information about Rittenhouse's efforts to bring back Jessica…this…Plan B? What is that?"
Lucy took a shuddering breath as she felt, rather than saw, Wyatt's gaze rest on her. "I didn't…I wasn't in on the specific details…" she tried to explain.
"Just tell us what you know." Agent Christopher offered. "Anything to help us get a clearer picture of what has happened."
Lucy nodded as tears began to pool in her eyes. "Plan B was something they held over my head while I was being held there after 1934." she sighed, "My mother came to me in my room not long after I arrived…and told me that I could either cooperate or they would…ma…make life difficult for me."
'Difficult, how?" Agent Christopher asked patiently.
"By bringing Jessica back." Lucy groaned as she rubbed her hands on her temples, "She told me that if I didn't comply they would make sure…I remembered everything."
"What do you mean?" Agent Christopher asked. "Remember what?"
Taking a steadying breath, Lucy explained in a voice trembling with emotion, "The plan was to make Wyatt forget me…make us forget each other by changing the timeline to where Jessica never died. By bringing her back, they supposed that Wyatt would never have been selected for this mission…and we would have never met." Wyatt straightened up in his chair and turned his full attention to Lucy as she sobbed quietly. "I didn't want that to happen…but I thought it would be less painful than the alternative." Lucy admitted ruefully, "so I did whatever they asked me. I read their stupid manifesto, I sat through my great grandfather's lectures, I…I tried to keep Wyatt from bringing me back." She bit her lip as tears fell from her eyes, "I'm so sorry."
"Lucy," Wyatt whispered incredulously, "What the hell are you apologizing for?"
"Wait a minute," Rufus interjected, "are you saying that because Wyatt came to get you, they brought Jessica back from the dead?"
"Mmm…I think the plan was always to bring her back, Rufus." Mason explained with a sympathetic look towards Lucy. "It's the timing of it which was up for argument."
"What do you mean?" Rufus looked around the table completely baffled, "either way, she's back and it completely screws with the timeline."
"It's obvious, isn't it?" Flynn interjected, "By bringing her back while they were both in the past, this hurts them both more than if they were completely ignorant of the change."
Rufus shook his head, "That is some messed up family drama. No offense, Lucy but your mother is one hell of a piece of work."
Lucy let out a derisive chuckle, she couldn't do much else. How could she take offense when everything Rufus had said was true? The entire reason they were hiding underground was because of her family…hermother. She cast her eyes around the table at the sad little group of refugees they were. Flynn had been framed for his family's murder, Rufus' family believed he was dead, Mason lost his entire business, Agent Christopher had been beaten when she refused to bench Lucy. How she could dare claim that she was doing that out of love…
"If I wouldn't have gone to New York…I wouldn't have remembered." she mumbled to herself. Lucy sat back in astonishment remembering what Agent Christopher had told her that morning, You should know she actually seems concerned about your welfare. "They would have brought her back and I would've forgotten everything…" she looked at Agent Christopher, who even in this timeline, donned the bruises of her counterpart in the other, "maybe that's why my mother wanted me benched…to make things easier for me."
"Easier for you?" Wyatt asked as he sat forward, "Your mother wanted you benched because Rittenhouse is trying to kill you." Wyatt reminded her, "Do you honestly think she gives a damn about whether or not you'd remember me?"
"It would work to their advantage if she didn't." Flynn mused thoughtfully. "Lucy has proven to be stubborn and headstrong…particularly when it comes to you." He nodded meaningfully at Wyatt, "For you, getting back the wife you love and have mourned for six years…and with Lucy not remembering you…"
"What?" snapped Wyatt. "You think I'd just…"he pushed away from the table and stood up, pacing in agitation. "Just because Lucy didn't remember doesn't mean I would've forgotten." he spat out. "What the hell kind of person do you think I am?"
"Married." Flynn said simply. "Unless, of course, those vows you made don't mean anything to you."
Wyatt glared at Flynn as Agent Christopher interjected, "I don't think we need to make any kind of moral judgements here. Obviously, these circumstances are extenuating."
"Yeah," said Rufus jumping to Wyatt's defense, "and if she's a Rittenhouse agent…"
"She's not a Rittenhouse agent." Wyatt maintained huffily. "
"How do explain her photos in their database, then?" answered Flynn, "And forgive me if I'm wrong, but aren't you supposed to be dead? How does she even know you're alive?"
"How the hell am I supposed to know that?" Wyatt spat out angrily. "You think I was sending her text messages from a classified bunker? In my timeline, she's dead."
"Flynn does have a point." Agent Christopher quipped as she crossed her arms over her chest. "According to the military, you are Missing in Action, Presumed Dead. You may have been estranged from her at the time of the explosion, but as she was your next of kin, she would have been notified."
"Rittenhouse could have told her that Wyatt was alive." Lucy answered softly. "If they brought her back to…" Lucy swallowed hard, unable to say the words everyone was thinking, "obviously, they would make sure she knew he was alive."
"Which would explain the text messages." Wyatt spat out meaningfully to Flynn.
At that, Lucy's curiosity was piqued. Silently getting an assurance from Wyatt, she reached for his discarded phone on the table, her shaking finger hovering over text message after text message from Jessica, each one asking where he was, why he hadn't contacted her in months, what he was doing.
She all but demanded to see him.
Looking at his phone, Lucy couldn't help but feel sorry for Jessica. If she really was, as Wyatt believed, an innocent victim in all of this, her reality, until recently, had been that Wyatt had been killed. Even if they had been estranged at the time of that bombing at Mason Industries, it didn't mean that she wouldn't be affected by it. If she really loved Wyatt and their last moments together had been unhappy, she probably lived with the same guilt Wyatt had known.
"I have to see her." Wyatt said with a thoughtful purse of his lips. "I have to see her for myself. He looked up at Agent Christopher, "It's the only way…we can sit here and talk about theories all damn day, but it's not going to give us any real answers."
He pulled away from the table as Agent Christopher lifted her hand in pause, "I cannot guarantee your safety if you do this."
"She's my wife." Wyatt spat out angrily. "I think I know her well enough to know she wouldn't be involved with this…"
"Wyatt," Agent Christopher warned, "we can never be too careful. Remember, Lucy would never have believed her mother..."
"That's different." Wyatt gritted out with a shake of his head, "Jessica isn't like…them." At Lucy's sharp intake of breath, Wyatt threw his head back and gave an exasperated sigh, "That's not what I meant, Lucy…"
She, however, had been mortified enough. She was already keenly aware that in the eyes of some of their team members she was little more than an adulteress, but to know that it was her family that was responsible for bringing so much grief to everyone in that room…upending their lives and playing with their emotions…she just needed to get away from it all. Excusing herself, Lucy skirted past the table and made her way back down the hall towards her bedroom.
"Now you've done it." Flynn muttered as Wyatt breathed out a curse and chased after her down the hall.
Lucy had almost reached the door to her room when Wyatt called out to her desperately, "Lucy, wait!" She turned reluctantly to meet him, feeling that an any moment her emotions would get the better of her. Wyatt, sensing her hesitancy, apologized, "Look, I didn't mean that you are anything like those Rittenhouse dicks." He rubbed the back of his neck with his hand as he continued, "It's just…I don't know what the hell to do…or what to even think."
Lucy leaned against the wall for support, her heart aching as he looked more helpless than she had ever seen him. "I'm sorry, Wyatt." she whispered. "I should have told you."
He clenched his jaw as he looked at her, "Why didn't you? Lucy…my God, you were ready to let them…" he bit his lip as he attempted to compose himself before stating coldly, "I guess I should just be glad you still remember me, right?"
"Wyatt," Lucy implored, "I didn't want that…I didn't want any of this. Do you have any idea how upset I was knowing that at any moment…"
"No, I don't, because you didn't tell me." Wyatt snapped back, "you told Flynn." He shook his head in frustration, "Flynn."
"I didn't mean to tell him." Lucy sighed in anguished defeat. "I just needed a drink…and he had the bottle." Lucy muttered mechanically as she sank down on the floor, "I thought that maybe he could tell me more about that journal. Why I gave it to him, why I wrote it…what was I trying to change…and if I was trying to change my future, how that didn't make me any better than my mother."
"What do you mean, Lucy?" Wyatt breathed out in exasperation, "You're nothing like your mother."
Lucy let out a short laugh, "You know, Flynn said the same thing. Funny…he doesn't even know my mother."
Wyatt observed her for a short while before taking a seat next to her on the floor, "So does the journal say anything about…all of this?"
Lucy leaned her head back against the wall and shook her head, "I don't know." She sighed, "Flynn said he didn't think my giving him the journal was about changing my future…he said it was to stop Rittenhouse from ruining it."
"Well, what the hell does that mean?" Wyatt asked.
"I don't know…but he…" Lucy scoffed, "I know you don't like that I told him, Wyatt…but he really made me believe that Rittenhouse was just trying to exploit our relationship…just like they did in Salem." She sighed, "I was so sure he was right."
"Maybe he was." Wyatt muttered. "I mean, I'm pretty damn sure they didn't bring Jessica back to do me any favors." He let out a derisive chuckle as he leaned his own head back against the wall. Silence fell between them, neither quite knowing what to say in the face of their altered situation. When Wyatt finally did speak, the words he spoke sent a stabbing pain through her heart, "I have to see her, Lucy. I can't believe it until I see it with my own eyes."
"I know." Lucy nodded in understanding, though it took every ounce of self-restraint she had to not beg him stay.
Agent Christopher refused to allow Wyatt to leave without first setting up a reconnaissance mission in an attempt to determine whether it was safe for him to do so. While Wyatt was visibly impatient, Lucy was grateful that Agent Christopher had had the foresight to consider that this whole thing may be some kind of elaborate trap.
Several days passed and no information was forthcoming. Wyatt paced around the bunker like a madman ready to snap, and Lucy, already feeling as if she were a third wheel in the melodrama, kept herself tucked away in her room, avoiding Wyatt and the sympathetic eyes of everyone in the bunker as much as she could.
There was no use in denying the inevitable. Wyatt was married…to his lightning bolt. His greatest regret had become his greatest miracle…a new opportunity at a life with the woman he had first loved. As much as Lucy wished she could anchor a hope on the fact that he also loved her, she knew that holding him to that declaration in the face of all of this, was wrong. It wasn't his fault Jessica was back, and loving him as she did, she couldn't bear to be the person that kept him from having that second chance he had wanted for so long.
Wyatt seemed just as anxious to avoid her. In the times that they did meet in the bunker, whether it was bumping into each other outside of the bathroom, sitting across from each other at meal times, or just passing each other idly in the hall, guilt would cloud his features and where typically he would banter and flirt with her, now, he would stammer off an apology or make a flat observation before ducking away to his own carved out corner of their underground prison.
Finally, the day that Lucy had been simultaneously dreading and wishing had already come, arrived. Agent Christopher summoned Wyatt from the common room to the kitchen table with the long-awaited news from her reconnaissance team.
Lucy, who was sitting on the couch, couldn't help but cast wary glances towards them as they chatted together over what the team had discovered.
"She's working at a bar in San Francisco." Agent Christopher announced finally as he took his seat at the table, "So far, nothing seems amiss. Her background seems to check out, she's been employed there since you both moved to the area when you were called to take this assignment."
"So, she's not a spy?" Wyatt said with a meaningful eye towards Garcia Flynn who was in his usual chair, reading.
"You know as well as I do, Wyatt, "Agent Christopher warned, "you cannot trust things at face value. If Rittenhouse brought her back, we need to assume that there is a reason behind it, that doesn't just include your personal life."
"You got a location for this bar?" Wyatt asked anxiously as he leaned forward.
"The Forgery Bar on Mission." Agent Christopher answered as handed Wyatt a manila folder, "Here's all the information we were able to gather."
Taking a steeling breath, he took the folder from her, flipping it open with an eagerness that spoke to his current state of mind. As his eyes scanned the contents, he passed a hand over his jaw as his eyes softened at what Lucy cold only assume was a picture of…
"Jessica." Wyatt whispered. "Oh my God, it's actually her." He let out a shuddering breath as leaned forward over the folder, staring at the picture in complete and total disbelief.
"Take all the time that you need." Agent Christopher murmured, "When you're ready, we have a car waiting at your disposal."
Wyatt pored over the photos, taking in every last detail he could about this Jessica who looked so familiar, but after six years apart, looked somehow different than the woman he remembered. Her hair was shorter and her expression seemed harder than it had been, but, she was still essentially Jessica.
His anxiety began to mount as he considered what he would say to her after six years of guilt and regret. What had their lives been like in that time? If they were really estranged, what had happened between them? Would she be angry with him? Would she be happy to see him? Relieved that he was alive? If she was working for Rittenhouse, would he know her enough now, after six years, to know? Closing the folder with a sigh, Wyatt pushed away from the table, determined to take things just one step at a time. He was just sliding on his jacket, when his eyes drifted over to Lucy, who was sitting alone toying absent mindedly with her necklace, and reading a book.
Taking a steadying breath, he eased his way over to her, his feelings for her overwhelming any voice in the back of his head that told him he was not free to do so, "I'm…I'm going to be heading out soon." he murmured as he placed his hands on her shoulders gently caressing them while he bent down to press a kiss to her cheek.
She, however, leapt away from his touch as if she were burned, scrambling to her feet to face him, "What are you doing?" she asked breathlessly.
He looked back at her, hurt and confusion all over his face, as he stepped forward towards her, "Lucy, I still love you…this doesn't change that."
"You are married, Wyatt." Lucy hissed out incredulously. "You're about to go see your wife." Wyatt rubbed a rough hand on the back of his neck as Lucy continued, "We have to accept the fact that this timeline is different." Tears pooled in her eyes as she tried to explain, "You've been given a second chance, Wyatt…what you've always wanted. Rittenhouse or no, that is the closest thing to a miracle I have ever seen, and there is no way I'm going to stand between you – that is not who I am."
Wyatt hung his head down in apparent shame, "I'm glad you are who you are." he muttered affectionately, "but Lucy…where does this leave us? I don't want to lose you."
Lucy stood there staring at him, gasping for a breath that would not come. "There is no us" she finally sobbed out, "not anymore." Wyatt made to argue, but Lucy stopped him as she nodded her head firmly, "No, Wyatt. She's your wife…and you love her."
"I love you." Wyatt said firmly, knocking Lucy off-balance, but she couldn't accept that. She could not and would not lose her head…she was no adulteress and she had no intention of becoming one.
"When I first met you, you told me that the one thing you wanted more than anything in the world was to change what had happened to Jessica." Lucy contended. "Wyatt, you just got the love of your life back." She nodded her head vigorously as if trying to convince herself of her next statement, though the expression on her face betrayed her broken heart, "This…this is a good thing." Wyatt stared back at her looking every bit as conflicted as she imagined anyone in his position might feel. Determined to not stand in the way of his marriage, Lucy swallowed hard and forced a smile on her face as she added, "I'm…I'm so happy for you."
"You're lying." Wyatt gritted out through his unshed tears as he reached out a hand to cup her face. "I know you are…admit it."
Lucy, however, shook her head and stepped away from him. "You need to go, Wyatt." she pleaded. "Go…go see Jessica."
Dropping his hand from her face as his own twisted in agony, Lucy backed away from him as he looked back at her helplessly. She folded her arms across her chest and huffed out a shaky breath and Wyatt knew it was no use. Lucy was right. He was married and things between them could not be the same. Quirking his lip at her as he fought off his own tears, Wyatt made his way down the hall and towards the main bunker door.
"That was very brave of you." Flynn acknowledged quietly from the corner.
Lucy sucked in a breath and turned abruptly to face him, quickly wiping away her tears, "Didn't Rufus tell you that eavesdropping was rude?"
Flynn lifted his book, "I wasn't. I…uh…didn't mean to eavesdrop, I was just coming to get my book and…well, I didn't want to interrupt." Flynn nodded, "I'm sorry, Lucy."
Whether Flynn was apologizing for eavesdropping or for what had passed between her and Wyatt, she didn't know…nor did she care. She quickly turned and marched quickly down the hall, closing her bedroom door behind her with a deafening snap. The barrage of tears she had tried so hard to keep at bay, came flooding through like a burst dam, causing her to shake and convulse with the power of her overwrought emotions. She lay down on her cot, staring up at the ceiling for hours, until the light grew dimmer and her parched throat and dry eyes demanded attention. Slowly, she got up and cautiously opened the door, half afraid that Wyatt would be on the other side, waiting for her, ready to lead her down a road of temptation that a poisonous part of her would happily traverse with him. No moral dilemma was to be had, however. Her door swung open to reveal nothing but an empty and darkened hallway.
Silently making her way towards the common room, she was relieved once again to find that no one was lounging around. Rufus, Jiya, and Mason were busy making modifications to the LifeBoat and hadn't seen her, Agent Christopher had long gone home, and Flynn…had apparently taken refuge in his room.
Not wanting to think about where Wyatt was and what he might be doing, Lucy resolutely made her way over to the cupboard, with every intention of filling up a water bottle and heading back to her room when Jiya's voice sounded beside her. "Have a cold one, on me." She said with a smirk as she offered Lucy a beer.
Lucy jumped slightly, not sure how Jiya had made it over to her so swiftly and silently, but one look towards the Lifeboat, seeing Rufus ducking his head away quickly, convinced her that they had been watching and waiting for her. Lucy smiled despite the pain in her heart and took the proffered bottle gladly, "Thanks" she muttered.
"You could use it…we all could." Jiya said with a roll of her eyes before joining Lucy at the table. They both sat together in silence for a while, taking small sips of their beers before Jiya hesitantly asked, "Wyatt loves you…doesn't he?" Lucy paused, the bottle suspended, tipped towards her mouth for another drink, before she set it down on the table with a heavy sigh. "I'm sorry." Jiya muttered uncomfortably, "I shouldn't pry."
"No…no, Jiya." Lucy said with a shake of her head, "it's okay." "He does…but now…"she pursed her lips as she fought off a fresh wave of tears, "now it doesn't matter."
"I wouldn't say that." Jiya said with a shrug, "you know, in this timeline…you may not have been a couple, but you were close." she nodded meaningfully, "the way you two danced around each other…it was clear to any one paying attention that…well…that there was a hope for something more.
"But we never…" Lucy bristled defensively.
"No." Jiya assured her. "No…you two were both straight as an arrow when it came to that sort of thing." Jiya pursed her lips as if debating whether or not to press the issue further, "Though I think it was pretty obvious to everyone that Wyatt wasn't happy with Jessica…even before you two became such good friends."
"Whatever problems they had," Lucy said with a shrug, "it doesn't matter now. This Wyatt has lived with years of regret and guilt over her death. I know he'd do anything to have her back…even if it means giving up all this."
"Giving you up, you mean?" Jiya corrected. "I don't mean to burst your bubble of self-delusion, Lucy…but I just don't see any version of Wyatt doing that."
Lucy offered Jiya a sad smile as she took another drink of her beer. "He already has, Jiya. He tried so many times to save her…he sent her a telegram from 1962…he even stole the time machine, risking his place on the team…he was even arrested…all for her." Lucy sighed heavily, "He may say that he loves me…but Jessica…she's the one he's risked everything for."
"What are we talking about, ladies?" Rufus uttered as he pulled out a chair and plopped down beside Jiya.
"Taking risks." Lucy said quickly, not wanting to wallow in self-pity in front of Rufus.
"Speaking of taking risks" Rufus muttered in a low voice to Jiya, as he looked over his shoulder at Mason, "do you really think this auto-pilot thing is a good idea?"
"Auto-pilot?" Lucy asked, grateful to talk about anything else other than Wyatt and Jessica, "I don't know if I like the sound of that…"
Rufus nodded his head as he pointed to her, "See…I knew I wouldn't be the only one. I love technology, but…it takes precision to pilot that thing…one glitch and we're…well, I don't know what exactly would happen to us, but I'm guessing it wouldn't be good."
"Rufus, it's turning the LifeBoat into a DeLorean…if anything you should be excited about that."
"Have you seen the Back to the Future movies?" Rufus asked her incredulously. "All it took was one bolt of lightning and BAM! Doc Brown was stuck in the Old West."
"C'mon Rufus." Jiya teased, "You know it doesn't work like that."
"Fine. It's called job security, Jiya. If I'm not needed as the pilot, then what the hell am I good for?"
"Rufus, you're more than just the pilot." Lucy consoled, "Don't you remember the Watergate mission? We would have never gotten to Doc without you." Rufus shrugged slightly as Lucy shook her head, "But why do the auto-pilot anyway? Between you and Jiya…"
"Mason is paranoid." Rufus confided to her in a whisper, "Ever since I almost got shot in that bar with Robert Johnson, he's been freaking out saying that he could've been stranded back in 1936. So…he wants to make it so any one of you could pilot the Lifeboat, if needed…which again, means my contribution to the team? Pretty much non-existent once we get this thing up and running."
"Rufus, that's not true." Lucy emphasized firmly, "I think you have more than proved yourself on these missions. Watergate, Paris, the Alamo, Hollywood…and I know for a fact we would have never survived Bonnie and Clyde without you."
"Yeah…and who diffused that Nazi bomb? Or was Ian Fleming just being generous to your character in Weapon of Choice?" Jiya ribbed.
"Okay, okay…so my job is piloting the LifeBoat and occasionally teaming up with someone awesome in history to keep Wyatt and Lucy from dying horrible deaths at the hands of Nazis and bank robbers. I'm a glorified babysitter."
"Wha…?" Lucy gasped out, "I beg your pardon…we don't need babysitting, Rufus. I think, under the circumstances, we manage pretty well. I mean, who got us out of that Nazi castle?"
"Yeah, well we would never have had to escape the Nazi castle if you hadn't been all "oh sure, Ian Fleming, I'll be your secretary." Rufus mimed with a roll of his eyes. Lucy turned to argue with him, but Rufus cut her off, "C'mon Lucy, admit it, you went along with that plan to impress James Bond. Hell, even Wyatt said it was a bad idea."
"I'm sorry?" Lucy gasped out, affronted. "Ian Fleming had nothing to do with my decision. We had to find out what Flynn wanted with Von Braun, and we couldn't exactly explain why it was so important…"
"Okay, then, " Rufus conceded, "it was your stubbornness that almost got us all killed in Nazi Germany."
"What was I supposed to do? Not stop Flynn? Let him hand off Von Braun to the Soviets? It wasn't stubbornness," she maintained huffily, "it was…it was" memories of that mission, of Wyatt, marched their way across mind like an unwelcome, goose-stepping army. She shook her head to clear her thoughts, but Rufus was still arguing with her.
"…and it wasn't just that mission, who's the one who refused to stay behind when THE Bass Reeves told her to stay behind?"
"Um…I seem to remember being the one to shoot Jesse James." Lucy countered, grateful to replace warm thoughts of Wyatt with scenes from that cold and dismal mission to 19thcentury Missouri.
"Yeah, after Bass told you not to." Rufus responded as he took a drink from Jiya's beer.
"He was supposed to be dead!" Lucy argued.
"Fair enough." Rufus conceded, "But who was the one who left Wyatt standing helpless and lovesick in a medical tent in 1918 after he had been going out of his mind for six weeks, risking court martials and broken bones to find you?" Rufus quipped as Lucy stared at him in surprise, "But no, you were still dead set on blowing up that damn mothership…which, didn't happen by the way…had to save your ass at the last minute on that one too."
"What did you say?" Lucy breathed out as she gaped at Rufus.
"We had to save your ass at the last minute." Rufus answered her unconcernedly. "Don't try to act like Emma wouldn't have killed you if we hadn't shown up…"
"No…I mean…I mean, the other thing…about Wyatt." Lucy said in a voice piqued with curiosity.
"What? That he was clearly head over heels in love with you? Or the fact that he had been going out of his damn mind for six weeks trying to break out of this bunker to find you?" Rufus asked with raised eyebrows. "What the hell do you think happened here during those six weeks, Lucy?" Rufus prompted sardonically, "You think we just sat around here playing checkers?"
"I…I don't know…I just thought…"
"Even in my timeline he was crazy worried." Jiya announced with a nod, "I walked in on him punching the bathroom wall…broke one of those crappy tiles above the sink."
Lucy gaped at the two of them, but shook her head to recover her composure, "Well, that doesn't mean…"
"Lucy, he tried to buzz saw his way out of here just to find you." Rufus countered. "And when Agent Christopher caught him, he didn't give a damn…he told her to court martial him."
"Hmmm…sounds like he would risk everything for you, too." Jiya muttered quietly with a small smile to Lucy.
"Jessica is his wife." Lucy argued feebly. "It doesn't matter what he did then…it doesn't change the fact that he's married...married to someone he has loved for longer than he has even known me." Lucy contended as she stood up from the table. "Th…thanks for the beer." she muttered to Jiya. "I…um…think I'm just going to go to bed."
Lucy made the lonely journey back to her room, her heart too heavy to do more than crawl under her covers and cry softly into her pillow. She was kicking herself for agreeing to that beer. To know now just how much Wyatt had done for her, how much he had risked on her behalf, was more than a little bittersweet – it just put into glaring perspective how much she had really lost.
She was exhausted, emotionally spent, but sleep refused to come….and as she had no desire to make her way back out into the common room, she tossed and turned the rest of the night wishing that she could just turn off the never-ending movie reel of regret that was playing through her mind, wondering if Wyatt was doing the same thing…wherever he was.
Notes:
OH THE ANGST! I know...it's horrible...but they're in a HORRIBLE situation right now and Wyatt is really a man torn apart...to make him completely indifferent to Jessica's return wouldn't be realistic..and of course, he has to go to see her...she is his WIFE after all.
One thing I really wanted in this fic was to have Rufus talk to Lucy about what Wyatt had done in the six weeks she was missing. Doing it here when she's comparing his love for her to his love for Jessica was my way of sort of slapping Lucy with a truth bomb - that yes, Wyatt would risk everything for Lucy too...and so she should probably sit up and take notice.
I hope you enjoyed this update. I'm really working hard to get this one finished, because I really would love to start sharing Stranded with you all, but I've had to abandon writing that one so I can finish this and Torrent. What can I say, I can't do all of these fics at the same time...my head just can't be in that many stories at once.
I hope you all have a great weekend!
