TRIGGER WARNING: Implied/Referenced suicide, suicidal thoughts, self-harm, cutting, anxiety, traumatic situation.

Seriously, please do not read this if any of those things are going to be triggering for you. I in no way want to bring any harm to anyone else struggling with their mental health. The TLDR: Pepa and Julieta see the dark door, find his journal and some evidence of him self-harming, conclude Bruno killed himself (he did not actually). If that is going to trigger you, I am so sorry that you experienced anything in the realm of the warnings and I sincerely hope you know how truly great you are.

Cross posted to ao3, I do not own Encanto or the characters.

DISCLAIMER: I am not Colombian and my only lessons on Spanish were in high school, meaning I do not actually know Spanish. I tried to use it sparingly, but please let me know if I need to correct anything! The same goes for cultural aspects!

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It had been a week since Mirabel turned five. A week since the magic seemingly faltered, maybe failed? A week since Bruno Madrigal went missing. A week since all of these things had gone wrong, leaving behind a devastated, not quite whole, familia.

Julieta was working overtime in her role as the healer of the family, only this week tending to the emotional wounds over physical. Her youngest daughter who desperately needed an answer 'Why me mami?' That she couldn't provide. Her own mama also looking for answers 'Julieta I don't understand what went wrong. Why did the miracle not bless your daughter? And what was so terrifying about the future that it caused your brother to leave? To abandon our familia?' That she lacked all the same.

And yet, she was trying her best. She needed to be strong for her hija. For her mama.

So when Pepa came running into Julieta's room in the middle of the night with a storm raging over her head, Julieta was tired.

"Pepa, shh Mirabel is in here. I'll meet you in the hall in a minute." She stage whispered across to her sister.

"Hurry!" With that Pepa rushed back out of the room.

Julieta made her way out the door, pausing to slip on shoes. She left her room to find a worse storm than before.

"Pepa, hermana, what's wrong? I only just got Mirabel to stop crying." Pepa let out a shaky sob and Julieta's eyebrows furrowed, even more confused. She jogged over to her sister, taking her hands in her own.

"Pepa, you need to breathe. On my count, okay?" Pepa gave a slight nod in confirmation, "Okay, in one two three, out one two three four. In one two three, out one two three four. Pepa, is someone injured?" Julieta tried to read her sisters facial expression as she shook her entire body, shrugging? Julieta can't tell if that's a yes or no, so she'll assume it's a maybe. "Take me there." Her sister's breathing has finally evened out, though the tears and the storm rage on. Julieta is led to the foot of the stairs that lead to their brothers tower. As her gaze lifts, her heart drops and she is certain that if she shared Pepa's gift of the weather that a storm would've formed around her too.

Bruno's door.

Was.

Dark.

No one's door had ever gone dark before. Mirabel's had simply crumbled when the magic faltered. If her brother somehow managed to get rid of his gift—it stands to reason his door would just be gone. That would've been infinitely better than what the hermanas decided the dark door meant.

Julieta wiped her face, not sure whether she was rubbing away rain or tears. Her features shifted into one of determination. She grabbed Pepa's hand. "Come on. We're going in there. You know he's always had secret rooms and tunnels. This isn't the first time he's gone awol for a week. There has to be some other explanation." She didn't need to explain what she meant by other. It was also where Pepa's mind had gone. After all, Dolores, who was still training her gift to be able to hone in on listening to just one person or setting, had said she couldn't hear him. Only the rats remained in his passageways.

Still, the sisters began their way up the massive winding staircase, having to move at a snail's pace so as to not be tripped by the wind and rain that came down harder and harder the more their search turned up empty. The women were fumbling to find the entrances to hideouts they had long since visited, unsure if they still existed.

Finally on one of the wider landings, Pepa knocked aside a rock, triggering an entrance to appear in the stone. Julieta rushed ahead, her sister close behind. They came into a cave, not the tunnel system, that appeared to be Bruno's bedroom. Unlit lanterns decorated the wall's and rows upon rows of books sat along shelves. Two plush sitting chairs were in one corner of the room, a bed in the other. On the far wall, there was a desk with a lantern right above it and a book being partially held open by a pencil.

Julieta went to the desk first. Opening the book, she realized the hard to decipher scribblings were Bruno's. This was a journal. This was his journal. She knew she shouldn't read it. She knew a better sister wouldn't. But the magic failed her daughter and she needed to know if she needed to make room in her heart to also grieve for her brother.

Julieta flipped back through the pages, until she finally came across an entry she could kind of read. The first entry was dated from when the triplets were in their mid-twenties, so she knew this wasn't a very dedicatedly-kept journal. Still, the presence of the book on his desk made her think there had to be some sort of hints as to what Bruno had been thinking recently. How he had been feeling. She stopped on a page dated a year earlier, she could see the impression of dried tears on the entry.

Mi sobrinas Isabela and Dolores asked me for prophecies today. Begged me. Just like they have been for the past week. I finally broke down and did them. I fucked up. I shouldn't have done that. Isabela's went okay, her life seems like it turns out pretty good, she was a genuinely happy woman in her future, swinging down a vine with a laugh on her face. She had been really excited and left poor Dolores to hear her's all alone. Isabela ran off, to tell Luisa or Julieta I hope. Dios, I hope she doesn't tell mama. I can't handle another lecture right now. Isabela was her perfecta nieta, she would be furious if she found out I risked her future by doing a vision. Bad luck bruno and all. She WILL be furious if she hears Dolores'. She asked about love. And I had to tell her that the man of her dreams is going to propose to someone else. While she watched. She ran away from me crying. I would run away from me crying too if I could. I cried after they left. I had hoped, prayed, that hers would be good like her prima's. Its not fair to her that it wasn't. It's not fair to me either that the vision was bad, but it might as well be my entire fault because now she's going to doubt herself forever. Be fearful of any possible romantic connections. Fuck. I fucked up. I AM a fuck up. Maybe I should do what the town wants. What mama will claim she doesn't want, claim to be devastated by, but secretly be relieved about. Pepa and Julieta have their own families now. They've always been stronger than me. They'll help one another through it. Will I finally stop hurting? Finally know peace? Will I ever be able to get rid of this weight on my chest? Of this ache in my head and constant fear of what I, and I alone, am cursed with knowing is inevitable? I can't keep doing this. I can't keep ruining everyones lives just because I selfishly want to be included. I can't keep living like this. There's a reason everyone hates me. I fucking hate me too.

While she was reading, Pepa had been walking along the sides of the rooms, looking along the shelves, by the chairs, in his nightstand, under his pillows. She was searching for something, Julieta wasn't entirely sure what. Julieta finished reading and felt a cold spreading across her chest, as fear gripped her heart. Her worst fears confirmed in writing. She knew she was crying. She was about to call her sister over when Pepa beat her to it.

"Julieta!" The storm around Julieta's sister increased, and Pepa fell to her knees. "Querido dios por favor perdóname, Julieta i'm so sorry. I'm so sorry." Pepa put her head down, continuing to softly pray and beg for forgiveness. Julieta struggled through the wind to get to her, feeling just as guilty.

"Pepa! Pepa, I'm the one who should be sorry, I never realized just how… just how bad your gifts were treated by the townspeople. By our own familia." Julieta had reached one of her siblings. The only one she had left. And grabbed onto her like the anchor she was. "Pepa, por favor, speak to me. What did you find? Why are you apologizing?" Julieta was sobbing now too. Pepa's cries only worsened at Julieta's questions and she simply pointed at the floor next to her. Sitting on the rug where Julieta hadn't noticed before was a small box. With a shaking hand, Julieta reached through the rain and grabbed it, dropping it right back to the rug when she saw what Pepa had seen.

The box had razor blades.

Julieta let the emotions of the week finally catch up to her. The journal and the blades only confirmed what her and Pepa had long feared. They failed him. They failed Bruno. Their hermanito, their baby brother, a fact they never let him forget. It was their job to look out for one another. It was her job to heal. And yet her whole family was breaking into pieces.

She broke down, clinging onto Pepa, the two of them getting soaked to the bone by the rain and drowned in their own grief. Casita tried their best to contain su sol's weather, wishing they could tell her and su sanador that su vidente was safe. That he was right on the other side of the wall, grieving with his hermanas. Questioning if hiding was for the best. If he should just brave the storm and join their embrace. But he doesn't. And so, when his hermanas finally picked up the pieces of themselves that were left, a new rule was filtered through Casita's halls and eventually the entire Encanto.

We don't talk about Bruno.

Pepa and Julieta couldn't handle the reminder of their permanently missing piece.